₦airaland Forum

magicminister:
I am saying a man should mke sure his family is alright before he even gets married.
Once you are married, 99 percent of your attention and all belongs to your wife and children.
Your siblings and mother and father become a bit distant.
you still care for them but your wife and children becomes priority.

cherrymum:
abi o. my sister. not some sad low life peeps.

Mamatee07:
Nope he's saying it's not right or African for a man to cook which is crap. you can't marry a woman who works the same hours as you and pays bills like you and then decide only she will cook. The minute your wife does the same day hustle as you and pays equal bills you've dropped the African.roles . If she's come on to support your role as a provider then you must be ready to share hers too. She not a robot, that's why some women will be looking like their husbands mothers. The woman too can as well decide which modern roles she wants to take on. Let her also say I'll work but you pay all the bills because it's African for a Man to pay the bills even if you can't cook be ready to wash dishes

babygirlfl:
I can't wait too dear. Eagerly waiting for the arrival of our queen. I keep coming to have a peep on Nairaland just so I don't miss the birth of our queen.

Greetings to the ladies. Byvan03, chillisauce, Efemenexy , bukatyne, ifyalways etc.

Eketem:
Why does the mother want to wear herself out? Can't she ask her husband for help?

PresVA:
Tpiar , why all these foods na? ?

Tolatutu:
So you want to pick what traditional roles should remain according to what suits you riight It doesn't make you feel "UnAfrican" for your wife to help with bills but its "UnAfrican" for you to cook You're a clown

goodfornothing:
Men can clean the rooms, the dishes, the toilet, water the flower, sit their babies and do every other house chores but they should leave the kitchen for the woman! Men don't look good in apron. The sight irritates me!
If your wife is the Nairaland type that can't add maggi, vegetable, crayfish and water together to make a soup, I suppose you employ a female cook to handle that task. It's just my opinion!

Toks2008:
A good thing you have a first hand experience.

I honestly laugh at the foolishness of guys who spend their money divorcing a worthless LovePeddler...GOD FORBID.

treat her like a super LovePeddler she chose to be and even when she decides to leave your house,tell her categorically that she still remains your wife and divorce proceedings must be follwed before she can be wuth another man and she will be arrested if seen by you going about with another man expecially if u guys are legally married.

Infacty make a report to the police that your life is threatened by her.

This is a sure way to deal with an unrepentant lady.

banmee:
He is a complete m.oron. For some reason he want's to come out as a wise, knowledgeable person but ends up looking like a foolish uninformed id.iot. Stories he should be posting should go something like this. True story;

I met my wife when she was 20. She wasn't what you'd call the sharpest tool in the shed but i could tell she had serious potential, plus, she was and is probably the most beautiful woman on the planet. I know what you are thinking. You are thinking "yeah right. Everyone says that about their wives". Well, i can assure you that is not the case. You need to see her to believe. She still looks pretty much the same way she was when we first met. And that's after 3 kids. She's like a freaking vampire. Anyway, i digress. My apologies. I get carried away whenever i talk about her. We met and i knew she was the one. Problem was she was not up to what you'd call my "standard". Beauty alone can only get you so far. A person has to develop one's self in order to maximize their true potential. First thing i did was hurt her feelings. Really bad. I let her know she was too vain and she was not using her true potential; her mind. She was a model and probably thought she could be a model forever. Of course, she didn't like hearing the truth, no one does. But eventually she took it in stride, which is why i love her so much, and started developing herself immensely. She got so immersed in self improvement and ambition that she almost overtook me in that aspect. And 15 years later, she has her own successful business, a masters degree and a mother of three. Don't worry, warri boy no de come last. I had to step up my game as well. Not to brag, but i . . . . . . . . That's the beauty of our relationship; we challenge ourselves to be better. If either of us stumbles, the other picks up the slack. We motivate each other to do better. And this is not saying we don't fight. Our fight's are epic. Our makeup is even more awesome. This is the kind of message this moronic toks2008 should be spreading. Not this kindergarten psychology he attempts to spread. Marriage is a partnership. Not a slave owner relationship.

opribo:
It is a man's world. The Bible has given us charge over every creature that moves on the face of the earth, so we are at liberty to do anything we like including marrying as many wives as we want. Any woman that wants to gerraway will be dealt with ruthlessly.
Go and read Genesis1:26

IamMissMarvel:
There is nothing in the world that can keep a man who doesn't want to be kept.

magicminister:
There an adage that says "marry your mother before you marry your wife".
That simply means you should take utmost care of your mother first before you move on to start your own family.

Yes, if my brother was unemployed and i happen to be a multi-millionaire, it would be a shame on me and my family if my brother is not doing well in his own business or unemployed. it will be a shame on me if the woman that gave birht to me lives in a ghetto while i live in v.g.c.

Family first!!... that is my first, second and third rule....

Acidosis:
The people who sell these lotions and cream do not call it bleaching cream. We Nigerians are fond of calling every form of skin reaction "bleaching."

Someone mentioned funbact-A, I don't know whether there are two kinds of funbact-A, but the one I know is anti-eczema, and other skin stuffs.

That's how some Nigerians call La casera 'bleaching drink' and that it can burn one's intestine.

I've also heard people saying Coke and 'TEEM' soft drinks are meant for fat people who want to get slim.

Someone even said Coke is a stain removal thus it can burn the stomach.


Illiteracy/poor regulation is killing this country. People just throw all forms of irrational ideology at the people. Ask them whether they have scientifically tested any of these hypotheses. The answer is NO, why? A typical Nigerian will invest more on rumour than research.

If Funbact-A, an anti eczema cream, meant to clear reactions, end up bleaching your skin, why don't you report to NAFDAC?

Does it mean we know more than over 500 Pharmacists and other health professionals in NAFDAC?

Kalvan:
Oh shut up. While I find bleaching a minor's skin reprehensible, I'm tired of all these sanctimonious sermons on bleaching. Blacks don't bleach to look Caucasian; Caucasians don't tan to look black. These bleaching sermons come from low self esteem. We don't see Caucasians policing their race. Let people do what they want.

ttmacoy:
Yes some people can be rich and wealthy through employment.. When we say salary are we restricting this to those at junior levels who only earn small amounts or are we including those who rise up through the years and earn significant amounts?

We have people like Segun Agbaje of GTBank who was an employee all his life and is doing very well. Same with IBTC CEO and many others. The new Google CEO Sundar Pichai was recently paid $199m so yes people can get rich as employees.

Are you saying people who join companies like Goldman Sachs and work up to be partners are not rich enough? yes they may not be billionaires but remember not everyone aims to be a billionaire so we should stop using that as a threshold for success. This also applies to doctors who work up to be renowned specialists in their field or people who become partners at firms like Mckinsey or work up to very very senior levels at companies like Shell where they are paid in stock options.

You can also become wealthy as an employee if you are fortunate to work for a company before it goes public and have the opportunity to buy or receive shares aka Facebook, google employees and many others.

We also need to consider the fact that while you can be rich as a business owner, you also have very high chance of not making it. Majority of the businesses which start especially in countries like Nigeria close down within a few years as there is a lot more risk.

We need to recognize and accept that there is a place for everyone, those who are better at starting businesses and those who are better at growing businesses. They require different skill sets hence why the likes of Mark Zuckerberg aligned with the likes of Sheryl Sandberg to help build Facebook into the multi billion dollar company it is today.
Same with Microsoft with Bill Gates partnering with Steve Balmer and many others. It is the reason why Richard Branson is good at developing ideas but not running them.

Someone like Seun of nairaland has done well building such a valuable website, but it may take partnering with his version of Steve Balmer to take nairaland to the next level where it makes money not just for him, but for the nation through **** employing many Nigerians and even listing on the NSE. Facebook alone has created a lot of millionaire employees following it's IPO a few years ago so let us stop stigmatizing employees and making everyone run after business irrespective of if they have the skillset or not.

One thing I also notice is most people shouting entrepreneurship do so solely from a money perspective, but the likes of Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg have a passion for making an impact and finding solution rather than just be driven by quick money.

ronald4lif:
Depends on the climate the individual is working. For someone who earns a monthly equivalent of a million naira in the West such money will lead him to no where after taxes, rent cost, car insurance and other expenses.

They can manage to build a house after a couple of years but that doesn't translate to being wealthy. You're just a slave to the fat cat bosses and corporations.

But for someone earning a million naira monthly in Nigeria they can be seen as wealthy (in some cases) as the general expenses and cost of living is relatively low. But that doesn't also meant they are affluent as they would still live on budgets bargain.

I think for anyone to be seen as wealthy in global standard they should be looking at 5million naira a month income and an average of 50million a year. Anything less is just an average income earner and middle class status. And the likelihood of earning such income as an employee is near to zero and improbable.

So, the best and only way to become rich and affluent is via self employment and entrepreneur your own business or corporation. T[b]hat's just how I see it and I refuse to fuel the bank accounts of the fat cats forever[/b].

tartarus:
I guess men are now handbags that can be "snatched". Smh

No one snatched him, he willingly left his woman for another woman. He's an adult and knows what he wants. No one can be "snatched"

ADENIKETINA2015:
I share your sentiments. The couple should be groomed together for the good of the marriage so, that the other doesn't feel superior/inferior.

I know some might argue he's not the one in the spot light but they seem to be sharing the spot together.

Tallesty1:
Trophy? So submitting to him is an award? You gotta be kidding.

Listen we ain't talking about just any man here, we are talking about husbands and wives.

A man that comes to your dad's house to ask for your hand in marriage loves you already and you ought to submit to him until he gives you reason to do otherwise.

He will love you the more if you submit to him and will eventually make you the head of the home.

zuby4real10:
I will first thank God that she is alive but that will not stop me from punishing her.

johnson232:
story......

raumdeuter:
You dey mind dem. Most of those who say that rubbish have never been to the US or any western world. Na God say make some of us dey US else dem for tell us say na head dem dey use waka for Yankee

Hillary Clinton must have been a Nigerian wife for not divorcing her cheating husband

Nubian113:
Take responsibility for yourself. People treat you the way You allow them to treat you. Why blame men and 9ja lol blame yourself for allowing such treatment. Life is easier than we make it. But I'm not Nigerian so what do I know huh?

lovaleenny:
You shouldn't blame the men o but blame the women who allowed society to walk all over dem and dictate which is which...ever wonder why they say "there's no difference between the bully and the victim"...the day women stop allowing themselves to be victimized is the day they'll start enjoying the much needed emancipation.
We read countless of thread about women suffering alot in marriage when they know they can walk out if only they stop being a victim. Last two months an old thread resurfaced abt a woman who was married to a man who's a sex addict...after reasonable people advised her to leave while she still can...atleast to clear her head and figure things out she still didn't listen...now the update was she got infected with std...i saw it and i wasn't gonna give her my sympathy. As u lay ur bed kindly lie on it.
There are women who actually know what they want plus also know their worth and are wise in choosing a life partner and they are enjoying their marriage till date...whoever is telling a woman that she can't remarry after having kids is living in fool's paradise coz divorcees marry so where they get their facts beats me.
Point is: blame the women; they are the ones who forgot to raise their sons well but concentrated so much on their daughters; they are the ones who will advise their fellow women to stay in abusive marriage and with cheating horseband all in the name of not allowing anoda woman snatch ur man;please if person buy clothes and along the line it turned to filth wouldn't u stop wearing it and throw it away rather than walk the rest of ur life in filthy clothes or better still let someone else take it coz it sure won't do u good.
Am still gonna say it i will rather live a life of peace of mind and comfortability alone than stay in a broken marriage where ur partner doesn't respect u or give u the necessary dignity. Women should go where they are wanted, they should stop being a victim and take responsibility for their actions,stop allowing men walk all over you,know ur worth,stop blaming the men,and lastly find inner peace within yourself.
My 2kobo!