jennylove7575: I don't blame these Nigerian women, the society and their background are parts of the contributing factors.. Nigeria society is masculine dominated society. Men in Nigeria get away with lots of misdeeds against women.. If you look deeply into the societal norms and values you will see clearly that Nigerian women are seen as second class and Nigerian men rules. All these, boils down to the society man made culture and tradition.
90% of Nigerian women learnt from their parent that marriage is the final bustop and procreation caps it all. Therefore, A career ambitious woman is labelled loose, promiscuous, and unmarriageable.
Yes statistics shows that many female Nigerian university undergraduate students don't take studies too seriously because they have lost confidents of pursuing their career further due to their personal believes, mentality and orientation to start a family for security and to have a voice in the society as well as respect.

Mondisweets: so are you going to be one of those "not so rich guys" that will add misery to these women's lives?

sheniqua:

I was torn between thinking the poster was a student or a spinster with no suitors in sight
I chose the latter but you could be right
We have had threads here where men talk about how women have to put up with SE,xual harassment at work in Nigeria especially those in banks and some men would prefer to have their wives at home rather than turning tricks with their bosses and clients to get ahead at work.
Reality never hit am
There are women frying and selling akara and making moi moi and chin chin even here in the USA to make ends meet and someone is talking of fantasies in the air that don't exist.
Nobody is sitting around waiting for a rich men
Where are rich men Nwa nu?
How many are they?

Mondisweets: so are you going to be one of those "not so rich guys" that will add misery to these women's lives?

freecocoa: No we cannot and you are right on jobs not being available(story for another day)

What the OP is actually talking about is how the young girls(most of them) don't actually care about working, believe me, the number of those who hope on a rich man as a meal ticket is way way higher than those who actually have a dream, went to school, tried, couldn't get a job and then decided to settle for a man.

alaladakosta: But Seriously yoruba men are are lazy, low life , losers. They don't have no future plans, am not saying all of them, cus am Yoruba. But many of them give up easily.

Shutout to ma ibo brothers, men nigga can go any lent to make a change. Drug, rituals name it.

haibe:

i dont get this your type of thinking. So if a guy is not so rich, it then means he is adding to the misery of a lady? What's wrong with the lady helping her not so rich husband to become very rich? Why do African ladies think their financial success depend on men, what a backward thinking.

Mondisweets: so basically a Nigerian woman's life should not be based on her dreams or aspiration but rather it should be based on nursing another man's insecurities? how is that having an ambition when its living life to satisfy someone else and neglecting yourself?

dokunbam: Some ladies/women are taking the bull by the horn and breaking grounds

But the larger percentage hmmmm...

I don talk, counsel, persuade, beg sef, cos i like wen someone is creative and doing something meaningful.

some no way, they just want a ready made cash. the money they didnt work for, they cant value it.

One girl in my area i told her to do something with her life, she prefer to follow yahooo boys. soon they give her belle and throw her away.

sheniqua:

How many wives are sitting at home watching fashion police
You just told us your grandma worked to put your dad through school
Isn't she a woman?
Is your mom sitting at home watching fashion police?
How many of your sisters are home watching TV in their husband's house because they refused to work

bayulll01:
the only thing i like about u is ur eloquent and good command of english

sheniqua:

Thank you!
The very examples of Dora Akunyili,NOI and Diezani she gave are all married women with children ( RIP Dora)
Name almost every successful nigerian woman we hear of,most are married with children
Omotola that has graced nairaland pages countless times is an entrepreneur,an actress and a married woman with children
NOI is in her 50s and a grandmother which tell me she married in her early 20s
The Richest Nigerian woman folorunso Alakija is married with children and she didn't get married as a millionaire
When threads of Rita Dominic and Genny come out,it is these same boys hailing this poster that will will tell them to go and marry.

Looks like some people just wake up and start typing without thinking

dancok: I saw u there that is why I quote u.(Winks)

sheniqua:

I said it earlier,if people want to talk about the rot in the society that is a different topic
How many of these boys high giving the OP want to work ?
How many would rather get rich overnight?
Is it not men that get a position with the govt and clean out the treasury in a flash
Everyone wants to be rich quick
Nobody in Nigeria cares about working male or female
Govt workers eat groundnut and drink coke and chat while there ,half the time they are not even there
So who is working?

majekdom2: who does the market business in those days ..... my dad is a seasoned chatered accountant with over 47 years experience. He told me his mum supported his education financially .....it has been there .

majekdom2: lols ... tired of this debate ... in my compound here , I got three housewives who got nothin doing .The just cruise around... its what I have seen. I shouldnt generalise ...but I know this.

haibe:

What kind of dream and aspiration is it to marry a rich man in other to be successful? That is derailing and a very thought of a low self esteemed person. And how does a woman working hard to be successful translate to her satisfying someone else? Isn't it for her own good and her environment? What's the point of acquiring education for years if you do not intend to add to people's live and be an agent of change.

It is really true that some Africans are backward in their thinking, I just don't know who to blame.

freecocoa: No we cannot and you are right on jobs not being available(story for another day)

What the OP is actually talking about is how the young girls(most of them) don't actually care about working, believe me, the number of those who hope on a rich man as a meal ticket is way way higher than those who actually have a dream, went to school, tried, couldn't get a job and then decided to settle for a man.

jpphilips:


I know a lot of offices where a woman can start as a field operative within which she cannot have a child, for the company in question, that period will last for 3.5yrs, before she now ges to the next step.
was Nigerian banks using pregnant women for marketing before now? so how will you allow your wife to get pregnant knowing she is a marketer?
There are some offices you are not entitled to leave until after you have put in a year of service, so where will the maternity leave come from should you get pregnant?
some will tell you that you are entitled to 3months mat leave then half day till six months, they hire another corper to continue her work.
it has to be once in 3yrs. so how many kids will you have in that condition?
my dear the OP doesnt know sh!t what the real world smells like, most women who gave up and stayed at home equally have good reasons, the OP just needs to hear their side of it.
i didnt mention the harassment part did i?
OP is a toddler

Mondisweets: moulded into one thing and expected to act like another

shymexx: Lmao @ thread.

Where is @50calibre? I need to read your opinions before I nuke this thread.

A lot of these naija chics are liabilities. Even the ones with "ambitions" also lack the drive to be successful apart from just aiming to get a good job and retire there. They're mostly redundant and lack the drive to inspire men to greatness. Hence most of them are materialistic, promiscuous, and have absolutely nothing to offer - because they always need men to attain/maintain a certain lifestyle.

sheniqua:

My sister in law was transferred by a bank she works for to another city not minding that she was a married woman with small kids
If she quit her job and stayed home ,the OP and her co travelers would call her a gold digger scared of working abi?

Mondisweets: so basically a Nigerian woman's life should not be based on her dreams or aspiration but rather it should be based on nursing another man's insecurities? how is that having an ambition when its living life to satisfy someone else and neglecting yourself?

Mondisweets: sometimes its better to ask than misinterpret everything, and just go on to blab whatever. She said that Nigerian men expect a woman to work but he shouldn't outshine him, and thats why i asked how that is fulfilling your ambition when its based on someone else's terms. Next time confirm something before arguing for the sake of arguing.

majekdom2: I think seqina isnt seeing this because she is married , not in nigeria too .... its normal for a girl to desire a well to do man but not with you having nothing to offer because a woman has got to be a blessing to a man , assisting and adding to him, then you can make a fruitful life.

majekdom2: lols ... FYI , I love babes that are into politics... what kind of thinkin is that .. that one man would be sleeping with my wife ... hell no . I see beyond that. its just the way some of us reason. there is perfectly wrong with women taking the lead as long as they have got the capability. an intelligent ambitious lady would always come out bright in whatever she does.

Mondisweets: so are you going to be one of those "not so rich guys" that will add misery to these women's lives?

jennylove7575: meaning? Abeg gist me

safarigirl: If you're one who has stayed within the female hostel of any Nigerian University, you'll find that most of it's occupants share similar hopes and dreams- and no, it's not to excel in their chosen career paths.

One of the lecturers in my school aptly described women as 'a waste of education'...no, it wasn't an insult, it was just stating the obvious. You find a woman who has hustled through primary, secondary and University education. One who looked set to be a force to reckon with in the world of business or law or medicine, I mean a female with straight A's and you think Nigerian women may be getting things right, only to follow her back to her hostel and hear these heart-breaking words:

"Omo, after school na to find husband marry remain."

In the real sense of the word this is translated to:

"After school, I'll fling my degee inside one iron box in my dad's storeroom, find a perfect mugu that will put a ring on my finger, buy me a car, set up a boutique/beauty saloon for me and all I have to do to get this is spread my legs for him and push out little people with his DNA"

Nigerian women view marriage the same way hustling Nigerian men view the US Green Card- an avenue to escape life's troubles. So in the same way you find 23 year old Nigerian men marrying 56 year old American women, you find young, promising women relegated to some man's priority list.

I don't think most Nigerian women realise that nobody wants to get attached to a leech. If you allow some Nigerian women, they would even want their husbands to carry the babies and birth them as well. And when you ask why they don't want to build wealth with a man, you hear:

"I've already suffered in my father's house. I don't want to continue suffering in my husband's house"

Now unless you're getting married to a no-good leech like yourself, there is no reason why building wealth with a man should be termed 'suffering'

Even on Sun Newspaper's 'Beauty Of The Week' it's the same thing.

Future Ambition: Getting Married And Having Kids

If you think God put you on this earth to make a liability of yourself, you need to think again. There is more to life than being someone's baby mama. There is a purpose for getting an education that lies beyond being able to speak good english whenever you and your man attend social functions

Nigerian women need to sit down and re-evaluate their lives. God sent you to assist a man, not to add to his problems. Men appreciate women who can think for themselves, who want to contribute to the family (and I don't mean churning out kids). There is nothing more endearing than a smart woman who views men as companions rather than money bags.


Don't waste the education your parents worked so hard to provide for you. Break the stereotype, Nigerian women should be more than gold-digging leeches. If the likes of Oby Ezekwesili, Joke Silva, NOI can be successful career women as well as wives and mothers, then we all need to dust up our certificates and CVs and have proper future ambitions.


God Bless You...and don't take this the wrong way

freecocoa: No we cannot and you are right on jobs not being available(story for another day)

What the OP is actually talking about is how the young girls(most of them) don't actually care about working, believe me, the number of those who hope on a rich man as a meal ticket is way way higher than those who actually have a dream, went to school, tried, couldn't get a job and then decided to settle for a man.