₦airaland Forum

Fake Knife Gag


http://www.funnypracticaljokes.com/prepackaged-pranks/fake-knife-gag.php

I've had at least one fake knife for as long as I can remember. The knife that I've used for many years has a plain black handle and a plastic shiny blade that retracts into the handle when pressed against someone's body.  However, the fake knife is a great gag for acquaintances who don't really know you well or whom you have only met a few times.

When you attack your victim, it is important to only briefly allow them to see the knife, so they don't spot it as a fake. Just let them get a quick look and then deliver your strike. The great thing about this joke is the person immediately knows you didn't mean them any harm and they feel both relieved and idiotic for being duped so thoroughly.

sorry!!!

[quote author=Aloy.Emeka link=topic=275839.msg3916152#msg3916152 date=1243185658]Let's say she's insecure even though she is beautiful for sure.[/quote]Thank God for karma!!!!!

see wetin some people dey talk after identifying all the "ugly" naija girls.

Naomi Campbell sef nor send anybody message.

head and shoulders shampoo.

Is it only in Nigeria that churches or religious bodies rent and rehabilitate worn down warehouses/areas of town?

@ topic

na today?

if men get bored of their variety of booty calls, why wont they get bored of their wives?

The fact is, people get bored.

Simple.

Father's name: Okeke

Children's names: Ayo and Odun.

My guess?

Father is half Igbo half Yoruba or Igbo by blood Yoruba by birth. Or born in the east and raised/lived in the west.

Its not so much because you're poor as because you lack ambition.

from  A Midsummer Night's Dream


If we shadows have offended,

Think but this, and all is mended,

That you have but slumber'd here

While these visions did appear.

And this weak and idle theme,

No more yielding but a dream


its a tempting thought, but unfortunately, the world is all too real. In which case, the dream is substance.

pictures? Iyabo na the carbon copy of the man in question, I swear.

I saw the photo and my eyes got so wide they looked like the moon.

.

.

Indy mystery: Why do Indianapolis 500 winners drink milk?



https://img505.imageshack.us/img505/7541/amilk.jpg



After crossing the bricked finish line on Sunday, the winner of the Indianapolis 500 will drive into the winner’s circle, be presented with a celebratory wreath and take a swig from a cold bottle of milk. The latter is one of the grandest traditions in sports, but also one of the most confusing. Why milk? Why is it in a bottle? And (this one was actually asked by a girl I knew in college) has it been sitting in the sun all day?

After solving mysteries in Beijing, Boston and Augusta, GA, the old Y! Sports investigative unit is here to answer all your questions in order to solve the mystery of the milk-drinking drivers. It all started in 1933. After Louis Meyer won his second Indianapolis 500, he requested a cold bottle of buttermilk to quench his thirst. The Yonkers, NY native had grown up drinking the beverage and favored it throughout his racing days.  Three years later, Meyer won his third title and, again, he requested a cold glass of buttermilk to celebrate. This time, a newspaper photographer snapped a photo of Meyer taking a swig from the bottle while holding up three fingers, one to represent each of his Indy victories. The shot would appear the next day in a number of newspapers.

As legend has it, a local dairy executive saw the photo and, realizing a great marketing opportunity, vowed that milk would be given to the winner the following year. (They had thought Meyer was drinking regular milk, not buttermilk.) Except for a stretch from 1947 to 1955, milk has been presented at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway ever since.

Today, instead of buttermilk, the winner is given a choice between whole milk, two percent and skim. Those bottles are held in a cooler by two selected Southern Indiana dairy farmers and are etched with the words “Indianapolis 500 winner,” making the bottles not just a beverage receptacle but a trophy in their own right. The drivers seem to like the milk, not just for what it represents, but because of its taste as well.

Dario Franchitti said in 2007 that the milk is: “Good. Really good. They chill it and it's very cold. I went for full fat inside and then I went outside in Victory Circle after the rain stopped and I had another bottle and I think that was 2%. That was good as well. I was liking the milk.” 

Personally, I can’t imagine that milk is the ideal beverage to consume immediately after finishing a grueling three-hour race run at 200 mph in cramped, often-sweltering conditions. But for the racers at Indianapolis Motor Speedway on Sunday afternoon, no drink would be finer. Thanks to the Indiana Dairy Council for helping solve this mystery. We’ll be raising a tall glass of skim in their honor this Sunday.



http://sports.yahoo.com/nascar/blog/from_the_marbles/post/Indy-mystery-Why-do-Indianapolis-500-winners-dr?urn=nascar,165450

well, if my partner doesnt get bored of me occasionally then something's wrong, imo.

However, if he's bored all the time then I'm in big trouble. That probably means he's cheating.

and vice versa.

na so dem dey do oh.

Na mediator head dem dey take settle quarrell.

the honeymoon phase isnt supposed to last forever.

who goes around permanently on cloud 9?

its probably better they bring this war out of the creeks anyway.

lexyflexy:
some people dey claim 45, dem no be elders again, dem be grand-elders / patrons

abeg who you be?

how old are you? 14 and a half?

some people like claiming they're 2 years old I noticed. Making them the youngest person on nairaland.

aaaawwwwwwww

ogbologbos.

just speaking from personal experience and observation of naija fathers.

JJYOU:
i am sincerely sorry.

no need to be.

some people cant do without their daily fix of tpia. So they run mouth everywhere when they're experiencing withdrawal symptoms.


Dont know how they'll cope when I go on my honeymoon.

the guy said what to do after finally getting a girl to date him.

Not what's the next step after getting a girl to agree to sleep with him.

This is where romance comes in?

hello- no word for romance in Nigeria?

JJYOU:
why do u all hate tpia so much?

JJYOU

I do not need a knight in shining armor plz!

abeg go find the "happiness" threads! aka jolly jollies!!!

yeswecan:
If America really come now with plane dey look for slave way go work for plantaion, and them say after u work small them go free u u think say people no go follow them? hiss" people papa go follow them. make una go seat dowm

speak for yourself plz!

The country is overpopulated anyway- the more of you who jump on the slave ships the better it'll be for those of us who dont!

Bishopking:
Because of what you have just said, you will most likely rot in slavery. Why bringing mamas into this? Afterall, people like you have your blind leaders have made the way for future slavery.

you just confirmed your mental diagnosis.

You dont want your mama to be a slave but you can call other people slaves abi?

Your grandpapa sef na slave.

who dash you slave trader? Na proper cotton picking slave you be.

well, I dont expect anyone not to get bored of me every now and then. And likewise I can get bored of people too.

The important thing is what do you do when you feel bored with your partner. Run out and shag another partner or something else.

naijas have come again.

lannre:
a Dr. actually prescribed it from a Government Hospital. I alomost die even after taken it as prescribed for two days, I have stopped it. I will go back to the General Hospital when am strong enough. My suspicion starts when he was checking drugs to be prescribed from a book. Ha ! am weak .

if the doctor was checking up the drugs before prescribing them, why must you assume he's incompetent?

Please return to the hospital and let them know of your reaction to the drugs.

And plz dont come back with fancy tales of how you later decided to use some fanciful remedy like palm oil mixed with pounded pepper which an "expert" told you about!

take am easy, you hear? You'll be ok by God's grace.

Amoxycillin is an antibiotic, isnt it? Some people do react to that. Have you ever taken it before, and what were you diagnosed with?

You can also try sticking with older doctors if you dont trust the younger ones.

redsun:
Honestly,don't you think we are blessed people with alot of vacuums to fill,unlike the bored average oyinbos that have almost reached their peak,who does nothing but fill their time with football,excessive alcohol,cigarette and all dangerous substances know to man.

Their ancestors are the ones that had fun and adventures to lay their today's foundation,now it's our turn to set precedences for the nest generation,sifting through all the mistakes of oyinbo and building a harmonious and equal society

We will get there,the only thing in a hurry is man,but the world is here for ever.

true.

Unfortunately, people are more bent on self destructing than progress.

There's little others can do about that.

[quote author=Ziggy_mama link=topic=275732.msg3912953#msg3912953 date=1243100716]/\
i
i
u think it is normal [/quote]

JJYOU:
it is not normal. marriage is hard work.

yes, I think its normal for a husband and wife to get bored with each other at some point in time.

Thanks for sharing your opinions instead of jumping on mine!

Dis Guy:
_{^^ see awon aunti wa ^^^ *run comot!}

I do hope you're not referring to me?


I already told your brother you people should go find your aunties at Tarkwa bay.

I dont have vagrant relatives so stop embarassing me with these forced associations plz!