₦airaland Forum

pocohantas:
I no understand, you wan give your daughter tolotolo as pet? Take your drugs o, your imaginations no be here again.

okay. I can't get a day's old turkey, so i got the egg. I placed the egg with the eggs of a turkey, she just began incubation. When my ostrich hatches, i want to give it to my daughter as a pet. Thoughts?

Choose your next words wisely as no one has the monopoly of snide remarks. It could swing both ways.

Torbez:
Go for tailoring joor... for me oo, I don't think hairdressing is ideal for a guy, except it's barbing.

Na them dey get customers pass. Forget, girls patronise guys more than they patronise their fellow ladies.

pocohantas:
Very married indeed. Na today I know your moniker?

Okay girl. I'll mention you like I use to when I need those natgeo wild stories. On the meantime, I got an ostrich's egg and placed it beside the eggs of my turkey. I'm hopeful that when it hatches, I'll make a pet out of it for my daughter. Thoughts?

pocohantas:
Oga, go ask your imaginary wife why she decided not to do something she has been doing for years. Something she did with a 5mths pregnancy, something she definitely does more times than you (I await you to also claim to do 80% of the cooking at this point). If your imaginary home is as PERFECT as you paint it, your first point of call wouldn’t be Nairaland.

You go pick her and the child indeed. Yet you no get 20k to pay caterer. Now wey fuel done cost, be like na legedesbenz you go use dey pick them. World Best Horseband.



Of course there must be a reason. We all know that if this was the reverse, you in particular would have asked WHY. Same way you asked when a lady complained of her nagging bf. You asked why he suddenly gave her money for cooking, despite her complains of not giving her since. You assumed there was more to it that she wasn’t telling. You quoted the poster with most assumptions and crowned him the most sensible and unbiased poster.

You even said if she calms down, she will enjoy her bf. Give same advice to our resident married man. Yes, there is a reason a woman who did something with 5mths pregnancy, would suddenly decide not to do it.

OP should also calm down and he will enjoy his imaginary wife.

Whatever girl. Just go get a diildo or something.

Don't allow that Uyai girl trick you. I'm very married with a beautiful daughter.

pocohantas:
Naso. I am sure you also go to the market, seeep the house and wash all clothes too.

The Good NIGERIAN Husband (Season 1)

Now to go make amends of your frivolous assumptions.

You do not have anything else to contribute/assume, hence you resort in bringing house chores to hedge your non-existential points. Go and learn.

pocohantas:
Well said. The woman cooked the damn meal in the past with pregnancy. Cooks the food he eats everyday, but because she refused to cook this particular one- some goody-two-shoes have refused to see this is beyond cooking.

That is exactly how side-chicks behave. Complain about your wife and they'll act like they are way better than her. Till you marry them of course. Cooking starts from the brain and this woman’s brain is obviously not at peace with something that happened in the last meeting.

OP should fix that. That is what I would do if he decides not to do something he has been doing with good mind before. The thread is an imaginative one, but lessons to be learned.

Assuptions will get you no where. I cook basic meals, not limited only to white rice and stew, yam, beans, anything porridge, make pounded yam, eba and semo. I only don't meddle with cooking of the soups with her 'cause i'll have to admit, she's the best i've seen.

Now to your assumptive statement, my wife and i have a mutual understanding concerning whatever goes on in the kitchen. She cooks the morning dish and i the evening. I usually pick my daughter off from school, then call my wife if she's closed from work, if she is, then i go pick her too.

I've made it a personal ritual to always cook the evening meals to relief my dear wife of her stress, so as to assist the baby in showering and those kindergarteen homeworks. It has always worked fine with us so i don't understand why you'll make assumptions to just strengthen your non-existantial point(s). Try to be unbias in your comment.

Chii59:
I'm not the one reporting my husband on a public forum, am I?

That's because you don't have a husband to report.

I'mma try just once.

I ate all my candy, got a runny tummy
My bitch came later, tryna make me happy
Felt slighted by her sight, then I puff my lighter
Her sight brought the memories, of how she took my nigger
Bitch ooze of betrayel, and I had to tell her
Took a look at my AK, 'it is now or never'
bitch look what you made of me, the vilian of it all.
dragged my last puff, i knew she had to fall
she knelt and tried to beg me, i felt my heart melting
Then i pulled her closer, she hugged and felt me beating
See what you made me bitch, the monster of it all.
Then i pulled the trigger, and she smiled a relief.

dominique:
Erica is looking so sober rn, probably wishing she can turn back the hands of time

So of us actually follow you to get the latest on bbn. Please try to be elaborate oh. Has Erica being disqualified?

cooooooks:
Ah, is this how you talk to your wife? Is that why she did not want to suffer for no gain?

Lol. Get yourself out of my thread with your frivolous assumptions. You lot have been constituting nuisance here since this thread made FP. Know when to die a matter. Mtcheew.

Chii59:
Don't bother yourself. Op is a stubborn man, and his wife is equally stubborn.
If your woman served them the first time and now says no, and you don't have her mumu button to get her to agree, then their problems goes beyond just cooking.

Type in accordance with the outputing rate of your brain. Not slower, not faster, just the equal rate.

You don't know jack shiit about my family. Sit with that and get yourself another thread.

Erica told kid that her monthly visitor came yesterday. The hormonal change and the alcohol overdose must have affected her, hence her outburst at Laycon. I think she realized her mistake, hence her moody self this morning.

The organizers will have to forgive her, else, who will be giving the sex craved viewers the entertainment they seek?

Palema007:
Wao that's deep! You hardly act like one, as a matter of fact with the way you act on this forum I used to take you for one of these "pencil trousers" boys . Lol very sorry about that.

Hope You have been able to convince your wife.

You don't need to be sorry about anything, just own your misdeed. As a matter of fact, I still wear pencil trousers. In short, I'm wearing a pencil, ragged jean with only a white singlet in church and my beautiful wife beside me is dressed in a micro mini and a crop top. Thing is, you sound like you know me here. Have we crossed paths?

My wife followed me to church today, what do you think?

E fit be say na slawormir send you that pix self, you'll then go and expose someone innocent.

Bloody scammers!

bluefilm:
All these measures for a 'disease' that has a very very very low mortality rate, if any at all?


Someone please wake me up from this bad dream.

Clearly, you do not understand the basic foundation on which English, as a language, is built on.

Joemetry:
If maintenance is gonna take over 3 months why shouldn't I be worried when Asians start and complete a massive construction project in weeks sometimes days?

Because Asian products are also chinese products.

Chinese products are terrible products.

Ajibel:
Learn qbasic then

Lol. Funny.

Na mad people full NL oh. Which one be milo and butter again?

Me even dey think say my beans, spag and yam na bad combo. Well, in the spirit, there are always higher realms.

amalab30:
I won't say my own before people think poverty started from my generation. Who has tried bread and Golden morn?

I've tried it, even bread with cornflakes. E dey sweet oh, forget.

Dyt, i just saw a meatpie reciepe on fb and no sugar in the ingredient, neither the procedures too. I asked and someone said sugar isn't added in meatpie. Is that correct? Cause if i get am wrong tomorrow, na fire oh.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Fuel tanker, hot charcoal fall on your testes there, you son of Delilah.

Lol. If you like dey here, me i don comot. We don too derail am.

Why these mods dey delete our post self. Na wa oh.

Una for here, no vex. Na my sister she be. Baby sister.

dingbang:
walahi you be trouble

Na this night i say make i test the waters. She too na person wey sabi trouble like say tomorrow no get belle.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Thunder faya you and that your imaginary wife.

You better inform me when you dey come Lag next month. Make I for prepare better Onugbu soup and fufu keep for you. I know say that Nupe girl no dey prepare better delicacy for you, na why lapa lapa don full your scalp be that.

Na yoruba i marry and yoruba no dey chop akapan-nsobu. Na confirm food wey get direct english translation i dey chop on a steady. I go come go chop wetin go hook me for throat because i no fit pronouce hin name. Nekwa nu aya oh.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Go do your findings well, you dragon.

Na soup be that? Oh. I don even forget say even ordinary garri, you no fit turn, na Ekpang-Nkukwo you wan come sabi?

And errm, I hope say you don go settle that your Nupe girl? She don give me at least hundred missed calls this week. Anu mpama.

See the name like all those classmate name for primary school wey we dey mock. Wetin be ekapan-nkwocha? Oyeberibe.

Why she no go beep you 100 times when you dey owe her 5naira since last year. Pick call, she wan add another 5naira make e make am 10naira so that you'll pay her in 50yrs time.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Oh. You no say no be me you dey follow yan. I always prepare classics.

After all, the one way Ella been dey prepare for you she leave you three months ago no reach all the ones na. Too much jab for someone that can't even boil water.

No be me help you turn eba last month when I visit you for your aunty house when you come Lag? Dey soffri follow me talk, abeg.

You dey praise yourself now? Well, agama lizard wey jump down from iroko tree go look left, turn right, if e see say nobody praise am, e go nod him head praise himself. Na wetin you dey do so oh.

I no come lag, you too lie. I get wife wey sabi cook and me sabi pound self. Even stone i go pound. Even if na true self oh, e no shame you say you wear slippers enter those yellow busses from ajegunle come V.I come turn eba go back?

UyaiIncomparabl:
Nsogbu. Biko, puta nuzo. I no really get your time. Come back to FB and let's get you a cure to your lapa lapa infested scalp already. It must have eaten deep into your brains, therefore you can't be faulted.

Mbanu. Neya like fish on land. This one pain you oh. Chai. Shey you no go invite me come chop your soup? My wife no cook for me.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Yea. I have only one pot. I know. Na me and your imaginary wife dey follow share am.

How about you send me a message on FB messenger to give you an antidote to that your lice-infested scalp since you haven't let my Whatsapp message inbox rest and have as well been disturbing me with calls. I have been busy, son. Sorry.

Lass lass i just rechecked this your soup and e no shock me say meat no dey am, only green beans. Makes me wonder if you're on a diet.

Ask me of my wife again, slay kangaroo.

GrammarNazi1:
Your wickedness is legendary.

My boss well well. Na my personal person. She don do her own for my thread, i no answer. I get her time now.

dingbang:
hey you dont call the mother of my kids uyaiincomparabl a village girl.

I hope say una kids no carry the colour of her previous soup, the one wey yellow anyhow. Dey like miyan samiya.

And she go dey house dey chop wetin she just upload now oh. Person mix stew and vegetable call am soup. I laugh in anambara, awka.

dingbang:
you see why I have to marry you

Why you no go marry her. Somebody that can manage very well? She even manages pots self. Come and see when human being will cook stew and soup in one pot seperated only by oil.

Person like that will manage your battery until they exhauts it after the last steamy round. Na village calabar girl afterall.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Ekpang-Nkukwo.

Be like say na only one pot you get.