vivianc: Laugh all you want my dear, that's your area of specialty.
I wouldn't even suggest you read and understand what my statement means, ofcourse that's beyond you. In as much as the post doesn't go down well with you, trying to understand it is useless to you, hence we must follow your I-know-it-all mindset.

Just so we are clear, i'm igbo and I said earlier on that I will never marry outside Igbo tribe. My last post gave the reason; Igbo guys are not perfect, I agree and I have my opinion about them but there's an attribute in them I want, so no matter how they are I'm sticking to them.

I guess this is so difficult for you to understand, huh?

Then again, that's my opinion. So why don't you give yours and move on, its that simple.

Btw, i'm not in the business of bashing tribes, no matter how provoked i am. Never have and never will!

Of course you don't bash other tribes. You just say they, like Ijaws for example, suck at marriage and don't respect their women. I doubt any Ijaw would be offended. I'm assuming you were once married to an Ijaw, which is how you came to this nongeneralization. As you were.

~vicky~:
yes but i want a white man this time!

White men are awesome

What matters most in any relationship is luv nd not ur tribe

ogugua88:

Of course you don't bash other tribes. You just say they, like Ijaws for example, suck at marriage and don't respect their women. I doubt any Ijaw would be offended. I'm assuming you were once married to an Ijaw, which is how you came to this nongeneralization. As you were.

Her analysis was fair enough, callin us ( igbo men) stingy and difficult, if that wasn't igbo bashing then i don't know what it is.

ichidodo: Her analysis was fair enough, callin us ( igbo men) stingy and difficult, if that wasn't igbo bashing then i don't know what it is.

That's why I dey laugh. Bashing her future husband. Make she tell him that for his front na. We go see if ring go present itself lol.

ogugua88:

Of course you don't bash other tribes. You just say they, like Ijaws for example, suck at marriage and don't respect their women. I doubt any Ijaw would be offended. I'm assuming you were once married to an Ijaw, which is how you came to this nongeneralization. As you were.

Yes, they have no respect for marriage institution, and for women by my own standard, but they are also good at other aspects that igbo guys at not good at. That's a fact! You can't have it all.

Bashing tribes or not is not the reason i replied you, your gross misunderstanding is. So let's move on already:

There was no misunderstanding. Keep using generalizations. You've met all Ijaws to conclude they don't respect marriage as well as women. You've met all Igbos to conclude that all Igbo men are stingy and difficult yet they respect their wives. Whatever floats your boat.

ogugua88:

That's why I dey laugh. Bashing her future husband. Make she tell him that for his front na. We go see if ring go present itself lol.

Not carryin brief for her but yes most of us are stingy one way or another and we got enormous egos.But the beauty of the matter is understanding and loyalty; She knows what she is up against and yet sticks to what/who she knows best.Now what kind of man wouldn't give his left balls for this kind of woman?

tpia@:


So what exactly are you calling a defect in your origin?

I'd rather not be the one to highlight them, but I know them for sure.

ogugua88: There was no misunderstanding. Keep using generalizations. You've met all Ijaws to conclude they don't respect marriage as well as women. You've met all Igbos to conclude that all Igbo men are stingy and difficult yet they respect their wives. Whatever floats your boat.

My dear, i'm very much in tune with reality and I don't say what I don't know. Yes, I have met most Ijaw guys cos i live in Ijaw land and I observe the environment I live in. I'm also Igbo, so need I say how many igbo guys I have met?

I just stated a fact! To me stating a fact is not bashing. Ijaws and Igbos are the 2 Nigerian tribes I love, that won't stop me from stating a fact!

For instance, business people here in Bayelsa enjoy doing business with the Ijaws more than the Igbos cos Ijaws are generous while ndi igbo gbara sense na mkpo . That's a fact!

Ijaws don't just have respect not only for their women, but for anything called women! They are lucky people who easily make money and they believe women are commodities that money can buy, it doesn't matter who she is. That's why an 80yrs Ijaw man would go after a 20yrs old lady, not because he loves her but because he wants her and all it would take is money. It could also be a 15yrs old boy chasing a 40yrs old lady, pick for yourself!

On the matter of not respecting their marriages, I meant infidelity. Most men cheat but whie most igbo men cheat discretely, Ijaw men don't. 90% of Ijaw men enjoy the comfort of a hotel room more than their homes, it doesn't matter how comfortable their homes are.

I could go on......................

And by the way, i don't need to meet all of them to know this. Statistically, I only need a sample of the population.

Right now, I have both an Ijaw man and Igbo man on my case and I tell them why I can't do any of them.
The Ijaw guy is promising heaven and earth just to make me say yes. The Igbo guy don walka already, after all the marriage is more important to me. He is a man and no woman can tell him what to do.

ichidodo: Not carryin brief for her but yes most of us are stingy one way or another and we got enormous egos.But the beauty of the matter is understanding and loyalty; She knows what she is up against and yet sticks to what/who she knows best.Now what kind of man wouldn't give his left balls for this kind of woman?

Lol........ my dear, I'd rather stick to onye mu na ya ga na apia okpo every morning before ya eweputa ego ( na joke o) than one who will cheat on me korokoro.

Honestly, even in their imperfections, igbo guys rock, for me o!

ichidodo: Not carryin brief for her but yes most of us are stingy one way or another and we got enormous egos.But the beauty of the matter is understanding and loyalty; She knows what she is up against and yet sticks to what/who she knows best.Now what kind of man wouldn't give his left balls for this kind of woman?

There's nothing loyal about generalizations. That's my point. You and others may be stingy and difficult but I know many who aren't. She may know men who respect marriage. I can name several who don't. Anyone going into anything with generalizations may be in for a rude awakening. Such traits or characteristics are not tribe specific.

ogugua88:

There's nothing loyal about generalizations. That's my point. You and others may be stingy and difficult but I know many who aren't. She may be know men who respect marriage. I can name several who don't. Anyone going into anything with generalizations may be in for a rude awakening.

Her generalizations are brutally honest and apt to say the least,you might know some exceptions but that is neither here nor there.It best to have a basic understandin or as you say 'generalization than none at all. If you can't pound fofo on the mortar, you pound it on ground than not to pound at all because one is afraid of a 'rude awakening'

Eeeermmm... Dis question hard for me ooo... I've always wanted to get married to a yoruba girl... But, you know how it is with the parents... The house will be on fire d day I decide to get married to a yoruba girl or rather outside anambra... And it's kinda funny my mum wants me to marry from her villa and my dad wants me to marry from his villa.... Well, all I have to say is just until then...

Lol! People are really funny, you know we choose the aspect of life and statistic that go down well with us. Isn't it funny?

I used "most" by the way. "I think most Igbo guys................"

I think statistics is a useless course. If we can't really on its method then it is useless. I don't see statistics studying the whole population before making deductions, it only studies an integral part or sample of any given population be it animal or things to make deductions which are often times very correct.

That people are known for some traits doesn't mean there ain't no exception.

Generalization is a human phenomenon. We use it all the time, be it in our studies and researches and whatnot. The question is how valid is it?

For instance, the saying that "igbo girls like money." is a generalization based on some informal research. Is it valid? Yes! We can deny it all we want but its the fact. But are there exceptions? Yes! There are!

For instance, Anambra men are less stingy than Imo men. Attend their weddings and find out. We call them money miss road but they are also more arrogant and egocentric. Are there exceptions? Hell yes!

These 2 environment; Igbos and Ijaws are my relevant environment. I study and observe them and my findings might be different from another person's findings, but that doesn't make any of them invalid.


But then again, we can choose to play blind and look the other way or be unrealistic. It doesn't change a fact.

Eeerrmmm... Who said igbo guys are stingy? We ain't stingy ooo... If there's one tin igbo guys are good at... That's spending money!!! Bia vivian kpachara anya gi ooo!!!

dmcdad:
I'd rather not be the one to highlight them, but I know them for sure.

Oh, sorry for your pain then.

E go better.

I assume its a family problem?

ichidodo: Her generalizations are brutally honest and apt to say the least,you might know some exceptions but that is neither here nor there.It best to have a basic understandin or as you say 'generalization than none at all. If you can't pound fofo on the mortar, you pound it on ground than not to pound at all because one is afraid of a 'rude awakening'

My dear biko hapu okwu. One of my friends doesn't like me again cos she says i'm too blunt and that's it.

Do you know the part of Imo i'm from people know us as ndi ike as in any na esute atugba ofuma (I hope you decode?) A nairalander; Crown Prince would attend to that.

So I introduced myself to some people 2days ago, told them where i'm from and they were like " hey! Ndi ojoor! Ndi be unu na eme ihe siri nke!" I laughed with them and told them "Yes, ayi na anyi ajo aru, karia Pericoma sef but not everybody." Is their generalization valid? Hell yes! But there are exceptions and i know this generalization is based on some kinda informal research. But there are exceptions.

Mehn, I don tire abeg. Make I live people in their unrealistic worlds abeg.

ichidodo: Her generalizations are brutally honest and apt to say the least,you might know some exceptions but that is neither here nor there.It best to have a basic understandin or as you say 'generalization than none at all. If you can't pound fofo on the mortar, you pound it on ground than not to pound at all because one is afraid of a 'rude awakening'

A generalization isn't a basic understanding. "Naija girls sleep around anyhow" is a common generalization on this forum. Would you call that a basic understanding?

Someone is calling you and your brothers stingy and you are agreeing lol. Sure, there are exceptions. It doesn't mean that generalization should be swallowed or accepted though. I don't believe in generalizations. There's no such thing as a valid generalization. There's only lack of enlightenment or knowledge.

vivianc:

Lol........ my dear, I'd rather stick to onye mu na ya ga na apia okpo every morning before ya eweputa ego ( na joke o) than one who will cheat on me korokoro.

Honestly, even in their imperfections, igbo guys rock, for me o!

Nne you dey rock my world jor,carry go!

ikekings: Eeerrmmm... Who said igbo guys are stingy? We ain't stingy ooo... If there's one tin igbo guys are good at... That's spending money!!! Bia vivian kpachara anya gi ooo!!!

taa gbafuo! You sef wey broke pass me dey talk.

How you dey jare?

ogugua88:

A generalization isn't a basic understanding. "Naija girls sleep around anyhow" is a common generalization on this forum. Would you call that a basic understanding?

Someone is calling you and your brothers stingy and you are agreeing lol. Sure, there are exceptions. It doesn't mean that generalization should be swallowed or accepted though. I don't believe in generalizations. There's no such thing as a valid generalization. There's only lack of enlightenment or knowledge.

Maybe they ain't valid but most people don't go wrong with them generalizations.Vigilante might not be valid law enforcement agents but sometimes they do get the job done just like generalizations especially when it comes from someone well informed or enlightened.Well anyway we are entitled to our opinions, so what the heck?

Every tribe or race have their flaws, and no tribe or race is perfect, but for the sake of the unborn innocent children and for the sake of future, it is always safer for one to marry his/her tribe.

Remember, u are dating or married to a guy/lady from another tribe and enjoying it now that u two are young doesn't mean all is well or that all will be well.

What happens when an eventuality occurs? How will u handle the crises?

How many igbo ladies married to an Hausa man would agree to go and live permanently in Kano/Sokoto forever Will you allow his kids to be visiting their often as their hometown should their father die

Same question goes to Yoruba, Hausa, Ijaw, Bini, etc tribes' wishing to marry from another tribe.

Imagine u are a Yoruba lady married to Anambra man and the man decides to take a chieftaincy title that demands that his lolo, u the wife would do certain things u don't do in Yoruba land...will u cope? Or just pretend to like it for the time-being

If he dies tomorrow, will u still be visiting Anambra with his kids as much as u do when he was alive or will u denounce Anambra and divert the childrens' attention to Yoruba land

Pls my brothers and sisters, before u make any marital decision, think ahead...stop thinking only about now: he loves me, he treats me well now...what about 20years from now? What about when death strikes?

Are u ready to accept all his culture and tradition with joy till death do you part?

Marriage is not Mills and Boon tales o...marriage involves: family, tribesmen, culture, belief, tradition, etc to stand the test of time. Don't make your decision because u saw one Ijaw man married to Hausa lady in the city and always looking happy together....wait until crises occurs cos they are bound to occur in every marriage.

Inter-tribal marriages hardly survive marital crises...it always lead to breakup or more crises.

Make una shine una eyes o, long live Chelsea

ichidodo: I think what you really mean is to have a successful marriage ,you gotta know everything about the better half via enquiries and who doesn't know better enquries can be made when the two familes are in close proximity.Since this is a serious matter why gamble your future with other peoples except like the guy you were havin a debate with who is hell bent on marryin outside,your future don't amount to too much.

you gatrit Ichi

there is nothing wrong in settling with someone from another tribe..........think we should learn to accept people for who the are not where they are from....that being said everyone has the right to choose who he/she wants to settle with on what so ever bases they desire......like myself i want an igbo girl not just because i am from the east, my reason could be that i just love hearing a tender and feminine voice speaking the language and i think its lovely..........does that make me a tribalist.......NO

DailyNews:

Inter-tribal marriages hardly survive marital crises...it always lead to breakup or more crises.

I guess inter-tribal marriages make up 90% of divorce cases according to you? smh

If this was a project topic you failed woefully.

Not only did I marry outside my tribe. Married outside my race. Very glad I did.

Y'all should have an open mind, and see how love will find you.

True talk

It's not a race or competition but hw happy you are

vivianc:

taa gbafuo! You sef wey broke pass me dey talk.

How you dey jare?

Ehnnn... Me broke? Chai!!!! I don suffer! I'm good dear and u?

ogugua88:

A generalization isn't a basic understanding. "Naija girls sleep around anyhow" is a common generalization on this forum. Would you call that a basic understanding?

Someone is calling you and your brothers stingy and you are agreeing lol. Sure, there are exceptions. It doesn't mean that generalization should be swallowed or accepted though. I don't believe in generalizations. There's no such thing as a valid generalization. There's only lack of enlightenment or knowledge.

so because you live in the US, that makes you more knowledgeable and enlightened that we in Nigeria. Taa gbafuo gi there. Ihukwa alika na inyi muscle.

So miss i too know, tell me, how exactly is statistics used in researches? I bet when they want to study Uniben students, they study all of them one by one huh? So since its impossible because of let's say due to large population or its operational cost, when they study a sample of the population, their findings should be discarded cos "there's only lack of knowledge and enlightenment."

There is nothing like valid generalization, huh? but there is something like valid findings? Yes! Provided the findings are based on un-biasness, non-error, etc. It is valid. If these valid findings can be relied on in making decisions, it is reliable.

I called typical igbo guys stingy, egocentric and difficult, hell yes they are. With exceptions to those that didn't spend their entire lives in igboland, say maybe those in the diaspora.

Go to Main Market, osha and Ariaria, Aba, get a sample from these areas and a sample from Igbo guys who have stayed outside Igboland and study them, simples. The findings will never be the same because of some environmental factors.
People of all tribes have their unique flaws. But how dare me point the ones i know out, right? Yorubas and Hausas have their own flaws too but i don,t know. I haven't studied them. I know a couple of yoruba and Hausa people but they don't constitute enough sample size for me.

Nne, you really need to get off your highhorse, cos contrary to what you feel about yourselve, you don't know it all. Sometimes, you don't even come close.

.......

Yes OOOOOO. This thread just spoke my mind have always wanted to explore beyond my own tribe/state.....I will gladly accept, yes am even working towards it