₦airaland Forum

CsRockefeller:
I knew it. The guy is good though and very funny

Rozz:
lol good evening ma

solite3:
making right choices through God's wisdom is very important especially in marriage.
The problem is many men and women do not seek for biblical consent to marriage issues and life entirely, hence they fall into all manner of hurts and pains.

Rozz:
I believe one can still pursue a career even in marriage,pursuing a career shouldn't stop any lady from marrying early

Alexaonfleek:
Thanks @ bukatyne for this interesting thread.
Just took my time and went through it, including the comments.
I totally agree with your thoughts on this and the bestie part.
The only problem is to get the diff between a serious minded guy and the one who wants to take you for a ride and dump you.

Richy4:
I agree with you Sis but not things like that happening to a daughter of the land at this day and age.. It's just absurd..

Please kindly look at what that guy listed there again. Even the ladies in the bible of old cannot take that...

crackkhaus:
No be only woke.

Tansgender people are suffering from a brain disorder, and so is anyone who believes they're normal.

If people born without wings cannot convince themselves they can fly, then a woman born without male genitals has no business convincing herself she's a man.
Both are signs of schizophrenia.

yvelchstores:
my thoughts exactly

Richy4:
One of those Corona Virus stories...

you speak freely with your Girlfriend in your wife's presence, your wife did not talk..

After opening a shop for your lover , u still collected your wife's shop keys and gave it to your lover for her birthday, yet she didn't talk..

Hmmmm!!! is this the part two of War Room?

yvelchstores:
ma, let me indulge you as we list all the chores ; washing cloths, plates, sweeping, mopping the floors, scrubbing the toilet, bathing the kids, dressing them up, ironing the clothes/uniforms, going to the market, baby sitting, cutting the vegetables, blending the orishirishi---->househelp does these. Putting together the condiments in the pot, homework, school runs, morning devotional, bedroom duties-----> madam does these... That is if she even does all these. I don't see a balance. I get your point but I do not think it's fair that a maid slave away, she is human too.

yvelchstores:
You make a fellow human being like you work like a slave. I want to know why she can't do what the help was doing? Is she not with 2 hands and legs like the maid?

crackkhaus:


Think like the slave masters...

phorget:
Realizing ones mistake is always the right direction for correcting such mistake.
There is no better time than now so you can choose to right all your wrongs and bring your family together again.

Call your wife to a private meeting and seek for her forgiveness. If she forgives you then automatically the kids will forgive you also(mothers has a way with the kids, the direction mothers take the kids mostly follows).

Try as much as possible to win her back and never you loose focus in regaining your home.

Kingsleyyx:
I love my wife but I have been hurting her for years,infact I had make her look like a devil in the eyes of my parents and siblings. I will not hide any truth from you because right now ,I am trying to find a solution on how to win my wife heart back. I womanize alot. I have a particular side chick that my wife is even aware of down our street. I love this girl with the whole of my heart,anytime am with her I feels contented. I sponsored her through school with her younger brother,and I also set up a provision store for her mum. I so much love this girl and infact I stopped having numerous chicks because of her. She is everything a man can wish for. She pampered me like a baby,and she is an expert on how to sex a man and make him draw spits. I invested alot on this lady and never care for the mother of my children. The first and the last time I beat my wife was the day she call my girlfriend to insult her ,and I was with the girl that night she put it on speaker. I went home and beat my wife blue black. Though I regretted my action and apologized to her.
Since then I didn't hide my extra affair with my wife . My girl will call and I will speak freely in the presence of my wife,she won't say pim. I wanted this girl to be pregnant but she just wouldn't be.
After,I started frustrating my wife so that she can leave the house and the girl can move in,but no matter what i did to my wife ,she will never talk. I stopped having sex with her and and she never for once complaint. I started taking my girlfriend to family function in place of my wife ,still my wife was not affected. I siezed her shop key and gave to this girl as her graduation gift,my wife did not talk and she didn't leave my house. I planned all evils but she wasn't affected by it.
This my side chick is now pregnant with another man's. I have threatened her to abort the baby that I will forgive her and marry her,but she said am too old for her. When she and her family was collecting and spending my money ,she didn't know that I am too old then.
Now am tired of fighting for someone that can never be mine,I want to face what's mine. Can you imagine that I just realised that my first born will write WAEC this year. Am so ashamed of my self. My wife has become so old and very slim. I wanted to hug her ,but I don't know where to start from. It's been years we last had a physical body contact. We don't even sleep in the same room. The kids are looking at me like a stranger,I can't even crack jokes with them.
Please help me ,how do I start and what should I do to win my family love back? I promise to do whatever you tell me to

PuZZyNegro:
My only concern is the difference in grammatical construction. You seem to write well more than the oga.

Not trying to sound tribalistic but I noticed that people from that south south part of Nigeria "see" life too early.

This matter is a heavy one. Since a child is involved, you're forever connected to him.

I don't know how to explain to young girls for them to understand. The decisions you make as a teenager affects your entire life in the long run.

If you must f.uck at that age, look for a responsible person.

At 17, you were already having multiple exes.

MMotimo:
Someone needs to start a thread here to encourage women to start relating simple arithmetic to birthing children. Basic arithmetic skills are not just about passing school exams, they are a basic part of life skills
How can you even look your kids in the eye when they are suffering and you’re pregnant AGAIN?

Jessie21:
yh I was... I'm making amends now

MMotimo:
Yes, I am a woman so I tend to get particularly impatient with women that contribute to the “fish brain” reputation

ahnie:
Sassy and bukatyne ayam not understanding this lovi lovi again o.

AutoB24:
I never wanted to talk about this issue again, but the lies is really on the high side This guy the op is talking about is me from delta state and she is from aqua ibom state. From the beginning of our relationship this lady has been the one who lure me into action to her through her attitudes. Come to think of it if I'm a womanizer like she said. Will I even care now that she decides to leave a life without thinking? She now chew gum everywhere she goes,- now as a choir is she suppose do this ungodly things that she never did in my house?, she now do abnormal things like spending much time on social medias, getting wrong advises from friends,. Now she's fast at trowing her ring away. And this is the truth of the fighting side while we were still single at the earlier time we had a little agreement on the process of arguing this lady in question gave me tow hot slaps in the present of my friends then I was asked to quit but I never did because of the undying love I have for her even till now.
In the area she talked about cheating I was very sorry to her and still sorry now. But she caused it all I never knew how to control it at home wit a woman whenever I call her to bed she had no option that period than to reject me for good two weeks today she's weak, the next she's feeling sleepy pls naira landers I don't want to have this ugly record of quilting from marriage to marriage pls advise I still love her and the baby. Now the even when I ask her to think about the boy. There's this ugly reply I hate hearing from her. When advise we trade carefully and think about our boy the next thing I hear is and so? What about him? Pls she's getting out of hands. I have never suffered her I showed her real love she can testify.

Jessie21:
Last year December again when I went to his village another oath was done,this time with him mom and dad present...his blood, bitter kola and native gin...I drank the whole content..he didn't taste it...I did this willingly because I wanted a peaceful home, I wanted him to have rest of mind knowing I can never cheat on him....At the end everything because worse.. that was when he decided to kill me early this year January

TonyeBarcanista:
I still don't understand the need for your story as regards that of OP.

You were warned about having a BF but you refused to heed warnings of your parents.

You knew he was into fraud, cheat, violent etc but stayed put.

You are the architect of your own problem. Like OP, you threw yourself at an ungodly man and expected godliness from him. Kolewerk! .. You also disregarded wise counsel without knowing that you are doing yourself.

Jessie21:
Early 2016 February 15,
I started dating a guy that wanted us to be a thing.
At that time I just finished secondary school and I was supposed to sit for SSCE but I couldn't because my family was down financially.

When my parent noticed I was going out with the guy,they were seriously against it but I was so adamant at that time.

Months passed by and I was still with the guy.late 2016 September 19, the guy moved to a new apartment and that was how I started going there too till I ended up living with him.

During this period of being with him,I saw many red flag that should have made me quit from the relationship but I ignored them.
The red flags were
1. Cheating
2.Hitting and embarrassing me publicly (even tearing my clothes)
3.Intentional accusing me of things he knows I'm not guilty of.

A late 2017 when I got pregnant,we kept the pregnancy but it didn't put an end to red flag.... whenever we had little misunderstanding that can be resolved easily,he would act so angry and hit me wherever he likes with the pregnancy.

When I run to my parent,he will follow me there, embarrass me and parent too all this happened many many time.


Story cut short

I reminded him of my studies after I delivered our baby and all he said was I should wait till the baby is 2yrs old,I agreed without argument.

Forward to late 2019..... The time I was really determined to sit for my SSCE so I met my pastor in church and told him about it,my pastor encouraged me and promised to help me with 20k after I get the rest of the 20k because SSCE registration is 40k.

Note we got officially engaged late 2019 around October.


Getting home that Sunday,I told my fiance about how I met with my pastor and his assistance towards be registering for SSCE...
Afte

Note: whenever I bring up the topic,all he say is he has other expenses lemme just calm down.

The main point is he never really showed interest or gave any hope that we were going to raise the remaining 20k
All he kept saying was he has to many things to do.

After seeing that there was no hope for me with his statement,I decided to contact relatives and friends to assist me.. The day he caught me texting my ex asking for assistance to get money to register for exam I hid the phone and I know I was wrong.He reported me to my parent and his family members.... Every blame and rebuke me for that...I on the other hand admitted that i was wrong and apologized.


Note: he caught me typing the message but the message was never sent.

After my several apologies and family members intervention,the issue died down...So I kept reaching out to my relatives to assist me and luckily for me,one of them replied and sent the 20k to....I was so happy to know that problem has been settled.
So I called my pastor to let him know that I had gotten the 20k then he asked me to send my account details which I sent and received alert of 20k making 40k

SSCE Payment has been completed.

crackkhaus:
Hah
Is it not attention you were looking for by putting your big nyansh there? And you know that was not even the first one you used...


Anyway, let me answer your qweshons:

When it comes to marriage,
Women are more picky when they are between the ages of 18-28, because men are still rushing them and it makes them feel special to have so many options.
Men on the other hand are more picky when they are between the ages of 29-35, because they have started to have sense in life and figured out that women should never be taken at face value.

Alternatively,
Women are less picky when they are between the ages of 29-35, because the options have reduced and the men their age or older are more interested in getting married to women much younger than them.
Men on the other hand are also less picky when they are between the ages of 18-28 because they know very little about women, still make stupid decisions, and can date almost anything with a vagîna.

The summary is that, when it comes to being picky about marriage, it really depends on one's level in life...male or female.

sassysure:
Oya sorry sweetie
You know I rove u
Don't mind him

haywhy1026:
*EVERY MAN DESERVES A 4G WIFE*
(Interesting and worth sharing)

I have met 1G wives, 2G wives, 3G wives and 4G wives, but only the 4G wives are making lasting positive impacts.

Some sisters would say but I am not married yet... You are supposed to be a wife material before marriage. The Bible says, "he that findeth a wife..." Therefore, let's learn one or more from these to add values to our lives.

1G Wives:
The First G stands for Good. Every Man deserves a Good wife. I will explain what I meant by being Good. The Bible says "he that findeth a wife findeth a good thing..."

Prov. 31:12 says,
"She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."
A Good wife does 6 things to her husband. The dictionary defines being Good as having desirable or positive qualities. How do you recognize a good wife?

1. She is kind to her husband. She speaks kind words and do kind things.

I was with a wife one day and I called her a witch to her face. I said "You don't have to be flying to be a witch, you are behaving like one already" do you know what she did?

Her husband came back from work and the man was still outside with dirty clothes and body and she was screaming that he brought money for food home what about money for school fees?

I said "this man has gone out since morning, he has worked hard and is tired already, can't you be kind enough to give him water for bathing and give him food before collecting money and screaming at him?

Some wives treat strangers better than they treat their husband.

2. A Good woman is a true Help Meet.
She doesn't put the burden of the family on her husband alone.

Some women want their husband to pay house rent, give them household allowance, take care of their family and his family and still pay school fees.

The poor man will still buy them clothes and shoes and he is in trouble if he forgets to pay electricity bills or renew DSTV subscription. Kukuma kill the man.

Women should take time to study Proverbs 31 diligently. A virtuous woman is not lazy and dependent on her husband alone for survival.

3. A Good woman is loving to her husband and appreciates her in-laws. She loves them because they are the reason she has a great man who loves her.
Someone trained that man, sent him to school, teach him manners and how to treat a woman well. You are enjoying the fruit of other people's labour. Don't call them pests or parasites.

4. A Good wife is a peaceful woman. She treats her neighbours well and hospitable.

5. A good woman is a good cook and a good caretaker.
She understands that the way to her Man's heart is through his stomach. Men love good food.

6. A good woman grooms her home and tend her garden.

When she is Good she has 1G, we all know that 1G cannot get you anywhere, hence, the need to upgrade.

2G Wives:
The 2nd G is Gorgeous.
Psalm 45:10-11
10. Listen, O daughter,
Consider and incline your ear;
Forget your own people also, and your father’s house; 11. So the King will greatly desire your beauty; Because He is your Lord, worship Him.

Prov. 31:22
"She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple".

There was a period that I equated Holiness with wearing oversized clothes and wearing colour riot. Thank God for knowledge.

A Gorgeous wife:
1. Dresses beautifully to attract her husband
2. Wins him over and nurture his affection
3. Reverence her husband and places him on a pedestal. Yes, she is biased and partial to her husband because they have got each other's back.
4. She is charming and pretty
5. She fascinate her husband
6. She knows and maintain her place in his heart
7. She knows that the way she dresses is the way people will address her husband.
When a wife is Good & Gorgeous, she has 2G. We all know that 2G cannot do much for you as well, you need more than that.

3G Wives:
The 3rd G is GREAT.
The dictionary defines Great as achieving Distinction and Honor. A Great wife is a distinctive wife not a destructive wife.

A Great Wife does the following:

1. She honours her husband publicly and privately.
I know a woman that used to call her husband her lord. How will you feel as a husband if your wife calls you my lord? Will you beat such a woman or starve her?
2. A Great woman Praises her husband, she does not put him down.
I was with a couple one day and I told the wife jokingly while admiring her new phone that "Your husband is trying O! How many husbands will buy their wife a phone at this time when the economy is hard?" She said "Se iru phone eleyi lawon egbe e n ra fun iyawo won?" Meaning is this the type of phone his Mates buy for their wife?

3. A Great woman preserves her husband by giving him peace of mind.
A man has gone to work since morning and when he comes home at night what you use to welcome him is "Thank God you are home, I would have killed somebody but trust me Sha, I showed her pepper"
There are too many Madam pepper working around parading themselves as wives, God will save men.
Many men are so fed up that they are praying for death.

4. A Great Wife romances her husband and seduce him.
We were told that as a Christian woman, you must be ready to be your husband's prostitute. If you can serve him dinner in the bedroom and in the sitting room you can do anything with him.
5. A Great woman guide her husband into greatness.
She dusts him up and encourages him.
We know that 3G is great but nothing can beat 4G because it is much more better.

4G Wives:
The 4th G is Godly.
Every man deserves a Godly wife.
Prov. 31:30 says,
"Favour is deceitful and beauty is vanity but a woman that fear the Lord should be praised".
A Godly wife:
1. Has a Christlike character and humble disposition.
2. Guard her tongue and does not use it to inflict pain on her husband.
3. Put God first in everything she does.
4. Builds her home prayerfully
5. She honours her husband
6. She forgives her husband
7. Train her children in the way of the Lord and gently groom her husband to love the Lord more.

The Benefit of having a 4G wife.
3G is better but 4G is the best because it connect to the heart of God and her husband efficiently and consistently.
A 4G wife is
1. Good
2. Gorgeous
3. Great
4. Godly

May God give you such a wife as a man if you are not married, and if you're already married, receive grace for upgrade in your marriage.
Also, if you are a lady and not on the 4G network yet, connect with your maker and receive the grace to
upgrade to 4G now in Jesus' Name

HiFreda:
Thanks for the hair tip.
I'll try it out.

Bruno3000:
I'm right here, I ain't going anywhere.