₦airaland Forum

He has got what he wants, 'wife' and kids he obviously doesnt think he needs to do more. I dont understand why you wont marry the mother of your children, maybe he is keeping his options open. Doesnt make any sense. I wish you well.

No women, no human race!!! Deal with it! At least life is never boring with a women! Sooo funny!!!

It says it in the OLD testament but we are no longer under that covenant since Jesus came we have a new covenant. We are supposed to dress modestly but nothing about pants wearing women go to hell! Soooooo funny!!!!

OBLONG:
WRROOOONG!!!! GETTING MARRIED AND HAVING A BABY IS [b] NO [/b]GUARANTEE THAT A MAN WILL STAY WITH YOU. <<enuuff said>

Of course its not, i didnt say that but is it better for her to be used to produce a baby then dumped as an unwed mother? If he loves her shouldnt he be preparing a future with her then having babies. She deserves a chance at a happy ending rather than giving herself to a man that already has a baby with another woman and may continue along that path.

She shouldnt be having anyones baby til he is committed to her in marriage. Sorry i may be old fashioned but she deserves a whole lot better than being some fools baby machine!

* My man who is visiting home in Nigeria
 * My first saturday off in months tomorrow, yay!!
 * Feeling good, paid the rent and bills today!
 * Aaahhhhh, my son is sound asleep, peace just for me!!
 * la la la la la la la la!!!

These so called experts make me crazy, My son, who is now ten years old, loves his sleep! He is a very active boy both mentally and physically. He had day time sleeps til he was four years old. A doctor told me to stop his day sleep cos he was too old at 3yrs. I tried but i would find my boy asleep in the strangest places, he would just lay himself down and go to sleep anywhere, so from then on figured its what he needed and he still loves his sleep and goes to bed much earlier than other kids his age. And the babbling thing, Oh my goodness!!! Thats them learning to talk and communicate, unreal, i would dump that doctor. My boy never stopped in his awake hours, a child babbling is the best sound. You are his parents so do what you think is right for your child. No one knows your child better than you.

Wrong! Dont know about your country but in mine its actually illegal! Under 16 is statutory rape and classed as child abuse and your 20 year old bf would be in jail!

back to topic. just thot i'd post off 3 stages of love feelings n how they're effected by brain chemicals

1) Lust (the craving for sexual gratification), driven by androgens and estrogens;

2) Attraction (or romantic or passionate love, characterized by euphoria when things are going well, terrible mood swings when they’re not, focused attention, obsessive thinking, and intense craving for the individual), driven by high dopamine and norepinephrine levels and low serotonin;

3) Attachment (the sense of calm, peace, and stability one feels with a long-term partner) driven by the hormones oxytocin and vasopressin.
[quote][/quote]Thanks for this explanation, found it very interesting!!!

Hahaha!!! Soooo funny!! Some times you got to laugh at the serious things in life!

Hehehe!! Funny too!!

Good for you!! At least you are starting off with your eyes wide open!! And hopefully you want fall into the same trap i did. I wouldnt trust women either, lol!!! Some would skin you alive if they could all in the name of revenge! I agree, a promise is just a word now, doesnt mean anything so protect yourself. You sound like a smart guy who has his head on the right way so i am sure you will be fine. If both sides protect themselves everyone will be fine.

[quote author=na2day? link=topic=412927.msg5701600#msg5701600 date=1268724822]i am sorry for what happened to u but it boils down to the same thing we are talking about, protecting one's self. i am not a big believer of joint account. she can own her own account and i will own mine. if she gets into debt, she will carry it on by herself and i will make sure i get as little damage to that affect as possible. once again i am sorry u had to go through this but u didnt protect urself and that is what pre nup is all abt, protecting ones self from morons like your ex. even when there is no divorce, some kinda things some couples go through is just insane. i was watching cbs the other night and this lady called in to ask for financial advice. she has a joint account with her hubby and she keeps all the records. she is a stay at home mom and he works. he brings the check, she pays the bills and get them whatever they wanted. after abt 7yrs she is now telling the poor dude they are $65k in credit card debt and the guy is lost for words on how. she claimed she bought clothes and food for their 2 kids. imagine! $65k! ! ! she gotta be kidding me! funny enough my friend's wife did the same thing and when he found out, he seize all the credit cards from her, and destroyed them. events like this makes me wonder if marriage is what the stress [/quote]Thanks and your right, I wasnt smart enough and was too trusting but i have learnt a huge lesson and wont make that mistake again. I am so sorry for your friends, i dont understand why people are so decieving to the people they are supposed to love. I still believe in marriage but would always go through everything together. I think the trick is to not leave the finance up to one person. Maybe a type of pre nup that set down what each would get in a divorce. But i was young and had my head in the clouds and believed in together forever no matter what!! Divorce was not an option but it wasnt my choice. But as i said, a very big lesson learnt!

[quote author=na2day? link=topic=412927.msg5701314#msg5701314 date=1268719272]i need to move to your part of the west, in the USA, plz, if the guy in prison, if he ever gets out and a gets a check, he is in hot soup. and i am curious, if the biz was built by both of u, why was it only in his name? was the house bought by u? the cars, where they bought with your own money or his? if it was all his then u shot urself in the foot[/quote]The business was bought by both of us, both on the documents but i didnt find out til it was too late that while i was away visiting my family he and his parents had got a lawyer and took me off the business partnership. Til this day i dont know how he got away with it but i had nothing so could not get a lawyer. We where married so we had joint accounts, both our wages went into the same account, it was 'our' money. But i made the mistake of not checking cos i trusted him totally. I should of had my own account, i should of check the bank statements, etc, you live and learn!

When i went to talk to a lawyer all our personal assets had been tranferred into his brothers name so i couldnt touch it. The caravan, the car, the house, he had documents to say his brother had purchased it from us, Very crooked! But he will get his! Eventually he signed me over the car but only cos of our son. He gets cash work so nothing is on record so i cant get anything. He is on a overseas holiday at the moment after travelling around Australia after selling the business and pocketing all the money.

I am working but about to move into my my fathers house so i can get some money behind us. I barely earn enough to cover anything so am moving back home. But i still say i got the most important thing, my son! At the end of the day my ex has all the money but is a very sad and miserable man whereas i am grateful for small things. But i am tired of hearing how bad men are treated in divirce, I was naive and too trusting, wont make that mistake again.

But it all comes down to who has the best lawyer and the most money to pay them.

In the west, whoever can afford the better lawyer, wins!!!

I have tried to ignore commenting on this subject but i cant stand it anymore!! I am so sick and tired of hearing how poor men get done out of their money in a divorce, especially in the west!!! Not all are so innocent and loose everything. Some, in my case, are very sneaky and have put everything in his name. Even our business dealings and assets before divorcing me for greener pasture. I ended up with absolutely nothing after 12 years of marriage and building a business and giving him a child! So please stop crying over the men who lost everything cos some women spent the best part of there life trusting, loving, supporting, working hard to end up with nothing! My fatal mistake was trusting that he would never do that to me or our son! I was so wrong!!!

I am always grateful that i have my son but after 12 years of my life and working long hours, i had to start all over from nothing. My ex husband kept everything and all these years later i am still trying to get some maintenance out of him. So i am sorry i dont agree.

Just his name, not very inventive but works for me.

cap28, Thanks for your time. I am proceeding in caution cos i have a child to consider and my son is my first priority. I have been single for so long cos i wanted to focus on raising my son right and not have men in and out of his life but thought i would take a chance with this guy but am trying to be careful. It is difficult cos i have asked a lot of questions that go unanswered so thats why i came on here, to see if i can learn anything. But my eyes and ears are wide open. I would love to relax and enjoy the ride but have to protect my son in case it falls apart.

cap28:
@tink_sh is this your first relationship with a nigerian man? if yes i think you should read some of the comments on this site:

http://www.topix.com/forum/world/nigeria/T6MAVH1UFMVFA7K69

Yes this is my first relationship with a Nigerian man or any man outside of a white aussie.

for all these foreign women dating a nigerian man advice threads, one of the most important info's needed from d threadstarters b4 any logical answer can be given on if u're being played or not is: your age; the guy's age; if you've been married before n have kids already(and yea, it has got a whole lot to do with what you asked), and if possible your pic (sounds like too much, but wit all dis info one might be in a better position to atleast start in trying to answer your question or better yet, wont even need a background story to do dat)
[quote][/quote]He is 34 and I am 39. I have been married before and have one son. I have been single by choice for five years. My pic is on my profile.



wat i dont get is why your the only one calling?? is he in nigeria and you somewhere else??

neways if your no longer feelin the relationship u can talk abt it and if things dont change. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Hi, I am calling him cos i have free international minutes on my phone plan. He is in Malaysia for the past 6 months and i am in Australia. Yes that is my profile pic, why?? I am interested to hear your thoughts.

Your cousin is family and family shouldnt even be considered for that! Absolutely wrong on so many levels!

With so much advice flowing here i think one important point has been missed, it takes 2 people to make a marriage work!!!! You can do all you can and all you want but if he is not interested in changing or making HIS marriage work then it will continue the way it is. How can counselling work if only one goes. Marriage doesnt equal death, its supposed to enhance your life. Just cos you married him doesnt mean you take everything that is dumped on you. You are still a daughter of God and are not meant to be treated with such contempt. Maybe the divorce rate is high but that is no reason to give up your life. Some people divorce for no reason but for some people it is a nessasity to save yourself and your child. What happens when your old, if you live that long with him spreading diseases around. I wish you every blessing and pray for yours and your daughters safety. Please start putting money and important papers aside for you and your daughter, Be safe!!!

[quote author=sista-jay link=topic=410554.msg5658960#msg5658960 date=1268156583]FAT aint cool nor sexy, they should spare a thought for the heart that has to work over time. FAT is lazy/slob. Enough of all this "my belly don full but my mouth never full" attitude.[/quote]Its really closed minded to think that every overweight person is a lazy slob. Some people have injuries that make it difficult to exercise or medication that increases weight, etc. But how boring it would be if everyone was the same. I know some girls that do exercise and do eat well but will never be skinny cos thats not their body type. Who cares anyway, each to their own. Some guys and girls like their partners chunky! Some of the most attractive or skinny people can be the ugliest inside!

Romance Really?? Seems more like War between men and women. Very entertaining though but i wonder why everyone is so angry!! Chill!!

SunnyDayz:
I hate to tell her to stay away because I have a tendency to be close-minded but my gut says to tell her to shut it down.

Follow your gut! It wont stear you wrong.

[quote author=mon-ami link=topic=408440.msg5637287#msg5637287 date=1267857578]I Ask your self y do girls wear bras?

If their bosoms is tight and firm, y do they need bra?

Its already in the position they want it, they just have to find solutions for the nips, make guy no collapse for road! lol [/quote]To support them so they dont end up around your ankles when your 40years old. Especially if they are big they will be very heavy and sag faster with no support!!

adosjun:
I'm just attracted to them. They r just too caring, romantic n loving ,sincere unlike d black. Most important, their skin is soft n banana like with sincere smile. I must marry oyinbo ooo,

Ok, Good luck to you in your search.

Family and business dont mix. If she was your wife i would say 'absolutely' but what happens if you and your gf part, very dangerous! Its your business so you should employ the best person for the job to compliment your business and grow it.

why do you specifically want a white wife?? Shouldnt it be about the person not the colour?? Just a thought.

All these guys saying they would abort or punch her or walk away, amazing!!! Did someone hold a gun to your head to have un protected sex!! Fools!! And what if all couples had boys, the human race is screwed!! Losers!!!