Find a working microphone, place the microphone towards his/her mouth. Then place the speaker in a way she can hear anysound she makes when sleeping. You will need to sleep elsewhere during this experiment...

Eeeyahh OP, i know how it feels to be a fool, take heart bro. Sorry bro, i almost cry especially when you said your dick is rising. I know you can't be stupid till you die, God will do something about your stupidity IJN

phylp:

Thanks@all who insisted on me moving on but where will i start from.i gave everything into that relationship. from abiding with No sex policy, didnt cheat on her, supported her financially(though she also reciprocate), wrote the whole of her 400 level project, she has low self esteem but i was always there to encourage her when she's down et.c When i think of her statements, nuffin else enters my brain but why now!!

i swear to God i know how you feel. Be more interactive your friends, or better still, let some close friends live with you for a while. Btw, are you her father?? Why did u invest in her when you don't own her?

I stand to be corrected, i advice according to my instincs.
Married? Firstly marriage is kinda everlasting so you just to forgive and forget even if its hard but let her know how hard it is for you to forgive her. About that 4 kids, you may decide not to allow them in ur aoz since you were not aware b4 marriage and if u are nice enough, allow them(consider ur financial ability). Your wife needs to be idonno, you should just leave her, she didnt tell u bcuz she was afraid of loosing u i guess....

Nice list, has any of your boo did all these to you?

Activityj:
Oga seun, please i beg you find a way and moderate nairaland the more and don't forget to create sections for all the tribal people among us, cus this tribalism of a thing is getting out of hand!

creating different tribe sections is like creating a battle ground for home and away attacks. Imagine other tribe enter your tribe section and start posting nonsense, then one of you will give poster a reply and that is how the tribal war will start

cybertyrant:

Mr dumb head why are u killing urself over someones property, go look for urs, u ar nt seun please when seun comes let him reply me or are u angry am igbo, GEEZ bro u a taking overdose over another persons headache.

seun will give u a reply similar to mine in a very nice way. What do you know about managing a website self? Post this shit on wapmasters section and they will tell you what you don't know. Wait, you call this help? Nigerians only help when you are at the top, when you are still hustling, they will just keep looking at you telling you your idea won't work... SMH, make mod com delete this yeye thread jare

cybertyrant:

My dear i know u dont have a forum so shut up,
Google is a search engine, has a mail, a chat, a store etc, it is only in a black world that things are impossible, u should be grateful or are u jealous ur brother is about to become a billionaire.
This is not the first time igbos are helping people.

do you know what is called a platform, Google have so many platform e.g google, googledrive, googlemap, google+, gmail, adsense, adwords, e.t.c which are different from each other entirely. Adding all these thing to only google.com is just confusion

Obrigardo:
Nna which village you come from sef? You nor know sey nairaland na blog?

lol... Blog?? Any website whey dem dey read na blog... Wait who knows that twitter is a blog?

Let me answer you on behalf of seun, he might answer later.
No1. A forum is different from a social network. Including a chat to a social network cant be accepted by geeks.
No2. This is a forum bro, a game room like that of 2go or what? There is what we call audience target. Majority of members on nairaland are grown ups and how would you expect a grownup to patronise a game room?
No3. Is a better advice
No4. I don't understand the kind of connection you are talking about.
No5. Deleting any users account is just a lame opinion i must confess, so many users registered 2008-2010 and left, they came back 2013-2015 and met their account intact, its realibility bro.
No6. This idea is ok
No7. Is manageable
No8. A chatroom on a forum?? Maybe seun can answer this

No9. Do you know why kids are on 2go, because of star progress. We have little kids on nairaland, a star level won't make any sense

365 days ago..
Around 1:30am, i layed on my bed with one eye fully closed and the other eye half-closed looking at my phone to watch two more episodes of the korean series before going to sleep. At a point in time, i felt like my eye balls were getting bigger and i could bearly read the subtitles. Even my ears were malfunctioning because i heard "sai buhari" like 5 times in that korean series.
The next thing i heard was that the griiiin griiiin of my phone when i discovered its morning already and guess what, it was a birthday text message from a close friend. There is this presentation i had to present at school by 10:00am sharp so i have to be there latest 9:30am. I smiled and look at the wall clock in my room and suddenly the cute smile disappeared. Yeee, Moku, nine twenty (9:20am)!! Sometimes you can't trust wall clocks so i checked my phone. Blood of Jesus, nine thirty (9:30am)!!!.. I shouted and jumped off my bed, ran outside to fetch water when i met mummy bobo. She was a kind of woman that can greet the hell out of one's life. I replied all her statements with "fine" even when she asked, "which course are you studing?" and "do you have lectures this morning?". When i reached where to fetch water, I joined the queue and patiently waited for my turn to fetch. We were not much there, just 9 of us. This made me realise the usefulness of magic. I just wished i were merlin or any of those nollywood witches. As soon as i fetched water, i raced back to my crib. Just as i was about to enter the bathroom, i hit the bucket against the door, glided left and right to save the bucket of water like my life depended on it but the bucket eventually broke and spllllaaaasssshhh, you should understand what happened to the water. I stared at the bucket with all kinds of magical thoughts. I thought of running into Mummy Bobo's house to carry any bucket of water i come across but i just don't have the courage of doing that. Na by force to bathe everyday?? No be by force jawe. Afterall i bath yesterday.
I cleaned my oily face with towel, wear everything wear-able, pack my bag and vóila, i'm good to go. It was already 10:05am but i seem not to worry(lateness is in our blood. We know ourselves). I wen't as far as my compound when i remembered my computer manual is still in my room.
What is a computer manual? A computer manual is a small printed book sold by our computer lecturer for just 500naira which serves as the international passort for attending computer classes. It contains stuffs like; how to switch on a computer, how to reboot a computer, how to work on microsoft word and the likes. Back to the matter, i turned my room upside down looking for the computer manual. I found nothing but nylons of buscuits and sweets, dead cockroaches, big spiders and betting slips. Its a normal thing for guys anyway. With a mixed feeling of anger and sadness, my boo called me. We had a lame convo until she said all lecturers are having a meeting with the VC. What a relief, i layed on my bed for some time, arranged my room, take a 30mins satisfactory bath and wen't out celebrate my birthday with friends.

Guess what, Today is my birthday!! Wish me well, you may drop some likes here. Happy birthday TemiTope
cc: lalasticlala
cc: all nairalanders

Are you trying to be funny?

smileyyy:
Can u drop ur mail??

topefunofficial@gmail.com

Check the spelling.... You missed a letter on your domain, or when it displays could not locate remote server, try checking the url its refering to... Or better still drop ur site url lemme check it owt, i swear i won't ditch u *winks*

Sometimes you can't trust all these android phones, you type fun they display f*ck

vickylois:
Drop your mobile.. I'd text you.

08104422662, just text

vickylois:
Yes.. Interested in blogging

i feel like helping you, am Temitope living in Akure, Ondo state, a web programmer/designer and i feel like helping you with anything you want about blogging. Can you drop any suitable contact details. Email or phone

Age is just a number but 27-17 is way not cool at all. Taking a close look at it... If you were the father or mother of that girl, would you even allow your 17 year old girl to date a 27 year old man? Its too much abeg

Must u copy nairaland? Be creative bro

TOmmyJidex:
Php and Js is like Bread and Butter... You need both of them.

abi i no understand js again ni, my wesite is 95% php and 5% js. I used js for the current year and datz all

People are kinda nice here... Had it been the webmasters where the conk geeks are in, they would have ditched u badly.... Ur sitez blury, but color is ok. Work on ur css especially the display: block; component for easy touch (android users)

All i see here are characteristics of a weak man. I swear if anyguy does all these, he is going too boring and wants to be dumped for no reason