₦airaland Forum

ambient:
Kai,nne' you are too soft,my house is jokingly refered to as. Teenage camp because I have them all in my house,you see that your cousin,no matter what you do you must always be termed a bad person so why don't you damn everything and treat his Bleep up.never you show your weakness to a teenager or you are finish.chai nne I wish you are my friend make i help you.

Haha, I'll give them a week at your camp. They need it.

Bukky001:
The only advice I can give is about your laptop. Change your password and they won't have access to it again.... Good luck *but you too soft Sha*

Me? I beat them until people started treating me like I was crazy. Still, they acted like nothing happened. In other words 'odeshi' which means 'you're wasting your time.' They only tremble when the men in the house start to bellow at them.

My password, they will still find that one out. You know what happened with my phone? They come to put on the hotspot there too, and when i changed the password, I met my phone locked. They had tried to get the password so many times that the phone finally locked itself.

Its all good though. I believe they will grow and mature, even if their behavior right now is so painful to me.

This post is just my way of letting off steam. It is truly not easy to take care of teenagers. Those who have teenagers they care for can probably relate, and those who do not can have an inkling of what its like.

I am a senior sister and second mother to my 14 year old youngest brother, and 15 year old male cousin. They are such characters that they each deserve their own section. Here goes:

Troublesome Teenager Number 1, My 15 year old Cousin: I love my cousin, but he is a serious case. When he came to live with my family, I resolved not to touch him or discipline him extensively. People staying with others tend to bring up accusations of abuse, anything you do to them is attributed to the fact that they are not your immediate family. As a result, I and my brothers handle him like an egg.

The boy took ample advantage of this. From being sullen and disciplined, he became very wild. Many times he would take offence to the slightest correction. He also goes out when he likes, picks whatever he wants from the kitchen and watches movies on my laptop from dawn till dusk. Answers me back as he likes from time to time. My brothers are his role models but if I correct him, that's where the problem lies. I think he feels I cannot and should not tame him. The funniest thing he ever did was starting to act up after he was told that the only reason I was not touching him was so as not to create issues between his mom and us. He became bolder and even tried to deepen his already deepening voice.

Whenever his mom comes around, he turns me to his enemy. He starts to perpetuate the notion that he is a victim of abuse. The last time his mom was around, he started shouting at me at his whim and when I got angry one day and slapped him, his mother finally made him a celebrated hero. She almost took him home by midnight that day, because the image of an abused boy that she wanted so badly had finally been portrayed to her.


Troublesome Teen Number 2, my 14 year old brother: I love my little brother as well. I tried to raise him like people raise kids abroad. Talking to him gently when he misbehaves, explaining to him, punishing by taking things away or just small reprimands....

That shii didn't work. He became the most troublesome little boy I knew. Whenever his friends are around, he wants to show off to them by talking over me, ignoring my demands. I started to discipline him but before long, he knew how to run to the neighbors house, taking the cane from me, and running outside where the discipline would become a spectacle. Sometimes he even yells at me too. He has tried to beat a few adults who tried to beat him. But they gave him a good beating

Since when he was small, 'he wants what he wants.' If I don't give him something, sometimes he would go and take it. Sometimes I would catch him. Time and time again, even with warnings, things still disappear at will.

When any kid around him is being bad, he wants to do two times what that kid is doing, and be loved for it. He feels that is love. From the time that my cousin came around, and we told him that we cannot touch our cousin, else it would be termed as abusing a family member from another mother.....he has taken it as proof of love that however we pardon our cousin, we must pardon him. He copies what our cousin does, does worse, and always defends himself with the fact that we leave our cousin, we dont spare him.

Now we have come to the last part, my experience with these two kids combined...


The Terrible Two: The two of them constantly answer me back, laugh and joke and even encourage me to come and punish them. They feel no amount of beating from me can break them, maybe because I am a woman. However, they have full fear and respect for the males around them. If i try to talk to them they act as if someone or something insignificant is talking. Few times though, they try to calm the wild spirits inside them, and behave.

Things still disappear at home, and even if we are the only ones at home, they both co operate and deny everything. The co operate to disrespect me. They start joking and laughing right after I'm done with my long warnings or advice talks. They tell me to come and punish them, that they will enjoy the punishment. They have turned my laptop to their permanent TV, day, night and midnight, i cant use it. If i hide it, they find it, turn it on, play whatever on it as early as 5 am till 12 or 1 on weekends. They put games there, got a game pad and play till thy kingdom come, all without my consent. They don't answer me, they do what they like when they like.

They are only tame at school. These are not kids that are meek. These are tall versions of Aki and Pawpaw that are already as tall as me at the moment.


This morning, my mom called me and told me that handling these teens is all about patience.

If you have had difficulties with teens, you can talk about your experience, to make this more interesting and educative. If you were a troublesome or troubled teen, you can also share.

Ciao!

I don't care what anyone has to say. That's a stinking attitude from that girl. She is so mean, and many females act in that stupid unpleasant manner.

meobizy:
This girl again? Those are old pictures. The girl don fat now. If you see her, you'll tell her to pay you instead. I don't know why these Nairaland boys always think with their pee pees instead of their brains.

Being fat isn't bad now . Fat girls are fine and deserve the same attention.

Anyway, he really should report to the police and let them handle the matter, plus posting pics of the criminal. He could be sued for demamation of character.

Nicepoker:
Correction accepted.

Who is the person?

Please borrow money or sell that phone. Just give him back his money.

Afterwards don't ever let him come close to you. Also call a family meeting, let them know his threats. Let a peace meeting be arranged or they will decide if you should go to the police. Your life or Virginity is in danger.

Second picture....i was like WOW. Your look beautiful there. Don't know how but you do look kinda beautiful.

You could grow a moustache.

Nicepoker:
One claimed she is in University of Abuja. I did some findings. I am telling you this vagina creature never sat for WAEC. Exams.

Hmm.

thebosstrevor1:
Beret is western...most Christian schools use beret

Hijab is Islamic.

If a Muslim girl says she doesn't want to wear a beret then she should be allowed to wear a hijab

Why can't she go to a Muslim school to do that?

If a christian cannot open her hair in a Muslim school , why would a Muslim break the rules of a Christian school.

omaclarry:
i dont have money, will u consider me for a romantic relationship?

Having money or not having money is not the only requirement for a relationship, so this cannot be a yes or no question. However I've stated earlier that if a guy meets my requirements without money, why not.

bmdmix1:
he was trying to feel it soft or hard.

so is it soft or hard

Hmm yaff spoil finish

bmdmix1:
the same ass u are showing us on ur NL profile shey

Lol so?

StacyO:
I had same experience.

The guy called and told me that he now have a car, a house and is living really big. Lol


Who ask you??

Like who ask them true true...

Infact .....wetin consine me?

thereals:
Wtf?!?! The ass rubbing dude is disaster

Yep. Wouldn't stop going there even when I shift.

Raalsalghul:
You are still being coy: was expecting a "Yes or No" answer.

Yes

A surgery would get it removed. If he loses the finger it's due to infection.

Kept trying to rub my ass. Told me if I said I've been with one or two guys, that I'm just starting, there are more to come. What a wicked statement.

Can't remember how he did it, made me feel so repulsed....but when I came home I puked out the malt he bought me and had a bad headache. That was really long ago.

The worst experience I think I myself gave someone was when I poured my drink all over the table at an eatery and we had to change tables and everyone was looking at us.

Humanoid01:
I've always known you to be among the sensible ladies on this forum. You made good points and your response to the first guy was mature. Kudos! You write so well too.

Thank you so much. I appreciate you for appreciating me.

Raalsalghul:
The question was directed at "you" and not "other women".

If I have to start small with someone broke, that's just life. We will grow together.

tosaino95:
You're trying to play smart but ain't get time for that...

Lol that's the problem...I'm not trying to 'play'.

It's not a game. It should not be considered a game.

tosaino95:
Don't you want Sex i understand love is not all about sex but love,affection and sex are together.

Sex should come into the picture last.

BabbanBura:
You made some points here, hope sha u know say when time over-reach parents no dey choose again?

Its a really selfish move by parents... Wasting their daughter's youth because of their preferences. Its also futile when at the end, when she is old, they would still agree to a man from another tribe. Its really sad cuz they just waste a life away.....for nothing. A girl they could have allowed since....waste her time ...then she would get married and be struggling to give birth in old age.

You know the worst.. Most of them would still blame the daughter for getting married late.

Toks2008:
This is why ladies are advised to get something doing, a hand job or business so that they won't become a total liability

For people quoting me and writing what comes to their heads please go and read my comments again.

You people should save me the talks of triplets not allowing her do any other thing.

If there was an existing business or job before now I'm sure this guy won't be wailing.

The Nigeria system is bad enough, please ladies, get something doing before ever bringing a child into this world whether as a married lady or single woman.

Lol, the only way you would stop running your opinions is if you give birth to not one but three, see how that feels first. Then have kids suck from your breast and wail to be comforted day and night and midnight. Then bathe and clothe and change them every few hours.

But because you stand gidigba with balls, no weakness in your body, you never thought of how it is for the woman. With the maxi pad on with she will be bleeding after birth, and the kids who don't understand anything but she must take care of them whether she is sick, weak or strong, you want her to go out and work.

My mother was working after the birth of our last born. Her customers couldn't care less. She nearly DIED due to the stress.

You are only thinking of your gender, you are INSENSITIVE!

Even if she has work, she should continue it after birth?! Even sane countries realize and give women maternity leave! Why are you wicked and your heart is like stone! Is it a woman's fault that you were born a man? Did she punish him because she had to birth children? Why are you trying to punish women because your role is to go out and work?! Why are you bitter because it is your work as a man!!!

ArisingStorm:
Your post and your words are cool. Such is rare especially in Nigeria. If you are indeed what your words portray, You are a rare and cool being.

However, I wouldn't blame anyone for not believing in love, many have pass through terrible experiences, many innocent young men have been deceived and same as women. Nigeria is a harsh environment where survival seems to be a priority, I wouldn't blame ladies that are just trying to survive(tho it is immoral), and men whose mindset has been configured that it is all about money. I can't blame anyone, To live like a normal and sane human in Nigeria takes grace.

Keep spreading the true message of love and affection.

Thanks, I will.

peacefull:
Thank you so much for caring about me!
I appreciate you!

I just confusing
Seems like not good for talking about love.

I can't ignore If I ignore, not rude?
I have time today! So I can have time for discussion!
Always good to me for hearing other person's opinion. I can learn

But I'm sorry if I'm disturbing your topic too much.
I'm apologies you.

I just didn't know that talking about love and money is maybe not good.
I learned! I maybe better to talk about that only on my diary.

In fact, most of times I don't talk about or discussion about love in my real life.
Because I know some peoples laugh at me or think about I'm a childish.

If believing love made me childish, I'm gladly be childish

Oh talk as much as you like here...I really don't mind . I just didn't want you to be stressed.

Believing in love is fine, its not childish dear.

peacefull:
What is meaning which heart?
Women are also human. I have heart, emotions, feeling etc.
I'm not robot.

You think giving money is showing love?
To me, relationship is not all about money.
I know money is very important.
But love and money is different things to me.
Not always money first.

How I wished I can explain about my opinion very well in English.

Please, if someone believe love, is it something wrong in Nigeria?
Someone who can't think money is first, is that something wrong?
Must think like money first?

I'm very confusing.

Don't let them disturb you dear. You can ignore if you keep getting mentioned. That's just the way a lot of our men think.