₦airaland Forum

djon78:
Mr man it simply implies that your niece can come to your house and insult your wife. But for me, they no born that person well to try it.

Whether you people realise it, an insult on Aisha is an insult on her husband. Simple
And honestly, this present scenario is truly showing what that woman is going through there. Insulting and disrespecting her by recording a whole first Lady and not fearing to even give interview on it.
It is seriously gross.
And I think Aisha is trying to let Nigerians know what she is going through.
Nigerians like Aisha, she has genuinely spoken out in issues and she is an exceptionally good looking woman for her age. Just like Britons were madly in love with princess Diana despite her fued with the British Royal family.

Not all the time.

Marriage is not as straightforward as many of you have been made to believe.

Moreover, there are some background story that we are not aware of.

Stories filtering in say Aisha disrespects her husband's family. If this were the case, then it is a big problem that you don't solve by quickly taking sides because your wife is involved.

Let me give you a scenario.

A man marries a woman. The woman does not like her husband's family because she feels they are not guiding her husband right. A good husband establishes spots in the family, not take sides. Aisha is his wife and she has her place in his heart. Maman is a family and he has his place in Buhari's heart as well. When conflicts happen between Aisha and Maman, Buhari cannot afford to take sides. Rather, he would establish a common ground for agreement or tolerance. A good husband does not break relations simply because he wants to protect his wife. Rather he mends relations.

There are instances where it is very necessary to protect your wife's interests. But what evidence do you have that Buhari has not done that? Or does not do that? Moreover, this is a family issue. Aisha is family, Maman is family too. Buhari cannot treat Maman like an outsider in matters like this.

As for Fatimah being rude to Aisha, I am not saying that it is a good thing. But things like this happen. If there are stories about wives manhandling their husbands' mothers, why are you people making a big deal out of this conflict? Why are you people always quick to hate on Buhari?

He can't control his family bla bla bla. As if it is only Buhari's family that has even ever been confronted with conflicts.

CanadaOrBust:
So u want argument and refutation. Ok, I’d refute your points one by one without ad hominem personal attacks. Please try to accord me same respect.

1) UNNECESSARY and CHILDISH are subjective terms in this context. The challenge can appear such to YOU but appear quite necessary and wise to me (that’s the meaning of subjective)

2) In a forum like this the ONLY way we have to determine the popularity of an opinion is by the number of likes it receives. We have no other way. Plus it does truly work in determining POPULARITY of a comment on NL (points u mentioned not withstanding)

3) Since no single person has a monopoly on wisdom we can only decide subjectives through consensus of opinion - whichever view gets more votes (likes) carries the day. If there are 299 likes that the challenge is courageous but only 19 votes that it is childish, NL has informally adopted the view that the challenge is courageous and not childish which happens to be my view.

What that means is that u have lost that battle and should direct your energies to something else. As they say, better luck next time

You have not answered my question.

Why is the challenge necessary? If no one comes forward, would that be an evidence of his innocence?

Well, I don't believe she has breast enlargement, silicone or not.

I have always known her to have big breasts. And breast enlargement is not so old, especially in Africa.

AquariusRising:
I'm sure sitting quietly will be your response, when your niece comes to your house to taunt and mock your wife in her own home. We should not excuse rubbish we will not take in our own home!

And so I asked "what should Buhari have done?"

Many of you can't answer that question because it is easier to judge than to solve problems.

"I can do it, I can do it" that is what everyone screams during campaigns until they get into office and see the reality.

Jimi24:
Cowardly young liar. Buhari ejected the family of a man he used to know as a brother decades before his wife was born to satisfy his wife and immediate family based in her request.

We know most young Nigerians are incapable of critical thinking and depth but try to READ and UNDERSTAND what is put in front of you. I.know its difficult for you ..but try.

Aisha has misunderstanding with extended family ...that is 90% of all families in the world.

However since Buhari ejected Daura's family to accommodate his recovering son, we can surmise he is not being controlled by anyone.

There is a kitchen cabinet in Aso Rock... you calk them cabal ..there ia a kitchen cabinet in the White House, Kremlin, everywhere.

Aisha should stop making a spectacle of herself. In the UK, the royal family has internal tension.. Meghan is at odds with her in laws. No biggie ....welcome to life.
Aisha can oppose APC policies publicky and even ctiticize her husban and Buhari has not ever stopped that BUT she should apply wisdom in managing her family affairs. In Yorubaland, the Daura guy would actually be like Father In Law even though he us younger than Buhari

God bless you.

The problem with all these critics is that they have a major problem with Buhari. They don't criticize because they want to help, or because they are concerned about Aisha. They just do it because they hate Buhari.

nams77:
Are you serious? I thought they are humble and reserved

Many of them are not humble and reserved. It is a stereotype.

I dare to say that Yoruba women are more humble and reserved than Hausa women.

Even Thailand takes wildlife preservation seriously.

Thank you, Seun, for considering my open letter.

This are the type of snake news we want on FP. Not news about the killing of snakes.

AwkaetitiBabe:
For real? Us president feeds his family from his pockets? Wow, this is a cultural shock for me.

Yes, it is a fact.

The White House budget only covers staffing, travel, and security. The budget also covers utilities (like electricity bills) and then, medical bills

But for personal expenses such as feeding, and even private parties, the president funds them from his own pocket.

CanadaOrBust:
U should really seriously consider a career in Law. You have a naturally legalistic mind (though in a childish sort of way).
“Unnecessary” and “childish” are subjective terms (in this context). It depends on your particular bias. Important thing is that it is normal human reaction. And most people agree with the lecturer - see number of likes below. The person even has more likes than me who is the FTC

This is the most shallow post I have ever read.

So, because many people liked and shared the post, it means something positive?

Have you factored in the possibility that intellectually deficient people liked the post, or that it was three or four persons with multiple accounts who liked the post? Or that the lecturer had sympathizers here who did so purely out of sentiment, and not necessarily because they agree?

There is an Nwaimapke (or whatever) guy on this forum, who gets a lot of likes even for very insensitive post. Does popular demand equate with sense?

Then you pointed out that unnecessary and childish were relative even though I explained why the challenge was unnecessary. I hate people who don't read. I wonder why you are arguing if you never read my post in totality. Or, perhaps, you are not very smart. If you think unnecessary and childish are subjective as far as this matter is concerned, then tell me why the challenge is necessary? That is how you argue. But no, many of you come here and write a load of rubbish without bothering for substance.

Again, you wrote of legalistic mind, and then mention this mind as childish. It would be understandable if you wrote argumentative, though. Legalistic is learnt, my friend. Argumentative is basic and can be sublimated to a "legalistic mind". Go back to school.

Moreover, you were talking about unnecessary and childish being subjective. It is unfortunate that you would yourself use the word "childish" so loosely. I explained why the challenge unnecessary, but you, all you have done, is use words anyhow in a bid to sound smart.

Read this very post of mine very well, and the immediate one, and refute them. Enough of hiding behind "legalistic" and other words that do not strengthen the argument.

Racoon:
The question remains, what is Mamman Daura family doing in Aso Rock? Was he elected as the president or constitutionally appointed as his aide?

Even in the United States, there is no constitutional constraint on whom the president invites to share the White House with him as long as they leave in the unofficial quarters referred to as The Residence. The American president can bring in his uncles and aunties and cousins if he so wishes.

However, since the American president feeds himself and his family from his own pocket, it would mean that he would also be responsible for feeding these relatives.

abbasajao:
Pls what is the genesis of rag day?

Rag day began in the United Kingdom. It involves ragging people until they give you money. All the money collected is then given to charity.

Ragging means behaving in a disorderly manner. In the case of rag day, ragging is done to collect money which is then given to charity.

It does not mean that one has to wear rags.

Rag day does not mean you have to wear rags.

However, you are free to do silly things such as behaving like a deranged fellow.

Kevinsamba:
I don just get
Is it that this yellow fever doesn't have a cure?

Yellow fever is a viral infection, and viral infections don't have specific cures, so doctors manage them by treating symptoms such as fever, chills, cough, etc, and not the virus itself.

lordkush:
so maman daura daughter can disrespect Aisha in this manner.


what kind of person us buhari sef. very useless to himself, family, nation, Africa, world, and universe at large.

his kids may even be scared to mice around because the bogeyman maman daura and his families re locking the doors in aso rock

So, what should Buhari have done? He should have beaten Daura's daughter or locked her up?

Is there a family in this world where there are no conflicts? And does that belittle the competence of the head of that family? We are humans, and are bound to collide once in a while due to individual differences and conflicting interests. That is why we have conflict resolution.

Aisha's story did not happen suddenly. You must have read about Yusuf and the House that Maman Daura once occupied. This means that the tension had been building over time. Aisha has yet to imply that Maman's daughter is always rude to her, so it might just be a one-off incident which happened due to anger, immaturity, and women palaver.

CanadaOrBust:
Look at this guy with his legalistic technicalities. Once again, u sure u r ok?
I’d simply repost what I posted:

Do u know the meaning of the word TRENDING?? If it were to start TRENDING in National media that Nairalanders post tribalist comments, it would be most natural for u to say you’ve never posted a tribalist comment and challenge anyone to prove otherwise. That’s just normal human behavior and if u have issue with that, the jaundice is with YOU!
And the most likely reason would be that YOU ARE GUILTY of posting tribalist comments

I never wrote that he should not challenge anyone.

I wrote that it was unnecessary and childish

Might I ask you a question?

What would his challenge achieve? If no one comes out at the end of the day, is that a proof of his discipline?

How many accusers come out openly to accuse their molesters, especially if the molester held a position of authority over them?

It is safe to say that no one would come out at the end of the day because it hardly happens. So, what good would the challenge achieve? If not for BBC and Kiki, the likes of Boniface would be bold to make this same challenge because they know accusers hardly come out. The accusers who spoke to the BBC crew did not openly accuse the lecturers. Even in the documentary, their faces were blurred to protect their identity.

And should anyone come out, even with damning evidences, this lecturer could claim the evidences to be nothing but fabrications.

The challenge was unnecessary because victims hardly come out publicly to accuse their molesters.

caprini1:
I have confirmed This....meeen ,you get football history o....my kind of friends.Cheers bro.

Cheers, bro

KosiGee:
Good memory. Nigeria was playing well in that match and there was a certain Jero Shapoke, hope I got the spelling correct who was tormenting the Germans on the right flank, he cupped an injury. I think he dislocated his shoulder. I’ve never heard about him ever since.

Well done, bro. You got the spelling. Jero Shapoke.

He is still playing though, at 39.

CanadaOrBust:
Something that’s so simple, yet see how confused and convoluted you’ve gotten yourself.
SIMPLE: It is trending that lecturers ask for sex in exchange for grades, making it seem all lecturers do it except they have not yet been caught. Here is one lecturer saying he has never done such and challenging anyone to prove otherwise.
Unless u r a sex-for-grade lecturer, how can u possibly have a problem with that??!!

Stop making assumptions like an illiterate.

making it seem is not the same as it is

No one even said lecturers ask for sex for grades, but that sexual harassment is rampant in our higher institutions.

No one has accused all lecturers of sexual harassment. You can't make a case for innocence when no charge has been made against you.

Promiscuity has been passed around to be common among doctors, nurses, pilots, hairdressers, etc. Except you are responding to an allegation during an interview on TV, radio, or during an informal conversation, there is no need to make challenges when no one has accused you or thrown it at you.

That was why I brought in the case of his wife. Perhaps, someone has accused him and he has decided to prove his innocence.

CanadaOrBust:
U may not be a lecturer but I bet u r a sexual predator of some sort afraid of being exposed.

Otherwise how can u possibly have a problem with something so simple and clear.
SIMPLE: It is trending that lecturers ask for sex in exchange for grades, making it seem all lecturers do it except they have not yet been caught. Here is one lecturer saying he has never done such and challenging anyone to prove otherwise.
How can u possibly have a problem with that, unless u r a predator yourself afraid of being exposed by a challenge

I believe you are a man. Men are thought to be more emotionally relaxed than women, which means they are relatively more unlikely to make assumptions.

How does my post suggest that I am a sexual predator? I did not explicitly or implicitly support sexual harassment. The main issue here is not even sexual harassment, but whether it is necessary to make a claim at innocence when no charge has been filed against you or a complaint publicly peddled against you.

Imagine Boniface and others standing trial in a court, and this man jumping in and claiming his innocence. Does that sound normal to you? How does the matter concern him for now?

BigJoe19:
These here is a foolish statement, the guy came forward to say it the public about his inocence but you still had to write that he is guilty, is it a must for a man to sexually harass a woman?

His innocence? Was he accused in the first place?

CanadaOrBust:
See how CHILDISH u r. He should first wait to be accused then dare anybody to accuse him Huh?? Sex-for-grade lecturer spotted

He didn't ask them to accuse him. He said they should expose him. Accusation is not the same as exposition.

Imagine that you are a lecturer. You have not been exposed like Boniface and the other lecturers captured in the documentary, but your name is being mentioned on social media and everywhere as one of the lecturers who engage in sexual harassment. That is an accusation. You can stand up and challenge anyone to come forward and expose you.

Exposition comes with evidence(s).

CanadaOrBust:
See how CHILDISH u r. He should first wait to be accused then dare anybody to accuse him. Huh?? Sex-for-grade lecturer spotted

I am not even a lecturer.

Secondly, his post is unnecessary and childish. No one has accused him (we all know how accusations like this come, not openly). When the accusations come flying in, that is when you react and dare people to come out.

Rape accusation of this nature nearly always begin with witnesses whose identities are hidden. If accusations come in, then you can challenge anyone to come forward.

No one has mentioned your name overtly or covertly, but you are already making a challenge. Perhaps, his wife has accused him and so he is challenging anyone who has suffered sexual harassment from him to come forward.

It was unnecessary and childish.

Accusations of sexual harassment in the corporate world are rife. It would be childish for someone (a manager, CEO) to come up (except he has been overtly or covertly accused) to challenge woman or man to come forward and accuse him or mention his name publicly.

Houseofglam7:

Seems like you know the man.

Na fireman abi

dfrost:
Don't mind him.
Don't fix it, if it's not broken. Simple.

Very sensible.

Very unnecessary and childish.

He should wait for accusations first before daring anyone to come forward.

Or, perhaps, his wife has been accusing him at home and the poor man has had enough and decided to challenge anyone to come forward with whatever damning evidence (s) there might be.

Might even be the wife that posted the challenge. The man would be in serious trouble if he is into sexual harassment because by the time the victims start reporting to duty, no one would be able to save him from his wife's disrespect and/or mockery.

Why is that guy holding Aboy from the back

Looks disgusting to me.

Tufiakwa!!!

kensing1046:
That our second keeper is more better than him self,

He do that to himself anyway

Which second goalkeeper is better than Uzoho?

CapitalHYC:
Haaaa ... You no sabi keep, still get this kain injury join.. Double wahala for dead body .. OYO is your case

The guy has improved tremendously. He made vital saves, and he seems relatively more confident. He is clearly the Number 1 now.

I wish him quick recovery.

timelessaproko:
Just doing my job honey moreover is not jean and polo he wore!
My father still wear jean supposedly so read undertone
!!

How much do you know of Frank's ex wife that makes you unabashedly take her side in such a matter as this?

You have covertly blamed Frank for everything. You have blamed him for the marriage that did not work, and have at the same time covertly taken whatever blame there might be off his former wife.

Are you married? If you are not, I would advise that you marry so you can have some sympathy for people whose marriages failed.

As at yet, we don't really know what caused the breakup. We have heard rumors of domestic violence perpetrated by Frank, but is it not possible that even if this were true, his former wife also perpetrated domestic violence in another form, which would make her just as guilty?

Domestic violence or spousal abuse comes in four major forms:

.Physical (women are usually the victims)

. Emotional (either partner can be a victim)

. Verbal (men are usually the victims).

. Economic (either partner can be a victim).

Many agree that the emotional abuse is the worst form of abuse, because it is subtle. Your husband or wife talks to you anyhow. You might be tempted to think that no abuse has happened because they didn't raise their hands to you (physical abuse) but the long-term damage can be devastating. Losing your self-worth from constant emotional abuse can be one of the most difficult clinical issues to deal with.

What if Frank's former wife showed him "pepper" in the marriage? She might have been supportive, it doesn't mean she was a saint. I have seen men who take care of their wives but talk down at them at every slight opportunity. These men think all their wives need is financial or career support. So, they don't consider that their wives need to be respected. So, they talk to them anyhow. It is all fine to the woman as long as the man does not beat her. What she does not know is that she is in an unhealthy relationship.

I remembered when I bought my first ever car. One neighbor came around and was like "Na this car you buy? Why you no buy so-so car (which was a far more expensive car)"

I told him straight there and then that if he had dashed me the money, I would have gladly bought the car he was recommending.

Questions I hate:

Oga, when you go marry? (It gets more annoying when they add "Your mate don dey born three, four).

You still dey use this phone/car (If the thing pain you so much, why not change am for me?)

Oga, why you dey leave beards? (How it take be your business? Na your face the beard dey?)