₦airaland Forum

Nooil:
Uyi says you're a troll, maybe. But let me advise. You told your wife to cook and serve a guest of 20 when she was 5 months pregnant.

Do you know why she accepted then? She was a new bride, eager to do whatever will please her husband. But do you know the effect that cooking had on her both physically and psychologically?

Now every time she remembers that cooking, not only does she remember how you were inconsiderate in asking her to cook for such number of people with her five months of pregnancy, she probably also have shivers running down her spine when she remembers the stress she went through.

The main reason why she is refusing now is the psychological stress. She remembers the cooking as unpleasant and stressful. And she is not willing to walk that path again.

What to do?

Apologize. Let her know how sorry you are for letting her to cook when she was heavily pregnant.

Let her know that you only need her to price stuff when you go to the market.

Let her know you only need her to add the ingredients to the soup.

Let her know you'll wash the pots and plates before and after cooking.

Let her know you'll buy her Coldstone ice cream (or whatever relaxes her) after cooking.

Let her know you're too broke to afford a caterer. Talk softly to women if you need something from them.

If you're too proud, go and hire a caterer.

Uyai doesnt know a troll even if the troll is sitting opposite her.

In all honesty, she told me of it the first night after she cooked.

Ygrette:
You can't get her to do no shit! What's wrong with you men atimes? You think women are slaves or that they belong in the kitchen and anything relating to that must be delegated to them?

What's your wife's business with your get- together? And who told you you don't have a choice on whether to host or not? Must you live a fake life for church?

When your wife got married to you, she may have signed up for a lifetime of rendering catering services to her family, yes, but never for the whole village.

Oga, better contract the job to a caterer. If madam says she wouldn't do it, so be it.

You men can be heartless sometimes esp entitled husbands..like wtf?

I hope you're not married, if not, you'll suffer your marriage.

chomskyina85:
I can help with the cooking at a very affordable price.
If you're interested let me know

I live in the north.

sako28:
Bros,
Cook the food urself. Show her and ur men's group how things can be done. Why bombard the body system with carbohydrate, sugar and red meat. You guys are getting old for that. Just get chicken, make a small salad and variety of fruits, with bottled water or do a fresh juice( orange, banana, etc)
I think u people's meeting should be more of creative discussion and how to live healthy.

So my brother leave ur wife out of this. am a man like u and I'm talking from what I have done and was really appreciated.

I live in Nigeria and not the US and as such, I won't give my guest grass to eat.

Just so you know, chicken is meat too and you didn't read red meat.

GboyegaD:
Yes I will. If you read my other posts, you would see it clearly as he needs to know what the problem is. That said, she has her grudge and have a right to it.

At this time, there's not much time and so as not to add issues to the compounding issues, it is best he pays for the service than bring friends or family that could be disrespected/ or his wife being disrespected.

While it isn't a big deal, truth is what money can solve shouldn't cause too much problems. Hopefully, post this incidence they would be able to talk and clear whatever the grudge is and this should also be able to appease the wife.

So for every no she says, i should bend to her will. But she won't bend to mine?

Maybe you don't understand how marriage works but if she gets away with this one, what happens in the next 2yrs when the get together holds again? Please try to be reasonable.

Mancala:
"Those people commenting are sounding a bit anti church."

No, they are not anti Church. They are simply applying logic to the situation. The main purpose of the meeting is certainly not to eat and drink. Having said that, why can't the meeting be held in the Church this time? Answer is pride. Someone does not want to lose face!

"If she still refuses you can now employ the service of caterers if you can afford it and if you can't u can explore other options like buying soft drinks and snacks. But you should make it clear to her that that you are not happy with her you too can revengeby declining some helps you render her or sacrifices you make for her so she will know how it pains.DONT just let it go make sure you express your displeasure by actions or at least words or both. NEVER you postpone the meeting to please her or due to lack of options or lack of adequate plan.if she refuses make sure you feed your guest in your house with at least snacks and .soft drinks or better by caterers,this will make you the winner and she will be ashame of her sef"



Caveat Emptor! Pride comes before fall.
Really? Take revenge, make you the winner? Your house? Make her ashamed of herself? Do I really need to explain why this is so off base? These are some of the reasons why lots of Nigerian wives in the older generations were unhappy in their marriage and just stuck it out for the sake of tradition. Same reasons why divorces are prevalent today.

Why are you dangling between different points? I don't get.

femi4:
Pounding yam for 18-25 people? You are evil....you want to kill that woman. Go and get snacks or buy food from eatery for them

You seem to have comprehension problems that i can't fix for you.

Xisnin:
Denouncing Islam would only compound his woes.
Sharia criminal laws applies to everybody living within its jurisdiction.
People who claim that it is only for muslims are not saying the truth.
Sure, no one would disturb a non-muslim for not fasting but if they are accused
of blasphemy, Sharia or mob law will take over.

That's a lie. Sharia law applies only to the muslim people. If you're not a muslim and accused of blasphemy, your case will not go through the sharia court but a judiciary court, cause you don't understand islamic rules.

queenfav:
Even airfreshener left on car dashboard is a hazard.

True, it has kiled me before.

Charmingrascal:
I wonder if her father who is a lecturer will be proud of her among his colleagues.

Will he ever have the audacity to tell his students to be decent and have good morals when obviously his daughter has shown severally on National TV that she has no single moral upbringing.

A HOE that's what she is!

Shey the hoe fvck herself all by herself, right? They was only a vagina in action and no penis, uh? Make una dey use una senses well well.

Erica this, erica that. I never hear anybody fault kid, abi the boy no fit exercise restraint? Is he a dog?

rentAcock:
So much whining
So much bickering
They cannot just express appreciation or positivity
This is only a temporary pinch, it will get better
If petrol is too expensive for you, don't drive
If petrol is too high for you, buy a tesla

Apparently, you don't know how hike in petrol and electricity affects everyone.

Rawhumper:
You display ignomity bitch...u boy always depends on others analysis, dont you have your own sense to understand the simple truth which will be you and Messi whom you are killing yourself for, and doesnt even know and will never know your lineage ever existed. Will never smell a kobo from 700m clause Barca said any club that wants Messi will pay as penalty. This is so simple to comprehend but EWU like you can never understand simple 1 plus 1.

I have no issue with what Ebuka thinks, am not a senseless imp like you who needs little hammer on the head to reset ur lost scattered brain.

Do you really understand the words am writing?











quote author=SirMichael1 post=93508101] learn to quote me without making a mess of my mention.

Ebuka has answered you. Now it's remaining that you use your brain. That's if you have one.

At this rate when i'm done with you, you'd have died of a heart problem. Why do you always make a mess of my mention? Can you not mention me like how a sane person will do? What's with you and insanity? A pact? What happened to the 'normal green' quote box? You ate yours? Is that how grade f IQ patients behave?

UyaiIncomparabl:
Wetin you dey yan me for that place?

Make we relate wella for here.

What place please? How do I know what you're talking about? Really i'm not trolling. I just need your insights on the post with my wife. You pass off as an intelligent here, I really need a drop of that intelligence.

Rawhumper:
You are original yimu infact your YIMMu level eh even Imbeciles can relate better than you honestly.

Ebuka said from what he deduced, dont u understand english and he said Messi wants to be a free agent....but thats his deduction from what i know that 700m i say it agai,is the money City or anyother club will pay u can call it breachment fee, which is different from transfer fee. If there is another 700m City plans to dash Messi because Messi's father is the owner of City then am sorry to argue but if its this same 700m u are killing urself about then know that you and Messi wont get a dime from it.


City can empty their account for Messi, i dont care. What i know is that wait and see the outcome.

Receive sense in JN. Amen!










quote author=SirMichael1 post=93505220] Not the release fee right?

CC Rawhumper

learn to quote me without making a mess of my mention.

Ebuka has answered you. Now it's remaining that you use your brain. That's if you have one.

NwaIgboBoy:
what is Niger state even contributing to nigeria self......

Land masses and defunct dams.

Whobedatte:
Foolish state with no real development, only useless lands left to fallow .
How can a state have such enormous land mass with no tangible development ?
A state that produced two ex-head of states?
What are they trying to achieve?
I travelled from mokwa to dikko junction on my way to kano, imagine I spent 7hours in Niger state alone
Isn't that ridiculous ?
At kotangora, i saw mud houses everywhere in a neighbourhood , the only building made of block is a mosque .
Mosques everywhere , schools, houses all made of mud and nothing to write home about .
Niger state is just land mass with plenty mosques................ nothing more !!!

Na sharia state, that's why. If them no allow people drink, how will someone relax after a days work. Mtcheew

This man is a waste of a governor. A man that interlocks the middle of a dual lane as against the green grasses growing and calls it a project?!

He has no sense of governance whatsoever.

frozen70:
It's quite stressful cooking especially for crowd

Shopping for the food items is a bigger stress

Beg her to pick someone to shop with her and do the cooking

But my question is,why the cooking, is the economy friendly with you guys in this hard times

You guys should start providing the food by paying a caterer to do the cooking and supply to the house who is hosting the meeting

By the time you guys can't afford it again, the cooking will come to an end

Is it even necessary, or you guys just like partying under the canopy of church ?

It's not partying. We start with praise and worship. We don't use any sound producing device.

EbukaHades10:
From what I deduced, Messi is trying to be a free agent and possibly avoid the 700m release clause that Barca wants but the 700m city wants to offer Messi covers the five year contract (3 with City and 2 with New York FC).

My two cents, though

Not the release fee right?

CC Rawhumper

bukatyne:
A wife has to be 'begged' to host 20 men in the church once in two years? Is it 'slavery' for a wife to host her husband's guests?

A husband willing to make the swallow and get someone to help?

The husband who knows the way the rotation works should tell his men group to shift it (because his wife would not cook)?

People are throwing protection and love around; what about love, submission, nurturing!?

If clearing the sink is the problem, she cannot cook, serve and tell husbandman he will clear the sink himself since they are his people in jest?

Hmmmmmm!

@OP:

Nice tradition your church has got.

Trolling or not, the comments are appalling.

Trust me, i wished i was trolling but i'm not.

Really i have never brought my marital issues to nairaland and frankly, this has got to be the first and last time i will. This is just the second time we'll be hosting them and the last time they came, they complimented her cooking skills. Not to forget, i did the pounding of yams for over 20 persons the last time, so she only made the soup. I don't know why people will term cooking of soup a housemaid thing. I'm just peturbed over how many reason here.

Rawhumper:
You are a brainless he goat of the highest order.

Didnt u read the last line of that thrash u showed there, where they said Barca is using the 700m release clause to keep him back in the club since messi is trying to breach the agreement which is none of my business.

You are a big disappointment to intellect, i guess there is someone typing for you while you try as much to express ur empty meaningless thoughts in your dialect to him while he or she translates to English.

Shut your trap and leave with your smelly tail btw your pathetic legs.

Lmao. you had to quote me twice over what you quoted me above. You're the product of a failed experiment at reproduction, hence your iq cannot deduce simple things. I'll say it again, that 700m that city splashed at messi isn't anything about tranfer fee. It's the money he'll earn over the course of playing for cfg. Man city are hoping that messi wins the issue on ground and leave as a free agent so they can sign him and give him the 700m. Not barca.

Angelfrost, Ebukahades10, help me make this boy understand.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Lol. Ode.

Please advice me and not insult me.

Saintmary:
How to get her to do it?
Why don't you put a rope on her neck?
Can't you buy snacks?
You knew it would be your turn to host for a year and you were planning to use your glorified housemaid right?
I don't know why women rush to marry you people. What's your benefit?
Nonsense!

Don't take your fustration out on me. If you spent few more seconds reading, maybe you'll come across the section that reads, "i'll help her make the swallow. She only has to make the soup even with the help of a helper"

Stop quoting me like your fingers are not attached to your brains. If you're from a broken home, do not allow it influence your thought pattern. Is making soup now difficult for a woman. You're the reason men don't see good women to marry anymore.

Rawhumper:
Bro that 700m isnt for Messi, its a clause fee any club who wants messi will pay then plus extra transfer fee thats why messi is in a mess.

The money is not for messi, soon you will see for yourself

your brain is like an engine block without a filter. You just mix in fuel and water without knowing which to filter. If your iq is half as an average person's, you wouldn't find english this hard. You should go for a refund from your school for wasting their time teaching you english when you could have being an apprentice.

Liftmaster:
The issue is asking or proposing to invite third parties into the picture after she has rejected her husbands offer to personally help. I would not do it if I was him. The fact that the husband has been "eating from others" does not mean he owes anybody anything, even up to the extent of inconveniencing his family. A wise husband will always protect and put his family first. Nothing wrong in postponing his hosting rotation or holding the meeting in the Church this time and hosting it later when he has the funds to get a caterer. The fact that he is insisting on exploring options to host the meeting after his wife has said she doesn't want to do it points to egotistical driven motives. It will be extremely therapeutic for this husband to swallow his ego once in a while to remind him that even though he is considered the head of the household, his primary responsibility is to his family not to any outsiders.

trust me, If it was up to me to cancel or postpone, i would. If i had been informed that my wife would not want to do it, i'd have rightly interjected that sunday when it was announced and have mine shifted.

SocialJustice:
Hmm, you want to show them your wife can cook too.

lol. In a way, yes. I can't trust a caterer whose food i haven't tasted to oversee the cooking. And damn, my wife cooks pretty good.

lilyheaven:
Invite your sister or sister in-law to come and assist you, please don’t invite church member, to avoid see finish.

So you don’t know how to cook soup

So what will my wife be doing?

I'll admit, I don't know how to like my wife does.

Tadeknkeepcalm:
Did she adress the issue with this your same tone. One must also learn when to take a stand and not be a doormat.

I didn't start my relationship on the note of being a dictator, hence I usually appeal to her emotions.

[quote author=Liftmaster post=93498669][/quote]It's quite late for that now. If I had known my wife would not agree, I would have told the committee to rotate me with someone else.

I'm even thinking of rewarding her, as a surprise, half the money the caterer asked of. That's 10k.

mariahAngel:
The things that I read on nairaland...

What is so hard about hosting your husband's guests?
She's just being stubborn and unreasonable.
To host, you don't even need to do everything yourself. Just get friends or relatives to help, while you divide the labour among yourselves and supervise....as long as there's enough free food to take home, they'll gladly help.

Truth is, I've since considered this but the thought that my wife will sit while watching my friends and I do the cooking (I don't know how to make the soup. She's good at that) doesn't sit well. If she'd just agree, I don't mind getting more people to assist.

Tadeknkeepcalm:
Better shut up with your woke ideology.

Face your Canada, we will face our Nigeria.
What about the sacrifices he must have made as the husband of the family? Is he here complaining to anybody? A one time thing has become problem. The man is trying to work out solutions but you are here insinuating divorce since that's what your useless feminazi pages teach you.
I hope it's not too late before you realize the false ideology you have submitted yourself too.

It's okay please. I'm not here to cause a fight. I just need advice.