₦airaland Forum

Sagamite:
The is part of the cons (risks) of marriage.

Now for some ediot to come here and now be spewing rubbish that marriage is just fantastic and then call himself "Analytical" annoys the hell off me.

What is the cons in what i have typed??is it the forming good wife aspect how do you expect a woman or man to protect herself or himself in a marraige?

Coogar you are so funny, my hubby's best man is his brother ooo, and that guy fine die!!!! ( no go area).

How will i sit back and watch my hubby washing undies God forbid, if he sees some chores that needs to be done and he is helping out, infact i will be loving him more because he has just reduced my burden.

I have a friend here whose hubby does the cleaning, she does not know how to vacuum, can you believe that her hubby cleans, washes the bathrooms, (he just loves cleaning the house) but he will never ever ever !! enter the kitchen, so if the woman is cooking and sleeping on the stove she knows that is her duty and would be doing with all the strength she has left. So it all boils down to understanding.

moremi2008:
My dear Ronkis, you can't eat your cake and have it too. You can't expect a man to kill himself outside the home to provide for the family and then return home to help with the housework and babies. If both spouses are working, then they should seriously consider hiring help. I am a single guy and I have a cleaning lady come in every week. Married couples should also do the same (they aren't that expensive in the US). I have married Nigerian friends that employ full-time nannies for about $1k-$2k per month. It saves them a LOT of hassle and their marriages are better for it.

That is where understanding plays a part, it would be a big help if they can be reasoning this way, if both spouses are working, they should definitely get a help, it would reduce the strain on their relationships and help with more time they would be spending together as a couple.

Citing a case of an ideal woman,!!!!!! do you know how many women that could be ideal too, but has been turned to who they because of circumstances, now i dey form good girl and good wife, do you think i will continue forming if he starts to maltreat me for where?

Ok Coogar, i am back, say what?? what were you saying?? comparing nigerian women work and the people in diaspora, you still cannot compare oooo, Nigerians get a lot of cheap helps and even help from family members, imagine how a woman who has just put to bed in Nigeria is being cared for, peppersoup for one side, another person caring for the baby on the other side, another woman bathing for the mother on another end, the woman's own is to sleep and feed the baby whenever she can gan sef ni.

But in America, infact i started bathing my baby the second day after i left the hodpital, thank God for small change, we were able to get a cleaning lady, who wants to be spending and wasting money ontop cleaning lady,( by the time you add how much you are payiong her every two weeks, one will rethink it) i had a baby sitter when i resumed back at work, my mum was not happy at all because of the stress here when she came to visit, it looked like the country has been set up that way to stress people out, even my dad gan sef, was like i was stressing my self too much,  Despite say i still get hubby that helped, imgine not getting a helping hand atall and then you have a hubby that bosses you around at every little thing, common now, we are all human beings abegiii

Coogar i will be right back to give you your reply in regards to the work here and the work back home.

armyofone:
Ofc most of the women are grateful. I think when the men start behaving like bush men, beating, refusing to join in housework etc then there is trouble.

the stress of working 40hrs plus is not funny.

my dear if it was just 40hrs work e for better, imagine working and doing overtime, caring for the children and family at large, some will see it as big deal!!!! but they really do not have an idea, no one can do it all, we all need help at one point in time, all these wahala tells on the body.

moremi2008:
Ronke, the men are st'pid and selfish to think that they "own" their wives. However, there is something to be said for loyalty and gratitude. Women that come from their villages to the US and then think they are too good and special to stay with their husbands are not exactly saints, especially not if they leave their husbands for richer men.

Don't be deceived Moremi, that is usually not the case oooooo, some Naija men are mean and evil, if you see misbehaviours, you would be so surprised, i really think it has to do with upbringing, because i really do not know how men will grow-up to be monsters and expect another fellow human being to respect and love you back in return.

Some women lack the proper upbringing too and lack manners, but majority of the men are just nothing to write home about.

Coogar, when men (Nigerian men -some though) start to appreciate the wives they have and not treat them as secondclass citizens in their own houses, they will be having good marraiges, as long as they want to remain with the '' i am the man and what i say and do is law'', then their arses will always be dumped.

I have an uncle, he used to leave in the States and he is back to Nigeria now (and that is one in a million), i can not explain the type of respect he accords his wife and children, the woman is the breadwinner, the man works too but the wife makes more than him, but you can never know, the woman adores her husband, loves her husband and does double shift for her husband to be able to build his house back home, i am so serious, if you see the mansion that was built for the husband back home, many people call her a fool even her family memebers, but she was willing to do that for her hubby because she felt her husband deserved it.

You don't expect to treat a woman like shit and expect her to revere you or hold you in high-esteem in return, respect begats respect.

@ HG!!! Pele na small -small!

Logs for yesterday, 30 minutes zumba dance.

coogar:
how so?
a man went to naija to marry - brought a wife to the states - trained her to the point of her making 6-figures and then she starts misbehaving cos her levels don change? that's cheating!

Oh!!!!! BUT IT IS GOOD FOR THE MEN, TO MALTREAT THE WOMEN BECAUSE THEY WERE BROUGHT FROM THEIR VILLAGES? THIS IS NOT ABOUT EDUCATING ONE, WHICH MONEY DID THEY USE IN PAYING FOR THE SCHOOL IN THE FIRST PL;ACE?? NO BE STUDENT LOAN? THEY CAN'T EAT THEIR CAKES AND STILL WANT TO HAVE IT, I SAID IT BEFORE AND WILL KEEP SAYING IT, EYE DON OPEN, WE NEED TO BE MUCH MORE RESPONSIBLE IN ALL OUR DEALINGS ESPECIALLY MARITALLY, WHO IS A SLAVE OR A MONEY MAKING MACHINE, SO THAT SOME GUYS CAN ENJOY THEIR LIVES, EVERYBODY BOTH MAN AND WOMAN NEED AN UPGRADE. IF YOU RESPECT YOURSELF YOU WILL DEFINITELY BE RESPECTED.

coogar:
nigerians in america don suffer o. . . . .jeeeeeez.
this is what naija men in america go through? part of me wants to relocate to houston!

they caused it themselves, overflowing testosterone.

Too bad for him, witches will gather at his home for fiesta.

why not buy mortar and pistle, is that not the best??

creative.

Sagalulu!!! that article is so true!!!!! Naija men, when u are in America behave like the americans, or else you will be dumped by your wife. behave yourselves and stop chasing everything in skirts or abusing your wives, infact upgrade yourselves too not only your wives( educationally).

I can see the fatal rolling dollar guy gat swagger

coogar:
he is about 120 yrs old.

oooooohhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

dayokanu:
Ronke

Didnt you hear that fatai Rolling Dollars recently scored with one 24yr old girl?

And who is that

******peeping****** **** :

somebody refused to answer my questions.

Maclatunji, what we need help for in order to help Perx is more donations, as you can see from the account the money on hand is not enough to pay for the surgeries, The case has not been closed yet, we still need more people to donate and help in assisting her, We are all here to assist her  and that is what we all should be doing.

Perx needs money, for all the surgeries, no one knows how much the family have raised, no one knew when she actually went into the hospital until she told us herself, ours' is to support her in prayers and give her our own contribution as a team and wish her a very safe recorvery.

chaircover:
Youve been watching too much Hustle -[s] oooohhhhhhh just had to go hmmmmmmm just thinking about Mr Lester[/s]

Ronke which kain bidding be dis?

infact she is no longer available jare. . . . .I withdraw the Item from the auction

ROFLMAO

dayokanu:
CC and Ronke what of me?
CC give her to me, I have been asking you for long

I thought you have retired, despite this your old age, you are still looking for many many things, abi you want to be using agbo to perform niii?

ThiefOfHearts:
delusional

chaircover, I dont know what your sister did to you but to punish her like this is really unfair.  

Give her to dayokanu so he can stopp sniffing the panties of every woman on NL. I beg you.

chaircover:
Waoh Ronke!!! see how the vultures have descended

Shebi you guys have plenti plenti money abi!!! Ok whoever comes up with a White Range Rover Evoque & a plot of land on Banana Island gets her

Its worth it o! the girl hot die

And who is bidding Going 1, going 2 (ringing the bell) it looks as if Saga is going to have it all, going,

jay bee:
What are you guys sharing?
Madam CC, i'm also available and i'm in the For marriage camp

Dodo-kiire and fanta,

chaircover:
LOL my sister is not like me o! She will whip Saga black and blue till mucos comes out of his ears. From frog jump to stoop down. By the time she is finished with him saga will be crying for his mummy

[s]Saga dont even think of making a rude comment [/s]

Naso!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ThiefOfHearts:
[b]ronke and chaircover, any reason why you two are pressed for Sagamite and co to claim marriage?[/b]Na by force?

abi is it a "misery loves company" type of situation cos Im utterly confused.

My dear we are trying to save a soul!!!!!

ronkebp:
@ Sagalu, if i ask you a question will you answer me candidly?

In other words, you might not answer, then i will not ask  you.

@ Sagalu, if i ask you a question will you answer me candidly?

Sagamite:
You are sexist!

You should have also used "not woman enough".

Ahhhhh!!!! and i thought i was not being partial.