₦airaland Forum

Preferably Hennessy

Don't be a prude

Oh I forgot the kids. Damn!

TV01:
I would agree - or at leat hope - that it would'nt get to court, but technically he has committed rape. She was in no position to give informed consent - and the same is not required from her.


As per my response to CFW, what constitutes rape in marriage has not been clearly outlined. Your example above is technically rape, yet you are saying no charges should b brought

Perhaps I have a bit of a blind spot here? As I see this as much on an attack on marriage. Marriage is still the safest - statistically proven - relationship form for women and any children they may have. Rape to be treated as a heinous crime - absolutely - but why the focus on marriage? And particularly with wooly definitions of what actually constitutes rape.



Wish wan? Stout? Hennessey, or Courvoisier? And how mush? I'm prudish and stingy. Plus I don' wanna wake the kids !


TV

I like this.

Ewuro4:
1. North America

2.They fluently speak Engish and French. They pretty much understand our dialect in command but Can't speak fluently. Work in Progress. iPad Yoruba Application works great too. grandparents pretty much speak Yoruba to them mostly. And we both teach them ofcourse.

3. No I dont. Especially if you reside outside Africa. There's NO such thing. Fact.

4. Most of my kids friends are church goers and handy at home ( my tween daughter pretty much knows when moinmoin needs more water) and as far as I'm conserned, theyre mostly held accountable for their mistakes. I don't condone rubbish and I don't see that as an African way. Most Whites don't take bull too and this apply to Africans as well. Pleases and thank yous are mandatory, No boyfriends till high school , there're rewards for good grades etc. These are basic home training every parents should know regardless of Nationality.

I really don't get the "African way" besides The glorified Corporal Punishment.

5. And N to the O.. I DO NOT spank my kids.

Tenk.

goofyone:
For a guy who's still finding his feet regarding his self-confidence, I'd say he took the right step. Maybe if he was a confident chap already, it wouldn't have been so difficult to proudly put the firewood on his head and stride along for a mother-son bonding moment.

It is only his insecurities acting up. He probably always sees humiliation where non was meant.
Confronting his fears head on is only what will help him.
Doing those things he sees as menial tasks and realizing that it doesn't make anyone insult him or see him as a lower human being will help him cure himself

This isn't a big deal and I'm sure your mom didn't mean to humiliate you with the errand she sent you on.
Force of habit is just what's in play. Doing what she's used to doing and that is sending you on errands.

I'm older than you but I wouldn't hesitate to do that if my mom sent me to do it and as long as I have the physical strength to do it.
There's is nothing embarrassing about carting firewood with wheel barrow if your house is close to the area you purchased it. It won't reduce your 'big boy' status.

You should only be worried if she talks demeaningly or negatively to you. Or uses curse words on you.

Creating a thread because your mom sent you on an errand is like making a mountain out of a mole hill.

If I was you,this is how I will carry the firewood(on my head) no time for wheel barrow and follow momma home while gisting and laughing on the way.

Perfect mother and child re-bonding time.

CAMNEWTON4PRES:
good..............
men are too smart ...let's get rid of these ungrateful humanoids called women....even their own contraceptions were made by menlmfao

See? . And some people thought straight guys won't buy the idea.

Wait misogynist abi wetin he dey call himself and din@chi will soon come to register their support.
This is the best alternative for these group of guys

CFCfan:
Lol. I'm still learning

But here in California, it's only the monetary value of assets acquired before marriage, that won't be shared equally.
For instance, if I bought a $500,000 beach-front property before I got married, I won't be legally liable to pay $250,000 (half the property value) to my ex-wife.

what about the profits made from the property or investment.

Say you had a million dollar company before marriage and it grew to a hundred million during the marriage?

striktlymi:
A man is as weak as he makes himself. .

great

carefreewannabe:
I didn't know he created it because of such issues.

Obviously. Why the emphasis on the femaleness of the househelp. If he was getting a male house help,I wouldn't see hin concerned like this.

carefreewannabe:
It sort of irritates me that so many people think of s*ex because of the question the OP asked.
Is this not the country in which most people were brought up by conservative and highly religious parents, where children are trained better than anywhere else?

wondering

Story.
Even the OP is not 100percent sure of himself. If not he wouldn't create this thread

CFCfan:
Nice summary of the family/community property laws in most US jurisdictions

you're the lawyer here. Pls help us give more details.

That was the little I learned from legal advise when we bought our house.

Good if she doesn't spend nights in your house to reduce risk of temptations.

Body no be wood. So u don't enter unplanned parenthood.

And maintain professionalism at all times. No calling by first names or idle chit chat:

TV01:
That is not how rape is defined. She has to say an emphatic yes and she must be in a state - not high, drunk - to give informed consent. Indeed, the push is for consent to be continuously and proactivley re-evaluated.

Neither wifey or I really drink - maybe we are missing a trick. Is it different than with good blunt ?


TV

Yes that's not how rape is defined. But there are technicalities.
Would a man be considered a rapist if he makes love to his while both then are in a state of delirious wantoness?

Certainly no. And you'd be hard pressed to prove that in court.

Sensationalism at best and if not carefully taken for what it is, can prove to be distracting to the fact that there are real cases of r@pe in marriage.




Oh yes TV
You're missing. Try it. she will call you daddy if she never did before

Off topic.

Drunken sex is the best to that can happen to a husband and wife
Why would anyone file a r@pe charge under such circumstances?


On a serious note,matrimony gives consent by default so except the wife explicitly says NO or fights him off when he wants to get intimate with her,her consent is taken for granted because of the union they are in together, so it is not the same thing as when you're talking about a boyfriend/girlfriend or acquaintance relationships.

A rape will only be considered if she said no and the man went ahead or forced her to agree.
So where both parties are drunk and high and each considering the other their spouse,non can be accused of going over the border by making love to this spouse who said nothing in disagreement.

TV01:
If a man and his wife both drink, subsequently have intercourse and then fall asleep, if she awakens after the fact and cannot remember consenting to the act, he has technically raped her and can be charged.

This is even if they both drunk to stupor and neither can remember anything, and even if she does not claim to have been raped.

Are you satisfies that he has indeed raped her and should be charged and prosecuted?


TV

BuddhaPalm:
Hey Coco. Happy new year!

How's my name sake doing?

happy new year

Doing fine alright

delishpot:
We are saying the same thing. Like I clearly stated, the fact that she is his wife alone is enough to get her half of what they got while married. So she should not bother about the work part esp if she was earning her salary from that job.

ok

Gbam.

OP follow this advice.

crackhaus:
Lmao...please go ahead and get it on.

If your husband runs into you guys, invite him to join in on the action by telling him it was planned for him as a present

You're not weird, I can assure you that many young women and girls these days have at one time or the other fantasized/wondered what it would feel like kissing another female, fon.dling her b00bs, or getting head from one

Lmao!

carefreewannabe:
Some people do actually learn, we just need to be patient. The first step is to raise awareness.

Good luck and Godspeed

carefreewannabe:
He hasn't been on NL for weeks. Many interesting people disappear from NL.

Yea. he would have made that Hamm divorce thread very interesting

carefreewannabe:
Let it be the same question every day as long as there are still people who claim that there is no such a thing as rape in a marriage.

but they won't learn from the answers. It is more like they come back every so often to know if there is a change in status quo

I remember that thread
So you laughed too.
I was just laughing

Where is sagamite these days?

BuddhaPalm:
Lol. Crackhaus my main man. Such vitriol...

I concede, I've been known to have a special fondness for pússy and cheerleaders. Especially when they are attached to cheerleaders.


I no even read una posts. So don't even have enough facts to take sides.

You, yourself, should know too well you're the farthest thing from an ídiot. I think so too.

Except you think otherwise.

She said the exact same stuff to Sagamite on some thread I participated in, and I found it extremely hilarious!

It was as witty as it was funny.

Didn't mean to call you an idíot my good friend.

EbolaParasite: P

Post was edited later after I commented. So Sharrap

Same question every 3days.

crackhaus:
When you're done making presumptions @bold texts, maybe you can cool down and tell me what exactly makes her entitled to/deserve half his wealth…with cogent and reasonable points

If you're asking me what makes a husband or wife deserve half of what he or she contributed to build, I'm not going to answer that. At all.
Is there a reason why the number of years determine the percentage the 'dependent' spouse gets?

It is obviously a question you know the answer to but would rather go in a merry go round to try circumvent.

crackhaus:
No need for all this long story, the report already indicates that there was no prenup - I honestly don't know where you're getting your 'thoughts' from.

So who is the lucky person between both of them Cococandy?


I see you called him stingy instead, I was almost going to ask you how someone could be referred to as greedy for something that's already his...

Ok no prenup? I missed that part
My bad.

See I said he's lucky. He is really lucky.
Without a prenup and he's only losing so little. He's the lucky person here. Others of his calibre have been severely hurt by divorces like these.
Why are you even on his side? His loss was extremely minimal. You should be like "yea that's my guy"
abi You think the wife doesn't deserve anything after 26yrs of marriage?

He's both stingy and greedy too.

He doesn't think 26yrs deserves a bit more out of the plenty money they are swimming in.
Like make it just 3billion?


_{Ok on a lighter note though all these plenty money these people are treating as nothing.
If they just give me 1million I will stop typing and go take a nap}

Not boring at all.

blank:
Here goes. The key was to have absolute trust. First of all, we have a joint account and then we have individual accounts whilst still being signatories to each others account. Thus, anyone can transfer or withdraw from any account. We started this from when we started dating so we kinda had a rhythm by the time we were getting married. He prepares the annual budget while i do the monthly budget and try to make sure it is adhered to.



For the parts you didn't mention, I ensure he spends at least 10% of his monthly income on himself. If not he can wear rags just so that he can have something to give out. And you know for his position, he needs to maintain some semblance of affluence. As for me, he buys me stuff cos i find it hard buying expensive things for myself. I remember as a student, the most expensive shoe i had was the one he bought for me. I used to save my spending money to buy now useless shares.

For my kids, i do most of the buying for them cos he is just out of his league on that one and also foodstuff. Also, i ensure I pay the nanny myself so that they know i am their employer, lol. Importantly, if any request for assistance is to be paid, it is usually from the other spouse's account just a way of us letting you know that the person is aware. This is to avoid people sneaking around thinking they are playing on someone's intelligence. The badside of that is that if someone is not given, they tend to think it cos of the other spouse.

We have people we support monthly and that comes out of my account. Don't know why we just defaulted to this but it is what it is. Hope i didn't bore anyone.

EnlightenedSoul:
Lol, idk Coco, I was just shocked. MILs are made out to be some sort of universal evil tho. It's kinda sad, isn't it?

na so we see am. I agree some mils can be a handful but the generalization now makes dils go into marriage prepared to fight.

Sad indeed

crackhaus:
Lmao...

How did she help him build his worth?
And how is it that the person who refused $975m but asked for more is the one that's not greedy to you?

Cococandy, abeg keep sentiments aside - that woman is just lucky her charms were enough to distract the man from drafting a prenup...it's her only saving grace.

ehn? She worked for him. Are you telling me his company was worth 18billion in 1988 when they got married?
She worked harder than everyother shareholder in that company being a staff and a wife of the CEO.
Besides,you don't know one's spouse contributes a lot to their success?

Me I think he signed a prenup if not,he's supposed to be losing more.

I'm not being sentimental. If I was, I would say she deserved about 9billion.
I'm being practical now. He should just make it 3billion and stop being cheap

Even in cases where they have been established before the marriage(like his own), it could still not cover it because it is deemed to have transcended time and the lines of ownership blurred such that it is not easy to determine in exact proportion what belongs to who and how much they have contributed or sacrificed to make it happen,hence it becomes community property.
Community property states can make divorce a horrible mess despite prenups or quit claim deeds.
Those documents offer only MINIMUM protection in such states. i mean it is some protection but not as much as the person who's wealthy would want.

Those things are tricky mehn and vary from state to state.
He's lucky he lives in Oklahoma (I'm assuming that also where the divorce was filed)
It is not a community property state
That's why he's able to get away with offering less than a billion(about 11percent or so) of his net worth.


I assume he also signed a prenup. If not her lawyer would have been pressing for much more.
You never sabi these shark lawyers

The way I see it,she just wants her share of the family money (afterall they are rich and probably have lots in savings) and not after his investment.i think mr man is just being stingy.he can offer more than that

property that is owned by one spouse before the marriage is sometimes referred to as the "separate property" of that spouse but there are instances where the community can gain an interest in separate property and even situations where separate property can be "transmuted" into community property. The rules for this vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. By agreement or action the married couple can turn (transmute) separate property into community property, including by commingling community and separate funds in one account...

By action she could pass off her work for the company as interest that amounts to community ownership. And a sneaky lawyer prenup or no prenup could find a way to make that work in her favor. Two people of the same level of wealth can get different divorce settlement results in the same courthouse from the same judge depending on the intricacies of their situation. But hey she's getting only 11percent or so. He's one lucky morrafocka

crackhaus:
The fact that the definition of a prenup cites this clause: "...in the event of dissolution of marriage, all future earnings, property, and assets..." - means that a man doesn't necessarily have to be wealthy to enter one.

That aside, he married this woman in 1988 well after he became CEO of the company - the old man was no where near poor when they got married.


@bold text, please explain how half the wealth of a man rightfully belongs to his wife.

freecocoa:
If I believe this story make I bend, someone told you your mother has to die before she marries you and you asking what to do? Unless the girl don put you inside bottle, mschew.

even if she thinks it, she will NEVER say it to his face.
Do people joke with death like that?
See how this 15yr old OP is keeping people busy commenting on his porkies

EnlightenedSoul:
Wth, so she said that to his face? About his mother? I don't think she cares about the guy.

Have mom and gf ever interacted?

you believe that tall tale by a bored teenager looking to elicit reactions from posters?

Una too dey lie for this nairaland. What girl will say something like this to her guy? To his face too?
Fear God o