Youngpo413:
to find husband no easy o,if she leaves,she may have to wait for another 10yrs.

At least you know u are alone on your own terms and not at someone else's mercy. Besides there's so much more to accomplish in life that you tie all your future to a marriage that isn't working.

Befitting:
Hey Nairalanders, your advice and kind words might help me to get through with this challenge I'm having.
I graduated from the university early this year, immediately after my graduation my alma mata embarked on a 5months strike. As a result of this, I moved to lagos to enroll in a fashion and design academy, with the hope that immediately after the strike, we'll get our result and go for NYSC. The going was good until I received my result with a spill. I had just a course to rewrite, I thought the school will wave it since it was just one course so I decided to work it out but that didn't work. This resulted with me been left out when some of my mates are already in camp now. The feeling is devastating.
Now, I'm back home to rewrite the course. My father is really angry with, he said I've brought shame upon him and myself and he'll never forgive me. According to him, he has never failed in his life so why would I? He's making it look as if he sent me to school and I just played with his money. I feel like a failure and disappointment. I don't know what to do...feel like running away cos this man is terrible!!

FVCK HIM! Don't ever make anyone make you feel bad! EVER!

dominique:
I've read more than once that a glass of red wine does the body a lot of good. Too bad most people don't drink moderately

I drink my wine very moderately, never more than a glass a day.

AprokoMan:

I'm not surprised

AprokoMan:

Well women are smarter at fucking around than men are. Unfortunately you think thats all women were created for. I pity you.

ekemini606:
I speak to all career women. This is all your fault. You no longer know your place in society. All you crave is to be equal with men_ as if its some kind of competition.

Your career now comes first before your children. What a shame!

This money is has been overrated for no reason. Many now believe that all I have to do is make money and send my child to a good private school. The school can't do it all. The family has a role to play in all of this.

I don't think you realise the situation we are in right now. The economy is so bad that BOTH parents must work. A friend pays rent, school fees , car bills,how will she do all that sitting at home? Her husband cannot provide for the family so she must sit at home and watch her kids die of hunger? This is 2015, the rules that applied ages ago no longer apply.

FYI women are equal to men in every way. We are even smarter.

Good for him

PAPIJAID:
Well as a married man, let me speak from my experience. It all depends on who your husband or wife is, for instance me and my wife are employees and we earn salaries but her's is a little bit higher and I as a person don't know how to keep money, honestly I don't because I have tried and failed on several occasions but she on her part is very thrifty and she can keep any amount of money for years, all you need to do is to ask her about the money you gave her to keep for you two years ago and she will bring it out exactly the way you gave it to her, for this reason immediately I get my salary I give everything to her after deductions as regards debts have been removed by the bank (she will even be the on to give me my monthly allowance) and she will add her's and keep, I can tell you this has greatly helped my family, if I should tell you what we have achieved using this method within the little years we get married you will marvel (mind you out of the four properties we have acquired, three has only my name as the owner). What I am saying is look before you leap, don't just marry anybody for marriage sake, marry someone who can add value to you. Whatever belongs to one belongs to the two of you. Jesus loves u.

I admire you and your wife. However I would advice that you change the name of the properties to both your names. Anything can happen.

I like that response. No body should steal your joy. Olosho man

01emek:
Its was really unfair and disheartened for her to refuse my proposal because of my height.

Pls nairalander is height now a problem in relationship and for the records,am 5:1.

5.1? As in 5 feet 1"? HAHAHAHA ! Abeg don't blame her, you are waaaaay to short. FYI height has always been an issue. Who wants a short man that she has to bend to kiss? 5.1"? Seriously?

Proudly team light skin mehn. We don't give a damn what they have to say about us. Who cares if we are flashy? Close your eyes so we don't blind you o! If you can't keep up pls stay one side.

kinibigdeal:
Pray and Fast

Best answer ever

Wackiest- P'shaaauun , Skuki

Coolest- Naeto C

zed7:


A tired excuse women give. Do you know the dedication and time put into working out? They also watch what they eat. Hw many surgeries has Omosexy done? Celebrities are dedicated because a fat, unattractive star would lose relevance.
We men see our women as our own celebrities but unfortunately they are too lazy most times. No motivation even when u talk to them.
Meanwhile i would rather look at an overweight guy than an overweight woman.

When you start having kids come and talk. How many times do u even have space to drink water talk more of exercise? I didn't have a moment to myself for years. Then you add work. Who get time to work out? Kardashians and co are jobless and have all the time in the world to work out. Besides they make money from their bodies so they must keep it tight. I'm sure a number of them do surgery sef.

Finally, everyones body can never be the same. Some lose weight without working out, some work out till they faint. If you don't want to look at overweight women, please close your eyes abeg

tellwisdom:


He must have discussed this with her, countless of times before coming here to share it with you guys...Don't you think?

Unfortunately there's no other solution than to talk and get her to see reason. You see you can only try to reason with an adult. What other solution can you think of?

tellwisdom:


Una no dey get tired of this "Talk to her" lines?? Gosh

Unfortunately marriage invloves a lot of talking. That's how you express yourselves and get to understand each other.

RiloKiley:

I have talked to her about it several times and have actually given up. It now looks like I am begging for thank yous and thats not the way it should be. I wouldnt have even bothered sharing this if not that she did this last one again.
Some part of me thinks she does it deliberately to "prevent my head from swelling" but i think she's overdoing it. I came from a family where appreciation is shown. I dont know if thats the way in other families.

Ok then. Next time DO NOT help her unless she specifically asks. Then tell her you didn't think she needed your help as God seems to sort things out for her. If she needs you, she needs to learn to ask for help and be appreciative when you help her.

ryut:
Pls advise,my wife of 6yrs in marriage still secretly communicate with her ex-boyfriend.She and i are from different tribe and when we married,during the first year of the marriage,i later discovered that the guy he normally speak with on phone,even at mid night call then is her ex-boyfriend,two of them speak the same language and i dont understand their language.I sat her down and advised her to cut off any communication with the man as i have done so with my own ex-girl,knowing quite well that it will cause more harm than good.Two of them still keep on secretly communicating,until i have to change her sim card.Though that may not deter them from communicating as i dont understand their language.Recently,she travelled and the time she came back,the chat i saw in her whatsapp chat log(not what i can mention here) shocked me-with that same ex-boyfriend which she saved his name with another thing,but i got to know that it is he tru their shocking chat even though the man just got married few months ago.When i confronted her,she first denied,until when i show her the evidence.Again,i cautioned her and delete the man number from her phone,suprisingly,she still calls this man,and the man calls her as well-she will quickly delete the call from call log,few days ago,i took her phone for repair,behold that same man was calling her when i was with the phone but i did not pick it.Two days ago,i noticed she called the man and that made me got annoyed when i confronted her with evidence,she said atimes d man may need advice from her since she got married before him.I told her so you are now a marriage counsellor and that i am sure that she cannot boldly call the man's wife and introduce herself as her hubby ex-girlfriend if truly her conscience is clear,and that this is getting out of hand,I was really annoyed.Pls advise,because i m getting fed up of everything.Thanks

OP if you like delete the number from now till Jesus come. If you like change her number every week. She's the one seeking him out. Send her back to her fathers house till she is ready for marriage. Chikena!

RiloKiley:
Greetings to all members in the family section. I have an issue I'd like to share with you all and I would like your honest input.
I have been "happily" married for the past eight years now and in the course of this marriage we have been through thick and thin and I have come to accept a number of things. One of these things is that my wife dosent appreciate me. She's kind and loving and all that and I'm grateful to have her. However I've noticed over the years that she's not very appreciative of my person. Let me give some examples.
There was a time her mother fell very sick. Her brothers didnt have money to cater for her and kind of left her to her fate. As soon as she told me I got her admited and sent my personal doctor to look her up. In a few days she was feeling much better and discharged from hospital. My wife never one day offered so much as a thank you till date. Even when the mother later came to see us and was thanking me my wife for some reason got up and walked out of the room. Now I realise the appreciation from her won't add to my account or anything but I felt a little show of appreciation would have been nice. She didnt so much as refer to the matter again and neither did Iathough i was perplexed.
There was another time she lost her job at the bank where she worked. She was at home for almost a year while we both ran from pillar to post looking for another job to get her busy(my salary can cater for the home but she doesnt like being idle) and eventually I got an old contact who directed me to a government official who asked me to bring her cv which i did. For another three months I followed the matter up, calling the man incessantly(she refused to call, saying she wasnt friends with the man, I was, even though I felt she ought to call to familiarise herself with him) and the interview was something else with a lot of lobbying and such. Finally she got the job. When she got the text message to come and collect her letter she called her mom immediately and they were both screaming over the phone in jubilation. I had to ask what happened and she said she had gotten the job. she started saying things "Thank God she got the job, The interview was tough but she was tougher, she wrote intelligently, etc. I pursed my lips and said nothing. When we eventually collected the letter and went to see her mom she repeated the same thing, she did not for one moment mention my involvement in the matter. It really hurt but I felt it would be immature to complain so I kept my peace.
Now I wanted to open a buisness for her to add as a side source of income. I've been cajoling her that she has a lot of spare time on her hands from the government job and she's very good in buying and selling which she agreed but said she didnt want to start a buisness as it would be too tedious. I talked to her about it for almost a month but she refused so I gave it up. You can force a horse to the stream but you cannot force it to drink. Only for her to come last week very excited and tell me she wanted to start a boutique shop,I should give her money. I was wondering what caused the turn around and she said a colleague talked to her at work that it was a lucrative buisness. When I asked "but its the same thing I've been telling you now, why didnt you think of it when I told you...she said She doesnt remember me telling her. When i pressed further she admitted i mentioned it to her but "you didnt say it seriously enough and my colleage has more experience.". This is me who ran a boutique shop for my mother years ago of which she is aware. I mentioned it to her and she shrugged it off.
Right now I just feel ...I dont know.As if she doesnt want to acknowledge anything I do for her. And it hurts me because I'm someone that likes helping people. Someone has advised that I stop seeking appreciation from her and ignore, that I shouldnt rely on her for my happiness and whatnot but I honestly dont know how to go about it. How do I look for appreciation from someone other than my wife? Why is she behaving this way? I keep feeling one day we will have a huge argument and she's going to say things like I have never done anything for her. And it hurts. Maybe its not supposed to but it does. I have a strong belief in love and loving my spouse wholy and completely and part of that involves giving and I know showing appreciation or at least acknowledgement shoudnt be a big deal but it is for me and she knows it. What do I do? How do I find joy in other things and ignore her behavoiur?

Why don't you talk to her about it? Let her see that she is taking your help for granted and that you don't like it.

shugga:
Hello house I need your views on this please.

There's a young man have been seeing, getting to 3months now. Recently we got talking deep and I realise he wants something serious, along the line I discover we have different views about certain issues, he tends to be the typical traditional man that just follow the norms of life without having a cogent reason for doing so, I mean all those click that follow the trend.

For instance we got talking about the kind of marriage ceremony to be considered, he told me he wants an elaborate wedding the kind the guests will go back and reminisce, that even if it means him borrowing to achieve that he doesn't mind.

This is someone working as a credit officer in a micro finance bank oh with slightly above 50k pay.
Me on the other hand would prefer a quiet wedding something like an indoor tm and a court/church wedding, he was like then I'm not his kinda woman.

I went ahead to explain to him the risk of having a marriage above your means but he wasn't ready to buy into such.
I personally want don't want an elaborate wedding cos through out my hard times have discovered that no one in this life cares for real, they only care when they have one thing or the order to gain from you even the immediate family isn't exempted.

When I was working friends and family flocked around and I was fooled to be believe they care not knowing it was cos I had what they wanted and I'm this type that I can't harden my heart towards people suffering, I can even sacrifice my last kobo for someone in need. These days my phone hardly rings and even those that say hi on whatsapp go religious and end the chat a moment they realise you're still jobless.

So of what gain should I entertain people that don't care if I breathe or not, even if my man has the means I will prefer he invest it or we use the money to enjoy life to the fullest.

I don't just like it when people do things just cos everyone else is doing them, I must have my reasons before doing a particular thing, that's me!!!

So dear Family is my reason for wanting a quiet wedding flimsy?

My dear, that guy is sooooo not the one for you. He's the kind that likes to live above his means. Run now!

guccidriver93k:
Now, I am a student, furthering my studies. And he is working, he has worked for sometime too.
Ok, so I have some money that I am saving to do something later next year, when I will be graduating. But my fear is that he doesn't sound like he will give me back this money. Two, I have a problem with him wearing a 93k shoe in this harsh economy knowing that the money can be saved and invested in something of worth. His choice at the end of the day sha.

Do you think I should buy it Opinions pls

Of course not. If we wants it he should pay the money into your account as you suggested.

My dear everyone has a choice on what they want out of life. I have kids cos I wanted to . My friend doesn't want to marry or have kids and thats her choice. I don't get to judge her.

Stop forcing everyone to fit into your idea of what ppl should be.

misspicy:

Seriously sis i dnt exchange words with any moniker that has famale on it...

If you were not too hasty in your judgements you would have seen my point.I doubt you are a regular NLder,you would have seen my views abt issues like this,i'd want you to go tru my posts and see how aggressively i campaign against male oppression of d female gender
Now if a woman has problems concieving that is another issue on its entirely

My bashing goes to women who completely follow the part of been a career woman and doesnt do anything about their family life,if a woman wants to be successful,have plenty money and be famous she should also strive to balance it by having a family,because life is not only abt making money or been successful in career,eg,omotola,mercy johnson and der likes.

And i repeat a woman that doesnt have issue concieving should birth kids while she can because that is her number one mandate on earth,if ur mama no born,how you for make money?

And what about ppl who can't have kids? Are their lives less impoprtant?

What about ppl that marry because of ppl like you and end up dead in the hands of abusive husbands or wives?

There is no hard and fast rule to life my dear, grow up. Dont let others tell you how life should be.

misspicy:

Clap for ursef u af spoken...if u like no born,live in ur father's house and acquire all d money in the world....ode

Na d kin cry wey ur type dey later cry be dis


www.lindaikeji..co.ke/2015/09/photos-moment-tyra-banks-broke-down.html?m=1

I pity you. You, a woman is saying a womans God given duty is to have kids?

You are just so dull. It's women like you that make men treat us as nothing but sex slaves

misspicy:
The lady said the truth buh without tact,she no think am first,besides no be her business
Buh ini edo needs to take it as an advice,its not all about money,a woman is never complete without fulfiling her God given mandate on earth.....'be fruitful and multiply













ALL THANKS TO THAT MOD WHO BANNED ME FOR FOUR DAYS FOR SPACEBOOKING,I GOT TIME TO BE PRODUCTIVE AT WORK,PLEASE BAN ME AGAIN NEXT TIME I BOOK SPACE

Game of Thrones. I love people's reaction to it. Besides I love GoT. Second phone, Happy by Pharrell Williams. Because I'm happy!

Rolly83:


@Daresh,was it at night or day light?

Broad daylight. Like 9am. I dont remember what the fabric was made of, been almost 10yrs but he wore shorts.

Dindondin:

you are daft

Look who's talking. Living under a rock for over 2 years open your mouth that someone is daft. Dumb @ss

Dindondin:

I vote a life that functions well.
it's you that should pack up your ass and get a life.
A coward like you that claims to know it all but runs from debate

Pray tell, what are we debating? That I didn't come online to tell you ATM collects cash? You know know road? Abi you just enter Lagos?

Dude get a job and a life and debate more sensible things.

Get a life retard

Dindondin:

If them born you well, challenge me to a debate.

You're backward, accept it.

Where do u live sef?

Dindondin:

you are myopic in thinking.
sharing info doesn't turn you to a media house.
Jump start your oblongata

Dindondin:

you asked me which decade I live?
and if you ain't naive, you ll know that online news is a fast means of reaching lots of people

Why in the world do I need to reach ppl? Am I CNN?

Dindondin:

Don't ask me or anyone that shares info like the one you quoted insulting question?
I lived in your decade.
If you v known about this since 2 years ago, it's a shame you v not shared it online

Where's the insult in my question? i asked where you've been since that you just know atms accept cash. Own up to your naivety its not a crime.

Some of us don't live online.