₦airaland Forum

Guy that babe has you in a bottle. She no do juju Na just psychology. She's met a JJC basically so she's preparing her meal. When she's done nobody go tell you. You are a big mumu. I'll advice you to get other gumbodi babes to first break your addiction to her or you tell your wife to come home and practice and teach your wife what you have illegally acquired that's assuming your wife hasn't mastered the art more than you. Look for a very very cute hottie and chase her until your mind is neutral.

SugarPapi:
So... I'm 39/m, married with 3 beautiful kids. Wife and kids are abroad, while I'm gainfully employed here in Nigeria. This is my story -

I've always been a chilled introverted guy with almost zero worries. I'm committed to my work and my work is also committed to me, at least, I'm able to send a healthy amount to my wife and kids in the Queen's country, every month. As a 'Manchelor', this is my daily schedule - wake up, go to work, close late, get home, play PS, skype the fam, sleep, rinse and repeat.

I seldom have time for social media, but once in a while, I log into Facebook and IG to catchup with friends. This was the beginning of my dilemma.

December of last year, I was scrolling on my timeline when I got a notif. Someone had liked my picture. I clicked through her profile and saw this young pretty girl. Honestly, I did not exactly fancy her at first, but I reciprocated the like on one of her pictures and logged of to bed.

When I woke the next morning, she had followed me. I followed back and thanked her for the follow in her dms.

This damsel was around 6ft, pretty, fair and easy on the eyes. She did not have any revealing or tight fitting clothes on her profile so at the beginning, I could not exactly place her physique.

We started chatting that day and as satan will have it, one day, I got leave from work. It was an unfateful Friday so I invited her to a day out at The Palms. We ate , watched a movie then when I wanted to book a ride for her back home, she said she'd like to know my house.

Tbh, I thought this was quite forward and voiced it. I love my Wife dearly. I love my children as well. I would never do anything to deliberately hurt them so I turned down her offer and booked the ride. She stays at Yaba, I at LP1.

She entered her ride and I did not contact her again.

Well, hello next morning!

Her WhatsApp call woke me up. It was a Saturday so I was at home. We spoke at length, she thanked me for the previous day and told me to at least allow her pay me back. "This girl sef!" I thought to myself.

We got to know each other better across the phone in that singular call and I felt it in my soul that she was a genuine one... not an 'InMessage' girl. She was a student at UNILAG in her 300l, studying Accounting. She was a really homely girl, light spoken and very respectful.

It was not yet mid-day when her cab to my house was 10 minutes away.

She came in, looking like a queen. Jeeez! Remembering that day sends shivers down my spine. Thankfully, I leave in a building all to myself so there no prying eyes to call Mama omo SugarPapi in faraway Ireland. My security guy opened for them, she alighted and paid the cab herself. WAWU!

She came and hugged me, we held hands as I pulled her in. She had not fully entered my house when I swept her off her feet, our lips crushed together in intense canoodle. Her tongue was probing inside my mouth as mine hers. Before I could process what was happening, she went on her knees and I felt my soul leave my body.

By this time, I had still not seen her body, so I led her to my guest room and my God!

Brief history... before this day, I had always considered myself an 'ass guy'. Actually, the few guys I consider friends know me as an ass guy. I loved huge melons but 'the behind' gets me most of the time.

Dear NLers, this girl's bossoms where neither ginormous nor small. They were just the perfect size and they stood! My God they stood! Firmly in my face, begging, begging to be...

I'm a 39yo guy and I confess that I have never experienced sex like that till that day! She was so sensual, so soft, no rush, no wrong. She mounted and rode me that day till I came. It has never ever happened before... not even with my partner and my she can f*ck!

It took every fiber of my being not to cry like a child as she rode me with ease and finesse. It was not that type of riding where the girl tries to burst your kidneys or emasculate you. It was focused on just my shaft and its cap. At some point, I was afraid I will pass out.

I had to quickly pull her off me before I pass out.

We ordered some take out, went at it three more times and around 8pm she was on a ride home. I told her to send me her account for me to send her something for the weekend. She out rightly refused and also refused me paying for her transport. WTH?! Abi na mami water tins?

Well it's been three months now and I can't seem to let her go. I have never experienced sex the way she does it. I confess that I may be catching actual feelings for her. I see myself jealous when she receives a call from her male counterparts, she once showed me a video she made with her ex. I was so angry. When she noticed my demeanour, she came, sat on my naked groin and whispered in my ears - "he is in the past, THE PAST".

I have to come voice out my predicament because she is now taking space in my heart. I can't do this to my family.

Guys, how do I 'divorce' this girl?

Here's my advice. Split the money 10 ways. Two parts to a stockbroker, a part for bonds, another 3 for crypto(crypto will crash to between 8k to 15k so u wait till then to buy and hold), a part dollar holdings, another for TBs(treasury bills), the last 3parts for land purchase.

Boogiebee:
Hello Nairalanders,

So straight to the point. Please I need your advice about two things.

1. I just got my inheritance and I got cash of 8M and there's this popular belief of people squandering their inheritance,I don't want that to be my portion so which business can I invest it into. For context, I currently have a job and I'm not ready to quit so please put that into consideration.

2. My younger brother is still a student so he has asked me to save his portion of 6M in bank until he graduates but I don't think that's a good idea. I would rather he put it in some form of secure investment that will be yielding something. Kindly give us suggestions.

May the soul of my beloved Father continue to rest in peace. Amen

My friend sharrap. Na Ur type dey worse pass. Was she not repeatedly warned? I wonder wetin Nigerians see with salt sef. Most eateries & restaurants in 9ja have same problem.

Beremx:
Your wife has asked for forgiveness. What else do you want?

Waiting for misogynistic people like Kris’s.216 to come advice you to divorce your wife

True true ya head no correct

ahnie:
Me just flying Keke and bike today upandan like ASABA Halle berry.






Pls note....to those that would attack me,nor use your negative energy boil my ripe beans
My head nor correct this night o.




Mercychen you're looking beautiful!!!!if to say I be man,na to rush you from behind be the kontos .

Park where? Park for that ya old smelly kpekus. Hello no! I rather wash and let it hang until I see correct place to park. After my reply so I strike you as someone who will wash his wife kpekus covering. Abeg go and buy air freshener. Ya smelly kpekus is disturbing nairaland.

Bola146:
Na them he is one of those washing panties for his wife but will be typing otherwise here pack well and face front jare

My friend sharrap. He purchased the rights to be honoured first in his own house just the same way you ladies want to be honoured with front seat side by side with hubby. It clearly shows that her elder brother is dictating terms or she goes to him regularly for advice or financial favours. It's clearly not right. OP what I'll advice you to do is to get your younger one around and give money to him or her first before giving your wife and see whether she see nothing wrong with it.

Bola146:
As for me I don't see anything bad in that, it's a way to show honour and respect to him, it's just a visit not forever, he will soon go to his house.

NB If you truly want a happy home, don't seek advice on social media, those kids who can't maintain a week relationship will advise you astray. What works for A might not work for B.

Even with your modifications, it's the same thing!!! Is the man living forever in your house? Why come here to rant instead of telling your wife directly that she did something wrong?! You see why I always said good communication with intimacy are good in every home especially with this teens getting married everyday. I know he will still come back to ask if it's good for his wife to be greeting him every morning or late in the night orishirishi Dear Lord have mercy on us all

ssogundele:
Power is said to be transient really! If the Supreme Court judgment had been adhered to sincerely then, all these roforofo might not have happened. Government should be sincere and meditate in an unbiased way to resolve this issue.
The Adebayo man should please consider and be magnanimous too by considering those house owners for country hard o

What are you saying? If you built a house and were living on your land and the govt(military junta) comes and pull down your property and allocates it to someone else then you should now feel sorry for who bought the property? My friend abeg try develop ya brain.

Twisted what? All that the LASG is doing is to show their open disdain and disobedience of law. The supreme court judgement is very clear. 549plots in Shangisha Magodo is theirs so why are they trying to twist a very clear judgement?
They should relocate the current occupiers of the said plots immediately execute the judgement.

Ayemileto:


Omo, LASG don twist the matter sha.

As for me, I'm praying & hoping you receive sense.
Bloody ritualist like you.

Jeezuzpck:
And Adekunle is still going to join.

Simi better start praying o.....

$1trillion won't solve 9jas electricity problem. Our problems stem from our inability to get criminal cases heard, tried and sentences given promptly. Once the courts work effectively even our lawmakers and those in govt will sit up. Slow and lack of dispensation of justice is Nigeria's problem. People are stealing electricity, discos are robbing customers, gencos are short-changed simply because the discos don't want to take up all the power from the gencos.

Faiththatworks:
I have always wanted to make a suggestion to the Nigerian govt,I think there are some govt officials who visit Nairaland to read the opinions of Nigerians.
Please whoever has access to Gen Buhari should tell him it's time to permanently fix the issue of darkness in Nigeria.
My suggestion is very simple, Nigerians should be allowed to vote Yes or No for government to access 3 Billion Dollars from the foreign reserve to fix this issue of inadequate power supply.
If the citizens agree to allow govt access the money, Government should form a company that allows all Nigerian to have a share in the company.
The 3 Billion Dollars should be deployed to fixing the entire power chain, especially production.
If we can employ more than 100000 people to fabricate the iron pipes we need to move move the gas to all the moribund power plants,secure the pipeline right of way,build new transmission lines,send some some yoiths to mambilla to work there,and even start companies to mass produce prepaid meters,I'm sure Nigeria will be out of this mess called power shortage in a short while.
Part of the condition of removing the money is that Nigerians must have an open agreement on the pricing of the electricity.
Finally laws will be made to imprison anyone who makes any attempt to steal the money,and also another law to put a date on the ban of the importation of generators.
If Government can borrow 2.5 billion to build rails,I'm sure accesssing 3 Billion to repair the entire power sector isn't too much.
God bless Nigeria

Oga the solution is very simple. Get all her people out of the house. Give them an ultimatum to leave. Stand your ground that if your people can't live or visit you without issues then hers can't. Period! Get some balls mehn! Dictate what happens in your home and if she gives problems then look for a miniflat or short let to lease for a month. Let your family know where you are and be sparsely be seen in your home. That should reset her brain. If after a month scenario doesn't change my brother divorce, travelling out and limiting all inputs into the home should be on the table and she

Richpet85:
Please do not mind my english consider any error as typo but I honestly needed a sincere advice.

My marriage will be 8 years by September 2022. The journey of marriage has not been rosy and sometime I feel I made a very huge mistake by marrying my wife. I met her in April that year, we date for 6 months and we finally got married Sept same year. Prior before we got married I took her to meet with my siblings since my both parents were late specially our 2nd daughter who her husband sponsored my secondary education. She was cool with my family and never raised any concern during this period of courtship.

Suddenly a night of our wedding everything changed. That same woman that took care of my family as hers turned into directly opposite of who she used to be. To cut the story short, she started dispising my family and the thought of their sight irritates her.

She started by complaining about my sister's son living with me before we got married, her mum and other of my siblings to the point that anytime my eldest sister visited she will leave my house with tears.

My wife also ensure she send all my siblings and relations away from me and my house no go area for them. But what confuses me was that she doesn't behave in a similar manner whenever her own siblings or her mum visits our home. Her behaviour towards my family has destroyed the joy we once had as siblings. The marriage has produced 3 kids of which my last child is less than a month old. Anytime she put to bed her mother has always been the one coming for OMUGOO. None of my siblings can come to my house because of her attitude towards them.

I can't tolerate it further am dying silently as am typing this msg her mum, her immediate junior Sister are in my house and every where is very peaceful. If they were my mum or sibling my house would have been burning by now.

I made conscious effort to kill and ignore this feeling but anytime I see her mum and sister. I feel very depressed in my own house. There are other ill behaviour she have which I can tolerate but seeing myself separated from my siblings because of my wife is my greatest Marital night mare.

I am sincerely fade up with her but my kids are my greatest weakness. The thought of leaving my house and go far away from her or rather travel abroad and leave there permanently has recently overcrowded my mind. But I can't stop thinking about my kids, their future and what they will turn into if she is to raise them alone.

Don't forget I have provided her with everything needed to be comfortable in marriage, house, cars, business etc mostly importanly I am not cheating on her, I don't smoke, I don't keep late night and I don't have friends because she has sent everybody close to me away from my life.

I need a mature advice and no insult please.

I am emotionally trumatised and feel so depressed.

As for me

Frank Edoho(he's number 1 for me because he's classy. His uppercuts are jaw dropping)
Tonto Dike & FFK (I'm just waiting for a fight between these two. I'll get a 100kg sack of popcorn cos it will be spectacular)
Kemi Olunloyo (Mama wèrèbadan)
Charles Igwe(9ja 2pac)
Jim Iyke (Wèrè²)
Reno(Oga Beef)
David Ibeyeomie(Na pastor work dey hold im manifestation if you doubt me ask mama wèrèbadan )

Wow! I'm guessing her father made that foxy decision and judging by that decision they want her to come home otherwise they would have clearly told her that she stopped having a room in their house the second she said I do. I'll advice him to drive her to her parents house, go with his father or senior representative from his family and clearly state that you are temporarily keeping her under their care for about a month. If in a month's time she still has this mindset then initiate divorce proceedings.
Meanwhile, always call, go there at least twice, thrice a week if her parents live nearby or once every two weeks if out of town. Make sure they know that you're putting in an effort to make it work. Be romantic, get sweet savoury flowers, chocolate, ice cream, perfumes, sexy lingerie. Do not initiate sex or love making, let her ooze of it. Get her mum & dad gifts. Take her dad out for drinks, hangouts. Spoil her mum too because she's gonna be doing the work on your behalf. Talk to your wife, anticipate her thinking, her moves and her actions. Dress new, dress young, smell of sex( mouth wash, fresh bath, sex provoking perfume, new shiny shoes, new naira notes, clean car, well perfumed. Take her out to a nice restaurànt. Not eatery O! If after a month she's still hanging on to that mindset or he's beginning to hear some hanky panky, my brother advice him to ask for his BP back. Dem no dey force woman wen say e no want again.

Babsojimjim:
Dear All,

The write up below is exactly what a friend is going through from his wife. Please what sort of action can he take?

Despite, all he has done to please his wife, called Reverend fathers and pastors to counsel them both, his wife is still indifferent to him and is threatening to quit the marriage, citing accumulated pains of the past.

Currently, she says she wants to go back to her parents house else she will die or commit suicide. The man called her parents, and their advise was that since she is his wife, he should decide if to allow her leave his house to come and see them (parents) or stay in his house that the decision is his as the husband.

At this juncture my friend is confused and dont know what to do again.

Even the unmarried friend of his wife who came to stay with them is not helping matter at all as she seems to be enjoying the challenge between my friend and his wife.

Please advise needed. Thanks.

Normally I would have said, "You see ya life". The problem now is you really don't have one. How you go open mouth blot this nonsense?You get pikin sef? Mtchew! Cyber mama.

NovesaTillie:
The parents who abandoned their 12 year old in a boarding school have failed woefully in parenting and should be arrested and charged for negligence and murder

FutureIsFemale:
Nonsense

Since you did not have the intention of marrying Chioma, why took your people to her family and embarrassed her?

May God punish every man that embarrasses a lady with marriage promise.

May God embarrass you on your wedding day the same way you've destroyed English.

Wait come O! Na woman born you? I doubt. If na woman born you at least you go get small,minuscule sense.

Aufbauh:
Rather it was Mohammed Yakubu that gave Reno a TKO. A dazzling punch that make Reno to started telling anyone who cares the story of his life.

Is there anything more spiteful & troubling to a soul when someone tells you that you and your generation both dead, alive and unborn can never match a feat? To me that can keep a man's soul restless for 600 years.

Nahunger:
Ain't there units in the church he can take his concerns too and should no action be taken must he worship there!
Use your head that's why you have one...

Oga wen dey use im head. Chief complaint officer dalu. Before she enter church with that Kain clothing and yansh, all the ushers no see am shebi? People like you go watch mojo for church. Abeg carry ya due process go one corner. He filmed her so that others like her can learn. Oga COO! I hail O!

Nahunger:
And you recorded it to put out here?
What is your aim?
P.s what ever wrong you think she has done you have your equal share of it already

Abegi shut up!
So you see nothing wrong in the video so why are you chastising him for bringing it here? She wore a body hugging dress and intentionally twerking in church. Na God she come praise abi na sons of Ahab she con find to lead them to damnation. Even some children of Israel no go for concentrate with that kind bazooka for their front

When will you all learn? This is a deer, not an antelope.

flyinnizam:
My brother trap caught the bigger one while the smaller one was waiting for it to break free, my brother met both of them and killed them both.

Hahahahaha as in im village people dey follow am

PlaysNigeria:
Op, you go steal phone

You need to drink milk and yoghurt. You also need lots of air. You might be needing blood tonic too.

DSC7:
Was charging and pressing the phone when the Lightening and thunder struck..

Even me sef think say the phone no go work again.... But it's working fine....

Just that i am still feeling dizzy....

I think ure being a bit dilusional as regards MouthAction. So here's my advice to you.
Have a heart to heart talk as regards your sex problems There are lots of videos that teach how to make a woman cum or even squirt using fingers alone. Once he knows how to caress your pussy lips(labia), clitoris and those very sensitive spots inside your pussy especially the center of gravity then your life will never remain the same again. He should get some oil and gentle massage your body especially your boobs, ass, inner laps and finally your labia.
This massages will get you in the mood. Next he should use 2 of his fingers to gently massage your labia while using his thumb to gently fiddle with your clit. Once he sees ure wet then he should gently push two of his middle fingers into Ur pussy half way about 20 to 30 times.
Rub the labia again and after that rub the clit. Once you start feeling the urge for him to go faster then let him push his first 2 fingers into your pussy. Palm should be facing up. He should feel a rough part of your pussy towards the roof.
Using his left hand he should press gently down the lower part of your belly/top part of your pussy and he should be tapping aggressively the g spot. That's where the center of gravity is. If he does it right then you'll experience the most intense orgasm you've ever felt. I should warn you. Make sure you pee before this is done otherwise you'll feel embarrassed. Also once you hit the sky don't hold back. You'll feel like peeing. Let it all go. Teach your husband how to touch you. Otherwise this won't end well.

As for his quick ejaculations he should take burantashi once in a while when you want trouble. Just get ready for trouble O because you might feel bruised before bomboy go Colm down.
There are so many sex tutoring videos online.Get him to watch them with you.

Maryliola:
Hey guys

I’m making this post because I don’t want to be judged and I can’t turn my on people in my real life because they may not understand. Well I’ve been married for 2 plus years I’m 27 with a son. I’m going to get personal so embrace yourself.

Myself and my husband have a good relationship, almost too good because I literally see him like my brother. This is to the point where our romantic/lover side of our relationship is kinda dead. I see him naked, it’s like looking at my brother naked. I don’t feel turned on, or excited. We talk and gist like friends, but romantically things are flat. Our sex life is mediocre I guess. He doesn’t do oralll sexxx and he ejaculates very fast. I’m talking 10 seconds, and it’s every single time despite taking different preventative measures. I know that I’m extremely clean as I’m very observant of myself and he also tells me all the time. Yet orall sexxx is disgusting to him and “dehumanising”. There’s no passion when we kiss, its forced most times.


Lately I’ve been finding myself fantasising about being touched by a man , almost every night . A man that will give me orall sexx a man that will turn me on and blow me away. I don’t want to be judged here, but this is genuinely how I’ve been feeling. I don’t want to put pressure on my husband as he has other things to worry about.
A man that will kiss me in all the right places and make me feel like a woman. Sometimes I believe I’m being delusional, or unrealistic. I’m trying to get rid of these thoughts, but I really don’t know how. I have never cheated on my husband and I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I really just want to know how married people cope when that spark is gone. When you begin to look at your spouse like a brother or sister, and romantically the vibes are not there.

Let me also say that I’ve addressed this to him many times, but he stands he’s not willing to compromise.

Help!

Mods, I need this on front page as I need help for people to see this.

Clearly SS.
Between Esan & Efik. Efik has sweeter soups but Esan has the most soup in the country.

iamyemiakins:
Who get soup pass between South-East and South-South sef?!

Make I know where I go dey find babe from, I must try all these soups and more!

Commanderinpips:
Just get him moringa seeds. Let him eat like 15 seeds raw without peeling it, then go to church for Thanksgiving trust me it works.

15seeds of Morninga?�
Oga you are a killer. Even 4seeds for a grown adult dey cause problems then you say 15?
See as you wan take kill another man pikin. OP buy lemon or lime, dice it up and soak it in water. Give him to drink after he's eaten any of these foods. Groundnut, yoghurt, beans & its derivatives, 2 eggs, meat or corn. If no belching or farting between 5-15mins take him to the hospital immediately.

See dem. Killer squad. Na how many you Don kill na only God can tell.

Kissmyassbiach:
If you’re both not ready then abort it. The problem will be finding the money and a qualified doctor who’s willing (because it’s illegal)

But I’m pretty sure you’d be able to find some NGO’s on Twitter who do it(for free I think). If it’s not far gone, there are abortion medications available.

Don’t allow illiterates make you feel like a child is a punishment for having premarital sex. Children need love and care and a stable environment. If you’re not ready to offer that, don’t add to the millions of struggling kids. Sentiments aside.

Next time make sure you’re well protected to avoid it.

Ps: if anyone tries to guilt trip you and make you keep the child, y’all should have the baby and give it to them to adopt since they’re pro life.

Are you serious?

bablon20:
It's very simple, get sniper, have it spread on the engine of the car and turn d ignition on, leave d ignition on overnight. U will have me to thank later.

My friend shut up if you have nothing meaningful to contribute. Even Buckingham palace and Aso rock get rat. No be rat pursue una president from office? Mtchewwwwww

kenzysmith:
Rat in your car engine? Is like you are a very dirty person

dollynnn:
Marry a man who respects you,love is not enough!

What exactly are you saying? Gibberish

Look at your life. You think you can come here and hand us half truths because we mumu like you? Why would he be disturbing you if you have not been chopping his money. You chop money and now to go deliver returns u wan form sontin else. Make thunder fire that hand when you take dey type that rubbish.

siofra:
There's this yahoo boy that has been disturbing me to go to his hotel room. He's a course mate. God knows how many times I've turned him down. I'm tired. So I want to tell him I have a vaginal infection that could be sexually transmitted.
Is it okay to tell him this?
Is this lie going to bite me back somehow?

Get a lawyer and apply for nullification of the marriage. You have no problem here. You are not applying for a divorce but rather a nullification.

https://www.mondaq.com/nigeria/divorce/1009324/the-process-and-grounds-for-annulment-of-marriage-in-nigeria

ChineduChinedu:
Please help, I need advice, I am very confused man, I don't know what to do in this situation

There is this girl I met in Lagos she help me find a house in Lagos from there we started dating.

I Asked her to marry me and get pregnant for me. Later she got pregnant for me.
She started disturbing me about marriage rights.

On the wedding day I discovered that she has 3 children for one man.
I have asked her several times even before she got pregnant she keep saying no

A day before the wedding, one of my uncle called me and tell me that one babalawo said that the woman I want to marry has 3 kids already.

All that day I wasn't myself I woke her up at midnight and forced the truth out of her
She admitted and start begging me to forgive her, she said she has been looking for the best time to tell me. All this are happening on our wedding day, she beg me not to tell anyone that it can be secrets between me and her àlone, I insisted that I must tell my people from my state enugu to Lagos

My people discouraged me and said I should thank God for revealing this early.
That's how I cancelled the church wedding.

Court marriage 30th September
Church wedding 2nd October
But Before that wedding day, we did court marriage, I told her that I don't want to do court marriage because if she cheat on me I will divorce her and loose my half of my money she got angry, the first day we didn't talk, 2nd day same, Then 3rd day she start packing her loads, I beg her to stay that we have few days to church wedding she insisted that If I don't do the court that I should cancel the church wedding that she can't trust me without court marriage

We did the court marriage, without my parents consent cuz it didn't come from my heart, her junior brother is the one that sighn for me in the court

I don't know what to do in this situation oo

Her first son is 13 years
2nd son 8 years
3rd girl 6 years
And now she is pregnant for me aa

Am 30 years while I don't know her real age

We have lived together for 8 months before I could discover this
And during this period we have been together
She controls me alots and that make me sad
She shout at me too
If ask me to do something for her and I refuse it becomes problem

Please what do I do ?

fasho01:
They are his children too after all. Let a competent court of law settle the issue of custody rather than this

The police are only enforcing a subsisting court judgment. Nedu said so himself.

Una no see say dem resemble devil? Abeg left matter jare