₦airaland Forum

Hilarious thread.

Ladies! I'm waiting. I am big catch o, forget forming.

Lalasticlala please FP this thread.

These nigerians are bloody razz, hypocritical, narrow-minded, uneducated, unenlightened, backwards, shameless, embarrassing, loud, rude, callous, bitter, bunch of local dogs. MY LORD! People like this make me ashamed to me a nigerian. Giving our country a bad image. Some people really need to stay in the village.

Sad thing is the meme isn't insulting. It's just shows GEJ's facial expression when thinking. I'm so mad right now.

BLOODY LOCAL DOGS!

The homophobia is peak. See vexing, lol.

You're so right. It's highly advised to clear your mind and know the current person is a different person from your exes. However, you can use past relationships to know where you messed up, use it to improve and strengthen yourself mentally and emotionally for the tedious ride called "marriage".

Everyone partner you have is an opportunity to learn, understand and be wiser in rough situations. "Funmi did this to me back then and I acted like this, let me do it differently with Ada and see", "Tony was bad at sex like Chike is now, and I handled it horribly then. I'll be more considerate this time." etc.

Use your past relationships as guidelines, don't just see them as ways to destructively criticize your present partner like you're perfect. "My Ex was thicker and longer than you" SO WHAT?! Everyone is different, move on.

sweetgala:
A very accurate conclusion, yoruba men are vey promiscuous, it does not remove form their ability to be extremely romantic and living where they want.

It really is a problem because when you start to amass many female companions and ignore your business interests you would be financially reduced and may not be able to satisfy your obligations (children).

I would not advice anyone to have many children, even if you give them everything when you are alive, once you are gone they'll sell and share your will because there are too many divergent interests.

My grandfather had 64, who all lived a life I would be envious of in any millennium

64?! You must be joking lol. Presently in this declining economy, any man with more than two is digging early grave.

Exactly, yoruba men differ from Igbo men when it comes to career goals. Igbo men focus on the money before finding his light-skinned beauty queen. Yoruba men get too distracted with woman drama. Doing all the orobos and lekpas he comes by, no taste at all. Sad!

Decker:
Majority of Yoruba men know how to love a woman and show her love. If a Yoruba man loves his woman, he would treat her like a queen. Yoruba men are romantic. That's why you still see poor Yoruba men with loyal wives.

Majority of Igbo men aren't really romantic. Most of them think they are, but they actually aren't. They believe being romantic is by spending money on a woman, rather than showing her affection.
The average Igbo man would first acquire all the wealth he can acquire before thinking of going into a serious relationship, especially one aimed at marriage, because he believes that money is the most essential thing in a relationship, and that's a wrong notion.

And before people start calling me a tribal bigot, I am actually Igbo, but I always try as much as possible to always uphold the truth, irrespective of the tribe(s) involved.

Yoruba are very very polygamous minded. It's mainly due to the facts you pointed out. They have game and they wanna win all the hearts they can, rock every cooch they can. Trust me, the stigma of yoruba men being philanderers is largely true. Every tribe has their flaws I guess.

This is coming from a yoruba guy.

You're clearly describing immature guys with low self-esteem.

No. 2 reminds me of a friend in college who gave his friend the go-ahead to do the babe that dated him for a week and dumped him. He was desperate for revenge because he was the joke of the whole school. Mehn, his friend dulled his life oh! His friend and the babe were madly in love, kissing everywhere. I told him "Guy, move on, your plan failed". He was still saying "I trust my guy, he wants it to be painful". Till the end of college, those ones were still sucking each other's lips in all the corners of the school compound. My guy was a wreck and his grades were seriously affected. Couldn't get admission to top universities.

Moral of the story: If a girl gives you yawa, forms hard to get, cheats on you or dumps you, JUST MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE! That's the best payback.

Hahaha! Nigerians are just the funniest people. Even the pastor was enjoying it. Disturbing yet funny.

Helloflife:
Is it that none of you nairalanders have ever been in this situation before,i need advice and not insults.

If there's one thing men hate with a passion, it's being led on. That's why these guys are vexing. It's belittling because men naturally have a big ego.

If and when you get outta this dilemma (by telling him how you feel, obviously), don't ever make the same mistake of leading a guy on. It's very troubling emotionally and can be dangerous in some cases assuming he doesn't take it very well.

Girl: I like nice guys, I don't do bad boys like other shallow girls.
Me: Good to know

Later...

Girl: Who's that fine guy with the long hair talking to those girls? You said "hello" to him.
Me: That's my nigga there. He's been doing all the girls on camp.
Girl: I don't know why girls are so dumb.

Later...

*sees girl laughing with my friend at mami market*

Later...

*bumps into friend and asks about the girl*

Friend: Yeah bro, yanned her last night. She was telling me she's a "V" but she wants me to be her 1st. Told her "nah" I don't do virgins. They get too attached.

CHAI!

THESE HOES AIN'T LOYAL!

ronald4lif:
Lol. You for lash am na guy, via the d*g*y way. That's usually the best tactics to handle BBW for slender guys like us.

Hahaha. Okay next time.

When it comes to mental disorders (mild or severe) it's best for him to seek professional help. Mood swing is one of those things people overlook especially in countries like Nigeria filled with very ignorant, shallow people. And it's very bad. His mood wing could be a symptom of serious mental disorders like chronic depression, bipolar disorder etc. He might be reacting to a horrible experience(s) in the past (PTSD). That's why I suggest he seeks professional help. Find the root.

The thing is he has to acknowledge he has a problem. Let him admit he needs help so he'll free his mind to steps he can take to get better. If he doesn't think its that serious, you can tell him to do what I told my sister when she was going through the same issue: EXERCISE. When he's beginning to feel sad and empty, tell him to engage in an intensive exercise like jogging around his estate. I'll personally recommend weight lifting since he's a guy. It works and my sister and I are living proof of the benefits of exercising. You can look it up if you doubt me.

Good luck.

Stop thinking dirty, man. It is what it is, she's just playing with your body parts. Next time, zip down so she can have a very good grab of your shlong to wiggle and have fun with. BUT REMEMBER, it means nothing.

Oh, and if you're nice enough, ask the other female choir members if they wanna play with your shlong too. They might need to relax once in a while in order to hit those high notes. Be nice!

ronald4lif:
Egbon mi, what you said it's accurate. Guys are used to paying ladies tfare and for a lady to pay for a guy's tfare is rare and like you rightly said it's capable of making the guy curious to know her. I'd already convey same opinion to the OP before now.

Same happened to me when I was serving. This BBW cheerfully paid for my fare. It was so unreal and I felt obliged to yan this rare chick. Unfortunately, I was too skinny to handle a BBW so I let it slide. Lol.

Leriebloom:
Lolz, i still would av passed on that giving d situation, loaded or not. "Humble myself"?? , excuse me, what gave u d idea that i wasn't being humble just because i didnt give the guy my contact. And for ur information i am not looking for an already made man so u can keep ur assumptions, thank you.

Listen, I'm not here to castigate you. That's just how you came off; that you found him cheap for being incapable of paying for his own transport fare and still had the ballz to ask you out. And I implied you can't validate his ability to provide for you as your boyfriend because of that single incident. Reason I said "humble yourself". I was just following your lead. If I misinterpreted, my bad.

An emotionally confused and confusing babe. Please, don't come into my life to scatter it. Go and scatter yourself.

DeTrickster:
Thanks Mate thats the plan i have but i just admit its day 6 and its not been easy. i had to work this weekend just to get a move on

Bruv, don't get that feeling twisted. It's normal to be fond of someone you hooking up with often. I'll defo miss her too...and the cooch lol. Just admit to yourself to miss her but you need to let her go. It'll pass with time, just stay hard.

Leriebloom, I don't get. If he paid for you, he would be allowed to ask you out? Or did he look too low-class to ask you out? Elaborate.

Maybe you should look at it differently though. What if he's a loaded guy but he had no cash on him, then he decided to ask you out to show appreciation for paying for him? He might be that rich guy you've been dreaming of. Humble yourself!

That's the thing with 'friends with benefits', innit bruv? Someone eventually gets too attached. Keep avoiding her till she moves on. She's being emotional, bruv. Help her make the right decision by choosing a legit commitment over whatever she thinks y'all can have...which you clearly don't want.

Good luck.

I don't understand niggas who sound like they haven't dated naija chicks before.

Not a secret, man. It is so CLEAR, SIMPLE but SAD what most naija babes want...HER MAGA. A faithful, loaded guy that makes her too comfortable and stand out of her friends...IN THIS DEAD, BROKE COUNTRY O! Nothing makes a naija babe more happier than looking the freshest outta her clique. Fvcking false fulfillment! How can a woman feel fulfilled in life not because of what she has succeeded in, not because of the goals she has achieved, but because she hammered a rich, thirsty mugu? God forbid! I just don't understand how some women view life. Truly, the love of money is the root of all evil...including being an oloshi. I put myself in their shoes to sincerely try to understand why I would want to be totally useless, jobless and completely depend on my partner just because of my pvssy...BLOODY NIGHTMARE! Sex worker mentality.

God bless the exceptions.

1st of all, there's no one specific reason why everyone cheats. However, a general reason for me is poor self-control. If you picture various scenarios of a person cheating, it comes down to being too weak to fight the urge. "Love" alone can't do jack, personality plays a bigger role.

It's is imperative you ask her (not us) why she cheated on you, not to get back with her but for closure. You'll always be wondering why, why, why, and it will negatively affect your outlook on other women if you generalise and tell yourself "all women are cheaters". You'll just be hating pointlessly there. You might have played a huge role (or not) in her weakness to ignore that nigga's anaconda. You don't want it to repeat itself, do you?

And if this thread is a lie...

Can't wait to have my own compound. Dogs, cats and birds everywhere. Never a lonely or dull moment.

Estharfabian:
Uh..


I wasn't generalising.
Okay, I should've written "Some".
My Apologies...I'd modify the instant!

No worries.

queenfav:
God bless you.Because it seems like the husband is her oxygen provider!@op,If you had your financial independence as a woman,I doubt he would be spewing that rubbish.I can't waste time advising you o.When you have seen the light,that you are just a caretaker of children and not a wife,you'll do the right thing.That's assuming you are smart enough.No offense,you seem very dense and immature to even be having kids.How do you raise them when you cannot stand up for yourself?

As in, she's sounds too emotionally and mentally weak. I can see her man smacking this kinda woman around and getting away with it. SAD!

May God help over-submissive african women.

Estharfabian:



Guys could be super funny!
They all Want An independent woman, someone that wouldn't bug 'em Everytime for money for maggi, salt and pepper. yet, they still want You to stay home all day, do Nothing but Cook for 'em and Produce babies! (full HouseWife).


Ain't it a bit Ludicrous?
And if You actually decide to be a full housewife AKA financially Useless! They'd still complain, calling You a parasite!

Y'all should just make up Your mind already!!
An independent woman Won't stay at home all day...! she'd also be hustling, the way guys do.

Chill on the generalization. Her man doesn't rep every Nigerian man. He clearly wants her to be dependent on him UNLIKE me and the rest of the men who feel in this bad economy, only one member of the family shouldn't take all financial responsibilities when two clearly can.

This is why I beg women to build their career before marriage. Now, you can't leave because you'll have nothing to take care of you and your kids. You're his slave, not his wife and he's in total control over your life.

I am a man and I'm telling you men don't just change because of their wives, especially when their wives have nothing without them. Too much pride. You can only hope and pray, nothing else.

Good luck.

Then trim it. Problem solved.

kaziblake:
I can proudly say I have never ask a guy for money.

Yes dat me.
I wrk and earn my own cash.

Good for you. I can assure you with that mentality, men will find it much much more harder to disrespect, use and underappreciate you. And if he does...you owe him nothing. Kick his ass out and move on with ease cause you have more value than spreading your legs. His loss.

kaziblake:
Bla Bla Bla Bla bla.
Nobody is perfect.
But to find a faithful man in naija isn't easy.
If you are really faithful then your girlfriend must be a lucky girl.

To find an ambitious, hardworking, financially independent woman in naija isn't easy. Gold-diggers erywhere.

My future GF will be very very very lucky.

kaziblake:
it's a lie.
I have told myself already that I won't waste my time thinking about any man cos it's already an habit.
Women hardly cheat.

Show me a faithful man and I will show you a pregnant virgin

No 1, I have not cheated in my life. Hell, I have friends who were faithful and LOVED their babes and still got cheated on...multiple times.

No 2, NOT every woman deserves a faithful, loving man. If you do, cool. I can't say the same for the narcissistic, lazy, nagging, gold-digging, unfaithful, conniving, over-controlling, emotionally and verbally abusive females.

Show me a perfect woman, I'll show you a perfect man.

Relationships are overrated and usually doomed from the start. Taking it too seriously will most likely give you unnecessary heartbreak. The only things you should take seriously are courting a babe and marriage.