₦airaland Forum

arvinsloane:
Sorry !the commandment is not location dependent. Be it lagos or kafanchan

bukatyne:
Omalicha,

You get time. These days, I just drop my POV and move on (in some cases un-follow the thread till I see a mention)

Is it not a few days back a lady started a thread on a cheating husband who told his wife and kids to enter public transport while he picked up his mistress and her family?

Men have not abandoned their families and run off with their lovers

Let them keep deceiving themselves

'It is physical, it is spiritual, it is emotional etc.' na them sabi

Imagine Op telling me that Bible does not solve everything but it will most definitely solve the headship of men and submission of wives.

datalossvictim1:
You misunderstood her statement. Read it again. A feminist would understand her point.

drlawizle:
What bebe2 said is a good explanation...cheating is wrong on all fronts agreed but the motives behind it are absolutely different....a man can cheat on his wife and still treat her like d goddess dat she is, love her with allhis heart and take excellent care of his children....wat does dat mean: sex with another woman is just a game to d man...have you ever wondered why a man can still sex a woman he hates so much & still enjoy it (as long as she's sexy)but a woman will find it difficult to even if he's rich & handsome.

On d other hand a woman dat goes out of the 3 reasons I mentioned earlier is capable of murdering his husband and selling off his property and running of with another man...its difficult for it just to be fun for her...you yourself know you were not wired and created dat way... we are all gifted and unique in our own different ways....theres really no point tryin to behave like a man that doesnt attach emotions to sex or thinking men lie when dey say d woman means nothing to him....cos she actually means nothing to him...I understand dat it hurts d woman which is d reason I will never cheat on my wife but what I want you to understand is a man cheating on his wife is absolutely different from a woman cheating on her man.

kandiikane:
How can you say you don't like being misunderstood when you have not made yourself to be understood. Stop quoting me if you don't get the point I made because all this your long post is baseless and has nothing to do with my first post.

kandiikane:
Cococandy I did not insult you, if I did you would know.
As I have written try to read because it just seems like you just want to oppose my statement just for opposing stake. Nothing is wrong with being a mother and wife, I never said it was. My problem is with this statement, "a mother has two roles in life" the op meant a woman because a mother doesn't necessarily mean a wife and a wife doesn't necessarily mean a mother. If you don't find that statement demeaning then I guess you are the type I am talking about. You are arguing baselessly because the point I made has nothing to do with a wife and mother but to those whom's only aim in life is to become a wife and mother and those who believe that's the only things women are there for. It's like saying, all I want to do is become a gold digger, in many relationships it is the man who provides financially therefore your role in society is to sit and eat that money.

50calibre:
Oh I understand!! So you're prescribing un-forgiveness?

MizMyColi:
Yeah right.
If concurring with what she wrote in red makes me gullible, I couldn't possibly have enough in one lifetime.

Cococandy Ma'am, I want to be like you when I grow up

Babaji111:
Women do forget that no matter how men have sex outside their homes, there won't be any noticeable physical or whatsoever changes that sex would cause on them. But women having sex illegally has a lot of physical and biological effects on them. Few among the effects includes: 1. Loss of virginity (for spinsters)
2. Unwanted pregnancy
3. STDs
4. Loss of natural firmness in breasts
5. Virginal enlargement or looseness
6. Disrespect to her spouse (if she is getting 'IT' better outside)
7. Loss of morality and sound faith
8. Lack of interest in her spouse
9. Lack of interest in spending good time at her marital home
10. Psychological defects in rare cases......etc

So, NO reasonable man will forgive his spouse for exposing herself to the above. This is not a matter of Beijing Conference it is NATURE that made man and woman differ .

ochon:
The simple truth is, women are the reason why society frowns badly at women cheating, while they moderately condemn men's cheating.

I said so because, while the society is to be blamed for such laws/norms INITIALLY, women of this age should've emancipated themselves from such mental slavery and refuse to stand a cheating partner. If the women don't stop tolerating cheating men, the status quo will never be changed. The situation favours us, men, and hell will freeze over before they relinquish such rights to the women.

At the end of the day, it's even the women that supports such norms. For example, women are quick to call their fellow cheating women, "slùts," but when they tag cheating men "bad boys" "ladies men" "playas" Etc. Some women will say, "I don't care if my husband is sleeping around, as long he doesn't bring them inside my house, I'm okay". WTF!! This is the highest form of low self-esteem. Some women takes their stupidity to a greater level by publicly fighting with the mistress of their lover. No shame whatsoever!! They fight and kill each other while the cheating man is allowed to sit back and laugh at their madness.

So until women say enough is enough, society will keep allowing men to walk away with cheating while they get scolded and called slùts.

I'm not claiming to be a saint that has never cheated, I'm just saying, just like I as man will hardly forgive a cheating woman, such treatment should be meted out to me if I cheat on my woman, shikena.

50calibre:
Bravo!!! The queen of self-deceit has spoken!!

Please can you stop making noise & misleading gullible young girl?

If your husband cheats on you, what's the worse you're going to do? Divorce? Hahahaha don't make me laugh.

vicadex07:
So you mean women should start cheating as much as men

kandiikane:
If you cannot read don't refer to a post. How can it be a lazy person's ambition when my post read lazy people without ambition.

@topic:
Question:
Man: what do you want to do or be in life or what role would you want to play in society?

Woman: i want to be a mother and wife.

Only an aimless person would think this is perfectly ok.

jnrbayano:
But you were for a while before Bootybuttchic rescued you.

mztubsy:
cococandy,God bless you.I swear.

CoolHunk:
Ever heard of an Ebube Nwagbo? She looks just like you.

bennyrazz:
I'm not trying to justify cheating but we must ask ourselves pertinent questions. Why cheat? Some men cheat with ugly women and by the time you see their wives, she looks like an Angel and you begin to ask yourself, what is the man seeing in this ugly woman? His wife is pretty naa? If a woman is cheating, what are her reasons? As a man you provide everything for her financially, you do your work on the bed perfectly and yet, she wants other men then something is wrong.

coogar:
of course, it's in the past but the generation that witnessed it & their immediate offspring aren't letting go. in another 20-50 years, all of them should be dead & hopefully, the stereotyping would end.

it saddens me how people still hold on to dark history. and you know what they say about forbidden things......ijebu babes all of a sudden became the most attractive of the lot & it has to do with the fact that it's almost forbidden in nearly all the other yoruba states.



they still have the osu thingy in the east. i cannot imagine taking a sweet babe to ituku ozalla only for my family to say she's an osu....i would start a riot. osu-gini? do osus have 3 brëasts or what is forbidden about them? me thinks we should get rid of all the folks older than 70 in our midst in nigeria, they are the ones holding the progress of that country & it's unity.



i still cannot believe cococandy is an ada owerri.

damiso:
I don't doubt that part of history but that was a long time ago and not a time where most tribes don't come out smelling of roses.As you said all the other sub groups had slave merchants as well and I guess the capitalists in them made them take advantage of that fact.Not nice but it's in the past and most people who have issues with them seem to be from the jazz and being stingy issues.Also I forgot to add earlier there is this notion (hence why some people say I can even stand the men ) that ijebu women are domineering as wives, mothers, mother in laws etc.Not saying that might not be true of SOME ijebu women but it's a stereotype that is further fuelled by some of these women being very financially independent.

Stereotypes are just what they are pre conceived notions about a set of people and I think it's just best to deal with people on an individual level.I know owerri ladies, (cococandy is mbaise owerri?)Benin or edo women etc too have to deal with those stereotypes as well so like I said deal with the Individual based on their own behaviour.

Stillfire:
Power is intoxicating. That is why there are checks and balances in every sane establishment to avoid tyranny, despotism and dictatorship. Now the question is who checks patriarchy? And how can the so called 'subjects' under the auspices of patriarchy be protected? Are the subjects eternally doomed to the whims and caprices of the 'leader' in a system that has proven many a time without reasonable doubt to have been intoxicated with power, by controlling and dehumanizing the sensibilities of what constitutes a major and very important half of the human race? What rights do these 'subjects' have? Are these rights set in stone, in law- signed and dotted in countries like Nigeria that is being ruled by men and being destroyed by men (I have to add)? No human being should be trusted with power, so there's an absolute need for a check and balance system to protect the rights of the so called 'subjects' in this system of governance called Patriarchy.

Feminism checks this. Just as congress does not give Obama rest, so will feminism. Womanhood must be protected at all cost in a patriarchal system!

Long live feminism! Viva Feminism!

Truckpusher:
I personally saw that hoe with one of the bigwigs here in the South South in a hotel only meant for these big boys ,and I was like .....WTF!

She's a cheat ,whatever- the in-laws should have seen it coming before the marriage.

Most of them fucck around with big shots especially politicians and oil bunkery dudes.This isn't a secret anymore.

Ini Edo abeg continue your Toto business ,movie industry no dey pay again but you must maintain your fake lifestyles

In fact it got to a point that if you have your 350k and 750k for some of them , you're sure to hit any of those actresses in Nollywood all through the night.
This country sha........smh

bennyrazz:
In life it is easy to criticise those who have fallen or those who are about to fall simply because you are not in their shoes. Do you think its the wish of some men out there to cheat on their wives? you've just be typing bs to me as if those that are out there don't comprehend what I'm saying. If you as a woman don't understand anything, wait till you time comes. Go and attend marriage seminars, attend workshops. This life is beyond what you see with you two eyes, it is far beyond that. If you are a woman and you are out there, pray for your husband, pray for him against strange women. Pray to God to scatter whatsoever relationship he may have with strange women. Do you think this is a joke you and your gang want to amuse yourselves with? There are some undergraduate girls in university these days and the only men they go after is married and comfortable men. Their believe and mentality is that, if the man can take care of his wife, he can also take care of them. They start working on the man spiritually simply by getting his pictures, names etc they take it to one baba to do all sort of spells and before you know it, they try and get close to the man, before you know it, the man is already in love with them. Do you think its normal for the man to buy a car for them when he hasn't bought for his wife? No, lets face it. You think most of these things you see in nollywood movies are lies? Some of these girls sleep in coffins, burial grounds etc some wash their womanhood with concoctions, any man that sleeps with them is a goner. Some use perfumes, when they pass near you and you inhale their perfumes, you are gone. All these things are all hypnotizes. It requires a stronger force to clear off these things and some only wear off when the man goes broke. You think those waist beads or ankle chains or toe rings you see these ladies put on are for fashion? Some use this thing they call tiro to lace their eyes, as a man, once you have direct eye to eye contact with them and they wink at you, omo your own don be o. You see entertainers wearing dark shades, you think it is a joke? Some women naturally poses the aura of seduction. Everyman they meet wants to sleep with them. As a man, some women meet you and the only thing you think about is "I must sleep with this girl" even when you are married. And by the time you sleep with them, you just want to continue to sleep with them until they push you away. Even prophet Elijah in the Bible fled away from Jezebel. He ran almost how many kilometres?? I can go on and on but I hope this little piece of mine will spurred married women out there to continually keep their husbands in prayer. If you still don't understand, go and watch the film "legend of the seeker" watch the character "mother confessor"