free him nd let him come to you to apologise with an oath never to raise her hands on u, d beaten is much when u re nt a drum set

Do you not have parents?, do you live in his house already if so i think you deserve everything he dishes out to you cos i cannot figure out why he should treat you with respect when you have given yourself to him Cheaply, "he beats you and even strangles you "and you are still seeing him is it his dick that keeps you going back to him if so then there"s nothing Nairalanders can do about it.
Please continue with him because it is obvious you have no better ambitions for yourself other than what you are enjoying under him. Na wetin you sabi chop wan kill you. Stupid girl abeg gerrout.

Abeg Nairaland no dey edit my reply i knew what i was doing.

kofsy:

i was refused a uk student visa based on the point that the mariage certificate i submitted with my application was forged. can i ask the ECO to review my application by sending the embassy a confirmation from the registry that the certificate was not forged?

One of the reasons I love Nairaland. superstory full the place,

^^^ LMAOOOOOOO is it husband or boyfriend

In any relationship there should be no physical abuse. There are many attention seekers on this topic making silly comments about women deserve to be beaten.

My take on this is, why tempt?
We forget that its not only between man and woman that you have weaker persons. A man will not go looking for fight against someone he is sure is stronger and will surely beat him up. Why can't some women adopt that strategy? Am sure there are other ways a woman can make her point without being confrontational. We forget some words are more dangerous than fists.

Am not supporting men beating women, but am saying let the woman help in not making it happen. It is inappropriate to tell a man " there is noting you can do" under any circumstance. The man will go ahead to prove to you that there is something he can do. I have seen where a man killed someone because of that statement. So everybody should be careful how they use their tongue. Its not everyone that has self restraint.

No man should hit a woman not for any reason id advise u forget about this Guy i know its not easy but if he truly did all u said he did u should think very carefully

No one on here would know how you feel until they have been in your shoes.

I can understand your situation because a cousin of mine was in an abusive relationship and she stayed in it thinking she can talk him out of it and change him but she ended up getting killed by the husband. You should not allow it to go to the extent where he says he will kill you. Although you might think it is just words do not be fooled he can possible do it unintentionally.

I know you said you love him and have made great sacrifices in the relationship but please do not stay in there for the sake of love men like that are hard to change. If you have talked to him and he still continues to beat you please leave before it is too late.

Be able to love yourself enough to leave. You should not be in a relationship were you  have to walk on eggshells just because you do not want to anger him.

Do not let death be the last resort of your relationship.

Please walk out of his life and the next time he walks up to you to talk love make sure you run over him with your car. I am assuming that he has so totally screwed you in the head that you can even begin to ask if he will change. Even if by some miracle he does change why would you even want him back. You are not even married to him. Boyfriend ke? Please have respect for your family and leave that animal alone.

u must b a small girl 60kg. Ur backside must b so tiny without any hips. I guess u must b less than 20yrs with that weight.60kg is too poor for an adult lady. U must be a leper, or u arent feeding fine. Drink lots of milk or eat well cooked meat.
As 4 ur guy warn him 2 stop laying hands on u. Keep him silent. If he threaten u again report him 2 d cops

I DON'T WANT TO CAST MY PEARL AMONG PIGS. So, POSTER, if u know u just posted for posting sake, then u probably DESERVE anything u're getting in that relationship. I DON'T SEE THE REASON WHY SOME PEOPLE WILL ASK SERIOUS QUESTIONS LIKE THIS & ASK FOR ADVICE, AND YET WHEN THEY ARE BEING GIVEN THAT ADVICE THEY CLOSE THEIR EYES AND BLOCK THEIR EARS! If you have any sense at all, you better open that brain of yours and take good advise from total strangers that have the heart to care about your welfare. LEAVE THAT BEAST, he DOES NOT love you. Stop having the weird thinking that he's still a child that will have tantrums and later come back. HE IS A GROWN MAN(or is supposed to be one) with enough time to have developed sound thinking. DO NOT WAIT TILL U'RE HISTORY FROM THIS WORLD BEFORE YOU DEVELOP SOUND THINKING YOURSELF. Where is your pride and self worth?? Remove that cloud covering your eyes & see clearly my friend. I bet you have many other people who value you and love you, yet u think this one deserves you more that your family, perhaps?

@Sley4life

No one asked you about her weight. 60kg on a 5"6 girl is not bad

^^^
Na u b the OP? I made my observation. 60kg is poor for a matured lady. She must b in her early 20's maybe the diet isnt okay 4 her.

i think u argue with u him. i only have one thing to say. learn to respect him and not to talk back when he talks

@kenyy
If OP's abusive boyfriend had choked her on their 1st date, then I can assure you there wouldnt have been a 2nd date because she would have left without looking back and even call the cops on him. But abusers spend the initial stage portraying themselves to be near perfect. D girl involvd is then hooked and the abuse starts gradually. Abuse involves psychological games. Before he startd beating her, he has moulded her psyche to the point that she is addicted to him. I dnt want 2 say more than this, kenyy. Pls google 'trauma bond', u wil understand what I'm talking about. OP needs help. She is displaying 'the battered women syndrome'.

Abeg free that guy, he would definitelt kill you one day and any guy who lay hamds on u and u ve not gotten married to him, when you get married e he would kill u one day, forget him and move on. This type always repent but they are not repentant, PLS FREE thE GUY.HE WOULD KILL YOU

u still love him cuz he's handsomely rich abi?

i know thats the reason why u still wanna stay till he killz you.

Ode!

If you want to die, then remain.
You can see the clear signals and yet you say he love you

Amazing

You already made the decision to stay with the dude. Just remember that while it seems hard to move on, all you have to do is make up your mind to do so.
The guy has no self control. He changed drastically from a normal dude to a gf bashing guy. He can change but the likelihood of that happening is low. For him to stop, two things must happen, the source of frustration must be dealt with, and 2. he must demand respect in that relationship.
Something is frustrating him and he is taking it out on you. Do you know what it is? It could be a school or job situation. Or a family situation. Is he seeing someone else and he wants you to go but is too weak to admit it to your face? You need to find out why he suddenly has become annoying. And you need to sit down and talk heart to heart.
You need to let him know you will not tolerate the beatings anymore. You don't want to leave him but you need to,even if it is just for a while. Knowing you have nowhere to go makes him lose respect for you.

Sometimes you have to descend to his level to get some sense into him. From your profile, you seem to be a student in SW Nigeria. You have friends in your area. Next time he beats you, beat him back or do something drastic to him. When he is asleep, strike him with pots, wood and stuff, whatever you can lay your hand on as much as possible. If you are scared, get boys to stay around incase he has the chance to hit you then. Let them beat him as much as he hits you. And warn him, it will be worse if he touches you again. Or you can do the boiling water trick, and run away. He beats you cos he thinks he can get away with it. Tell him it aint so.

From my experiences I'd say chics in these relationships deserve anything that comes to them. Sometimes I think most women have this 'donkey strain' in their DNA that makes them appreciate the abusive guy more. It's almost like there's this kick they get from being kicked. The nice guy who's just trying to do wats right is termed ' mumu' and 'boring'. The bully, on the other hand gets no stress whatsoever. even her girlfrnds who tell her to leave, u find out that they too in her shoes , would do the same thing.  

deniyor:

If you are scared, get boys to stay around incase he has the chance to hit you then. Let them beat him as much as he hits you. And warn him, it will be worse if he touches you again.

Not me man. I personally will never interfere when I c a guy beating his girl and I never advocate for guys to do so. the last time my homie and a few of his buddies did that, the silly girl called the cops on him.

This is attempted murder, Do u want to wait untill he strangle u to death?
What kind of luv or sacrifice hav u made dat u no longer hav value for ur life?
Infact u r so so annoying!! u better reason with ur head & stop living in fantasy dat ur monster bf will change.

report him to the nearest police station

.

I just don't get it.
I don't get the possibility of loving or accepting the love from someone who causes physical damage to their love ones.
This reminds me of Tina Turner's case study. "What has love got to do with it?"
The best advise I've seen on this thread; You can't love someone until you love yourself. I understand that the person that was referring to the abusive man in question. But at the same time, it also applies to you (original poster). If you love yourself, you would do anything in your power to protect your physical and mental identity.

Why do you make yourself so vulnerable? Do you think you can't be loved by another human being?
I offer you my love then. If my love will help you love yourself, I'll be happy to offer it.
No woman should allow herself to be abused.

I've worked with people who found themselves in similar situation as yours, some even raped by their so called boyfriends. I know it's not so easy to walk away as many suggested here. It's never so easy to walk away, but at times, that's the only option.
I know I'm just a cyber identity, but you need a shoulder to lean on, I'll provide mines. I'll be back on this thread, just incase.

Kofsy u r being abused and battered by yo bf.
It is only an immature and I insecure man that strikes a woman and it is only an immature and Insecure woman that put up with it.
He is lucky he lives in 9ja otherwise he would have been charged with assault and battery.
LEAVE HIM NOW. If he beats u while u r in courtship, he will KILL when u ppl get married.
You don't know what love is and he doesn't love u.

Ileke-IdI:

I just don't get it.
I don't get the possibility of loving or accepting the love from someone who causes physical damage to their love ones.
This reminds me of Tina Turner's case study. "What has love got to do with it?"
The best advise I've seen on this thread; You can't love someone until you love yourself. I understand that the person that was referring to the abusive man in question. But at the same time, it also applies to you (original poster). If you love yourself, you would do anything in your power to protect your physical and mental identity.

Why do you make yourself so vulnerable? Do you think you can't be loved by another human being?
I offer you my love then. If my love will help you love yourself, I'll be happy to offer it.
No woman should allow herself to be abused.

I've worked with people who found themselves in similar situation as yours, some even violated by their so called boyfriends. I know it's not so easy to walk away as many suggested here. It's never so easy to walk away, but at times, that's the only option.
I know I'm just a cyber identity, but you need a shoulder to lean on, I'll provide mines. I'll be back on this thread, just incase.

I need a shoulder to lean on

.

i am going to tell you the really truth i actually don't reply on trends but when i saw yours i touched to reply my advice is first leave him for a while and try to hook up with friends or hang around with male friends   or do things that will make you happy so as to forget his memories around you it is better for to be alive than for your obituary to be around town a word is enough for the wise be wise.