₦airaland Forum

Was that before or after the APC government sponsored terrorism to get into power?

Even if a minor propositions you for sex, turn them down o. The law protects them, they are not of legal age to give consent.

A word is enough for the wise.

macrodata:
Quite frankly, 3 years is such a long time. The doctor assured me my wife will be able to have sex after 2 weeks or 3! It took 5 months before we could resume sex. Please visit a gynecologist.

2 to 3 weeks after birth?

QorQe:
.. I don't disagree. But there's no love in this relationship. This one clear to see, so what's with the whole managemental doctrine, when the primary thing love is lacking.

Many marriages these days is lacking in love and that's why money causes issues.

People marry these days and don't disclose how much they earn.

Still, it is still a manageable situation. All it takes is understanding.

QorQe:
Many Nigerian males need help in home and people management. They may be well developed in other areas, but I've come to notice rather sadly that many guys lack tact in interpersonal relations with wife's family etc. I'm a Pro so I know. I manage the interactions between as much as five families. So I know when a man lacks it. This one lacks it. The wife to needs counselling to overcome " self ", the man here is too self absorbed.


My question is why do you all go ahead to marry yourselves when you can't tolerate one another or even like one another. Why?

The best person to counsel her is an older woman who isn't her parent.

Nigerian women have dealt with Nigerian men the way they are, as unrefined and undeveloped in some areas.

There will be more trouble if his wife's busines fails due to poor financial management and since he invested in the business, e no go funny. Her being too emotional might contribute to her business failing and to me o, unless on grounds of infidelity or domestic abuse, you should not leave your matrimonial home.

The wife obviously misunderstood the husband when he said he didn't want to use his eyes to see her.

Biglittlelois:
Your first comment is you being sarcastic really? That is your defense? The counseling you told the wife to seek is that also sarcasm?

I said I wasn't being sarcastic. I actually meant what I said. It wasn't sarcasm. My previous comment is that I didn't mean it to be sarcastic.

I'm surprised you think it is.

chatinent:
I don't mince words either, but I am very careful when it's marriage that's involved.

A little sarcasm can ruin a prospective promising marriage...and you'll be behind your computer not knowing what you've done.

I wasn't being sarcastic and I didn't think my comment was divisive of his marriage.

His wife seeking counselling isn't a bad idea, is it?

chatinent:
You are too blunt!

Therapists aren't this blunt so they wouldn't be giving one party a basis to feel right against the other when the aim is to make things right.


You must learn to be neutral as though you have heard from both sides, rather than being too outspoken.

You are welcome.

Have a nice century.

It's a flaw I'm trying to work on.

It's both been a strength and a weakness but then, I am not a therapist.

Your wife is financially, emotionally and psychologically immature.

The moment you get married, trivial issues should be settled and if there's miscommunication, it's best to seek clarity.

She needs proper counselling from someone she respects, preferably an older woman that's not her parent.

MODIFIED

Leaving the house and calling her father over an issue that could have been resolved is very wrong. You claimed she's not good with finances so it's obvious it's a flaw of hers and I understand you're trying to help her.

Your error is that you should have waited till you got home before talking about the apprentice and why she didn't collect money.

Small thing like that you told her you didn't want to see her, she now misunderstood it to mean she should leave.

Miscommunication.

She needs counselling sha, financially, emotionally and psychologically. No be everything go make you call your papa leave your marital home.

Leave her alone.

Kingstanding:
. Not cut na bruised. Guilble fellow.

I don't understand the "gullible fellow" comment.

More like "Man of the Century".

No be cut be this?

That looks more like a cut sha.

Those familiar with bullet wounds should please, analyse.

Let's just keep it that way please.

Kandeed:
All these can be said under 20min

It's not enough to say it. But to lay down a template and see to it.

Kai.

Things is we don't even know what is coming out of you cause according to the scan, the gestational sac is still intact and it's too early to see an embryo till around 7 or 8 weeks.

I doubt that any doctor will give you medication knowing that the gestational sac is still intact but go to the doctor and open up. Don't lie or hide anything.

After this, please, repent. This might be the close call or rock bottom you need to turn your life around.

Good luck.

dairykidd:
Na wah.. so na the well to do women be the contract now

Yes o. Life time contract.

truthsayer009:
Are you sure you are not the Aunty? Since you live in Abuja, the story sounds so believable because that's how Abuja men behave

I got married last year sir. It can't be me. I look well before I marry.

pocohantas:
You sabi. Go to Abuja offices and you will see them in senator material and cap, walking upandan like penguins. I wonder why babes still fall for them. Stage 2 is always to tell you of one imaginary project that needs financing. The babe go wan form virtuous woman (a different kinda Naija woman). Naso Jonah go take swallow the fish.

My dear, I've been in Abuja for close to 25years.

We Sabi them

dairykidd:
Lool.. all these stories are very funny

My dear, Abuja contractors, them plenty for street looking for a woman to be a mummy to them and a father of the children they'll have.

BluntCrazeMan:
(@Bolded)

They can still discuss it after settling this present issues..
This is not something that must be discussed only during Courtship.

To avoid issues, it should be discussed o. Cause someone might be strongly against the bill sharing. I know someone suffering it now. He could be dying and his wife will boldly tell people "her money is not for public use".

It should be discussed to avoid stories o.

Vision101:
@Romanoff
You think women are not?

Why do you think some have numerous suitors?

Na to choose the one wey good pass na.


@me
Numerous suitors in this period of scarcity of husband? My dear majority are fake. Many are suitors but majority are fake.

Same for the men.

The cheating stories says it all.

kazyhm:
You're just justifying her unruly attitude.......what happened to her working on her marriage to gain her husband's trust ?

You didn't read in my first comment where I told OP to make adjustments.

Adjustments here is for him to open up how much she earns to his wife and he needs to educate his wife on the need for her to open up on her own finances for better planning of the home.

If they had discussed this before marriage and she broke the agreement, it's a different thing.

But there was no agreement to start with and I'm saying it's not too late to start one.

But they will both need to be open with their finances.

kazyhm:
You would put in charge of your finance someone husband who gifted his ex part of his first earning while quarreling you about the disclosure of your monthly earning ? Even though you provides his basic daily needs.

That's why I said the foundation is faulty from start. This is what should have been discussed during courtship. And it shouldn't be that both have to submit all their salaries. A simple joint account for family projects, who pays what bill, etc will sort things out.

Each person can still have personal savings, only that percentages will be put in the family account and each person has what bill they are paying.

Note that chores should also be shared.

That's why I said a lot should be discussed in courtship before marriage to avoid conflicts and resentments.

Sis, you're dating a married man.

kazyhm:
I beg to differ. Telling your wife your monthly take home does not always result in prudent planning.......do you as a productive business individual and a prudent spender need to know how much you'll earn at the end of the month to spend judiciously and share what you have with your family ?

Bottom line is she selfish, entitled and lack common sense.

The op married the wrong person.......

How much does she contribute to her husband productivity for her to be demanding the information about his pay ?

One thing I can deduced from this one sided story is that she married him because of his stable job else she would still be on the street fukking every dicck and harry......and if op is slightly out of job.....the marriage won't last a month.......so what's the essence of the union ?

If y'all don't know how much you earn individually, it is not a marriage.

You both should know how much you earn so you both can plan your lives.

Take it or leave it.

If you open your eyes and marry someone who isn't prudent, it doesn't mean you both can still not plan your finances. The most prudent amongst you will just be in charge of the finances.

Reex12:
Indeed i agree nice input
btw did you get ur nickname from the avengers

I'm a huge fan.

Reex12:
lol perhaps you view such situation as in third person narrative...now romanoff (natasha lol) you get married to a man that you know that doesnt love you,shows sign that he doesnt regard you..and also you on the other hand knows fully well that you dont love your husband but live in the same house with him would still want to spend the rest of your life with him pls be honest

That's why I said mutual respect must be in the union.

Anyone who marries someone that doesn't have any regard or respect for them had dug their grave already.

You think women are not?

Why do you think some have numerous suitors?

Na to choose the one wey good pass na.

Reex12:
point of correction why stay in a marriage when theres no love whats the point then? it a companypartnership? the woman doesnt love him, disrespects him to be sending money to her lov4ers so whats the point of the marriage

It has worked in the past and I've seen it work, though in rare cases. All that matter in this instance is respect for each other, respect for the marriage covenant and communication.

Reex12:
no adjustment to make here the woman simply does not love him..let him disembark bfor kids enter

I don't think that's the case. Many have stayed in loveless marriages that worked.

I feel with communication, things can be remedied.