₦airaland Forum

Klass99:
Lol , I was surprised to see the thread resurrected after such a long time.

I remember when it first came up, I had lost access to my old account and had to view it as a guest.

Energy saving mode, will be my new mantra moving forward. I like your response

MiddleDimension:
it buttresses my point about all these issues. beyond the eloquence, there are issues which the activism cannot and will never solve. they just have to find a way to make sure you are monster with two horns in your head and a tail wagging behind your back.
even all the people i mentioned, did not even reply.

Hathor5:
Childish behavior of people who have nothing meaningful going on in their lives.

I would even ask her where she prefers to sit. [As long as I don't have to sit on the roof or in the trunk, I am good to go.

bigfish3k:
How can this fine boy kill himself because of a girl he is finer than.
An olosho looking girl for that matter

Guys false harassment /rape is real. I have witnessed it. [Most women are bad if they mean you

igboamakaaa:
In all this fiasco, the people i pity most are the "Nigerian Soldiers" from southern Nigeria who always get posted to the North East to "die in service of their beloved country".

They just died for nothing, leaving Widowed wives and fatherless children that will be abandoned by the same government they were wasted for. See the people that they died trying to capture, wearing asoebi and celebrating in a lavish "Graduation ceremony" after being pampered and giving presidential treatment.

They are now being released back to the society to continue from where they stopped. Surely another set of southern soldiers will be sent to be killed by them again, and the loop will continue till infinity.

What a wasted life

FireRain:
. Well done guys.

Chef cococandy, it's been quite a while I see eyecandies from you.

Greetings to everyone here,

Prestonn:
Village kitchen


My catfish pepper soup

My favourite part is the head, no body touch that in my house

Seems like somebody tell this fish seller make he dey cut the head small... I don dey notice am small small. Why e go be say na the part make I dey eat na they always small pass..

GboyegaD:
Abeg, mumsy has a long lay over at O'Hare next weekend so I'm driving down to come keep her company. Do you know places where one can drive to just to while away time since this is covid era and one needs be careful.

Juliusmomoh:
And if any girl chop my money OYO cos she will be going to see her lord

DemonInvoker:
There are men that don't take No for an answer after leading them on just like Juliusmomoh here.Ladies Take Note,Let your NO be No so you don't give them a reason to Kill you or end up getting Raped.

Goodybagyo1:
How can you eat somebody's hard earned money and think you'll just go free. For IB wen I know

Petyprincess:
Come to my house,i can cook the Yoruba version for you

NerdyRudeGyal:
Nigerians do treat "marriage and procreation as one and the same". Telling Nigerians not to have kids or to control the number after getting married isn't a bad idea, but it would be a futile effort b|c most Nigerians get married with the intention of having kids, love sex, believe in the idea that babies bring blessings, may face pressure from relatives to have kids/more kids/a male child, etc. There was one thread I was reading last week in which a NLder was seeking financial assistance to pay for her hospital bills, buy medicine ('drugs') and baby things. When another NLder asked why she and the spouse didn't wait until they were financially-capable to have a second child her exact reply is that having one child is like being barren. I can't write yoruba well but I recall she used the word "agon" (barren woman) and knew what that meant after watching a Nollywood movie with that title last year, starring Mercy Aigbe. Who knew having only one child is synonymous to being barren? So, while your suggestion is quite good, I doubt the feasibility in Nigeria. I suppose urging people to have enough money/savings before getting married or at least sit down and create a budget if they know they'll be having a child soon after getting married (hospital costs, food, baby things, etc, should be considered) might work. But iunno. It's hard to advice Nigerians, lol.

Over here, you can have as many kids as you want without paying a dime (no hospital costs or whatever). Parents even receive monthly tax-free benefits from the gov't for having a child. Yet, even with all the free stuff available (healthcare, education, money, etc), I don't see citizens having too many kids. In fact, what you've suggested is what I've seen here - people getting married and deciding not to have kids, or controlling the number (one or two kids max). I know one couple who have been married for 3 years and they're still saying they're not ready to have any child b|c they want to travel the world first (they take several vacations every year). Anyway, people should live their life as they deem fit.

LewsTherin:
Even Jesus, whether you believe He is God, a god, a prophet, a great teacher, whichever, even Jesus said "the poor will always be with us"

Even in a poor remote village, there are still people there considered poor by others who themselves admit they are poor.

So should those who are poor not aspire to something? Anything? Should they not hope that by getting married they would be able to achieve....something? That something may not be clear, may not even make sense to you and I, but it is all they can hope for. Afterall, hope without which, men die.

Should they not aspire to getting....something, anything, in their state of despair and hopelessness? Even if only the love and companionship of yet another person who may just be as poor or even poorer than them?

Should they be denied the hope that maybe their children would be able to break the cycle of poverty they have found themselves in? And be kept from having children because they are poor and in a cycle of poverty?

To quote Gandalf, "even the wise cannot see all ends"

I have a question though. How "comfortable", how "stable", how much in earnings can be considered as enough to go ahead to get married and not be considered as too poor for marriage?

Hathor5:
@Firstnebo

This is a very good piece of writing and you raised many valid points. I also appreciate your final message in which you say that people should be fighting the system and not the victims.

When I saw the thread I didn't understand why people would treat marriage and procreation as one and the same thing. You can have one without the other. You can get married and not give birth at all or at least control the number of children you are going to have. Is the system so broken that we can't make birth control accessible and teach couples about family planning?

I also don't see how the richer folks think that they can ride the moral high horse when the high number of children born every year is not only a problem in terms of poverty but also a problem to the ecosystem.