₦airaland Forum

Acidosis:
I don't understand, how can a mother handle such a condition? open the door for anyone to enter and exit?

I don't see this as a crime. A 12 year of boy should be able to handle the home and her siblings over a short period of time. There are days some women lock their kids in the home, and head straight to the market.

These things happen everywhere, and everyday. I will do same to my ward, if I have an urgent need to attend to.

May be she failed to train her eldest child properly. However, I don't see any wrong in locking up your kid, a 12 year old at that, over a period of time. Of course, only an insane mother would lock up her kids without food, but how OP got that information is beyond me. Since you claimed the door was locked, how did you know the mother starves her children? You broke into their home to get the info?

Not everyone has neighbors, you're a bachelor I suppose, and I doubt you'd be able to look after another woman's children, 5 kids btw.

A 12 year old boy who "jailbreaks" is only being stubborn, and reacting to a failed parenting. For your info, 12 year olds are in JSS 3! Haba!! Some people hire 14 - 15 year old maids in the same country, so what's the issue??

If she'd listen, advise her to send the eldest to a boarding school. The same measure should be applied to the 6yr old when he/she completes her primary education.

modath:
Thank you, imagine that Caroline Danjuma & her philandering husband situation!

I laugh when I see all the yeye opinions people leave on her SM pages castigating her for staying with an unrepentant womaniser!!
Like 99.9% of them yapping on her timeline aren't envying her lifestyle!!

She knew what she got herself into, she needed someone to take care of the bills, otherwise she wouldn't have left the millions of hunks in nollywood for her papa age mate.

Ugly faced billionaire needs a balance so his kids won't come out looking like Shrek 2.0, each person already defined their roles!

Why are people trying to help her change the goal post mid game & asking her to leave her "daddy" (despite the sentimental excuse she posts defending the serial cheat), did she marry Joe average down the street? Wetin dem expect? & na dem go fund her lifestyle?


Person see person wey dey belittle service people & wait staff & didn't have it in mind that dem whole portion dey for front? Gerrarahia mehn!

edwife:
Nope Because i am not wired this way,i don't see what happens around me?
Like I said,there are few exceptions.

This is my submission.It is not only limited to this thread

edwife:
There is nothing wrong wanting the good things of life, both men and women desire the best. The problem with women is that we get confused and lose the essence of what is supposed to be simple.

edwife:
There are women out there willing to marry for love as long as the man has prospects but that only few of them. I won't be going far. Just here on NL, the answers most guys who opened threads asking if they can marry with an average salary of 100k get is alarming.

edwife:
Women talk about equality and all that,yet it is a taboo for a young guy to get married with an average salary? What's your own contribution? Okay he is making 100k,what if i make 150k? what's wrong with that? Even if i make nothing or as little as 40k,what happened to being contented and live according to our means.

edwife:
Those who contribute think the world revolves around them, you can't make decision,you can't tell me what to do,you can't you can't you can't.
The only control i read Nigerian men have over their wives is chores.He wants me to cook,to clean...what else? Nothing! He takes care of you? yes,the kids? yes,what the hell? How about you getting yourself a damn maid?

edwife:
The average Nigerian girl made Nigerian men to simply believe that a man is only worthy to be a husband, only when he must have acquired exotic cars, fat bank account, living in a duplex and having material possessions to make him stand a greater chance of meeting his dream woman, hence, Nigerian guys of today spend so much years working tirelessly to acquire this wealth, and in the process, lose interest and passion in marriage.

edwife:
Go check BellaNaija, rich kids no longer go for broke kids,men and women. They marry between them to avoid the headaches of having a wife who was cool and respectful but once a man loses his job,all that go to the bin especially if the woman is paying the bills.

edwife:
How many threads men open here talking about their wives not having jobs or not trying hard enough even when they bring little or nothing just to meet the basics. We can't say same for our sisters.It is either he is not appreciative,he doesn't do chores etc...

edwife:
Don't get me wrong here, I am not against men doing chores but what i noticed here more often it is not about the chores getting done it is about him doing it himself because I do it too. There is even one who had a maid at home but still wanted her husband to do chores because he was jobless .This equality thing has gone beyond mutual respect, fairness but i do 50%,you do 50%.I wash today,you wash tomorrow.

edwife:
Why must it be a man that has to take them out of poverty? Why can't they work just as those men worked to achieve whatever they have achieved? And you know that 90% of those men that will get them out of poverty are older? Because their mates are busy struggling and building their future.

edwife:
Long ago it wasn't a big deal starting from scratch with your man and making it. Not today. If there are women doing it,there are few.

edwife:
Females tend to marry men of higher social rank more often than men tend to marry females of higher social rank.Facts!

Mindfulness:
Thanks

modath:
It is not a one size fits all , each situation is peculiar, so one can't address different situations using same yardstick.. unfortunately that is the example i have of that particular situation......... There are some other yeye points like he doesn't wear native on thanksgiving sunday....

As for the woman compromising , seems you don't know the extent of delusion some pseudo-feminist are carrying around........

BTW, one of my friends Job is shift based & the man (not supporting, just stating facts) leaves dirty dishes for her, she vex ehn & i asked how he was when dem dey do boyfriend & girlfriend, she replied that they usually eat out or she does the dishes when they eat in... how come she was expecting miracle? She eventually got a non live in maid.... problem solved...

modath:
Nope, not at all.... this is about TV, each situation is unique but there is no compromise in that situation, it's purely capitulation.....

Let's go with this scenario..... The woman has been following one of this zee world/Telemundo menene, it somehow clashes with an Australian open semi final match that the man too has invested time in from the qualifying rounds..... How do we proceed?

modath:


Shy came bearing compliments, imma bookmark this or better still, print & frame!

On Topic; Real life experience...

I have a group of friends (about 5 women) who when we initially became close used to be standoffish cos they believed I wasn't sympathetic enough to their causes!!

They said I missed gender, that I should have come as a man!!! but how can I be sympathetic when someone informs me about a cold war with her hubby stemming from "He left dirty plates in the sink for me"... my advice of "wash it & KIM or throw it away & not make it an issue" seems to set them off.

One was having cable TV remote control supremacy with her husband & it was almost tearing her home apart, till I sat her down one day & asked her to get a dual view decoder because her man would only capitulate if he is only a doormat!!

She loves the usual female thingies, her husband is into the usual male, No meeting point, after she got it, she told me that the man would leave his own programme, join her in order "to spend time doing what she enjoys" which was never the case before...
Now I'm one of the "loves" of her life!

I've always been aware of life since I was a little child,Maybe cos I've always had a mind of my own, I don't get swayed by false appearances people put up!!

From childhood I've always known that to bring out the best in a man, You have to "allow him" take his role!! Nature designed women to be nurturers, going against that never ends well!!

plaetton:
Bingo!!

And that is the denial that the OP talks about.

Mindfulness:
Whatever rocks their boat. If they desire a rich man, then so be it.
I wasn't looking for money when I was single.

I wanted a man who would respect and understand me, someone who respects himself, someone who tries to be the best he can be, someone who would be a caring father, someone who is smart and with whom I can have interesting and inspiring conversations, someone who is independent, someone who is honest and trustworthy, someone who values family, someone who is relaxed and enjoys life as much as I do, someone who appreciates art and literature, someone who is interested in politics, economics, traveling and foreign cultures, someone who is fun and has a good sense of humor, someone who likes to socialize but also lets me have time on my own, someone I can cook with together, someone who is open-minded, someone who loves to develop, someone who is not only into my appearance but who wants to know my soul and connect on a deeper level and OF COURSE someone who is handsome and attractive.

I didn't want a jobless and lazy man but money was not what I needed either. I have my own.
.

Lezzlie:
Most of your submissions are passable, however, number 4 deals on market women. They are their own bosses and they work by their own time. They have the prerogative to employ an assistant or not.

They don't go to strange towns or booked in hotels for seminars and conferences.

And they don't go on transfers too. And running a market isn't as mentally and physically tasking as building a carrier. Women have been trading for years!

I've never found this well-worn catchphrase convincing "anyone that will cheat will cheat"

It's a quick resort to condemning defaulters while providing an escape from looking into the specifics.

purplish:
Here you go - https:///zkyr3NEgkW

Chanchit:
I'm even hoping they pass that bill, all I have to do is remind any girl/lady that wants to bill me that we are equal before the law.

Gender equality is a mind set, some ladies believe they are equal to a man while many believe they would never be equal, if you like pass the bill 10x.

byvan03:
I will make a fine man , I love the freedom that comes with manhood too. I can't bear to struggle with womanhood /motherhood in my next life jare. He said he must marry me in his next life,i made it clear that it can only be possible If he is coming as a woman or a gay man ..

byvan03:
As for the part in bold , he is a lot like me and there is connection on several levels. I don't believe I can stay married for 2 months if I married someone else.

Lezzlie:
I was being utterly sarcastic in the post you quoted with this.
My take? Women should balance out between family and career. With her preference titling more towards family.

I personally love teaching jobs and business where her time is flexible and freer.

Husbands should make their wives their next of kin in any circumstances. Men often die before women anyways, either by nature's call or fate's betrayal or health interruption; we always find a way to go first.


When fully career driven woman only begins to know what she missed after middle age and retirement, then the sad dawning that she's spent her youth and life running the roadmap and objective for a government who don't care two grains of beans about her, or a private firm who can replace her with the speed of Porsche 911.

She'll come back to the family and wonder where she didn't prioritise well.

Lezzlie:
The notion of role reversal needn't arise. Millions of women don't work and stay at home and tend to the family without the predisposition to cheat.

And whoever told you the mental and physical endurance of men and women are the same?

sureguy02:
Your N500 fell out from your pocket and someone picked it.
The person who picked it happens to owe You
N100. So, the person paid you the N100 with the N500 and you gave him back a change of N400.
How much did you lose in total.


Cc: lalasticlala

Dyt:
When I thought this couple was an inspiration to many out there that love conquers all
Same men everywhere

But to think of it
Might not be true

byvan03:
Why not? I married the only person I could stay married to, we are alike in a lot of ways. Though we must have to switch gender .

Lezzlie:
In providing a simple comprehensive answer, Yes.

Yes because divorce wasn't so paramount as it is now.
And it isn't about whether women worked or didn't.

It's that women who worked then, while prioritizing, placed emphasise on their families first.