₦airaland Forum

Ferdyboss:
@Marxxx, Tolutweety , Davide470. I just got off the phone with everyone who has applied so far, and guess what? No one cares oooo provided application is free of charge

Environmental toxicology is so limiting. .. why don't you do general toxicology?

Environmental courses are just so much now in Naija...Almost everyone has HSE...
so much competition and limited opportunities. .

nyben4eva:
Try to have a heart to heart discussion with him,ask him what you've done wrong to deserve all he does to you.Most times,women are the cause of their problems.You might have offended him without knowing and he finds it very difficult to forgive you.Search yourself very well,the answer to your problem might be in your hands.

His wife offended him and the best he could do was to cheat and abuse everyone ?? How is his attitude going to solve the problem?

What happened to communication?

Really sad..

Your husband behaves like one who's frustrated ... Do you think he maybe having some challenges?

For both husband and wife to offer you such nonsense shows the kinda person you're ... it's not surprising that you're considering doing it... mtcheeew

I hope you'll be alive to tell the story. .

wacoj:
My brother you are not very correct.
I once tried to use this approach to register my annoyance to my wife, immediately i rejected the food, she just gave me a HEAVY hiss, very long one and took the food back to the kitchen. When i remembered what hunger might do to me later, I went for the food myself after all na my money.

Woman no go kill me.

I know this isn't funny but ehhhhh

It's well man, hope you're both settled now?

buksaylor001:
My wife is so wicked that it doesn't even affect any bit of her no matter what you do-infact she swims in quarrels.That is her sweetest mood when she is quarreling with me,she is just a devil!

Hello, you don't have to say all these about your wife... I really doubt if anyone enjoys quarrel with their loved ones. ...

Find her soft button and make her come around. ... I hope you both find peace...

Whatever decision you make, don't get pregnant again without a proper marriage. . All d best...

Eketem:
Again I ask what is the significance of this in modern day? Our fore fathers did it for a reason, why are we still doing it?

Brideprice may not be of any significance, I agree... but saying it's a justifiable reason to why some men treat women as properties is just so absurd. ..

So because he paid some amount of money to some elders in your village, your rights as human have been stripped? He has completed acquired you and can treat you anyhow he deems fit? Really don't get you. .. not like anyone forced him to pay whatever . .. Brideprice in some places is as low as #100, so

A man who loves and respects you would treat you right regardless of how much he spends for your marriage rites. .. PLEASE LADIES, ANY MAN THAT FEELS HE CAN TREAT YOU ANYHOW HE WISHES BECAUSE OF SOME BRIDEPRICE YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT DOESN'T LOVE YOU. .PLEASE DON'T MARRY SUCH A MAN

Then, about abolishing brideprice. .go to a village and talk about that, the men are even the ones that oppose it, saying they paid brideprice to marry their wives so their in laws must pay brideprice too... if men are burdened by brideprice, they know what to do!

Considering your marriage, you were lucky to marry a good man and not cos he didn't pay your brideprice. ..

Creamish:
@bolded.... Surrogacy takes care of it.

Noo, mine won't be outsourced oo.. will have my kids myself

joseph1832:
The bride price is not for my mum (women) so why should she return it? Lol.

I'm not saying it makes you the tail, I'm only saying such role as head of the family usually subject the woman to being dominated.

Leadership doesn't equate the super imposition of who is head, and who is tail, or who is in the middle. It equates the first of the first: Selflessness How many men of today to be selfless towards their wife's and kids, how many men today will put their wive first before them?.

You're right. . Those ones don't understand who a leader is especially as it concerns the family setting. ..

Marry your friend and lover.... and you wouldn't feel dominated or whatsoever. Both of you just flow... it's well...

chizeal:
May her soul rest in God's bossom, pls, wot is my dues oo ND how do I pay it? Pls kindly add me to d team September....

Our team captain will add your name when she returns. . Guess she'll be absent for a while as she lost her mom

For your dues, share baskets of tomatoes and tankers of fuel to all d mamas here

Welcome dear

joseph1832:
However, I'll tell you that when my sisters got married, the amount my parents collected was N10,000 and my dad, in everybody's presence, returned the money to there husbands. Each time, my father's words were "My daughter is not for sale".

In a family I don't believe in the need to identify one as head, and another as tail! To me, what matter is the notion that "we are one" and we function as one indivisible unit, united as one and with one goal.

@bolded word....Exactly, what I'm talking about.. it lies mostly on the men(fathers) to either collect or reject bride price .. I doubt if your mum would have had the power to return the brideprice

My husband being the head doesn't make me the 'tail' as you put it... I'm a christian hence I subscribe to headship as directed by Christ... it doesn't mean we don't function as one, infact we live like siblings. ..
Also, for a group to function effectively, there must be some kinda leadership, like someone who calls the shots, this he does with others' interests at heart too...
In the midst of siblings, the older siblings tend to guide/control to ensure orderliness. ..

My idea of husbands' headship is entirely different from master-slave relationship. ..

jadelyn007:
I tire o! Very childish thing I tell you!

My sister, these young men complaining today are the fathers/uncles/elders who turn out tomorrow to 'kill' their in laws with huge bride price/demand...
Ask any of these men complaining on nairaland whether they would reject their daughters' bride price tomorrow, all of them will go mute

All they do is blame the woman without knowing the solution lies with them. .. Most women know nothing about how bride price is fixed or collected. ..

soonest:
It's safe in second trimester. The sulfadoxine+Pyrimethamine aspect inhibits folate synthesis but it's not significant enough to cause malformation in 2nd trimester. Tk care

Thanks dear, really appreciate

misreal:
gbaaaammmm!!!i like this response so much..truth is,when a man spends a million naira on a woman's bride price he owns you.if you want to be a modern lady,please be a total modern lady and stop the collection of bride price,if possible sponsor your own wedding.

You're a clown ... Can we also say that women who sponsor their weddings own their husbands

Talk about bride price, who fixes the amount Who collects the money when paid No be men?
You men are the one that fix and collect bride price, so why complain? Also, For bride price to be scrapped, men (the elders) must be in support ...

So why all this fuss about bride price as if na d woman dey chop d money

if you say men are the head of the home, I agree..or say couple own each other as a virtue of the marriage institution, I agree too... not the property-owner thingy you just described...

Better still, I will even say they both have 'bought' each other life

Hey mamas, is farenax (artesunate+sulfadoxine+Pyrimethamine) safe in second trimester? Was given this cos of malaria 1+

The drug inhibits the production of folic acid, hope my lo won't suffer FA deficiency during the period of taking this drug? Also read that the drug causes fetal malformation in first trimester, if it can do this in first trimester, that means it may still have some adverse effects in second trimester

Cc thorpido , kaffy4bill , soonest , and other sabi mamas..
Thanks.

@ sugah , my condolences dear.. may she find rest in the Lord and may God give your family the fortitude to bear the loss.. it's well..

Jamean:
like child bearing

.. this one can't be shared or outsourced o...

Your description is a typical example of partnership in marriage, the marriage just flows...

However, I won't say that gender-role division has been completed eliminated because even as my husband can cook, I take up the role most of the times. .. then, I don't repair the Generator ettcc...some roles are still seen as gender-specific but couples should be able to take up any role if need be..

Have a good day dear

Just marry your friend and all these roles bla bla wouldn't apply. .. the marriage just flows... You do (almost) everything together. ... Each person uses his/her brain and knows just what to do at every point in time....

Husband seeks your opinion before making any decision.....anyone can take up any role ettccc...

wroskian:
Chai!!!...see as you comot the guy banner

Lol ...

Have you ever wondered how your wife copes?? Or you think her 'situation' is so pleasing to her?

You just have to be supportive the best way you can; you're in it together. .

My dear, there's no passion in anything that can't pay your bills... Almost all our struggles are targeted towards achieving a more comfortable life hence if your job can't pay your bills, the 'passion' will most likely die off...

There maybe passion at first but with time, it wears off !!!

LastMumu:
[color=#000099] I'm fine. This is one of those days I wish I was on leave, at home, on my bed snuggling with one hot big batty babe... ...ojigbijigbijigbi.

paroman AKA friedplantain AKA lastmumu, I salute ooo

@ sugah, it's well with your mum ..the surgery will be a success, Amen.

Congrats Gaily04 , I'm specifically happy for you, love d way you dey 'jinger' .. God bless your lil prince

Seriously, nothing good has come out of this government. . Really pathetic. ..

Other countries are reducing their PMS prices but here we're increasing ours

The masses just keep suffering. ..

And he's even talking about increasing fed uni school fees

Can't count just ONE thing this govt has done so far esp as it relates to the masses. . Mtcheeew

^^^^^ , mitchyy .... if you can manage till July, good... after then you can using your new born as excuse

Beautiful baby... wish her an awesome future. .

If you can make hair very well, why not? Esp as you're currently jobless (I presume)...Use your 'MSc brain' to find creative ways of making your business the best. ..

If a better opportunity presents itself tomorrow, you can get someone to run the business for you...

polymathic:
This is deep!!!!

#MyOpinion

Sir, I believe you should be bold enough to relay this message to your wife. I know she won't take it lightly with you but I just believe telling her the whole truth will do a lot and help save your marriage.

She will get angry and say a lot of things, even pack out of the house if possible.. But if truly she's a virtous woman, she will focus on making her home...

What exactly do you mean by the bolded? Who's a virtuous woman? .. will you say same to a man if tables were turned?

Op is the one you're supposed to be preaching to about making his home and mending fences. .

Op, you have to tell your wife...you can't hide it for long esp as a baby is involved. .. Sincerely plead to her and ask for forgiveness. .. Together you can plan a way forward, HOPEFULLY. ...

Yeah, I married someone I share same values with..say 90%......

Can't be attracted to the opposite. ..

leverage12:
This Sunday, her birthday I give her an engagement ring

Beautiful, wish you guys the best..

The question is what and who does she chat with??

What's wrong if a married woman chats till that time?? So once you're married, you've become a different person or what? It's now a taboo to chat in d night As far as the chat doesn't disrupt any activity, then why not? ? You even said she does it when you are both apart showing maybe she's always bored or idle. .. You guys just make marriage look like a prison, mtcheeew. .

Sometimes I chat with sisters and friends abroad up till that time. .

Then, some married women chat on nairaland in the night, probably when they hv time or baby is awake and they're trying to keep themselves busy...

Again, Who and what does she chat? That's the question. .. Does any of the chats point to infidelity?

Anyway, since you ain't comfortable with it, talk to her about it... all d best...