₦airaland Forum

Na you sabi.
I'm speaking for myself.
There are women who will fight over a man as we all know.
There are those who will endure polygamy because they feel they can't help it.

But for myself,I'll only share a man unknowingly. That's if I never find out.
But if he's the type that considers philandering part of his culture,I'm out.

I won't suck a diick I know very well that's been in another woman's pucci
(Forgive my language)

The thought disgusts me.

If you want the days when polygamy wasn't a problem,you can buy a time machine and go back in time or convert to islam.
That's the only way you can have 'peaceful' polygamy

I'm sorry things have changed. Just get with the times already

50calibre: Hahahaha that's so not true. I will have to see a serious level of respect & commitment if I'm not to keep side chics, else I don't care.

Polygamy is very much part of African culture, I've seen many men with multiple wives & they all gracefully play their various roles. Polygamy was never a problem before, why should it be now? People up their game in the face of competition.

A woman has got to be special to claim exclusive rights to a man, that's our culture.

make a T shirt out of those and wear it.in case there is any more data loss.

Nonso23: Just for the records...

See wooing tactics..
Liars

SMH _{the professors of life}

I knew that could have sounded judgemental. It wasn't my intention which is why I made sure to add 'not judging you'

I also stuck to the thread by saying you should wear what makes you comfortable.

But it doesn't change the fact that Nigerian married ladies like to feel uppity towards single ladies.maybe not intentionally but because that's how most of us were raised.
You hear ladies say stuff like 'I'm married now. Call me madam'
You know? things like that.

The paragraph I quoted implies that too.
You don't want to addressed as a single but RESPECTFULLY as a married woman.
Meaning that there's a difference between the way single and married ladies are addressed based on the marital status and not their personal worth.

Anyway no harm meant.
And I'm sorry if I offended you.

IyawoToBe: wow. I wasn't expecting that. We are all different and we interprete things differently. I don't think I should be responsible for how you interprete my post. But for the records, I didn't mean or imply any of that. Btw, respect is a psychological need and everyone deserves to be respected. No one said singles don't deserve to be respected as I was single some months ago and being married now hasn't changed a thing about me.

This is my first ever thread on nairaland and I wouldn't like you to bring me into your 'judgement cubicle'. We can always read and post without passing judgements. Now you want to subdue the original purpose of the thread and turn it to an argument by bringing in a controversial issue (whether or not singles deserve respect).

In some ways that may be considered true,but for fairness,I'd rather we are considered equal.

RaphaellaDD: I don't know why females struggle for gender equality. We are quite obviously superior to men .

Lyndaroyce good to see you again

Lmao.

Carry go bro. Nothing do you.
Even HIV is afraid of you

scribble: Delusional much?

Madam cococandy or whatever you fancy yourself, the men that don't cheat are the men that don't get caught.

And it's not all side chicks that have stds...just fyi

Since keeping it real is now bragging I overstand you. You're the type that think men cheat just to count scores...

No we are wired to want as many beautiful women as we can afford....

Men that don't cheat with random ratchets are the ones with successful homes

Eg. Can you imagine Senate president screwing some random ratchet hole?

His wife knows how far but his heart is as large as his political canvass and my dear that is enough for any real woman....

How can I only descend in one womanliness all the days of my life....

St Peter no go happy with me Sef. Nonsense.

how did you make that subtle switch from being addressed as a single lady to being addressed respectfully as a married woman.

The bolded is the problem we women always have.
What's that supposed to mean?
Does anyone deserve special respect because they are married?
It's comments like this that make young single women to feel like they are deficient and not worthy of respect because they are single.
It's what's also makes married ladies to look down on single ones as if having a man suddenly made them better and more respect worthy than a single person

You'll be addressed respectfully if you deserve it. It shouldn't have anything to do with your marital status.
Not judging you though.

That said,just wear what makes you comfortable. As long as you and your husband are cool with it,it's ok.
One shouldn't be going around town seeking to be indentified as married like it's a badge of honor.
It's your privacy. It's no one's business.

Well if you want to tell him,you can still go ahead to tell him the measures you've put in place to ensure the guy doesn't reach you anymore.

At least he was the one who added the guy on your bbm,he can't blame you if the dude keeps chatting you up.

It is well sha.

Godmystrength: You are right.....Just that he is just a funny guy. unpredictable. telling him might even cause more harm than good...... this is a guy that, if you tell him someone is disturbing you, can blame you and say you are the one that put yourself in a position where someone can have the audacity to ''toast'' you. As if you even need to do anything before anyone ''toasts'' you......

It is guys like you that make people say all men are cheats. Now for your mind you're bragging but you don't know how silly you're portraying men to be with this your comment.

On another thread if a lady says all guys cheat,you'll carry your sword and start fighting as per the victim of male bashing.
But here you are lending credence to the voice of those who like to accuse all men of infidelity

Because you don't have self control doesn't mean other men are like you.
Stop deceiving impressionable young boys into thinking that self control is impossible.
And stop excusing your lousiness by making it seem like every other man is like you.

You're on your own.
If you can't keep it in your pants,go for counseling or wait until you've gotten the randiness out of your system before you think of settling down.

Don't get married with your p5nis controlling your reasoning and then make an innocent girl's life miserable with your designers collection different STIs and STDs

scribble: dont dare the man sha

if he prefers the side chick, then u are history

most successful marriages, the woman just acts like the traditional African woman and pretends she doesnt notice

this is due to the fact that it is impossible for a man to only be attracted to one woman all the days of his life...

he made a concession to marry you, allow him have his mistress in peace

That's for women with low self esteem.
For me,I'll break up with a guy who's double dating me than live my life trying to out do another lady on the side.

Which mouth will I even use to ... You know

When I can't for the life of me imagine where it has been dipped into.
Yuck!

50calibre: Having a side chic is like having a spare vehicle, it's advisable.

Chics behave better when they know they have competition.

Always on the replay

Dexema: U must like Sia`s chandelier alot

I always feel like crying whenever I visit lagos.
Phew
It's no place for ajebutter people I swear.
If I want to take public transport,it's always war.hurt myself several time trying to board a bus.

If I decide I can't handle the stress and take a cab to and fro instead,I spend like 7- 8 thousand in a day on transport.
Calculate that in a week.

And I can't ask my host to leave his work to drive me around.

I love my quiet Imo state.
For calm souls like us.

Depends on the family

fr3do: Una people too dey charge

Ok. You too

sunnedee: Okay... Heard some stuff but never mind...
Have a nice day..

Supported.
He has a way of talking sense into young men.

Nashville too
And bellong
And thorpido

Sunkyphil: dis person should b among d counsellor orikinla

Great tips

They said 44 before o
BTW was the building occupied by South Africans alone?

Yelx

sunnedee: You are mbaise?? Hmmmm.....

So someone must have a sad story to tell before their marriage can be considered real?
What if they don't want to share?
Na by force?
I'm pretty sure that any ardent follower of this section must have been touched by one person's story or another.
Do they need to go ahead and start sharing their own sob stories(which they've probably gotten tips on how to handle from other people's plight)
Just to make readers happy?




Anyway
@godmystrength. You said your husband accepted this guy's friend request on bbm after you deleted him?
That shows he's very very keen to know every single conversation that goes on between both of you. This maybe because he feels the guy is sooo into you. He doesn't want to take any chances.
I suggest you tell him what's happened the last few times the guy contacted you.
If he stumbles on any new info he didn't know before,it might seem like you were hiding stuff from him and that could translate to you falling gradually for the guy.

Don't let someone who doesn't respect his marriage ruin yours.
I pity his wife.
She lives under your shadow. I'm sure he must be comparing her to you in everything she does. Too bad.

Not for me.
My guy's b'day and specials days eats into my pocket too.
The guys must not do everything all the time.

iwakolewa: The only effect I know/see is that borrowed cultures are eating deep into our pockets, especially for the guys/men, valentines day expense is expected to be on the guy,what of birthdays,on her birthday, you hgot to take her out,on your birthday, you also got to take her out,weddings these days are so expensive because of international standards, even the couple will do dance drama for their guests on their wedding day #going back to bed#

Not in my area.
Most of our cultural celebrations are still intact.

We even celebrate CHRISTAIN christmas with masquerades.(Funny right?)

U wan try mbaise people?

Our new yam festivals
Kola festivals
Okwukwu rites
Etc etc dem plenty sha

Lmao
I repented since last year.
Whoever you saw lashing out at anyone last month wasn't me.

Maybe my evil twin

pickabeau1: I'm also watching u

Have u forgotten you were on fire last month...

Tongue lashing everyone in sight...

Seems you've calmed down now

PS This thread was inspired by the chimamnada thread

By you and one of your cowives...she dey correct grammar..that girl.. Lol

Will try it tomorrow. Thanks so much aunty bebe2

bebe2: Aunty coco so u want my recipe for the spagh bol?

I don qualy ooo ( qualify)

U r the 2nd person to for dis recipe o

Ok to the point now wey my head don swell finish .

U will need
mince meat
Mixed veg or mushrooms ( optional)
Tin of chopped tomatoes
Tomato puree
Onions
And regular spices.


In a heated pan add a table spoon of olive or sunflower oil, then throw in some chopped onions, n ur mince and start to stir until it d mince changes color and u can no longer see red meat.

Now add your chopped tomatoes , pepper and spoonful of tomato puree.

Cover it to boil till the tomatoes is cooked add ur know cube, curry powder and salt to taste.

Stir it and add ur mushrooms or mixed veg , cover it and let it boil. Turn off the heat as soon as it boils.

Leave for a few minutes, and serve on top of ur spaghetti.

U can also add kidney beans instead of veg or mushrooms and dat wud be ur chili con carne. Serve wit rice, jacket potato or yam.

Don't worry I'll catch you. ;

pickabeau1: Nah... Not me....

I'm fresh and so clean clean...

U?..... ...

You don see me wey never repent abi?

I've repented too.
And I've gat my eyes on you.

I'll catch you and remind you when you start again

pickabeau1: ....

Nope..that was my past life

You self be internet warrior

OP you're guilty too

Smh

Yea I'm fine.
Me too I'm tired.
I think I'll just go to bed

Goodnight dear.

edwife: Babes,i am good dear.Just don't have strength to write today.

Hope you good.

youngds: OMG... Op is so damn good looking, jiz aw did u manage to av time for NL?

Thank you.

Erm do you mean good looking people are supposed to be so busy looking at the mirror so they don't have time for NL

Ok I'm just kidding.