₦airaland Forum

They all look tacky..!
Nothing impressive!!

All the lawyers and judge just dey talk their own...
Faruk don know say na im go laugh last..

Politics has always been games so this shouldn't be news..

Use short-cuts/blackmail...
Get pregnant ot threaten to kill yourself if they won't let you.At some point,they'd have no choice but to let you have your way...but do not say they didn't warn you!!
All marriages have their challenges but inter-tribal marriages have more especially when parents are not fully supportive.

This op is a fool.
I dunno who Lizzy Anjorin is but why must you always assume Nollywood female acts are public toilets or fairly used whatever?
You sabi am abi you don fvck am before?
You nko?
Okrika grade 10!!
Nonsense!!
Person say she nor fit marry poor man...e dey scratch you for body..
Why?
Because you are poor ehn?
Oshi!!
Bad belle person!
Wey your own interview?
Tooo poooor to be known to exist talk less getting a woman..
Mtcheeeeeeeeew

Royal Roy: Is this Slimyem of early 2012? Funny how I noticed a sudden increase in ur maturity all of a sudden. Well....I guess lots of life's experiences wl make one aspire to be a better person!
Kudos to the new you!!!!

I don't understand this mumbo jumbo..
There is no "new" me anywhere.
Different topics/situations,different approaches.
You either only see what you want to see and/or get what you ask for when you do.

honeric01: You're concluding but for me, i am not, rather i am using the word "maybe" "what if". hope you can now spot the difference?

the difference between people you quoted and yourself is that you're concluding while we aren't.

concluding,assuming,specuilating,insinuating...all na use of english.I know what i see and interprete.i read in between lines and its enough to back up my submission.
There's no point making excuses here except you are purposely choosing to ignore the obvious.
This man doesn't care and his actions are loud enough to say so!!
There's no point being in a relationship if your partner(male or female) can't be or pretend to be your safety net in times of trouble especially not after four years!

honeric01: Why not let the OP answer series of questions asked her so far?

why jump the gun assuming you know the real deal in the relationship?

Which gun am i jumping?
Aren't you assuming too..?
..or aren't you saying maybe the lady spends beyond her means?
...or didn't you see where someone else assumed the man is saving towards marriage even though the op didn't expressly state that..?
Abeg,we are all assuming until the op comes to answer the questions..

cotton101: maybe i'm being simple here - but when someone complains that her boyfriend did not replace her stolen phones and bought himself an ipad then there is a problem - she didn't say she feeds him and he NEVER gives her money or buys here stuff - from my understanding of the first post she only mentioned these things to assume that he will leave her to pay house rent and school fees is taking it a bit too far.

anyway everyone knows how they manage their own.

there is a difference between a man not buying BB and buying food for the family

The complain isn't about him not replacing her phone...but his insesitivity.
I'm guessing all he said was "eeyah" and "sorry dear"-empty emphaty..only to go spoil himself shortly afterwards.
The phone example is probably one out of many instances too.
Its been four years..she knows him enough to know he is stingy for real.
Her posting it here is her asking if it is or its nothing to be worried about.

Holier than thou people too plenty for this section..and all na lie.
This man na correct aka-gum.
His type is well known.
Money for essentials go hard am because his wife is independent.
Na she go suffer am.
His money go be his own money and her money will be theirs!
If it was some random babe demanding or expecting some responsibilty,she can be thrashed for being a long throat but not a fiancee or gf of four years.
She deserves better!!

Insensitive man or one who couldn't care less for you even in necessary situations or an obvious need despite being able to afford it.
Who needs a stingy man?
...or the spirits wills but the hand says NO kind..
Who needs a figure-head man?
It isn't wrong to want a man who can show support financially or otherwise occassionally(even if its to indulge yourself) and/or when necessary especially not after fours years.
There might be underlying issues you didn't mention but if you say your man is stingy after four years relationship,then he is and its reason enough to walk because he might not change!
My dear,find your level.
You sound like you can take care of yourself already so you don't NEED him.

...the rebel mostly.. and the troubleshooter other times...

ARareGem: @ slimyem, lol at telling you which meat to pick. I have the same issues with her. I mean, the woman hoards everything. It ticks me off. Our home was such a free one. Now there are restrictions everywhere and for every little thing. You must ask before using.

Sometimes, I feel like a stranger in my own home. It's sad.

You are going to have to live with it.
What i did was to start seeing my home as her home too and accepting the fact that she had as much right as I did in that house.
She was a WIFE not a girlfriend....and somehow,I knew I had to let her take charge.It was the most sensible thing to do especially since I wasn't planning to stay in the house forever.
I quickly understood that two captains cannot man one ship and went back to my position as a DAUGHTER.

As for communication, I don't think the woman has heard such a word. It's either her way or the highway. And I sure have been using the highway.

But the problem is we are not getting anywhere, and the woman isn't even trying! Funny enough, I sort of picked the woman for my dad.

Rivalry won't help much.
You can't play her roles and she can't play yours.
Someone has to slow down for the other for peace to reign.
Do not stay out or away from her and do not stop trying to talk.Let her know how you feel if she offends you.I'm sure she'd be reasonable.
There must have been something you saw in her that made you sign her up for your dad in the first place.I'm almost certain its still there.
Find and exploit it.
Its a long walk but you'll get there hopefully....just like i did.

[quote author=Brand_new]Agbani..*check* that girl is on point jor!
Her natural hair is a killer.
Girls that always rock hair extensions are wor! Wor! Natural rocks better.
***instant attraction things***[/quote]That you can't tell the difference says so much about what's instantly attracting you..
That's a weave.
Open your eyes!

Hmmn..
A reponsible prisoner..
A maniacal husband....
Too bad he can't be called a responsible citizen.

He was too transparent anyone should have known he wasn't for real.
How anyone can even have an offline conversation,relationship or deals with someone who wrote so incoherently beats me..

Op,did they come with their own bedsheet?
...or were they expecting you(the host) to have to wash off the souvenir they must have left behind?
Haba!
They are shameless for real.
Lack of civility and common sense.
No point making excuses for the act.

We were friends from day one as my dad made sure to have us introduced early on....but

(especially
when you're the eldest daugther and
had been the 'wife figure' for some
time)? How do you cope with her taking
charge and changing practically
everything in the house?

Can relate very well to the above.Trouble started from here.It was difficult having someone order me around in a house where i had been administrator and commander for years.
Telling me which meat to pick or not from the pot of soup,..instructing me on some how to's that i felt she didn't know any better
There were a few issues o..sometimes,I was right and she was wrong and vice versa but we always got through it through communicating our displeasures and apologising to each other afterwards
My dad never got involved until one big one where we kept malice for about one week and when he had to get involved,he said he didn't want any explanations and demanded that we both hug it out there and then.Bless him!
All the issues didn't transcend the first two years.We got to know each other better and we got closer.
Today,she is the most amazing person I know.Her kind is rare.
Sent from heaven...i tell you!
She is a big part of what I and siblings are today.
Seeing us together,you wouldn't know she's my step-mum.you'd think she's my sister.
I tell her anything and everything before my dad even gets to know.
Anytime I'm home and my dad isn't around,I sleep in her bed
She has no regrets joining the family and we(I) have none having her with us
The "step-mums are wicked or terrible people" stereotype is strange to me still and ever will be.
It helped that we didn't and still do not give room for any external influences or busy bodies.
Glory to God!

Sons from hell indeed...
Still waiting on their father to bankroll them at age 44 and 33..
Fools!!

Lordwolfs: @slimyem wat i am trying to make the lender understand is that i would not like to loose the passport at all so i wll definatly want to return the money back on time

As long as it is not VALUABLE to the lender,it is NOT a COLLATERAL!!
Present something else as collateral.

dollypenn: Dear nairalanders,pls help with phone nos of a good lawyer to help cousin as her hubby insists the marriage was not legal as they were only married traditionally...no church or court marriage document

What do you think the lawyer should help with or how do you want the lawyer to help?
To prove that the marraige is legal or child support?
If its the former, which i presume it is, its pointless trying to remain with someone who doesn't want you

if
the hubby pulls thru with his
threat,what will she do?...how will she
start from the scratch

Person say im wan marry another wife and you still think it a threat?
...and what do you mean by "start from scratch"?
Is that relationship-wise or sustainment-wise?

Two sick people...no doubt..!
Na one go kill the other last last..

Lordwolfs: My Nigerian passport is very valuable to me cos if i loose this getting a renewal will cost abt 70k and time consuming and i will need also to create travel histroy again in my passport etc

Your collateral is supposed to be useful to the person lending you the money not just to you alone
Wetin I wan take your passport do if you nor show face again?

Caracta: Hi slimyem...

hello sweet.
you ain't leaving too...i hope?

Op,haven't you ever heard where someone is being called "Aunty" and still being disrespected?
You never hear "Aunty Bimpe,ori yin o pe" before?
Or "Buroda Sule,e ni laakaye"?
Priorities!!
Your home and family should be your major concern not some inconsequential title that's of no substance to you or your life!
You already know that all your SIL is doing is on purpose.The idea is to get to you and you are letting her.
When next and every other time she greets you,please answer her.
I'm sure she'll be shocked by it.
...and just know how to keep her at a distance/stay out of her way.
Besides,respect is supposed to be EARNED not demanded/commanded.

*yawns*
This reminds me of peeps that said they were leaving when Seun introduced NL2..
Its not new op..
We know as e go be.
Goodbye...and welcome back in advance!