Sepp360: are u tryin to tell us dat u keep "total" good company?

Anyways, u dont need to agree with her totally. Just take the reasonable and candid advice if u wish.

EbolaParasite:

Therein lies the problem. Some of you think Motherhood is beans abi.
The fulfillment from MOTHERHOOD and being able to RAISE something that started as a spec of s.e.m.en is unquantifiable. The same way you are excited about your CAREER is the same way others are excited about RAISING CHILDREN. The fact that you think wanting to get married and having kids means having little to no ambition makes me question your so-called education and career interest. A KNOWLEDGEABLE PERSON WOULD NEVER SAY SUCH.

MOTHERHOOD TRUMPS any rubbish career you want to make up. The only people i have respect for are the ones that DO BOTH.
If you think having a career means you have some sort of ambition or are better than women who chose to raise babies, PLEASE DO THE WORLD A FAVOUR and TEAR YOUR CERTIFICATE

LaurelP: Hmmm
Thank God say na woman talk am
If its me now, they will say am lady-centric (sic)!
#wateva dat means

majekdom2: how come we have got females taking lead in politics.GENDER inequality I ll say is a thing of the past in NIGERIA. I have seen companies reject male candidates and go for the females..... its the youth of these days ... unserious , I mean both male and female.

donroxy: I just don't like a girl who is unreasonable and leeches , I will dump her 1trillion times even with few cash for her to just go and lemme be !!!

majekdom2: the family is the responsibility of the both of you.there are ways to train kids without jeopardising the dreams of ur wfe.

sauer:

You have provided all the reasons most of them chicken out. I typically don't see women as the weaker se.x, personally. But there has to be a reason why they are historically known as such. Only very, very, very few women have that strong stomach to bear the consequences they could face. And clearly, it's not by wishing it; it's by walking the talk.

The ones i know who walk this talk hardly talk about it. They have no reason to. It's more about self-awareness than it is about talking. Talk is after all cheap.

rickkid:
As a woman, you are the foundation of human civilisation, I.e a mother; the person who brings lives into existence. It is a woman's job to create and mould human beings, which is the most important job on the planet. It is also her job to take care of the home which those little humans live in. It is a man's job to provide the resources to make sure that those little beings and their mother are catered for. Full stop.

thandii1:

Apart from the fact that You have comprehension issues, you are slow. Apparently, The ebola virus has eaten deep into your brain which made you miss where I said fulfillment is subjective and I would have had no issues with their choices if only they let me be too and stopped looking down on my own choice too.

Go and reread my last paragraph again, this time with a non-infested brain.

And DO ME A FAVOUR if you still don't get it, go and replace that mass of sheet you call brain.

Onegai: Try telling this to even men of nowadays.

I got a job last year (very prestigious if not big on salary, could make my career) that took me out of Lagos for less than 2 months. My bf started avoiding my calls and broke up with me on the phone after, saying "oh I can't give you what you want, you were gone, I felt neglected, blah blah". I hissed (okay I pretended to be upset to make him feel guilty ) and moved on.

Next guy who came toasting, I was working long hours on and off in Lagos, maybe 2-3 days a week, other days I'd be home. He started complainig about "so is this how it will be after marriage??" We were not even dating sef.

Current bobo, I'm slowly training him to leave me over weekends to give me space, he's not too happy.

Everyone asks women "when are you getting married?" One relative declared to me (when I told her about something I had achieved) "the crown on a woman's head is Marriage".

When Society and Nigerian men expect you as a woman to be constantly available at their beck-and-call, you're not going to be motivated to achieve much.

You cannot have it all. Every hour you spend worrying about your business is an hour away from your loved ones, every hour you spend with your loved ones is an hour away from making money. What you can do is achieve a balance, maybe 60-40 in whatever way you choose.

ayusco85: Well don't blame the girls o, blame the society they found themselves in. They made marriage seem like the ultimate goal for every lady. That has beclouded lots of girls who don't even know what they can achieve because they are only looking forward to finish schl and get married.

xp17: modern families always grow up to regret one thing they should have done "i wish I had more time with the kids"

although, I hate stereotyping, but you ll agree with me that the kids open up more with their mum than their dad. sir, there are things you can't change. a man does his chore better outdoor, while a woman does her's better indoor, just like the arms of government, where they have separation of power, everyone to his area of specialization.

this is the reason our parents where able to live together till death, one was dishing out orders while the order was obeying, unlike these days where everyone is giving out order and no one is ready to obey.

do what ever is okay for you. as for me, don't worry yourself, because I'm uncivilized and I'll stick to the old ways.

samsolite: OP, the answer to your observation lies in this thread. How many ladies have contributed already to this discussion compared to the guys?

I've observed on this forum that the ladies take exception to such topics offering valuable advice, most especially when its from a lady; but if it were a topic about the most handsome dude on Nairaland or such trivialities you see them flock in their numbers and the thread count going to the 21st page in a day!

EbolaParasite:

Getting angry and raining curses will not change the truth. You look down on women who raise babies and they look down on you with a career. Shikena.

EbolaParasite:

Therein lies the problem. Some of you think Motherhood is beans abi.
The fulfillment from MOTHERHOOD and being able to RAISE something that started as a spec of s.e.m.en is unquantifiable. The same way you are excited about your CAREER is the same way others are excited about RAISING CHILDREN. The fact that you think wanting to get married and having kids means having little to no ambition makes me question your so-called education and career interest. A KNOWLEDGEABLE PERSON WOULD NEVER SAY SUCH.

MOTHERHOOD TRUMPS any rubbish career you want to make up. The only people i have respect for are the ones that DO BOTH.
If you think having a career means you have some sort of ambition or are better than women who chose to raise babies, PLEASE DO THE WORLD A FAVOUR and TEAR YOUR CERTIFICATE

melissa429: Thank u for wakin me up,actualy nid 2 retink afta my so cald fiance pregnanted anoda gal,nid to get bizi makin moni,men ar jus a waste of tym nd resourseful tinkin

EbolaParasite:

Therein lies the problem. Some of you think Motherhood is beans abi.
The fulfillment from MOTHERHOOD and being able to RAISE something that started as a spec of s.e.m.en is unquantifiable. The same way you are excited about your CAREER is the same way others are excited about RAISING CHILDREN. The fact that you think wanting to get married and having kids means having little to no ambition makes me question your so-called education and career interest. A KNOWLEDGEABLE PERSON WOULD NEVER SAY SUCH.

MOTHERHOOD TRUMPS any rubbish career you want to make up. The only people i have respect for are the ones that DO BOTH.
If you think having a career means you have some sort of ambition or are better than women who chose to raise babies, PLEASE DO THE WORLD A FAVOUR and TEAR YOUR CERTIFICATE

jennylove7575: you are right in ur argument but I question, would u allow ur wife to go into politics if she chooses to? Of course many naija men would not allow their wife to go into politics because of fear of another man pinching their wife on the buttocks. Or sexing their wife...they dread such exposures...therefore they prefer the woman to stay at home to look after the kids.

niggereyez: OP... sorry but I don't totally agree wit u. if u keep the right company (no offence intended), u'll know that there are many more visionary women in our society today..
truelly, gone are those days when women are satisfied being just housewives.

rickkid:
Lol she is an "educated Black woman".

When we just listen to any rubbish white people say and blindly follow, this is what happens.

Because some oyinbo lesbian started a movement in the 60s demonising motherhood and characterising stay-at-home mums as "lazy non-achievers", our army of fresh-faced, wide-eyed, naïve people accept this as the Word Of God and start expecting women to do everything men do AND raise a family as well.

Nature did NOT design it that way. Full stop.

A woman is the foundation of human civilisation. If everyone on earth was a man, humanity goes extinct in 1 generation! Don't you guys get it?? A woman is more than just a human being with a vag.ina - she is the human race itself! Each one of us came to earth through a woman. Giving birth and raising children is the most important job on earth! Without a woman to give birth and raise children, there is no corporate ladder, there is no career, there is no economy, there is no politics, there is NOTHING.

Don't you guys get it already?! You have been brainwashed to look down on what is the most important thing on earth for gods sake, what is wrong with you people!!!

Anyway my fiance and I already know the score. 3 years of 2 of us working after marriage, then once the kids start coming, she is staying at home to give my children 6 months exclusive breastfeeding and raise them. No nannies, creche or wicked housegirl. Yes I will have to work like a slave to take care of all of us, but all I'm doing is making money - she is moulding our next generation! Is there anything on earth that is more important than that?

sheniqua:

Rubbish!
The number of wealthy men in Nigeria is negligible and for the few wealthy ones, no be woman go marry them?
Will they marry themselves?

Most Nigerian women work even after marriage so I have no clue what this is about

Horayce:
my english teacher would still nail u for redundancy
@ topic, this isn't peculiarly nigerian;women everywhere are faced with samey problems and simply do not push as far as men. i do not blame them.

EbolaParasite:

Here's my problem with your statement - You make it seem like the ultimate goal of going to school is TO WORK in the corporate world.
The reason girls are sent to school is to get an EDUCATION and ACQUIRE KNOWLEDGE.
If she chooses to be an Educated Housewife - so be it. The most important thing is that she is not an ILLITERATE.
Educated Women help marriages blossom. Some housewives help their husbands do their accounting etc.
The so-called boutique you are criticizing is not a bad idea at all. What is wrong with the hubby getting the wife a boutique and she puts her education into good use and turns a 50,000 naira boutique to a multi-million naira franchise?

I know a woman who opened a store and started selling groceries as a housewife with her husband's initial investment. The husband worked for an oil company that starts with "S" and they were very comfortable. She grew the store to a multi-million naira outfit that they both run today. Husband is now retired.

Not everyone will be a lawyer, engineer, doctor etc. There is nothing wrong with women chosing to get married. You can chose to be career and oriented and be a Condolezza rice or maintain a balance between both and be a Hilary Clinton or chose to have a happy family while you raise your kids like the numerous women around. Nothing wrong with it.

thandii1:

I get you, but One can also wish before walking the talk. Don't you think? Lol

rickkid:
Lol she is an "educated Black woman".

When we just listen to any rubbish white people say and blindly follow, this is what happens.

Because some oyinbo lesbian started a movement in the 60s demonising motherhood and characterising stay-at-home mums as "lazy non-achievers", our army of fresh-faced, wide-eyed, naïve people accept this as the Word Of God and start expecting women to do everything men do AND raise a family as well.

Nature did NOT design it that way. Full stop.

A woman is the foundation of human civilisation. If everyone on earth was a man, humanity goes extinct in 1 generation! Don't you guys get it?? A woman is more than just a human being with a vag.ina - she is the human race itself! Each one of us came to earth through a woman. Giving birth and raising children is the most important job on earth! Without a woman to give birth and raise children, there is no corporate ladder, there is no career, there is no economy, there is no politics, there is NOTHING.

Don't you guys get it already?! You have been brainwashed to look down on what is the most important thing on earth for gods sake, what is wrong with you people!!!

Anyway my fiance and I already know the score. 3 years of 2 of us working after marriage, then once the kids start coming, she is staying at home to give my children 6 months exclusive breastfeeding and raise them. No nannies, creche or wicked housegirl. Yes I will have to work like a slave to take care of all of us, but all I'm doing is making money - she is moulding our next generation! Is there anything on earth that is more important than that?

safarigirl: this is true to some extent. But a woman with a future ambition prepares herself while in school. I know a girl that studies Economics, but attends a Korean language lesson while at it, this is to diversify herself. She recently returned from a trip to South Korea courtesy of those classes. She does some Ushering work as well so this has exposed her to a number of people. I doubt someone like her would encounter much problem in the job search. She must have made acquaintances with those who will assist her in a job search after school.

Emmalot121: Mumus and dimwits,that do not think God exist,just find a means of tanishing image of religion, just to confuse themselves that a universe as mighty as this has no creator.Did you read the bible where it said:Let he who does not work not eat. I downloaded quran and read where it said women have the reward for their labour.Stop this nonsense.If you believe God does not exist,hide your tought and live your life.
You can say religion,societal love for women and our beautiful culture has some little loopholes that help women to shelter because of the situation in society.GO BACK TO HELL YOU CAME FROM.