₦airaland Forum

Zeezy99:
They keep sending these soldiers on a suicide mission and yet punish them when they refuse? Help is on the way... In 6 weeks the clueless one will be out of office and justice will finally prevail

mumu

I don't think number 4 is correct becos magret my class monitor those day in secondary school nearly killed me with always writing my name in noise making list.in fact some times she will write victor times 4 when senior comes, I will receive times 4 punishment. Could this be likeness? Or hatred of the highest order.

This m6st be a customised kitchen

tosyne2much:
I Just looked back at the silly things my friends and I used to do at cross over service when men were boys and I decided to put this down

Ten Types of Youths That Will Attend Cross Over Service

1. The ones who can't remember when last they attended church service or have never attended church since the beginning of the year but will attend the cross over service

2. The ones who will keep going in and out of the church for no reason. ** wetin dem dey find sef ** ?

3. The ones who will go to church just to woo ladies. They will go into the church auditorium, check if pretty ladies are present and will start strategizing on how to strike up a convo immediately after the service

4. The ones who will go for Cross over service and start blowing knockouts outside the auditorium

5. The ones who will go and make their supplication to God. You will see them praying and sweating profusely as if that is their last day on earth

6. The ones who will keep receiving calls and typing new year messages as if their lives depend on it

7. The ones who will attend the cross-over service for no reason. During prayers, dey will not pray, during praise and worship, you will never see them dance. ** wetin una come find come church sef? **

8. The ones who will keep checking their wrist watches as if they want to add more time to their life span. They are more concerned about the time, therefore, they pay little or no attention to the short sermon

9. The ones who would run out of the church the moment it is 12am on the dot. They will not even return to share the grace

10. The ones who will keep disturbing you about the time. ** is it 12 O'clock yet ?**

Written by: Tosyne2much

this is the first time I ve complained over a post. Ops which kind yeye topic be this?

Olutola88:
It is a popular belief amongst women that a Lady needs to give a guy a tough time before she dances to his beats. They claim such delay tactics is healthy as it will make the guy cherish her more. They also claim that the guy would appreciate better something he sweats to get.

Sincerely speaking, this their ideology is absolute trash to me. I don't have that time to be chasing a lady for 12 months, after all she isn't my “dream”.

I get easily discouraged when it comes to convincing a lady to be mine, maybe because I don't feel a lady is doing me a favour by accepting to be mine. Come to think it, “Is she doing me any favour”? Don't even talk about sex cos it's very cheap and I can get it without dating. More so, she won't be doing me any good because she might even enjoy it more ( I always put my partner's satisfaction first).

I get sick and tired when a lady gives me unnecessary tough time. In fact, most of them call me “Egotistical”. They think I'm proud because my orientation is different from that of most guys they've met. They feel I'm cocky because they don't know my background, they have no idea about my journey so far.

I've had just 3 Girlfriends all my life. The first, I didn't woo her. The second gave me a YES after 24hours and the third which was the most tasking accepted to be mine after 4days of declaring interest. Guess what? I had the shortest relationship with the one that gave me the toughest time, it lasted just 2 months.

I've been single since December 2012 mainly because I don't have that strength to keep pushing and pushing. Most of them tell me that I'm spoilt and that I don't even know how to woo *lmao*. They claim I'm always too casual when wooing them, they say I don't show sign of seriousness, they conclude I always feel I shouldn't work too hard to get them. Do they want me to kill cow to show my seriousness? Nevertheless, I feel I've not just met that person that'll make me break the rules, that one person that'll make my heart do giz giz, that person that'll have my “mumu button” *lol*.

You know the funniest thing? The ones you don't wanna date are the ones always stalking and readily available. As a good guy, you don't wanna woo dem, use dem and dump them. So, nigga just keeps it at the Friends With Benefits level. When you get tired of the FWB life and seek love again, you'll meet one girl that'll be giving you unnecessary tough time and you'll be like... “WTF! Some girls are praying I upgrade their status from FWB to official Girlfriend and this one is here forming one rubbish! Go To Hell jooor” *LMAO*

My Questions:

1. How long did you wait before she gave you a YES

2. How long can you wait to get a YES?

3. Ladies, wetin be una problem? Is giving a guy a tough time a guarantee he will treat you right?

4. Ladies, why must we chase you people like we chase money before you say YES? I think the love thing should be mutual na? Must you stress the hell outta our lives?

u no get sence

I no know say they fit take person collect loan I for don carry one of my friends go take like 72k

nairalife2013:
Dis kind muscle man no fit defend himself against assaualt from a fellow man. He just sat there admiring his once-smooth skin and probably whinning like a little puppy coming back home from a lost battle! Am damn!! My two year old girl who will soon receive a tots'black belt can jackie chan dis dude!!! Well, sorry. Thank God tho d other guy didnt yank ya neck off. Next time be more careful and never try to take d law into ya own hands.

tell am sorry u no see the mechanic senior am

Prexxy1:
Around xmas time,we had a lot of visitors,,so i told my mum,i wl sleep in my brothers room,just to create space,my mum was like "do u want to commit abomination"

Personally,i dnt see anything bad in it,,so let hear ur views

u don't have to sleep in ur brother's room cos anything can happen see ur beauty. If i see you I would marry u at once.

sucreblazing:
wetin my eyes see my mouth no fit talk, but my mind dey tell me say e be like say hin dey check the weight of the boobi



*modified *



second front page within 24hours .....oluwa lo sure ju !!


God bless the federal republic of Nigeria and God bless the people that liked my comment + your vote is your power please vote wisely.

vote for change and for a better Nigeria !!!

it is too heavy the guy dey help her pack her

richardjemedafe1:
I have a girl friend we stay in Uyo but
different university. and we never had sex. She just
graduated this month. I have travel to see her once and
I mistakenly saw her nude pictures she snap (only pant
and bra) and some with boys (pant and bra) and she
told me that was her birthday. Her mum knows me.
She borrowed 6k from me that she wants to use it to
sort, that her mum(lecturer) won't give her money to
sort. That she will refund it. She posted a pix on
whatssap and I comented thus; ''the pix is pretty n
glittering who is reponsible''. She became angry. We
cudnt chat nor call again till she came back this xmas. I
told her mum that I will be visiting them for xmas and I
called her to inform her, and she said I shouldn't come
if not she will pour me water unless am coming to give
her money, I was so angry. on saturday I told her we
should see so that we can discuss and its not about the
money she owed me, and that whether she will come 2
my house or we meet in restaurant or her house and
she replied that she won't be able to go anywhere, I
now asked her to refund my money and she says I
should never call her again, that I dashed her the
money, which she lied. Please what tricks should I do
to get back my money since she never pick my call
again? And I have the bank teller

put her in prayer there is nothing God cannot do. Something like happened to me when I was19, the only girl I loveed then, one senior
man came from color=#006600][/color]collect the babe becos he has a car. All I did was to go down on my kneel and preyed for his car to spoil and God did it for me. The only thing is that, I still couldn't get the girl. .

Mrsfaithhh:
Guy:babe u knw I love U.
Babe;I knw honey.
Guy;I knw I can't giv u anytin . But I lov u.
Babe:tomorrw is my brtday
Guy: wow happy brtday in adv babe. U knw I'm broke wuld hav taken u out.
Babe:
So wat does a babe gain here?

security

Na all the pastor in Nigeria u mention so o. Ok which come remain nah?

Abeg Tonto na musician?

Mprex:
So the guy asked the girl out not because he loves her but because he wants to "gain" from her?


Disabusing the mindset of this generation will be one hell of a job

why will I guy like a girl if there will be no sex? U look at from this angle, I will stress my self toss u, maybe u played had to get. I wil, out of the pocket money my dad give me that I'm supposed to manage in school with, I will press my self and give her some. Maybe I'm working with plenty of money I will give some money, I will also spent my time calling her and even take time to comport myself before her. Infact many things to sacrifice and one of the only thing she can sacrify she would no to it. Ok u tell me what should I expect to get from the such relationship.

lalasticlala:
Now begs to eat, calls for justice

BY JOB OSAZUWA AND CHIZOBA IKENWA

When Emmanuel Mbilla was enlisted into the Nigeri­an Police Force 31 years ago, he might have dreamt of serving the country meritoriously and gloriously before handing over the baton to the next generation. Such dream has now been shattered by one ugly encounter with a naval officer.

Just four years for the long serving of­ficer to say goodbye to serving his country in uniform, what seems a tragedy struck on February 22 which abruptly cut short his long anticipated exit from the force. The singular incident had steadily sunk hole into his pocket, leaving him to now beg before he eats.

The victim’s second wife, Patience Mbilla, who witnessed the incident, told Saturday Sun that it all started when the naval officer, Enejor, drove recklessly to hit the pavement of her shop with his ve­hicle.

It has been nine months since the As­sistant Superintendent of Police (ASP) has been suffering after being allegedly attacked on the eye by the naval rating, identified as Warrant Officer Unaji Ene­jor on February 22 in the Kirikiri area of Lagos State.

Saturday Sun learnt that the 50-year-old victim had suffered glaucoma on his left eye before the incident, and a punch from his attacker on his right eye dealt a big blow to his overall sight.

All efforts made by Mbilla to regain his failing sight proved abortive. He told Saturday Sun that he had visited many hospitals in Lagos in a quest for a cure for his battered eye.

Presently, the policeman, who was previously doing virtually everything on his own, including driving his car, has now turned vegetable, relying on his two wives for help.

In her narration, the second wife said: “My husband and I were in my shop, when we suddenly heard a loud noise like a crash just outside my shop. We rushed out, only to find out that the pavement at my shop was hit by a vehicle. My hus­band told the driver of the vehicle to find a solution to what he had done, but the driver quickly identified himself as a na­val officer and told us to get out, boasting that we could not do nothing. My husband also identified himself as a police officer.

“The man wanted to escape, but my husband refused him, only for the na­val officer to forcefully hit my husband in the eye with the car key. My husband fell to the floor, screaming for help. At that point, the naval officer ran away but unfortunately for him, his car got stuck in a gutter. It was the sympathizers that were running after him that were able to stop him from escaping. Two other na­val men immediately came and wanted to help their colleague escape but the crowd overwhelmed them, and the assailant was eventually taken to the Kirikiri Police Division. Later, the case was transferred to Panti, Yaba, where he was released on bail.”

Saturday Sun further gathered that an investigative panel was set up to look into the incident by the naval command. But Mrs Mbilla accused the Navy of hiding the suspect.

“The police have written letters to the Navy. They sent two officers from the Navy to enquire about the incident. I told them what I knew about the matter and they promised to return to meet my hus­band, but we have not seen them since then. I believe they are hiding the naval officer from us. We demand justice,” she stated.

Speaking on the challenges they have been facing in the aftermath of the inci­dent, she said that life had been tough for them as their financial well has run dry and they now run from pillar to post to fend for the family.

“Since the incident, it has not been easy for me and my family. We have spent all we have on treatment; going for one test after other in different hospitals and eye check centres. My husband can’t do anything anymore as I have to be with him 24 hours to take care of his needs. We have spent over a million naira and I have sold almost all the valuables we have.

“He always feels pain and headache. We still buy drugs weekly. We want the Navy to produce the officer that attacked my husband so that he can share in our burden. Most importantly, we want justice to take its course but without further de­lay”, she lamented.

She also pleaded with well meaning Nigerians, authorities including the Lagos State government and NGOs to come to their aid financially and otherwise.

The victim, who hails from Ohafia Lo­cal Government Area in Abia State, is the only surviving child of his parents, with two wives and six children under his roof. Until his blindness, he was the breadwin­ner of his family.

Before he was rendered blind, the re­tirement plan, it was gathered, of the po­liceman who was a United Nations Peace Keeping ambassador was to establish a security outfit.

http://sunnewsonline.com/new/?p=97336

the Navy guy no try at all at all he for blind both eyes cos police does more.

FrancisTony:
This is a counter thread to all those threads tha are bashing women who are seeking for a better life; therefore, labelling them a gold digger.

Caveat- I'm male before you "Nairaland guys" devour me. I only came as the saviour of female folks.

1) You don't get to worry about how bright tomorrow would be unlike getting married to a poor man who keeps whining.

2) Everybody from all works of life will respect you if your husband is rich, especially policemen, street-urchins etc who respect rich women.

3) All your wants and needs would be satisfied without a remnant of it- You don't get constant nagging from your husband.

4) Your Children will get to live a fufilled life and attend the best school in your location- Paying school would be least in you worries.

5) Most broke guys are aggresive and won't hestitate to beat a woman anytime she does something- you know that a man who is hungry man, is an angry man.

6) You won't be insulted by your family members & friends who is going to see you as liabilities or people that you might visit for aid in the time of need.

7) Your husband won't label you as a liability- He has to spend the money because he got it and ready to spend.

You don't need to worry more on where to spend your vacations, as it's already prepared by your husband.

9) You children gets to acquire best treatment and sleep in a comfortable nice house.

10) You get to give birth to cute and healthy kids- Sometimes, poverty is the main cause of given birth to deform kids.

Now, Ladies go for the best and never relent.

u are right that's why we are really working hard to meet with this demands. But the only problem is that by when we get all this thing, you would ve all been old school.

kestolove95:
u've said it ur self Mr gej..."if d people u want to serv says no u leav"so pls gej leav..we don't want u again.

mumu the last time I checked u no be people

Even Aba not bad like this?

aristocrazzy:
Must she visit you everytime.
Get ur axs up and go visit her.

he won't because the action is or can only be done in his place. After much he wants the girl to pay her own money home without even knowing if she has the money.

EroticAngelina:
yeah it looks nice on her. doubt it'll look nice on me.

if na mini skit I'm sure it will look nice on u.

Is hes still our coach?

harrysterol:
Una jst d view no comments I go stop the research o

who send you?

OlamiB:
Please what do I do to reduce it, I am a shy person and I don't feel comfortable when guys stare too much. It would have been better if they were just staring at me but no! Its my butt
I went to church today in long skirt and some brothers were still staring, the stupid people even had the gut to tell me I have big ukwu
I don't wear tight dress or gown just because I don't want it to be noticed, but I am fed up now how do I reduce it?

Thanks

picture plssssssss

PerfumeRepublik:
The same thing Wey people Wey dey london dey find...

is it not better to be stressed in London than nonsense Angola

Wisepac:
Jonathan, The Best In Nigeria During HisTerm As
President:
1. Petrol from N65 to N97 - in most other
places over N120
2. Kerosene from 50 naira to 120 and above
i.e (unofficial price).
3. Garri from N150 to N260 per measure
4. Sugar/flour/beans/ all from N180 to N350
per measure
5. Electricity charge from N1,250 to N4000
per month and yet no light
6. Scarcity of money but abundantly
available for groups campaigning for TAN
etc
7. Killings from few individuals to whole
communities being wiped out
8. Police/military roadblocks from 1 per
40km to 2 per 3km
9. Crude oil illegal bunkering from 10,000
barrels to 100,000 barrels stolen per day
10. Industrial strikes by many organisations
11. Sack of few workers to thousands of
workers
12. WASSCE from 40% failure to over 70%
failure
13. Trust, love and unity among citizens
from much to zero
14. Stealing in billions of Naira to billions of
DOLLARS or TRILLIONS of naira
15. Budget implementation from 40% to less
than 20% Per year
16. Roads from potholes to huge craters
and cut-offs
17. Economy from worse to greatest in
Africa on paper, but the masses from poor
to poorest
18. Politicians defect from one party to the
other in an unusual fashion and soldiers also
defect to other countries
19. Transport fares on both air and road
networks have shot the roof
20. Bribe takings from only police to soldiers
inclusive
21. ATM charges from zero to N65 per
transaction
22. New English phrase called 'Tactical
Manoeuvre' when soldiers are deliberately
dispatched with low grade weapons to be
killed by a well armed "Boko Haram"
23. Bribery scandal
24. Police pension scam
25. Oduahgate
26. Bart Nnaji NEPA scandal
27. Allison jet scanda
28. Oritsejafor $10 million gun scandal
29. Subsidy scam of N2.6 trillion
30. Immigration deaths scandal
31. Missing $20 billion from NNPC
32. Handlin boko haram with kid gloves
33. Election delegate bribe
34. Sheriff/Ihejirika case, etc.
35. Increase in taxes and austerity
36. 16 is greater than 19 in democracy
37. 7 Ekiti legislators out of 26 impeached the
speaker
38. IGP usurping CJN's duties and deciding
that Tambuwal no longer speaker
39. Army are conceding territories to Boko
Haram
40. Locking out House of Reps members
and teargassing them.
41. Suspected mastermind of Nyanya bomb
attack where no fewer than 100 killed discharged
and acquitted. To go and sin no more.
42. 200 Chibok girls are still in captivity of boko
haram.
43. National confab gulped billion of dollars and
went down the drain with no result
GEJ undermines our Army & strengthen
militants. Our military doesn't have the
equipment to protect us. Militants are
purchasing warships. What an irony

foool

Tellmeurmind:
Please I need your advice. I'm a married man with kids, and I'm also involved in an extra -marital relationship with a lady in my office.

She is an early 30s. I'm so much involved with her to the extent that I cannot sleep without seeing her in a day. We have both known that we can’t marry each other but that doesn't stop us from always being together.

Any slightest quarrel with her always affects my family at home. She is praying for a Husband and she always tell me about any man who comes her way but because of my selfishness and impure ambitions, I always condemn them.

I don’t always want to see her with any man or hear that a man is calling her. With all these, I still have a strong mind that I'm blocking her from settling down with her Mr Right. I always feel like letting her go but I find it difficult.

Please, what do I do to let her go?

when start did u seek our advise?

Ezedon:
I ve red this over and over, plz give us something new

u should also bring new things don't always wait.

eleojo23:
Successful marriages don't just happen, they are built by deliberate actions.
In marriage, as in any other endeavor, we cannot afford to underestimate the importance of “little things” to overall success.
Because they are simple, the “little things” can be easily overlooked amidst the clamor of more pressing concerns.

Many marriages get into trouble because spouses ignore the little details, the day-by-day thoughtfulness that strengthens their relationship as well as the “little foxes” of neglect, discontent, and unresolved issues that eat away at the “vineyard” of their happiness.

Though this thread seems to focus on married people, those who are still single and intending couples will also find it helpful.

The content of this write up is an excerpt from Dr. Myles's Munroe's book on marriage. Dr Munroe discussed this issue in such a simple way that I had to lift it with little or no alteration to the original words used by him.
It is a bit lengthy but take your time to read it. Issues like this cannot just be summarized. They need to be dealt with thoroughly to drive the point home. If you already know some of these things, there is no harm in going over it one more time.

Let's begin...

1. Rebuke but Don’t Criticize
One of the most dangerous of the “little foxes” that must not be left to run loose in the marital “vineyard” is criticism. Nothing shuts down communication and disrupts the harmony of a relationship faster than harsh, sniping, negative comments. No one profits from criticism—neither the critic nor the person being criticized, or anyone else who may be within earshot. Constant criticism destroys a person’s spirit. It breeds hurt, resentment, defensiveness, and even hatred. Criticism discourages openness and honesty, without which no relationship can remain healthy. By its very nature criticism is destructive because it focuses on finding fault with the intention of hurting rather than of finding a solution. People who are critical all the time usually have unmet needs or unresolved issues in their own lives, and these problems reveal themselves in the form of a critical spirit.
Every relationship at times faces interpersonal conflicts that must be dealt with for the good of everyone involved. Part of effective communication is establishing an environment in which problems can be resolved in a healthy manner. Hurtful criticism is never the answer. Rather, in such situations a rebuke may be in order.

Criticism and rebuke are not the same thing. A rebuke differs from criticism in at least two important ways: the spirit from which it comes and the purpose for which it is given. Criticism arises from a wounded and self-centered spirit that seeks to wound in return. It is not interested in either the welfare of the person being criticized or in finding a constructive solution to the problem. A rebuke, on the other hand, comes from a loving and compassionate spirit that not only recognizes a problem but also seeks a fair and equitable solution with a heartfelt desire for the good of the other person.
In short, a rebuke is motivated by love, whereas criticism is not. A rebuke focuses on the solution while criticism harps on the problem. A rebuke seeks to correct while criticism only complains.

Watch out for the “little fox” of criticism that can nibble away at your relationship. Develop the discipline of thinking before speaking. Whenever a problem arises or a conflict flares up and you feel the urge to criticize, ask yourself if it is a legitimate problem for which rebuke and correction are in order, or only a personal gripe. Check your motivation: Are you acting out of love or out of anger?
Being willing and able to give correction is one side; being willing to receive correction is the other. Openness to correction is one of the most important elements of growth. People who are unwilling to receive correction will never grow. They will always be immature.

2. Don’t Get Too Familiar
Another “little fox” to watch out for is the “fox” of familiarity. One of the greatest dangers to a marriage is for the husband and wife to become too familiar with each other. This is not the same as knowing each other.

Spouses should know each other better and more intimately than they know anyone else in the world. A husband and wife should be each other’s best friend.
By familiarity I mean a comfortable complacency that causes a husband and wife to start taking each other for granted.

Familiarity reveals itself in at least three ways. First, it breeds ignorance. Couples feel so familiar with each other that they begin to ignore each other in lots of little ways that they may not even be aware of.
Second, familiarity breeds assumptions. A husband and wife begin to assume that each knows what the other is thinking. The husband assumes not only that his wife knows what he is thinking but also that he knows what she is thinking. The wife makes the same assumptions.
Third, familiarity breeds presumption. A wife will make a presumption regarding what her husband will say or do without even asking him first. A husband will make the same mistake with regard to his wife. If these three continue long enough the end result will be that as expressed in the old proverb, “Familiarity breeds contempt.”

Here’s a practical example of how this happens. Before marriage, when a couple is courting, they constantly tell each other how they feel. They don’t assume anything. They pay attention to every little detail, every nuance of voice, every gesture and facial expression. They never presume to second-guess each other. They talk sweet things to each other on the phone for three hours and, meeting in person an hour later, spend two more hours saying more of the same. They compliment each other, give each other gifts, and spend every available moment together.
This constant attention to each other is good and necessary to building a strong relationship because it produces in each person a deep sense of security. They feel secure in each other’s love and affection so that even when they are apart they still bask in the warmth of the knowledge that someone loves and cares about them. The more often we are told that we are loved, the more secure we feel.

For some reason, things begin to change after a couple gets married. It usually does not happen right away. Gradually the husband and wife start to assume things about each other. The husband stops saying to his wife, “I love you,” as often as he once did. He assumes, “She knows I love her. I don’t need to tell her all the time.” This may not even be a conscious thought. They stop going out to dinner or on other dates. They stop giving “just because I love you” gifts or cards or flowers to each other. They have become comfortable together, and this comfort breeds a familiarity that can cause them to slowly drift apart without even realizing it.

When a married couple becomes too familiar with each other, a lot of the adventurous spontaneity goes out of their marriage. Marriage should be stable and strong so that both partners feel secure, but within that environment there should always be room for adventure. One excellent way to keep a marriage alive and vital and exciting is for the husband and wife both to be spontaneous at times—to do something unexpected. It may be something big, like a weekend away just the two of them, or something small and simple, like a candlelight dinner or a bouquet of flowers “just because.” The key is to avoid familiarity and predictability by never taking each other for granted. Among other things, this means developing the practice of regularly expressing appreciation for each other.

3. Express Honest Appreciation
Learning to appreciate people is one of the most effective ways to create an environment for open communication, as well as one of the most important nutrients for building healthy relationships. Appreciation involves being aware of what others do for us, letting them know that we recognize it, and thanking them for it. It also means praising someone for his or her accomplishments with sincere happiness at his or her success. It is very easy to be critical or to become jealous over another’s achievements or attention. Most of us have to work at being appreciative because it goes against our selfish human nature.

One important thing that expressing honest appreciation does for us is
to keep us mindful of our dependence upon each other. None of us ever achieves success or happiness by ourselves. There are people all along our path of life who help us on our way, and often it is easy to ignore or overlook their contribution. Nowhere is this truer than in marriage. Humanly speaking, a husband’s greatest asset for success and happiness is his wife, and a wife’s, her husband. They should be each other’s greatest supporter, promoter, and encourager. No matter what happens in other circles, a couple’s home should always be a place where they can find consistent love, appreciation, and affirmation.

Spouses who maintain a regular practice of expressing their love and appreciation to each other, even during good times when it is easy to take these things for granted, will discover that this deep sense of security will sustain them through bad times as well. Knowing that we are loved and appreciated by someone helps put in perspective the rest of life with all of its ups and downs.

Expressing honest appreciation regularly is so important to marital health that we cannot afford to leave it strictly to our emotions. Sometimes we don’t feel like being appreciative. We may be tired or sick or angry or preoccupied. We must develop the habit of doing it anyway, based not on emotions but on knowledge. Emotions might say, “I don’t feel like it,” or “Don’t bother me right now,” whereas knowledge would say, “He needs to be affirmed right now,” or “She needs me to reassure her that everything is all right.”

Men generally have more of a problem with this than women do. For some reason, a lot of men have the idea that expressing their feelings openly and frequently to their wives is somehow unmasculine and a sign of weakness.
On the contrary, there is nothing unmanly about a husband saying often to his wife, “Honey, I love you.” A man who does this is displaying strength, not weakness. It takes more strength for a man to make himself vulnerable and expose his tender side than it does to put up a false “macho” façade that says, “I’m tough; I don’t need to say that kind of stuff.”
That’s not acting tough; that’s acting silly because not even God takes that stance with us, and He is a lot bigger and a lot smarter than we are.
Every day in many ways God tells us and shows us that He loves us. He does not leave it to chance. He knows we need to be reassured of it all the time.

Husbands and wives need to get into the habit of expressing their love and appreciation for each other on a daily basis. Living under the same roof and sharing the same bed are no proof of love. Just ask any of the thousands of affection-starved men and women who endure unhappy marriages day after day.
Love is fed by love, not time. We need to get so used to expressing love and appreciation for each other that we feel uncomfortable whenever we don’t do it.
Honest love and appreciation are the lifeblood of a happy marriage. Don’t take them for granted.

Any happily married couple will be quick to agree that their happiness is due in large part to simple daily thoughtfulness—little attentions that they pay to each other on an ongoing basis. These can take many forms. Compliments are always in order, whether referring to a well-cooked meal, a promotion at work, a fetching new hairstyle, a completed painting or poem, or whatever it might be. Honest gratitude sincerely expressed is always a winner.
What reasonable person could reject a heartfelt “thank you”? Unfortunately, because it is so easy for married couples to slip into the rut of taking each other for granted, compliments and thank-you‘s are often in short supply and overlooked in many households. Paying little attentions will help keep romance and the spirit of courtship alive in your relationship, even after many years of marriage.

4. Don’t Ever Assume Love
Love needs to be expressed regularly and often; it should never be assumed. Husband, never assume that your wife knows that you love her; tell her! Even if you told her yesterday, tell her again, today. She needs to hear it every day. Wife, don’t assume that your husband knows that you love him; tell him! Even though he may never come right out and say it, he needs that reassurance from you. No matter how tough and strong he may appear on the outside, he still needs you to tell him that you love him. We humans have a built-in need to be affirmed in this on a daily basis. Where love is concerned, there is no room for assumption.

We should never assume that our spouses know that we love them. Love may indeed “spring eternal,” but our expression of it needs to be refreshed every day. We need to say it to our loved ones, and we need to hear them say it to us. Once, or even once in a while, is not enough.

Here is an example.
Suppose a husband bought his wife a nice new car as an expression of his love for her. She is so excited and overjoyed with it, and he is pleased to be able to provide it. A few days later she asks, “Honey, do you love me?” A little surprised at her question, he answers, “I bought you that car, didn’t I?”
Several months later she asks again, “Honey, do you love me?” Again he replies, “I bought you that car, didn’t I?” A year goes by, then another, and another, and it is always the same thing. Finally, 15 years later, the wife asks, “Honey, do you love me?” “I bought you that car, didn’t I?”

Doesn’t that sound ridiculous? Yet, this is not too far from the truth with many marriages. Some people go weeks, months, and even years with no tangible expression of love from their spouses, either verbal or otherwise. In our minds, yesterday’s act of love does not necessarily carry over to today. We all need daily reassurance.

Although verbal expression accounts for only 7 percent of what we communicate when we interact with one another, it is still one of the most important elements for feeding and nurturing love, especially for women.
Men thrive on what they see, women thrive on what they hear, and both thrive on what they feel. Words reinforce actions, and women need to hear words of love, affection, and appreciation from their husbands.
Most men don’t spend enough time simply talking to their wives.
Dr. Munroe writes: Over the years I have counseled hundreds of couples who were on the verge of divorce over this very issue. I could not begin to count the number of times I have had a conversation with the husband that runs something like this:
“Do you talk to your wife?”
“Well, she knows I love her. I don’t have to talk to her and tell her that. After all, I buy her rings and other nice things.”
“I didn’t ask you what you bought her. Do you talk to her?”
“She knows I love her.”
“You’re making an assumption.”
“Look, I buy food for her and the kids, and…”
“I didn’t ask you that. Do you talk to her?”
“Well, I bought her flowers on Mother’s Day. I’m sure she knows I love her because of that.”
“You’re assuming again, and you’re also presuming that your gifts equal your love, but that’s not true.”

Giving things is no proof of our love. We must give ourselves first. Then we must verbalize our love. We must make our words match our actions. If we do not communicate our love verbally, we can end up confusing the difference between the thing and the person. We must learn to appreciate each other, communicate with each other, and talk to each other. Talking is the strongest way to attach meaning to our actions. We must be careful never to assume anything in our relationships, especially love.

5. Always Show Courtesy
Above all, always be courteous. Everyone deserves to be shown basic human kindness and dignity because we are all created in the image of God. Spouses should extend more courtesy to each other than they do to anyone else, yet courtesy often is one of the first things to fall into neglect in a marriage once a couple has become “familiar” with each other.
Courtesy works both ways. Wives should be just as courteous toward their husbands as they desire and expect their husbands to be toward them.
Husband, Always treat her as if you were still courting her. After all, why would the things that won her heart in the first place not still be appropriate to keep her heart? In every situation, both public and private, show her the utmost respect. She deserves nothing less, and you will lift her in esteem before the world, making it clear to everyone that she is more important to you than anyone else.
Wives, don’t be too proud or too “liberated” to allow your husband to extend such simple courtesies to you. Otherwise you will destroy his ability and opportunity to bless you. God created the male to find his fulfillment in blessing and giving of himself to the female. Don’t deny him the chance to fulfill himself by fulfilling you.

Always be courteous toward your husband, respecting him in speech and in action, especially in public. This is not a demeaning deference as a servant to a master, but the esteem of one equal partner toward the other. Men especially need to be esteemed in the eyes of their colleagues and peers, and no one can do that better than their wives. Take advantage of every opportunity to support him and lift him up and encourage him.
Whenever a husband and wife are together in public, there should never be any doubt in anyone’s mind that the two of them share a relationship characterized by mutual love, esteem, and respect.


These little things are the building blocks for the big things.

You can read this piece many times and even attend marriage seminars but it will still make no difference if you don't deliberately begin to practice these things. As earlier stated, successful (marriage) relationships don't just happen, they are built.

Wishing you all the best in your relationships.


Excerpts were taken from:
The purpose and power of love and marriage by Dr Myles Munroe.

e don finshed? U for paste more as u no know say na time person go take read am.

Keeping to instruction

hatelove:
Dear nairaland family

My heart is broken, i so much hate life and my hubby. Guess my hubby knows i am very angry hence his refusal to talk to me.

I have not seen him since i learnt his marriage is on saturday, his family has been arriving our home, at first his elder sister then an older uncle and some other relation, i became curious to find out whats up if someone had died but to my greatest surprisec it was my husband that is getting married.

My husband has not arrived home since yesterday they started coming.
my heart is broken, my soul is weak. ive called my parents that im done with the marriage i will be coming home. my mum cried on phone on hearing the news, im confused, my family is confused, all i feel for my husband right now is hate, i can strangle him or even poison him with trhe amount of hate i feel right now.

Our pastor called he didnt pick up.

Even though we have heen married for ten years with three beautiful kids.

dear hubby whereever you are right now, i pray for Gods purnishment on you
may you never know peace with your new wife
may your pocket go dry, by that way you will get to suffer with your miserable mistress
i wish you all the bad things of life

To the mistress
as far you have destroy my home, that is how God will destroy your home be destroyed too.

My heart is broken, i so much hate life and my hubby. Guess my hubby knows i am very angry hence his refusal to talk to me.

I have not seen him since i learnt his marriage is on saturday, his family has been arriving our home, at first his elder sister then an older uncle and some other relation, i became curious to find out whats up if someone had died but to my greatest surprisec it was my husband that is getting married.

My husband has not arrived home since yesterday they started coming.
my heart is broken, my soul is weak. ive called my parents that im done with the marriage i will be coming home. my mum cried on phone on hearing the news, im confused, my family is confused, all i feel for my husband right now is hate, i can strangle him or even poison him with trhe amount of hate i feel right now.

Our pastor called he didnt pick up.

Even though we have heen married for ten years with three beautiful kids.

dear hubby whereever you are right now, i pray for Gods purnishment on you
may you never know peace with your new wife
may your pocket go dry, by that way you will get to suffer with your miserable mistress
i wish you all the bad things of life

To the mistress
as far you have destroy my home, that is how God will destroy your home.

sleepless night for me, my husband wedding, my husband family asking me to be patient nothing has changed apart from me having a helpmate, me helpmate? TO MY HUSBAND I HATE YOU.

for ten years u two are married with three children and he decides to marry again. U must ve been doing something he did not like and u verefused to change.example see the corse u are placing on him

Mcquine:
this should be in front page

it's already on front page or what front page are u talking about?

I just finished one is it bad?