₦airaland Forum

These politicians are funny as fvck

Today I even saw Tonye Cole and Dumo Lulu Briggs in church ...and Tonye Cole was even taking notes.

...funny as fvck

Let me just say this:

There's a difference between having sex with a girlfriend and having sex with a very mature woman
...girlfriends will mostly have sex with you like they're doing you a favor by letting you fvck them. But a mature woman(i.e a wife) will fvck you with vigor and enthusiasm cos all she just wants is some good fvck.

And there's also a huge difference between having sex with a hookup babe and having sex with a lady who's very h0rn¥.
...a hookup girl will fvck you and ride you as best as she can; only because she's PAID to do just that and she's not doing it because she wants to do it. But a mature woman would expect you to screw her brains out, as she's very willing to screw you with emotions and vigor because that's just the kinda sex she needs at that point in time; as she's fagged out with vanilla sex.

all am saying in essence is.....if you really wanna ENJOY sex to the fullest? Find yourself a cougar or a bored housewife.

Weak men everywhere
Especially in the UK.

Greatblackpimp:
Wouldn't you like to record ?

If both parties wouldn't mind?
Yeah, sure.

But if they don't want that?
Am cool with just watching n joining in.

gfon:
fvcking identical twins at thesame time,fvcking an albino,let me accomplish the first two,then i would consider a dwarf

I've always wanted to fvck an albino too 😆
And then a midget

But my greatest fantasy of all is...
Watching two Bi girls going at each other with vigor n enthusiasm, while I watch. And then when am charged up, from behind I'll plunge in in2 d1 who's eating the other's coochie ☺️

Na man you be like this ni

Baba just say you're a submissive gay

Cos soon you'll be crying and begging her to wear a strap-on and drill your buttocks

9:20pm to 11:10am
...every day
And they almost never miss the timing

As much as I detest the Muslim-muslim ticket
The other fact that Wike has bragging rights
over Atiku and some crooked elements in PDP

...that fact alone, thrills me

Hmmm
This write-up dun touch me

abi make I consider to go pay this Babe a visit, this day next week and say a few words; even as no be me dey at fault ni 🤔

Smash. Smashing. Smashed.
Proceed. Proceeding. Processed.

next

Today?

I and the lady I've been in an exclusive relationship with for almost 6 months now, we had a heated exchange of words (on WhatsApp; just this morning) where we said some things to each other. And then I had to block her.
Till this 10pm she haven't called me.
She haven't texted me.
I can't eat properly.
I can't concentrate on my hustle.

I DON'T feel like dieing tho. (Life's Good).
Although, i'm really not feeling good rn.
But, I still WON'T reach out to her.

E reach to laugh

Scamburster:
Must you comment on every thread foolishly?

Must you foolishly reply to everything you see?

I keep laughing hysterically at those who's been thinking Beatrice Itubo will win Rivers gubernatorial election with the help of Obidients/Igbos in Rivers State; in an attempt to spite Gov. Wike

y'all are just delusional.

qwertyboss:
10-15million with great finishing

10-15m for a story building?
abi the building no get decking for ur eyes

If na by that amount me sef for dun build this type since hand am over give my mama nah

Dude
ONLY brokeness and too much SIMPing would make a guy be having such imaginations or dreams about a girlfriend.

If you're well to do?
Most girlfriends wouldn't leave you.

If you're broke?
That's when you'll be bothered, imagining and dreaming of your girlfriend leaving your broke ass.

My advice?
Learn to think less of that girl.
And find something MORE productive to be doing with yourself and with your time.

Cheers, bro!

obinna58:
30 huh?
What happened when you’re 21, 22

For Hanty to come out to say she's 30
I can bet my hairless balls that Hanty is up2 34

ravensckar:
Lolz. Now, I know what the problem really is. It's the lack of comprehension on your part. Perhaps you attended that type of secondary school where your English teacher doubled as your Yoruba language teacher.

Now, I'll explain slowly. Not because I'm under any compulsion to enlighten you but to rid you of this serial idiocy which has become inherent in your replies. Firstly, my then boss (who was a special adviser to governor Ambode) heard me utter the statement 'picture or I don't believe it'. She said that statement is a proof that I'm a nairalander. Which means she herself is a frequent user of this forum. I believe that should be clear enough unless of course you are inherently harebrained. And if that's the case, I'm afraid even Socrates himself cannot help you.

As for the other gibberish you typed, Abraham Lincoln once said; 'He who knows not, but knows not that he knows not, he's a fool. Shun him'. Enjoy the rest of your day.

SMH

Proverbs 26:4 dude
Go read Proverbs 12:15 and Proverbs 26:4

Shalom!

Dem dun shift Itubo go one side

Cos they've calculated and concluded
that she was/is going No Where


Sorry
Who's Fafaa again

Glocee:
No wahala!

Can I get your current email address?
Wanna get your contact via that.
...dunno How to do the DM thingy folks do here

Cynthia00002525:
Hi, Am Cyndy by name. Am 27Years old. I need a date for a serious relationship. No Guys please, to avoid insults. Interested persons should contact me: 09138450662

Amigo
I just checked out your phone number.
And the fact that you created ur acct TODAY??
It means ONLY one thing.

You're a guy

Oh
Anton-Nia69 is even a stud

My woman always says...
"Yuck! I don't fvck those MEN" ...each and every time I point out a stud, a butch or a tomboy to her.


PS: I'm sorry I ever showed interest in you on her behalf. Now i should just Unfollow you.

ravensckar:
Lies as in how?

That I once worked for a former special adviser or that she singled me out because of what I said?

Oh! Na Special adviser to the governor title dey surprise you. I laugh in Puerto Rico. If you know the people that I work for, you'll know that working for a Special Adviser to the governor isn't a big deal. You better hustle well so that you self go dey roll with correct people.

Funny enough, there's a lady in my current place of work that is related to FFK. The day wey matter red for her, she called him and he came to her rescue. No be everybody wey login to nairaland be lowlife o. Be Careful!

Baba
carry ur cheap lies n ur big big talk go front


He's where I detected your cheap lies, bros

ravensckar:
.....singled me out because of my post here on Nairaland. She said the moment she heard those words, she knew immediately that I must be a nairalander.

As in, person read ur post here on Nairaland and then the person knew you're a Nairaland user??

In your own words...a Nairaland user, saw your post here on Nairaland and then SINGLED YOU OUT to come work for Ambode immediately she read your words here on Nairaland and then KNEW YOU ARE A NAIRALAND USER

Haba Baba, na which kind yeye lamba u dey drop like this for sons of Men nah

We never talk the Ambode own finish, you drop FFK own join ...if person leave you now you go say you dey among persons wey been dey chill with Seyi Tinubu when Bola Tinubu come present his certificate of return to Seyi

Glocee:
I haven't met anyone yet.

We really should do something about that, Sis.

ravensckar:
Back then in the University, I met a nairalander with the username Toyde. In our NYSC camp, I connected with a few others who were really nice guys. After my NYSC, I met Deji, Mr. Oyenekan, Miss Patricia, etc. All of whom I'm still tight with till date.

Several other monikers that I've had interactions or transactions with; Avicky, Stenon, initialize, Bobby, etc.

In all, nairaland is a great forum. It's not as faceless as some of you may think. Hence, I pity all those whose only mission here is to cause mischief and engage in tribal wars. They are missing out on the good things of life.

PS- I once worked for a former special adviser to Governor Ambode who singled me out because of my post here on Nairaland. She said the moment she heard those words, she knew immediately that I must be a nairalander. Since that day, son of man has become careful of what he posts here on nairaland. It's not as faceless as I thought.

Bros...which kind pathetic lies be diswan
@bolded

Read that shit all over again
and tell us if it makes sense to YOU

I obviously stated the facts.
*smiles
...feels good to be right sometimes

Prettygirl200:
I haven't but wish to meet one nairlander, he isn't an active member here I met him through one of my thread that I created and I must say, he's a wonderful being with the kindest heart ever. He is the only guy I didn't regret meeting offline. The rest are bullshit!! he lives in lagos and one day I know I will meet him face to face he's from the west Very kind hearted guy.

English composition na your mate?

One minute she's saying there's one guy she will LIKE TO meet with.
And then the next minute she's saying she didn't regret MEETING HIM offline.


...or maybe she's trying to throw us off the scent of the fact that they've met and fvcked

Nia69:
We've been friends since 2021. She acts clingy, I don't like it, but I've been enduring it so I won't hurt her feelings. I've told her more than twice, but she doesn't stop.

You made her fall for you
Just so you can bed her

Now that you've had ur way with her
She's all over you like bees on honey

And you just not comfortable with the
clinginess she's exhibiting towards ya?

Hahaha