₦airaland Forum

190:
[color=deeppink]Atreides
you really didnt have to defend yourself so much
saying it waznt you,
you really made it look you're trying 2 hide something you know,

there aint noting wrong in getting pregnant, people do it here all the tyme[/color]

When people make posts about their 'friends',a lot of other people usually think they're talking about themselves. I wanted to make it very clear that this wasn't about me because if people think it's about me then they wouldn't give me the kinda advice i wanted.

iice:
[color=#9900ff]Had the same experience with a friend. While i'm usually the 'bad girl' and her the 'good girl'. . .she went and got herself preggars. I was shocked at first but i quickly recovered. She didn't need my help, she just wanted me to know. We have a supportive group of friends, so we still love her and are there for her. [/color]

I know being a friend means being there and being supportive,and that's all well and good in theory,but in reality,it's verrydifferent/a lot harder. Besides no matter how good a friend i am,i don't think i can be supportive of abortion.

@MrBrownJay,i didn't say any guy who did that(looked) would be more likely to cheat. I said any guy who ALWAYS/HABITUALLY did that would be more likely to cheat,IMO. And someone staring and drooling at a girl when he's with me would be beyond disrespectful.

@Lord_Reed,he's 19-ish. And yeah,i was really pissed off. I still am. Infact,when she told me i'm sure my jaw must've hit the floor. I kinda zoned out after that-we didn't really talk for a bit-i was still absorbing the whole thing. P.s-I've finished the first Dune book. Can i just say,i want to be a BG They rock!!!

pinky lady:
^^^^
and what is he saying?

Well she said he was scared,and then he told her that he would stand by whatever decision she made. That sounds very nice and noble and everything,but he hasn't really committed to any course of action. She's looking for someone to tell her what to do,and i don't think i can be that person. She didn't ask for my advice before she started sleeping with someone(you should've seen the way she was saying she did it only once,as if once is not enough). She didn't ask for my advice before she went and got herself pregnant so i don't see why she should be asking my advice now. This shouldn't be my problem. She wants me to promise not to tell anyone.

[quote author=Lord_Reed link=topic=583423.msg7507706#msg7507706 date=1294746395]Even if she does she'll still have to get practical. Anyways just help her all u can. Don't sweat it.[/quote]I shouldn't have to deal with this. I should be helping her with notes she didn't copy or a math problem she doesn't understand,or buying clothes for school,NOT dealing with a baby. I'm soooo angry with her! Even if she had to sleep with him,how could she not have protected herself in this day and age? How could she be so s.tupid? Aaargh! She hasn't told anybody,not her mom or her sister,just the boy.

Phate07:
[color=#E42217]

She should keep the child and let the father be responsible for the child's upkeep.
[/color]

She doesn't even like kids. How could she possibly take care of one? Or are you saying she should have the baby and then give it to the boy? But what's gonna happen to school?

@Lord Reed,her mom? Ke? Her mom's the type that will pack her things and tell her to go to the man who impregnated her. And my dad's staying away from my phone for now. . Hehe. . Imagine what he'd do if he found out i have a friend who's sooo bad she got preggers. . He knows her parents oh! He'd prolly report her.

likeme:
at age 17? Chei, that boyfriend is wicked o

He was her first and she said they only did it once. It wasn't planned.

Ok so first of all,this isn't about me. I don't even date,much less sleep with people. The only way i'd get pregnant would be through an immaculate conception or something. So this isn't about me;it's really about my friend. She's not my best friend but we're pretty close,and a few days ago she told me something pretty major-that she was pregnant,and i don't really know how to handle it. We both finished sec school this year,oops,last year(i'm still getting used to 2011),we both made Jamb and Waec,we both got into the same Uni. It was supposed to be me and her all the way to final year. That was the plan,and now she just gets herself pregnant? She was asking me for advice. What the heck was i supposed to say? I couldn't tell her to get rid of it-Abortion goes against everything i believe in,who i am as a person. And am i supposed to tell her to keep it? We're just 17!(ok well i still have a few months to go,but you get the point). I knew she had a boyfriend and i was okay with that;i don't judge-just because i don't date doesn't mean someone else shouldn't. But this pregnancy thing is a whole different ball game. She said he was her first,and that it wasn't planned-she went to his place,they were making out,she got carried away and it just happened. I was so dissapointed and confused,and at this point,i don't even know what to do. I can't just ignore her,but i can't hold her hand when she gets an abortion either. Things are just really awkward between us-like her pregnancy is this big rock that's obstructing the flow of the river of our friendship. What should i do? P.s-Sorry for the long post.

I'd give him time to heal. Rebound relationships hardly ever work out. Jumping into a r/ship with him when i know he's not yet over whoever his ex was would be asking for trouble.

[quote author=sista-jay link=topic=583046.msg7504113#msg7504113 date=1294691917]To look is not a crime!![/quote]Once in a while,yes,but what if it becomes a habit? A guy who nor fit see fine girl comot eye,even when he's with you has a problem. And someone who has a habit of doing that would be more likely to stray,IMO.

iyatrustee:
This would be my ideal man

Haha. . HawWWTTT!!!

But who ressurected this dead thread? And more importantly,why am i replying? @Topic,you should be legal by now,but i know there are a lot of girls who are where you were four years ago. I just can't get why you'd have been stripping for a guy at 14. I mean,seriously,WTF? And what kind of r/ship could you possibly have? At 14 as opposed to his 18,that's not a relationship-it's baby-sitting. Is it soo difficult to leave guys/men alone until you're more mature? Only God will deliver us sha. .

stevetboy9:
You guys are irritated by the topic because you're not virgins! If you were, you'll understand. Thank God 'm one at the moment!

Lol. . The guilty are afraid-or in this case the guilty are uber-defensive. I do think the OP shouldn't have made it only about women though. It goes both ways.

Hehe. . Wonder why t has mysteriously vanished. .

good2know:
@mygoldie, your comment realli touched my conscience.
@forum members, your comments ar waking up d reality in me

Are you sure you even have a conscience? It's your type that turn some women into man-haters. .  

CyberG:
I definitely KNOW a guy like you described BUT what would the lady bring to the table to really "hook" this kind of guy?

Well she'd be his perfect woman.

ola olabiy:
The dream in question mustn't exceed 'age 23' (16-23). Else . . . . , 
Just my 2 cents.

But you're clever because you said 'he doesn't exist'.

Take care.

Maybe i shouldn't have said he doesn't exist. He does exist-he's just relatively scarce. I'm not asking for that much-it's not like i'm looking for Mr. World;infact i specifically want a guy who's NOT extremely handsome. I'm not looking for a son of Dangote,i only want someone who'd be able to take care of his responsibilities. I know there are patient,kind and loyal guys out there-you just have to look for them. That's why i said i need Mr. Nice Guy-not the 'bad boy' type,or the 'fun,fun,fun' type. And if some reason i can't get the one who meets all my specs,then i would settle for the next best thing.

Casablanca was also kinda annoying. At the end there was a WTF moment. Humphrey Bogart was such a cutie-he deserved to get the girl and then he just gives her up to the stupid husband? Seriously? Verra annoying. . Lmao. . I kid,i kid. Casablanca's a classic-gave me one of my fav movie quotes;'Here's looking at you,kid'(although the fact that he called her kid was slightly disturbing). .

Knowing with Nicholas Cage. It was verry action-packed,verry cool(well the aliens were a bit creepy) and then at the end of the day everybody goes 'boom'? WTF? I mean,seriously,what was the message of the film? Verra useless ending to a good movie.

Abeg jhor,how come everybody's always talking about us? Even if 80% failed,20% still passed. So yes,there are students who fail everything they possibly can,but please don't forget the rest of us who actually work hard to make good grades. The education system in Nigeria is at best,mediocre,and that affects our performances,but i think that excuse has been used one to many times. What's the difference between two students in the same school under the same educational system who fail and who pass an exam respectively? Proper preparation,that's what. As crappy as the system is,those who want to pass and who are ready to work for it will pass,shikena. 80% of the blame rests on those of us who simply dont know what their priorities in life are/should be.

@Topic,my perfect man would be cute. Not drop-dead gorgeous because i don't have the strength/inclination to be dragging him with other women,neither would i want to deal with any arrogance and whatnot. My perfect man would be reasonably attractive. He'd be funny-nothing better than a guy who can make me laugh,IMO. He'd be patient(because i can be verra stubborn). He'd be kind and gentle and an all-round Mr. Nice Guy. He'd be financially buoyant. He would be considerate and smart,witty and loyal. He would be God-fearing and he'd respect me. My perfect man would smile when i smile,hold my hand when i cry,be my strength and my rock,and most of all he'd love me so much it'd hurt(almost). Sadly,he doesn't exist. Oh well. A girl can always dream.

queensmith:
yes in the same case the bible also tells husbands to submit to their wives!

It does? I went to read the Eph 5.20 that was quoted. You can't just pick a few words and interprete them out of context. Ephesians was written to the congregation in Ephesus and the first 20 verses of chapter 5 were to the congregation in general-not to married people. The bible NEVER said 'husbands,submit to your wives',but it did say 'wives,submit to your husbands'. I think the 'submitting to one another' bit referred to the congregation in general. After that,whoever wrote Ephesians talked about what a wife should do and what a husband should do. My two cents.

@queensmith,but in this case the bible does tell wives to be submissive to their husbands. .

[quote author=Mrs, Eve link=topic=581707.msg7487453#msg7487453 date=1294486489]What with these men and obsession with submissiveness? I mean these men so dumb downed that they want a dumb downed woman.

Too many of these men are not traditional asking for and seeking traditional women. WHAT THE HELL? [/quote]Being submissive doesn't mean you're dumb or that you lose your identity and become a 'yes,my husband','no,my husband' kinda wife. I think what some people define submissiveness to be is very different from what the bible writers had in mind. That being said,it's a wife's duty to be submissive to her husband-but that doesn't mean she's to become his slave.