3cycle:
Well lucky her...
During my service year I discovered that my calling was in the field of business.
I made big money reselling chickens I bought from a farm faraway from town. (I never knew that the returns were rewarding when you invest in poutry)

With my little ideas about raising chickens I went home to beg for little support from my dad to start a poutry farm(the land was available) but forwhere he declined. He was scared that I might make so much money and refuse to get married whereas my brother was "settled" handsomely to start his company.

Except you are a very strong woman who can't succumb to pressure, I tell you being a single career woman is a difficult thing in Nigeria.

xp17: modern families always grow up to regret one thing they should have done "i wish I had more time with the kids"

although, I hate stereotyping, but you ll agree with me that the kids open up more with their mum than their dad. sir, there are things you can't change. a man does his chore better outdoor, while a woman does her's better indoor, just like the arms of government, where they have separation of power, everyone to his area of specialization.

this is the reason our parents where able to live together till death, one was dishing out orders while the order was obeying, unlike these days where everyone is giving out order and no one is ready to obey.

do what ever is okay for you. as for me, don't worry yourself, because I'm uncivilized and I'll stick to the old ways.

dancok: I agree with ur point to be single career lady in nigeria is not easy,many men will run frm u just because u earn money and d career the reason is because many of this single career ladies has spoil their v point before they earn that post,their have been used by this higher profile boss,so I think that is d reason why most men reject single career lady and go after low lifer lady in most cases.

safarigirl: If you're one who has stayed within the female hostel of any Nigerian University, you'll find that most of it's occupants share similar hopes and dreams- and no, it's not to excel in their chosen career paths.

One of the lecturers in my school aptly described women as 'a waste of education'...no, it wasn't an insult, it was just stating the obvious. You find a woman who has hustled through primary, secondary and University education. One who looked set to be a force to reckon with in the world of business or law or medicine, I mean a female with straight A's and you think Nigerian women may be getting things right, only to follow her back to her hostel and hear these heart-breaking words:

"Omo, after school na to find husband marry remain."

In the real sense of the word this is translated to:

"After school, I'll fling my degee inside one iron box in my dad's storeroom, find a perfect mugu that will put a ring on my finger, buy me a car, set up a boutique/beauty saloon for me and all I have to do to get this is spread my legs for him and push out little people with his DNA"

Nigerian women view marriage the same way hustling Nigerian men view the US Green Card- an avenue to escape life's troubles. So in the same way you find 23 year old Nigerian men marrying 56 year old American women, you find young, promising women relegated to some man's priority list.

I don't think most Nigerian women realise that nobody wants to get attached to a leech. If you allow some Nigerian women, they would even want their husbands to carry the babies and birth them as well. And when you ask why they don't want to build wealth with a man, you hear:

"I've already suffered in my father's house. I don't want to continue suffering in my husband's house"

Now unless you're getting married to a no-good leech like yourself, there is no reason why building wealth with a man should be termed 'suffering'

Even on Sun Newspaper's 'Beauty Of The Week' it's the same thing.

Future Ambition: Getting Married And Having Kids

If you think God put you on this earth to make a liability of yourself, you need to think again. There is more to life than being someone's baby mama. There is a purpose for getting an education that lies beyond being able to speak good english whenever you and your man attend social functions

Nigerian women need to sit down and re-evaluate their lives. God sent you to assist a man, not to add to his problems. Men appreciate women who can think for themselves, who want to contribute to the family (and I don't mean churning out kids). There is nothing more endearing than a smart woman who views men as companions rather than money bags.


Don't waste the education your parents worked so hard to provide for you. Break the stereotype, Nigerian women should be more than gold-digging leeches. If the likes of Oby Ezekwesili, Joke Silva, NOI can be successful career women as well as wives and mothers, then we all need to dust up our certificates and CVs and have proper future ambitions.


God Bless You...and don't take this the wrong way

rickkid:
Lol she is an "educated Black woman".

When we just listen to any rubbish white people say and blindly follow, this is what happens.

Because some oyinbo lesbian started a movement in the 60s demonising motherhood and characterising stay-at-home mums as "lazy non-achievers", our army of fresh-faced, wide-eyed, naïve people accept this as the Word Of God and start expecting women to do everything men do AND raise a family as well.

Nature did NOT design it that way. Full stop.

A woman is the foundation of human civilisation. If everyone on earth was a man, humanity goes extinct in 1 generation! Don't you guys get it?? A woman is more than just a human being with a vag.ina - she is the human race itself! Each one of us came to earth through a woman. Giving birth and raising children is the most important job on earth! Without a woman to give birth and raise children, there is no corporate ladder, there is no career, there is no economy, there is no politics, there is NOTHING.

Don't you guys get it already?! You have been brainwashed to look down on what is the most important thing on earth for gods sake, what is wrong with you people!!!

Anyway my fiance and I already know the score. 3 years of 2 of us working after marriage, then once the kids start coming, she is staying at home to give my children 6 months exclusive breastfeeding and raise them. No nannies, creche or wicked housegirl. Yes I will have to work like a slave to take care of all of us, but all I'm doing is making money - she is moulding our next generation! Is there anything on earth that is more important than that?

majekdom2: the fake life style ..... but I have met some great naija chics really who have got stuffs to offer.... its about majority of the youths of these days really.

alaladakosta: But Seriously yoruba men are are lazy, low life , losers. They don't have no future plans, am not saying all of them, cus am Yoruba. But many of them give up easily.

Shutout to ma ibo brothers, men nigga can go any lent to make a change. Drug, rituals name it.

sirjohnson:

You are a marafuka

dancok: I agree with ur point to be single career lady in nigeria is not easy,many men will run frm u just because u earn money and d career the reason is because many of this single career ladies has spoil their v point before they earn that post,their have been used by this higher profile boss,so I think that is d reason why most men reject single career lady and go after low lifer lady in most cases.

jpphilips:

You are still a student shaa, when you graduate, your eyes go clear!!
Men who are not top choices for most women will agree with you,
women who have married real men that transformed them from a teacher's daughter to a "chairlady" will laugh at you.
men who dont care who the liability is because they have more than enough to throw around, may not even understand you.
Boys who are losers that could not or have not made it in life, while patiently waiting for a working lady to contribute to run the home, while their families use family support program to solemnize them in unholy matrimony will give you a standing ovation.

If you have not experienced life and its challenges, your opinion count for nothing till you wear the shoes of others. people like you think that School is an authomatic ticket to a carreer abi? it is only time will tell and pray you dont get pregnant for a man in desperation for marriage when reality comes knocking.
please it is only struggling men that want career ladies, there are many of them here on nairaland, made men are actually looking for liabilities the reason they extend their magnanimity to extended families.
Most educated wives sit at home not because they want to lock up their certificate like you alleged, but because they cannot even get a job, you think that getting a job as a young woman in Nigeria is easy? when employers now decide when to marry, where to marry, when to have kids, how many kids to have etc?
you are a freaking student who knows next to nothing what lies ahead of you, by the time this phantasmagoria in your head clears, you will beg to become that liability you so despise.
NOI you referred to attended Oxford University, which one are you attending? that is where her career started, hope by now you can plot a parabola of where yours is leading to. you think say life in Nigeria na beans!!

rickkid:
With all due respect, you don't know me at all. I come from a family where my mum actually used to make nearly 3 times my dad's income. We live in a very lovely place in an exclusive part of town and I can tell you that 2/3 of the money that built this place came from my mum's business back in the day. But as soon as she had her 4th child and the other 3 were approaching that difficult age, and my dad started having health challenges, she voluntarily shut her business and came home to raise her kids and look after her husband's health.
Today he is doing far better than she ever did and all her kids are grown up so some people look at her and assume she is just some lucky trophy wife who married the lotto jackpot and is a leech on a wealthy man, they don't know the background.

Having seen this with my two eyes, I can never look down on a woman who chooses to look after her family full time. My fiancee and I have even discussed this and we have agreed that 3 years after marriage, we will have our first child and she will stop full time work. I know what I gained from always having a parent around when I was little. Before I turned 3, I was already reading fluently and by 12 I was winning nationwide contests ahead of people 4 years my senior. That's what having a full time parent gives you and it's a pity so many of you just don't seem to understand the value of exclusive motherhood.

kalufelix: Men!
Watch out for these same men pushing the ladies...

The basic of life is lost

#sitting in one corner to see where humanity ends up as long as my breathe permits...

jpphilips:

You are still a student shaa, when you graduate, your eyes go clear!!
Men who are not top choices for most women will agree with you,
women who have married real men that transformed them from a teacher's daughter to a "chairlady" will laugh at you.
men who dont care who the liability is because they have more than enough to throw around, may not even understand you.
Boys who are losers that could not or have not made it in life, while patiently waiting for a working lady to contribute to run the home, while their families use family support program to solemnize them in unholy matrimony will give you a standing ovation.

If you have not experienced life and its challenges, your opinion count for nothing till you wear the shoes of others. people like you think that School is an authomatic ticket to a carreer abi? it is only time will tell and pray you dont get pregnant for a man in desperation for marriage when reality comes knocking.
please it is only struggling men that want career ladies, there are many of them here on nairaland, made men are actually looking for liabilities the reason they extend their magnanimity to extended families.
Most educated wives sit at home not because they want to lock up their certificate like you alleged, but because they cannot even get a job, you think that getting a job as a young woman in Nigeria is easy? when employers now decide when to marry, where to marry, when to have kids, how many kids to have etc?
you are a freaking student who knows next to nothing what lies ahead of you, by the time this phantasmagoria in your head clears, you will beg to become that liability you so despise.
NOI you referred to attended Oxford University, which one are you attending? that is where her career started, hope by now you can plot a parabola of where yours is leading to. you think say life in Nigeria na beans!!

GodMode:

The parents u described are parents with ambitions and plans it has nothing to do with motherhood...

majekdom2: ain't rubbish .... YOU SHOULD COMPREHEND PROPERLY. SHE NEVER SAID WOMEN SHOULDN'T MARRY WEALTHY MEN. SHE IS ONLY OF THE OPINION OF WOMEN BRINGING SOMETHING TO THE TABLE. OFFERING SOMETHING TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE NOT JUST UR BODY AND KIDS.

xp17: hats off for you sire.
I had an uncle, till death he never ate any stale food. he doesn't do either microwaved or cooler foods. when he gets home, his wife knows what to do, she goes straight to the pot to serve him directly from the pot "as it dey hot so".

wealthy men want liability, that is so true. only an average Joe talks about gender equality.

GodMode:

Yes, her making her own money cos if u die before your time hard times will hit the family.

Imagine your line of thought, so how many kids will you have? lemme guess, 15, because boko haram is now killing in tens? why dont you have 25 in case 18 dies?
why do you want to enter a vehicle? dont you know it crashes and people will die? It is only in finance that you need a contingency plan in case the man dies, do you want to kill your husband?
the guy you quoted just told you the mind of most real men, all those ''I want working class ladies'' are husslers looking for who will split their responsibilities with them. guys who their wives contribute NEPA bill.

Mondisweets: wtf!!! Are those boutiques and saloons not bringing back more than what the husband invested in the first place? I pray Nigerian women keep taking more jobs and see if they will even consider you lot for marriage ever again!!!

jpphilips:

Imagine your line of thought, so how many kids will you have? lemme guess, 15, because boko haram is now killing in tens? why dont you have 25 in case 18 dies?
why do you want to enter a vehicle? dont you know it crashes and people will die? It is only in finance that you need a contingency plan in case the man dies, do you want to kill your husband?
the guy you quoted just told you the mind of most real men, all those ''I want working class ladies'' are husslers looking for who will split their responsibilities with them. guys who their wives contribute NEPA bill.
If at all my woman will work, she just has to work for me, to maximize her potentials in marriage , why on earth would a lousy bank be utilizing my wife's effort while my own buisness is going down?

safarigirl: If you're one who has stayed within the female hostel of any Nigerian University, you'll find that most of it's occupants share similar hopes and dreams- and no, it's not to excel in their chosen career paths.

One of the lecturers in my school aptly described women as 'a waste of education'...no, it wasn't an insult, it was just stating the obvious. You find a woman who has hustled through primary, secondary and University education. One who looked set to be a force to reckon with in the world of business or law or medicine, I mean a female with straight A's and you think Nigerian women may be getting things right, only to follow her back to her hostel and hear these heart-breaking words:

"Omo, after school na to find husband marry remain."

In the real sense of the word this is translated to:

"After school, I'll fling my degee inside one iron box in my dad's storeroom, find a perfect mugu that will put a ring on my finger, buy me a car, set up a boutique/beauty saloon for me and all I have to do to get this is spread my legs for him and push out little people with his DNA"

Nigerian women view marriage the same way hustling Nigerian men view the US Green Card- an avenue to escape life's troubles. So in the same way you find 23 year old Nigerian men marrying 56 year old American women, you find young, promising women relegated to some man's priority list.

I don't think most Nigerian women realise that nobody wants to get attached to a leech. If you allow some Nigerian women, they would even want their husbands to carry the babies and birth them as well. And when you ask why they don't want to build wealth with a man, you hear:

"I've already suffered in my father's house. I don't want to continue suffering in my husband's house"

Now unless you're getting married to a no-good leech like yourself, there is no reason why building wealth with a man should be termed 'suffering'

Even on Sun Newspaper's 'Beauty Of The Week' it's the same thing.

Future Ambition: Getting Married And Having Kids

If you think God put you on this earth to make a liability of yourself, you need to think again. There is more to life than being someone's baby mama. There is a purpose for getting an education that lies beyond being able to speak good english whenever you and your man attend social functions

Nigerian women need to sit down and re-evaluate their lives. God sent you to assist a man, not to add to his problems. Men appreciate women who can think for themselves, who want to contribute to the family (and I don't mean churning out kids). There is nothing more endearing than a smart woman who views men as companions rather than money bags.


Don't waste the education your parents worked so hard to provide for you. Break the stereotype, Nigerian women should be more than gold-digging leeches. If the likes of Oby Ezekwesili, Joke Silva, NOI can be successful career women as well as wives and mothers, then we all need to dust up our certificates and CVs and have proper future ambitions.


God Bless You...and don't take this the wrong way

tochilastborn: Naija women have a genetic mentality WOMENS EDUCATION ENDS IN THE KITCHEN

Most of them have Loose background that has lost Drive.and as such their utmost priority in life is "GET A HUSBAND"
my own post-primary classmate is an example,HER life,purpose and dream is to marry a Business Man and have babies like her mum.

jpphilips:

Imagine your line of thought, so how many kids will you have? lemme guess, 15, because boko haram is now killing in tens? why dont you have 25 in case 18 dies?
why do you want to enter a vehicle? dont you know it crashes and people will die? It is only in finance that you need a contingency plan in case the man dies, do you want to kill your husband?
the guy you quoted just told you the mind of most real men, all those ''I want working class ladies'' are husslers looking for who will split their responsibilities with them. guys who their wives contribute NEPA bill.
If at all my woman will work, she just has to work for me, to maximize her potentials in marriage , why on earth would a lousy bank be utilizing my wife's effort while my own buisness is going down?

Onegai: Try telling this to even men of nowadays.

I got a job last year (very prestigious if not big on salary, could make my career) that took me out of Lagos for less than 2 months. My bf started avoiding my calls and broke up with me on the phone after, saying "oh I can't give you what you want, you were gone, I felt neglected, blah blah". I hissed (okay I pretended to be upset to make him feel guilty ) and moved on.

Next guy who came toasting, I was working long hours on and off in Lagos, maybe 2-3 days a week, other days I'd be home. He started complainig about "so is this how it will be after marriage??" We were not even dating sef.

Current bobo, I'm slowly training him to leave me over weekends to give me space, he's not too happy.

Everyone asks women "when are you getting married?" One relative declared to me (when I told her about something I had achieved) "the crown on a woman's head is Marriage".

When Society and Nigerian men expect you as a woman to be constantly available at their beck-and-call, you're not going to be motivated to achieve much.

You cannot have it all. Every hour you spend worrying about your business is an hour away from your loved ones, every hour you spend with your loved ones is an hour away from making money. What you can do is achieve a balance, maybe 60-40 in whatever way you choose.

Onegai:

You cannot have it all. Every hour you spend worrying about your business is an hour away from your loved ones, every hour you spend with your loved ones is an hour away from making money. What you can do is achieve a balance, maybe 60-40 in whatever way you choose.

majekdom2: bros ,forget that talk .... the fact that you had it hard doesnt mean it not easy for others.the men looking for liabilities are usually the ones these ladies complain cheat on them ....and thats why they cant have a say because they were neveer part of his life. your husband cant make you a chairlady from a tailor or farmer life if he hasnt seen that you got a potential or have you not heard of people that frustrate efforts..... the bottom line is what are you bringing to the table ... No one is saying you should become a lawyer or doctor by all means.