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Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? - Romance (8) - Nairaland

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Should I Confront The Husband? / My GF Is Cheating On Me With A Soldier, I Want 2go To The Barrack & Confront Him / Should I Confront Her Or Shut Up And Keep Bleeping Her (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Benilily(f): 8:02am On Feb 26, 2015
pwerrymansion:
this is the most stupid post I've come across in decades! My dear run as fast as your leg can carry you.
that post wasn't silly, i think u lack the ability to understand the point the guy was trying to make... If she quits now, how sure are you that her next won't be worst?? Men are polygamous in nature so i still think she should talk things over with her guy in matured manner and not running away like a fustrated coward!

2 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by 100Cents: 8:03am On Feb 26, 2015
pwerrymansion:
this is the most stupid post I've come across in decades! My dear run as fast as your leg can carry you.

Keep quiet.

Destroyer..

1 Like

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Eberex(m): 8:04am On Feb 26, 2015
oya o! where is the OP. atleast by now she should tell us what she has done about it, or shey she don pack her things comot for house?
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Epimetheus(m): 8:04am On Feb 26, 2015
Jonathan:

IT'S SO UNFORTUNATE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN DATING THE WRONG GUYS.
Useless advise.
Not every guy out there are like the guys you have had experience with.

You failed to understand her. She wasn't saying every guy out there are like the guys she's been dating. She was only saying most guys out there are like that.
Sometimes it helps to think like a gambler. Life's a gamble. And before sentimentalists start crying heresy, the bible agrees with something like "time and chance happens to them all".
Now, if your chance of finding the perfect guy was 1 in 10, and that of getting a 'good guy' is 5 in 10, what would you put your wager on?
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by UjSizzle(f): 8:05am On Feb 26, 2015
Some of the comments here make me shudder sad


Anyway, it's pretty close to your marriage so I think this guy's either testing you to gauge the level of trust you have in him, or pretty much trying to get out of marrying you.

If it's the former then damn he's good. Play it out well. It's nice you're coming here for help and not just mouthing off at him. Ask if a friend came over when you were away. Then calmly ask about the used condoms in your kitchen.

If it's the latter, then I suggest you pack up and leave. Dude isn't interested in marrying you or is just plain stupid.

And all these men telling us men are 99% unfaithful, God is watching all of you. The things you say to excuse infidelity makes marriage seem like hell. Thank God there are honest men still existing.

6 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Meringe(m): 8:06am On Feb 26, 2015
seseannie:
Tnx for your responses bt I was nt snopping on him. I came back n he complained of hunger I went inside the kitchen to cook n I saw the condoms. I knw some men cheat bt at least they respect their partners throwing away the condoms would have been a better idea
My dear, don't listen to all those telling you to walk away. Confront him in a matured way, see how he reacts to it. Find out if he has respect for a woman, not just you. If he does, you are secured. But if he doesn't, you can consider the next option.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Nobody: 8:07am On Feb 26, 2015
searching4love:




SO YOU SAW TWO USED CONDOMS PROVES WHAT DID YOU MET HIM ON TOP OF ANOTHER WOMAN IF I WERE THE GUY I WILL SEND U PACKING LIKE A PIECE OF GARBAGE. IF YOU CAN'T TRUST HIM IN LITTLE THINGS THEN YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE A WIFE undecided IF WE DIG DEEP INTO YOUR AFFAIRS NOW YOU WILL SURELY HAVE OTHER GUYS SHINING YOUR CONGO TOO undecided SO WHATS THE FUSS ABOUT MANY OF YOU GIRLS THINK YOU CAN EAT YOUR CAKE AND HAVE IT. AFTER SO MANY YEARS OF SLEEPING WITH VARIOUS MEN ALL IN THE NAME OF LOVE, YOU THINK YOU CAN HOOK A NIGGA TO BE THE PERFECT MAN FOR YOU. I DON'T PITY YOU AND IF I WAS THE GUY I WILL BEAT YOU WITH MY BELT BUCKLES BEFORE I THROW YOUR ASS OUT undecided NONSENSE angry
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Olutola88(m): 8:08am On Feb 26, 2015
That's the problem I have with human beings, most of us are never realistic. Just see people forming, pretending, fronting, acting and posting all sorts of fake comments.

98% of the ladies saying they will quit the relationship will actually NOT. And you are here forming one relationship expert.

As for the Ladies claiming they can never marry a man that cheats; Shebi na the person wey u catch u catch! I laugh in Japanese each time I meet ladies that Chant: “ I trust my boyfriend, he dares not look @ another lady” “I'm 100% sure my husband has never had extramarital affair”. YES, it's possible, but don't be too sure.

And for those men on this thread claiming Saint of life, I know some of you are real while some are hypocrites. For the ones that are real, I'll advise you don't give that guy outright judgment cos you don't know where he's coming from.

OP, if you truly love your Fiancé, I'm sure you wouldn't just walk away cos of what you saw. What if you met them in the act?

My Advice: Confront him! I don't mean u should act like you aren't sure he used it. As in, confront him like you caught him in the act. In fact, tell him you cannot put up with a cheat, tell him it's over (But you and I know it's not over cos na just shakara). Wait and see his reaction after your own action. Let's see how remorseful he will be, let's see if he won't even do everytn 2 keep you. Let ur shakara last for about 2 weeks

5 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by dannewlife(m): 8:09am On Feb 26, 2015
Have you considered if he deliberately put the condoms there to test your temper. Men like to know the mood of the woman they are taking to the alter. Be wise.!

1 Like

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Melahou(m): 8:09am On Feb 26, 2015
brito:







You must be a teen for typing this. Go to kids section.

then you must be a grandma for been silly...
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by rman: 8:10am On Feb 26, 2015
fairygeh:
My dear,i am going to be real with you,like a sister,forget all ths pretenses from other girls.
1.Take it or leave it,regardless of the lies he might tell you,your dear bf cheated on you while you were away,yes he fVcked someone else TWICE,it could be disheartening,trust me,you would be bitter, mad,sad especially when you guys are already planning for ur intro,the natural thing you would feel is yea, I wanna leave him,hes a beast,bl bla bla bla.
2.If he's just a boyfriend with no serious plans to get married and he did this ,i wouldn't think twice before saying dump his sorry a**
But I have experienced a lil to know that there is jo perfect guy out there,i wouldn't advise u to leave him because you don't know who the next person u gonna meet if he's actually worse.as for the ladies shouting dump him,leave him,etc,it is girls like them that go about sleeping with already hooked up guys like ur fiance and will only be too happy if you happen to leave him,trust me,we women are our own enemies.trust me if it were their own fiance,they wouldn't leave him like that

You should not have any problem calling ur fiance, do Shakara for him,tell him u already know he is cheating,cause a small rift between u guys,dont forgive easily, let him regret his actions for quite some time, days.make him realize u are.not a fool even when u forgive him.but be sure he is not a serial cheat,that is the only ground you should leave him. because I wouldn't want to to start ur marriage on an unfaithful note.

All the same be prayerful my dear, he might or might not change,let me tell you,except few guys out there,an average guy is prone to do this,its sad really but that's the bitter truth.

At last, one lady that gets it!

This post right there is from a matured and realistic lady. Others are just living in denial or fools paradise. All of them have BFs and men that have never cheated. I laugh. Reality is different from nairaland hypocritical world.


God bless you.

4 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by eleko1: 8:11am On Feb 26, 2015
lipsrsealed embarassed shocked Abeg free that guy biko
Jonathan:

Fool.
You have been jobless and searching for love since 2009.
How can a mentally deformed dumbfùck like you find love?
Oloribu
nor finish am

1 Like

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by donodion(m): 8:11am On Feb 26, 2015
seseannie:
Pls advice me house. I and my boyfriend of 2yrs have fixed a date for our introduction nxt month. And I jst gained admission for my masters programme in another state. I travelled on sunday so that I can start the registration process only for me to come back today n see two used condoms in a nylon inside d kitchen. So many things running in my mind now. I am thinking of quietly quitting the relationship or should I confront him?
Some ppl have guilty conscience to confess and prolly repent.some do not.You are hurt and its ur right to demand why.il suggest this....

Take a break if you can.If hes sincere he will be back,if not let him be.Its even ok you guys are yet to be married.So you too could keep your options open.Nothing wrong in having option B ( most ladies often does anyway). If he wants and deserves you,he would buckle up and might put a ring on it. And if not,move on sis.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Nobody: 8:12am On Feb 26, 2015
Melahou:


then you must be a grandma for been silly...




You are the silly one here, if you don't have anything meaningful to say play with your toys.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by todayguest(m): 8:13am On Feb 26, 2015
pwerrymansion:
this is the most stupid post I've come across in decades! My dear run as fast as your leg can carry you.
are you going to provide her with an angel? What Is wrong with talking with him about it?
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Sunshinelady(f): 8:14am On Feb 26, 2015
BlackPeni5:


Yes..90% but there are 10% of men who are losers and lack confidence. They are faithful simply because they don't have what it takes to woo the hot gals. You seem to fall into this category.

Don't feel bad...every disappointment is a blessing.
. Am truly sorry 4u & sorry 4d woman u ll end up with. Your comment even wreaks of low self esteem. U need to sleep around to validate urself. Not all are psycologically sound in dis world, really.

1 Like

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Etruth: 8:15am On Feb 26, 2015
pwerrymansion:
this is the most stupid post I've come across in decades! My dear run as fast as your leg can carry you.
SECONDED

3 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by DonaldGenes(m): 8:15am On Feb 26, 2015
pwerrymansion:
this is the most stupid post I've come across in decades! My dear run as fast as your leg can carry you.

Cough
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Etruth: 8:16am On Feb 26, 2015
Meringe:
Condom might be used for so many reasons. So you don't just conclude.

Moreover, he's a man. Though I don't support cheating but sincerely I think a man is polygamous in nature, but what matter is that the man in question respects you as a woman.



For your own good, stop sniffing around. If you leave him, how sure are you that your next man wouldn't be worst.

You can confront him in a matured way but have it at the back of your mind that many men cheat even though their wife might be more beautiful than their cheating partner.

Though it takes courage for a man to remain faithful.
PLS EXPLAIN
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by elohorayodele: 8:17am On Feb 26, 2015
Meringe:
Condom might be used for so many reasons. So you don't just conclude.

Moreover, he's a man. Though I don't support cheating but sincerely I think a man is polygamous in nature, but what matter is that the man in question respects you as a woman.



For your own good, stop sniffing around. If you leave him, how sure are you that your next man wouldn't be worst.

You can confront him in a matured way but have it at the back of your mind that many men cheat even though their wife might be more beautiful than their cheating partner.

Though it takes courage for a man to remain faithful.

If he's the one who used it, you won't find them there. Ask if any of his friends came around. Give him benefit of doubt, if he says no Pls confront him, his response should show if you will enjoy or endure your marriage
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Praktikals(m): 8:17am On Feb 26, 2015
[quote author=BlackPeni5 I can confidently tell you that about 90% of men have affairs outside their main relationship..[/quote] Bitter truth.

1 Like

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Olaone1: 8:18am On Feb 26, 2015
UjSizzle:
Some of the comments here make me shudder sad


Anyway, it's pretty close to your marriage so I think this guy's either testing you to gauge the level of trust you have in him, or pretty much trying to get out of marrying you.

If it's the former then damn he's good. Play it out well. It's nice you're coming here for help and not just mouthing off at him. Ask if a friend came over when you were away. Then calmly ask about the used condoms in your kitchen.

If it's the latter, then I suggest you pack up and leave. Dude isn't interested in marrying you or is just plain stupid.

And all these men telling us men are 99% unfaithful, God is watching all of you. The things you say to excuse infidelity makes marriage seem like hell. Thank God there are honest men still existing.

Abi ooo.

Like your husbie? tongue tongue
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Melahou(m): 8:19am On Feb 26, 2015
brito:





You are the silly one here, if you don't have anything meaningful to say play with your toys.

please don't derail this topic...tell them you didn't see me...i don't have time for your nagging today
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Etruth: 8:19am On Feb 26, 2015
Jackeeh:
hmmmmmmm reading through comments uploaded before mine I can't help but wonder: everyone now feel cheating is cool. Men are polygamous in nature, condoms might be used for other reasons( like fetching water), quit snooping around,we are mortals, it must have been used by his friend, don't get him angry when confronting him etc. Why can't men and women strive to be faithful to their partners and quit justifying their evil acts? Being faithful is not impossible. it may be difficult but its attainable. And should you slip and cheat, please don't be smart about it. being defensive and cooking up reasons for cheating ain't cool. when you cheat on your partner, you destroy him or her. if you are caught and instead of being sorry, u feel on top of the world, you reduce your partner to nothing. cheating isn't cool in anyway. be with a partner who makes ur heart beat fast each time u set eyes on him or her. don't settle for less, or money, sex, good looks etc
YOU ARE BLESSED

3 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Smith35(m): 8:19am On Feb 26, 2015
Confront him. Whatever the issue is, talk about it till finish. Since u've had 2yrs on this journey, it can only get better UNLESS he shows respect. No new bf u wanna have doesn't have a skeleton in d closet.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by bosunjohns(m): 8:20am On Feb 26, 2015
Jackeeh:
hmmmmmmm reading through comments uploaded before mine I can't help but wonder: everyone now feel cheating is cool. Men are polygamous in nature, condoms might be used for other reasons( like fetching water), quit snooping around,we are mortals, it must have been used by his friend, don't get him angry when confronting him etc. Why can't men and women strive to be faithful to their partners and quit justifying their evil acts? Being faithful is not impossible. it may be difficult but its attainable. And should you slip and cheat, please don't be smart about it. being defensive and cooking up reasons for cheating ain't cool. when you cheat on your partner, you destroy him or her. if you are caught and instead of being sorry, u feel on top of the world, you reduce your partner to nothing. cheating isn't cool in anyway. be with a partner who makes ur heart beat fast each time u set eyes on him or her. don't settle for less, or money, sex, good looks etc
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Meringe(m): 8:21am On Feb 26, 2015
Etruth:
PLS EXPLAIN
Some use it to masturbate. Don't be surprised, it's real.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Nobody: 8:21am On Feb 26, 2015
seseannie:
Tnx for all ur responses. @ Chaicover he lives alone. He has gone to watch arsenal match I will ask when he returns

OK
I guess you have had the discussion with him by now
Your gut feeling is usually right, so even if he is lying deep in you, you will know

The truth is that as you lay your bed from the start of the relationship whilst courting, you will lie on it when married

My concerns are; one that you dont know how to approach your fiance in times of "trouble" and secondly even if it happens that he brought a friend/relative home who used the condoms, the fact that you didnt know about the people staying over in your fiances house kind of shows that you dont talk much and are not very close to one another.

So regardless of who owns the condoms, there is some disconnect somewhere and you need get that sorted before you even dream of getting married to this man. You may need to court and understand each other more before you decide to get married.

marriage is not a day, month or year affair . .. You are looking at 50 years if God blesses you both with long life. Be very sure of the one you want to give that liberty of taking over your whole life to.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by parrot123: 8:21am On Feb 26, 2015
If you have never done that before, be the first person to cast stone on this man. Woman, don't mind them. Don't allow them to spoil your relationship, call your man and resolve the matter. I am sure he will apologise latter.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by haulagehandlers(m): 8:21am On Feb 26, 2015
pwerrymansion:
this is the most stupid post I've come across in decades! My dear run as fast as your leg can carry you.
No wonder
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by kayzat: 8:22am On Feb 26, 2015
seseannie:
Pls advice me house. I and my boyfriend of 2yrs have fixed a date for our introduction nxt month. And I jst gained admission for my masters programme in another state. I travelled on sunday so that I can start the registration process only for me to come back today n see two used condoms in a nylon inside d kitchen. So many things running in my mind now. I am thinking of quietly quitting the relationship or should I confront him?


Its better you ask your man atleast to ascertain who used the rubber. I am talking from the experience and don't be surprised if at the end of the he's not the one that used the condoms.

But let your senses guide you.
Re: Should I Confront Him Or Walk Away Quietly? by Melahou(m): 8:24am On Feb 26, 2015
pbs4real:
dude dis is nt d ryt response,u and i knw dis. . .

yeah you are right...someone is playing with my account

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