advanceDNA:


U clearly have a challenge seeing things from.people's perpective ....he doesnt have to share both sides of marriage....pple do it all the time on nairaland....another moniker opens a new thread to counter arguments ..no big deal...he doesnt have to do it ur way

You have comprehension issues.

You didn't read this?

Since he didn't, he's just posting his opinion which is: there's no disadvantage of having a wife (read the title). But his father would disagree, no? And millions of other happily married men. Therefore, his opinion is biased and toxic and illogical.

livenija:
free card kill u there

Kingofhoes:
The grace of God . But on a serious note tho, I've just been lazy. Might I have acquired a fan of my writing?

Writers are hardly honest but you were. It's nice.

Now, I'm interested... Still too nervous to send a DM tho. Can't ruin this too early...

Zonefree:
Would be easier to see chilled bottle water in hell than to see a virgin Nigerian girl.


God bless the virgin South African girl. Virginity remains the greatest gift a woman can give her husband.

Are men so gullible? She couldn't have had anal and oraI sex? May God truly bless her.

I'll go print my own certificate soon.

Kingofhoes:
You've gone through my journal already lmao. Yeah i am and dark too

I was patiently waiting for you to come online.

And yes, I did. What would make you update it?

Presently, you're not his responsibility.

If he's ready to settle down, then go for it... He's a good man, right?

Since you aren't working yet, he'll be the sole provider. Is he financially stable?

Kingofhoes:
I recently started talking to a girl in school that i met through her "best male friend" and if not for anything i would swear you're her. Just the little time i've spent with her and she thinks exactly like you, she even told me this bomb ass story about how a secondary school friend attempted to ruin her life through a boy, i'm still laughing weeks after. I'd like to know you more even though your post says a lot about you, who knows i might be your kinda guy. PM?

Are you 5'11?
That's really tall.

Realistic expectations?

You just defined your miss perfect. She shouldn't do the same?

Unless you're successful, insanely rich, intelligent, with looks to make Aphrodite drop dead with lust... Forget it.

advanceDNA:


I'll try and ignore your insult....and no i dont think his post is mischievous...cos what has being honesty or dishosnest got to with a simple line of thought he chose to write about....... must he write in support and against marriage at the same time??

To the honest...there are more samples of bad marriages these days....that may be the reason for his views from a male perspective......its possible he might speak differently when the topic of advantage of being married comes up....but thats not todays topic... u clearly are biased here and cant seem to dissociate ur personal opinion about marriage from the op's view or motive of writting,


If u like...u can speak about men being horrible...thats fine u are not wrong....still doesnt chnage the fact that men are also great

You're contradicting yourself.

You said the op is doing the good work of letting people know the reality of marriage, so they can choose if it's what the want or not.

If that was his motive, he would have been completely honest. Talked about the good and bad.

Since he didn't, he's just posting his opinion which is: there's no disadvantage of having a wife (read the title). But his father would disagree, no? And millions of other happily married men. Therefore, his opinion is biased and toxic and illogical. Growing up, did he not see the advantage of his mother in his father's life?

His father is the number one man in his life, what other man has revealed his secrets to the op or confided in him?

I don't want to get married cause it's not my thing. Not because I'm a hypocrite, condemning something others want and happily have. That would make me a lousy person. If the op finds marriage distasteful, he should remain single. There's no need to come here, with facts from social media, to write that marriage has no benefits when many would disagree.

advanceDNA:


U are calling his views irrelevant...why?? U sound like u are taking it personal.....
Marriage is a serious matter and a lot of pple enter it conventionaly....so the op's views might help some pple audit their lives and see if marriage is truly what they want or something they are doing because their parents and society expects from.... for someone that doesnt want to get married, its weird that u dont reapect another person's view about marriage, calling it irrelevant.....

If u like keep ur opinion to yourself.....thats ur choice....its is choice to think out loud on nairaland...

Lmao.

I clearly stated that his NEED TO BROADCAST HIS CHOICE is irrelevant.

Comprehension issues?

If the op is being honest, he would also wrote down the positive side of marriage, then allow people decide. If he needs inspiration, he'll ask parents.

But he didn't. That's mischievous. You don't think so?

Kinda like if I only talk about how men have only sex to offer, forgetting the good they've contributed, that I benefit from (I'm referring to white men btw)...

JOACHINpedro:
If this thing near FP, 40% of NL single guys will opt to stay single.

As they should...

If you take this advise of a man whose parents are happily married, you deserve to live and die single... Let's better men pass their genes. They would be doing the world a favour.

Let's forget most of them can't afford to raise a family, can't even feed themselves. Marriage is the least of their problems.

advanceDNA:


Lol....I am playing victim?? This is not about me...we are talking about the op......so how am i playing victim......please explain...

You made it a gender thing by calling women out. If I attack the op then I'm against men. No?

Oh..so u know this is a public forum...so he has the right to pen down his views...just as u have the right to comment...so why say nobody asked him for his opinion??

It's a forum doesn't mean he should post irrelevant things. When he does, he gets called out.

Again u are boxing the dude and commiting fallacy.... Learning from home is learning from just two persons out of a large societal sample size...

There are marriages like his parents'. Does he live with these other couples? How does he know how miserable they are? The couples celebrating decades of being happily together, are they and his parents spirits and not humans? He got his fact from where? Social media? Lol. You only know so much about the people around you. His parents, relatives, friends and so on...they are the people whose marriages he can truly study.

there are other overwhelming evidences in the society that could make him say marriage is a bunch of nonsense... its his view....

one he is entitled to. I don't wanna get married too. But you don't see me broadcasting it unless asked. Again, what evidence? Exaggerated stories on social media? Lol

.... u asked how u invalidated his view..mayb u should read ur comment again and perhaps u will see ur own small dose of toxicity..

I didn't. I asked questions. A topic is meant to be discussed. Why are you allowed to agree and I'm not allowed to disagree?

If the op knows some marriages are successful, he would advise people here to work on theirs.... Not come here condemning the same thing his parents are proud of.

Kobojunkie:
So, at 14, you loved the image of God, Jesus, and Mary presented you during your masses? OK. And what I am telling you is that even that image presented to you, which you loved, at the point in time, was all a lie fed to you by conmen who are the priests whom you respect.

Wrong. I was raised Catholic. Even if I had never been to a church, I would still have been taught to love them...

You deliberately refuse to understand... But you would do anything for the sake of arguing.

*Sighs*

advanceDNA:


All this epistle because u dont agree with the guy and want to guilt trip/ invalidate/flaw his opinion ... u even said no one asked him but here u are giving ur own lenghty views that no one asked for..

saying one would think he's from a broken home because he's against marriage is sterotyping.........his views can be formed from societal happenings...

No one asked for my opinion? For your information, this is a forum. If you bring something here, expect a response.

How did a guilt trip him? You just love to play the role of the victim and it's pathetic. Was he insulted? No.

I didn't say he's from a broken home, I tsaid he gives the impression that he is from one.

You learn from your home first. No matter how bad other marriages are, if your parents have a perfect marriage, you would still be hopeful there are others like them. Aren't his parents human? How come their marriage is so great but others are bound to fail? He focused entirely on the negative aspects of marriage, ignoring all the good it did his parents. It's illogical and toxic.

Kobojunkie:
The last time you attended mass was when you were 3 years of age? You were 3 years of age when you claim you loved God, Jesus, and Mary?

14. Too old for you?

Dtruthspeaker:


You wish young lady.

It is even rather that you are already frustrated with life already and you are not yet 20, I can see how grey haired gaunt and thin you would be by 40 when you still are not yet married.

And as you see men ain't marrying no more.so more frustration

Using my own words against me? I must have really hurt you. How big is your Bible?

pansophist:


Yes, it is, because you are at the age where it will be your biggest temptation. Also, I would have said the same if you were a boy. I initially thought the post was from a man (which can be noticed in my first comment), until you clarified you are a girl. Regardless, a wise person will pick lessons.

Maybe I'm asexual? If so, you focused entirely on something I don't even understand. Honestly tho, sex is the least thing I care about. I emphasized the need for companionship. Friendship or a relationship, but I don't know if I even want that. Still discovering myself, I guess. I have commitment issues, need to solve that first.

Have a blessed day sir.

Kobojunkie:
1. They were conmen!

2. You loved God and Jesus and Mary so much that rather than accept the truth narrative presented of them in Scripture, you chose to adopt the flawed narratives presented by your priests?

Presented by my parent and family. I was raised Catholic, remember. At the age of three, I should have known better? You're being ridiculous now. I grew up, asked questions and gave up the faith. What's so hard to understand?

jaephoenix:

Once more, the legendary DTruthSpeaker pulls out more data from his ever resourceful ass.
I don't know any atheists offline, but from my interactions here, out of 3 I met here, they sound ex-pentecostals. I am ex-pentecostals. I tell people, if by chance I'm to choose any religion, it won't be christianity. And if I'm to choose a Christian denomination, it would be Catholics(remember I'm a former Pentecostal). So why Catholicism?
1. They tend to be more accommodating in their love. They don't discriminate
2. They don't often tell you in your face youre going to hell for not praying to Mary(I may be wrong here). Pentecostals would tell you that you'll roast in hell for even dare open your eye during prayers

I was a Catholic. I'll be honest, I'm grateful I was.

Are they more accommodating? Kinda. Some priests have the 'Nigerian' mentality, the parishioners too. Others are extremely nice.

Catholics hardly condemn others. They believe in purgatory, meaning they even believe some bad people have hope of attaining heaven after atoning for their sins there. That's one of the reason I could never worship I'm a Pentecostal church. I can't stand the hate, self-righteousness and hypocrisy.

I also enjoyed the ritual of mass... Outsiders might not get it, but it's something I'll always love.

***

I commented cause you accidentally mentioned me.

DTruthSpeaker is a frustrated old man. He reminds me of the hungry looking men who pray for traveling passengers, spitting on them, quoting verses their small brains can't comprehend...

pansophist:


Nothing is wrong with you. Give yourself time to grow, and just focus on being a good girl. And I will advise you, just like I did to my younger sister. If you meet a good man with promising potential, stay with him. Better if he is in his late 20ś or early 30ś. men like that wont waste your time as they may want to settle down too.

You are at your prime, and at the age where every man wants a piece of you, and this is the ultimate test to secure the best man ever. So don't sleep around and act slutty. You may think you hold the power to sex, but men hold the power to commitment.

And the kind of men you will want when you are ready to marry will most likely be the kind that will expect sexual purity from you. So do not fork your way through life and think settling down will be easy.

Lots of women reached a place where they met the man of their dreams, but he rejected her because of her dirty past and high body count. And no, you can't hide it. A man knows an innocent woman just from her behavior.

Your advice was entirely on sex... But it's fine, atleast you were respectful.

Kobojunkie:
But you did attend mass in a church at some point, right? I am simply making it clear that there has never been any point in history that those men who you bowed to even at that time were nothing more than conmen.

Priests? No. I've only admired three, because they were decent and honest. I'm an excellent judge of character, if they weren't priests, I would still have respected them.

I'm not a hypocrite. I'm not blinded by religion, never was. I loved God and Jesus and Mary... Priests are men. Some spend extravagantly on themselves, others fornicate, the worse rape children...

You don't deserve an explanation tho.

Kobojunkie:
Any religious church. All of them.

And you really quoted someone who hasn't attended mass in years?

I don't know if it's the emoji ( ), but I feel you're accusing me.

helinues:


My curiosity is why should one waits for others to take him or her out?

What the is the essence of working when you can't enjoy your money alone even if it's once in a while

Company?

Unavailability of time? Stress? The money isn't even good enough to enjoy, with all the bills... Plus, you gotta save.

advanceDNA:
Women will soon come and wail and insult the op....they will call him broke and immature just because he doesnt want wahala in his life...

Some will even say this thread is about bashing them

Many women are miserable married. If the op doesn't want to get married, he shouldn't. Who's forcing him to do so? Who asked for his opinion? No one. If a woman created a thread asking the relevance of a man in her life, you wouldn't hesitate to bash her. So let's pretend the men here are the mature ones, despite your prediction, how many women commented?

Francistown:
Saying you don't wanna get married doesn't make you special. This is getting boring, you owe no one an explanation. You haven't made an impact, only achieved a few minutes fame. All over the world, people are getting married less. Birth rate is also declining in the West.

I also find it surprising you mentioned your parents are happily married. You outlined only the negative aspects of marriage despite being raise by a couple who you claim truly love themselves. One would think you were raised in a broken home. Did your parents not inspire you? Did you not learn a thing for them? Isn't your mother a paragon of virtue, so much so that you pray for a woman like her... Are you sure you're not echoing the thoughts of your father? If you don't want to get married because it's not your thing, that's fine. But you're being awfully toxic.

pansophist:
If you're a man, nothing is wrong with you. You said you're 20 right? then it's the reality of your age. You're experience true loneliness, and even you won't know why you feel like that.

So you'll feel angry, isolated, broke and horney as fork, and what you do next defines the kind of man you'll be. So either you just focus on your future, by sacrificing the present for a better tomorrow.

Or you start carrying olosho, doing drugs and Yahoo, and trying to enjoy the present while sacrificing the future. You get into all kinds of bad habits, additions and end just being your the architect of your failure.

I'm a girl. Is something wrong with me? I've never been with someone, except for online relationships

Someone should take me out!!!!

***

Honestly, I've never. But this year, I intend to. I'm going to make money and spend it, on myself.

Kobojunkie:
The last such man of God was John the Baptist; after Him, there are no others.

What your churches today are filled with are false teachers and false prophets masquerading as "men of God" while they sit as gods over the lives and minds of blind men.

Dearest Kobojunkie, I don't believe in God. What church do you speak of? Must you attack me?

Nia69:
Thanks love. 🤗
I wish you the same.

🥰

It's obnoxious.

What's worse is how they treat these men, like they are demi gods doing them a favour.

Oh. Thank you very much. Happy women's day to you and all the amazing women on Nairaland!

Nia too. 🤍

Kalatium
Kobojunkie

I'm not condemning hope. I'm saying it's wrong to hope for someone else or something to save you. That's religion. It teaches you that you need a saviour. That your capabilities alone aren't sufficient when they are.

The rats died expecting to be lifted out of the water a second time. They made no effort to save themselves, to figure a way out if there was one. (Assuming they could)

That's what most religious people do. They pray then wait, expecting a miracle. That's not life.

Hope on it's own isn't bad, humans have survived on it. I have too. But I'm putting my trust in me, entirely. I'm not a rat, you aren't too.

Failure2019:
I'm in my fourth year of my computer engineering degree


Currently a system architect working for a electric vehicle startup

We just did our series B :-)

Congratulations.