₦airaland Forum

oloriomolade:
HUSBAND SCARCITY!!!
"Husband Scarcity" has become one of the challenges faced by many young girls today. If you go to prayer houses, majority of the intentions are prayer for a life partner. And this calls for concern. Casting our minds back to the time of our mothers and grandmothers, was there
really much of a "Husband Scarcity" problem? Or, maybe there were more men than women then, or there was an adequate corresponding numbers of both genders. I don't think so. Maybe then, the women had values and were prepared to build a
home and not park into a built home. Then, once a young man comes of age and can at least feed himself and his wife, he goes out in search of a wife and the woman really appreciates him and helps him to build a future. What am I really trying to say? We created what we now see as "Husband Scarcity" for ourselves. Today, the reverse is the case. Ask an average girl to define her dream husband; you get things like "he has to be tall, handsome, fair, and rich, own a house at least, and be presentable" and then she adds "God fearing" in order not to sound so worldly. Then, check the number of girls around you and the number of men that meet that standard, and you will see the problem. You hear girls say, "I cannot suffer in my father's house and then go and start suffering with a man." What a wonderful dream! What if from the beginning, you have everything you want and there is no suffering, and later in the marriage, the table turns around, then comes suffering? Will you run away? No one prays for suffering, but it is good to start small and end big, than start big and end small. The problem is that the description majority of girls give of their ideal man is virtually the same. When 50 girls want the same kind of man and the man that fits what they want is just 1 man, and the man can only pick one. Then, what becomes of 49 others? They simply startt lamenting of "Husband Scarcity". Another irony of our time is that it is hard, due to the face of our economy to find a man who is of marriage age who possesses all
those things these ladies want, legally (except those involved in Internet fraud); even the number of those in Internet fraud is not enough to match all those searching for already made husbands.
If you look around, majority of the ladies of substance, of good value and virtue, who are ready to build a home with a man who has prospects, are married and not complaining of husband scarcity. The easiest way to find a husband now, is to change your view of who a husband is. A husband is that man God made and then saw that it may be hard for him to really actualize his purpose for making him, without a help mate and then made the woman and gave to him, and he felt complete and fulfilled. MARRIAGE IS NOT A POVERTY ALLEVIATION PROGRAM. It is a mission of building the family of God here on earth. For those who see marriage as a way out of poverty, it is a way into bondage. Women are HOME BUILDERS, not HOME WARMERS... DON'T CONFUSE A MAN'S PATH WITH HIS DESTINY. Where he is today, may only be a route to where God has destined him to be tomorrow. Another truth is that YOU MAY BE THE ONLY FAST MEANS TO THAT HIS DESTINATION. Join in alleviating "husband scarcity". PICK UP THE RIGHT VALUES. I am not saying that you should pick anyone that comes your way and talks of marriage, not all men are husband materials. What I am saying is that you should stop setting your standard on material acquisitions or
physical appearances. Look beyond the physical. WHAT MAKES A MAN WHO HE IS, IS NOT WHAT HE OWNS OR HOW HE LOOKS, IT IS WHAT HE IS MADE UP OF. And that which he is made of is, most times, not seen with the physical eyes, only its
effects can be seen. Marriage is a permanent thing. Whatever is seen is temporal and that which is not seen is permanent. Relax and go to God.
God did not just make Eve for making sake; He made her for Adam's need to be met. May God help us. Gud nite

datprincess:
men lose interest in certain women after having sex? read why..

Why do some men lose interest in certain women after having sex? I

guess you've also asked yourself this question countless times..

I get many messages from women who say that they are unhappy because their men left them for good few days or weeks after having sex.
Why do some men lose interest in certain women after having sex? read why..

This problem begins with the lack of understanding of the way men think.
A woman will chase a man if she likes him (in most cases) but a man can chase a woman for different reasons. A man might be chasing you because he likes you or just because he wants to have sex.

I get many messages from many confused women who tell me that some men send them messages and say that they love them then do the opposite and i usually reply saying that many men will do whatever it takes just to reach the goal of having sex.

In other words many women are too naive to realize that some men can lie, act as if they have emotions and make up so many stories just to end up having sex.

While most women usually have the goal of bonding with a partner that they love, many men seek sex and nothing else.

Now, the question is; Why do some men lose interest in women after having sex?

At this point you may have guessed that men who lose interest after having sex are the ones who wanted nothing but sex and th...READ MORE HERE..http://www.odiongist.com/2015/09/why-do-some-men-lose-interest-in.html

sweetorgasms:
LIKE seriously this is not how it use to be during the days of our forefathers but now you see women cheating becaus their spouse have small dicks but why are they crazy about big dicks? cant ladies of this generation manage small dicks?

siamia:
@toks 2008

This thread is simply 30plus and single. If u recall, it was originally 40plus and single. U were the same person who suggested that the bar should be lowered a little, to include those who were in their 30s, and I reasoned with u, though it deviated from my original purpose in starting this thread.

This post seems to be addressed to me and ur tone makes me wonder.
If expanding the thread to include men and women in their 30s isn't liberal and democratic, I wonder what is.
Saying that I am being autocratic abt it seems to be a direct attack on my person. I have always maintained a respectful approach to everyone, and encouraged everyone to be likeminded.
If one goes back to read all ur posts on this thread, one thing is clear. U don't think twice abt being verbally confrontational or outright abusive to anyone who doesn't think the way u do. The word for it is BULLY.
I want to believe u are not aware of it, but yes, u do bully people, and its unhealthy.
If u feel so strongly abt it, rather than stir up people's emotions here, pls by all means, start a thread of ur own. I am not taking up ur space here. I will not be drawn into an argument with u.
In life, u don't always have to have the last word. Some times u walk away from a battle in order to maintain ur dignity. Walk away from this one, dear.
Hope ur having a nice day.

modelmike7:
...... Hello Toks, can you kindly remove me from this quote pls? I am not the poster, i just dropped my comment just as you did. So, i am quite surprised at this outburst directed to my gentle self!

modelmike7:
Too bad. The truth of the matter is if you sleep with him, that doesn't guarantee you the job, lets even leave being a virgin out of this (with the way you wrote this, you sounded as if, if you are not a virgin, you would have gone ahead to do this bad thing). Keep your dignity.... BTW, what sex are you? Confused right now!!

scantee:
@OP. Though as i earier stated i am in late 20tez, but pls permit me to comment more here, as a guy who set a deadline to get married before the age of 30, God has blessed me with all i ever wanted in life, i have started living my dream life as i ever wanted...all that remains now is "I DO" being the type of guy that work takes 98% of time i hardly have the opportunity to interact with the opposite sex offline, so online has been the best shot so far, (ABEG OUR BIG BRO AND SIS IN THE HOUSE MAKE UNA ALLOW WE GUYZ@ LATE 20TEZ TO REGISTER OUR MIND TOO NA) @Toks2008 weldone bro.

shiinihost:
girls of these days, if you treat them like a queen, they would friendzone you and term you maga.

ronald4lif:
You forgot to add that it's an institution that some government uses to tame and subdue men and financially albeit unjustly empower women. I don't know if they're pandering to feminism or just silly and would do anything to keep the 'weaker' sex contented. In the West, it is said that at least 6/10 women millionaires became rich either through inheritance or alimony defrayal.

uchezzz:
The 3 forms of wedding are okay and if the couple can afford it, they should go ahead n do all 3.
Trad wedding were i come from is important. If a woman did not do her trad, her daughter cant, or else they go back n do that of d woman first. So why not do it and get it over with.
Court wedding for government and paperwork is also important as long as u live within a state.
White wedding, God institutionalized marriage. Therefore as a christain, a pastor has to bless n pray over my marriage.
But in everything consider your pockets, the wedding is just one day but the marriage is for the rest of your lives
Like my pastor would say ' dont borrow money to feed people that are not hungry on ur wedding day'

sunkoye:
As long as both parents bless the union of a man and woman at any location. Others are ceremonies jare...

Omotayor123:
And Registry

Omotayor123:
Don't know... What I know is that I must do All of the Above!

jnrbayano:
There's no place in the bible where Nairaland and its usage is written.

Why do you use Nairaland?

siamia:
I just want to say this here and nobody shd take offence bcs am not pointing at anyone. As Papa Adeboye once said, iif u feel am talking abt u, then am talking abt u.
Pls I said it clearly, I ate my 40th birthday cake. I even ate after that. If ur nowhere near 40, do not mail me. Let's keep all talk here. Pls. Really, if ur 27 and ur chatting me up, how do u want me to see u? As a person with serious intentions? Everyone who says age is just a number shd try and marry a woman who is 12yrs ur senior. One day u'll wake up and accuse her of jazzing u. If u want an older woman, go for someone in ur age bracket, so that when people see u both in public, the age disparity will not look ridiculous.
So, how did everyone's day go?

siamia:
I feel that when it comes to marriage, there shd be no age limit, nor price tag. Love is where u find it. And the rest is nobody's business. If ur 23 or 30, and the woman that makes ur heart beat faster is 30 or 42, by all means, go for it. Don't let anyone stop u. Yes, people may talk. Yes, ur family and friends may react, yes, there may be comments and sniggers, but at the end of the day, its ur personal happiness that is at stake.
I have friends who are married to far younger men, and their marriage is a wonder to beyond. They don't take each other for granted, bcs they know they got married against all odds.
Is marriage abt age gap? There are people married to their age mates, and the marriage has crashed.
Marriage is about love, compatibility, submission and mutual respect.
As in all spheres of life, there are pros and there are cons. Marrying an older woman, u get the advantage of her experience, her maturity, her mental and emotional stability, and yes, her industriousness. Its likely an older woman is not a cake and ice cream girl. She has seen it all and she wants to build a real home. Bcs she is mature, she can hold the home well, and represent u in public.
On the other hand, u will have to earn her respect as a man, if not she will disrespect u. To do that, u must show her the same qualities she could have found in an older man...then she will submit to u.
Why do some women marry far older men? For the same reasons.
@davindal. I do not know u f2f so I cannot properly assess if ur ready to settle down. But I will say this, in terms of age gap, a closer or wider gap is not a guarantee of a happy, peaceful and successful home.
Gdnte everyone and have a lovely week ahead.

aameyah:
Different strokes for different folks. He could be more mature than a lot of granpas out there....

Sparkles003:
if he was above 23 would you advice him to marry an older lady

Sparkles003:
Why won't you advice him to go for an older lady? just asking

EdCure:
God surely has a plan for his children. More greater plan for his servants.

God bless the vice president.

udysweet:
And suddenly d number vanishes! I ddnt take it dwn. Was abt to and can't it anumore. I guess der goes my fud contrct abi?*sad face*

Soneh:
I don't give a damn if they are one of the less paid ,political offices should be made less attractive so that only those really willing to serve their people take such political positions.come to think of it , nigeria is one of the poorest nations on earth so why shouldn't our politicians be amonmg the lowest earners on earth

Moana:
im yet to reach 30 but i think i can learn from this thread please do not ban me

Davindal:
Heh! Heh!! Oga ooo! Your case nobi here oo. It has both spiritual and psychological dimensions. I recommend TB Joshua, and a renowned psychiatrist(psychologist) - who has proven excellence in the field of Psychiatry - for you. With these two kinda personalities, sure you will be let off that hook. Once again, you no well atall.

No vex oo. I just advised you sha. So don't take offense at what I said.

Davindal:
But, I just finished my university education seven months ago; and currently, I'm awaiting this impending 2015(this Oct 28) batch B nysc program.

Moreover, I now manage my late dad's business. What expirience do I need again...before I settle down? I seriously want to settle down.

Anyway, thanks bro.

Davindal:
Well, I'm not up to 30, not to talk about 30+; but I would want to learn a few things from you guys. Less I forget, I'm 23. And wouldn't mind marrying a lady about 8yrs older than me. After all, age is number. So far the person's behaviour is okay; I'm satisfied.

Like seriously, I just ditched my bae; whom I have had hope of marrying in two years time from now, due to her ill character dispositions. I that I need a mature mind, not a 20yrs old any longer. So it is time to give older ladies chance.

udysweet:
Lobatan!

udysweet:
Yay,I don see potential client o. Guys watch me land a biz deal wit my 1st soup client,hahahahahaha! But come to tink of it,wldnt be a bad idea cooking and delivering soups and foods to people too busy to do dat. Pple mak a living out of dis. But me wey com be shy person,how do I evn go about makin dis hapn?*scratches head* anyway let's stat frm smwer 1st