₦airaland Forum

Well one thing I know that the worst mistakes people make is thinking they can change this person, but the truth is that you cannot change anybody. Every human being carries there own baggage and demons. So people should just discover the baggage the other partner carries and to know whether he/she can live with it or not.

Very enlightening article. One thing I am learning is that man's existence is very deep. Our biggest undoing is fear, worries as a result of the state of our mind. Enlightenment and insight is the only thing that will free us from every form every form of fear, bondage and slavery.

Wyttcat:
You missed it! Ibos believe that women own and run households, so they are okay with ibo women marrying Yoruba men because the Yoruba homes will now be for their ibo sisters but can't allow Yoruba women to come and run ibo households. Hope you get it now. I wish Yoruba can fight for this woman but unfortunately she's on her own. This useless people know that Yoruba don't fight for their own, reason they are bold about it. I'm just one person but will do my best to make sure no one I know and have influence on will marry an ibo, it has become a taboo for any Yoruba close to me to marry ibo. Yoruba need to boycott anything Paul and Jude and their wives businesses. We need to start taking care of our people. I have a cousin who married ibo when he served in the east, I've not met her but believe me, she's already in a pot of soup for this, can't wait to turn the family against her, my pound of flesh.

If have been reading this story and all the tribal issue, but I want to ask you. How old are you? You are really sounding like a kid. Hating on another person because of where he is from is very childish, it will not change anything. Tribalism is a very bad thing. I am Igbo, but I don't judge people from where they come from. And many of my people are like that. You can still continue with your hate, it will not do you any good. Simple.


Moreover what I see from this psqure saga is very complex. Personally I think Peter is the weakest link among his brothers. He is a highly emotional person, and his brothers know him very well. Looks more like he has been riding on their back more. Therefore they have been trying to bully him. Maybe lola his wife encourages him to stand up to them. So that is where the complete dislike the her.


If I was Paul and Jude, they should just let Peter be, free him from the contract like he wants. Let Paul reinvent himself, infact that is what Paul should do, after all Micheal Jackson separated from Jackson 5, reinvented himself and went on to sell off the wall album and thriller the highest selling album ever with over 100million copies sold.

They should just free Peter, let him do his thing, reinvent themselves and get better. It may be a blessing for them.

0m0nnakoda:
They were trucks not cars and accidents did not happen "all of a sudden" that kind of hogwash only happens in Nolllywood. Why were they not insured? Even if it happened all of a sudden he would have been compensated.
The starting point is to ask him to show the written accounts of his business.
He talked about selling a building and I am guessing that as the trucks were generating money he started the building(s) without setting money aside, as he should, for insurance and depreciation. In short financial ignorance was the problem.
Even a country with trullions of naira must HAVE A BUDGET

I have been reading your posts. I believe science is good and has helped humanity. But there are realms higher than science.

See I ha seen things in this life. Any man that is just a mere natural man, when the storms of Life beats that individual, he or she is finished. Money, connections can never save you. I know a very wealthy man, worth 100s of Billions in Ikoyi, when cancer struck, his money and th best overseas medical doctors couldn't save him. Another Woman I know, she was diagnosed with cancer, every other of the people she was diagnosed with cancer with all have died, but this woman not only got healed, but is sound today because she keyed in an believed in the healing power of God.

I know another man who had a terrible sickness that required a machine to bring out all the blood in his body pass it through a machine and take a into the body again. The American Doctors gave the man only 1percent chance of surviving, but his wife an family stood upon God's word that he will be delivered, whole an healed. So he underwent the procedure, within that period another 11 persons underwent the Same procedure, all of them died. Only him survived, recovered, he was as thin as bonga fish, but after full recovery, this ha put on flesh, very healthy, still alive up till today.

I am so sorry for people that only trust on science an hand work of mere men, but don't believe in th power of the Living God. They are just chaff and when the storms of life hit them they don't last.

You were castigating Africans saying we are backward, this a that. But you are far from the truth. The problem we have here is that the worst of us are the one in charge of things.
We have the calibre of people that can go even ahead of the white man. We have some of the best sound brains, we have some of the best cultures and way of life, marriage still has value in this our clime, Africa has 60percent of fertile farmland in the world, we are th continent most blessed with abundance of natural resources, our birthrate is OK, we a better of than the rest very soon th era of the blackman in the development will Emerge like China emerged.

Brother you married wrongly. Your wife has very strong foundational issue. You need serious deliverance.

I laugh at some people that say this is superstitious. Black Africa has so many dark forces we are battling here. Things are very much deeper than people think. If you are powerless, you will be Pepper soup for all these dark forces.

In addition there is this Igbo adage that says nwoke nua nwanyi amalu akala akia. Meaning until a man marries a wife you will know his destiny. I know men that married who were reached but marriage brought blessings to them. That is why people must pray very well before marriage

Customer80:
From my observation. their wahala started when peter took a solo endorsement, peter is more outgoing and marketable while paul does the music both writing and production wise, so peter now makes money alone through the production of paul music without paul getting from the money, paul only get money from his business which peter also has, but paul anger is the his money comes from psquare shows which they share among the three (paul, peter and jude) his anger to me is on the endorsements peters gets which to him supposed to be shared between them knowing fully well that he is the brain behind their fame due to his musical talent.

Another is that they feel strange in peters actions which they think the wife is influencing through diff means, there is also this story of don't marry her she's going to destabilize the family by their late mom

Another thing is the lady is marrying peter alone, one man doesn't marry a woman alone in my part of Igbo land, you marry the hubby and the family, from what i see the lady seem to be less concern about the larger family,she just want to build her immediate family alone which is the hubby is somehow supporting

I am getting the full drift, though I had previous bit knowledge of the fight. Paul has always been the foundation and fibre of the group. He was the talented one. For Equity's sake, they also should have partaken from Peters endorsement, maybe Peters wife was now influencing him, not sure.

Like you said in our place one man doesn't just marry his wife solely, na community dey marry wife, and that is our culture. And whenever your Brothers don't like your wife, e Don be for you, because it will even affect the third, fourth generation even when you are dead. I have seen so many cases like that even in my immediate family. My Dad's eldest Brother that died 1999, he was in his 70s when he died. The wife died last year, can you imagine the woman's first son did not attend her mothers burial, alu, the entire village was shocked. The woman was very troublesome, our family said that my uncle was warned about marrying her. She scattered and put discord among her own biological children.

It taught me one very important lesson, the Bible always warned about marrying a virtuous woman, if you marry a bad woman, the harm she does will still be smelling even after you have left this world. That is why men must look well before they leap. There are other cases I have seen like those ones.

Mind you I am not saying that Peter married a bad woman, not at all, but there is no smoke without fire, and whatever fued that your seeing among this guys will touch the next subsequent generations, it will outlast them. That's why people must be very careful. Marriage has lasting consequences, so look well before you leap.

Congrats Chief Elizade.

Easy man this is what one experiences on our journey in Life. I know you truly loved the lady and now this happened. Nigger this is life or welcome to life.

If it was me, I will forgive her, if she is remorseful. Yes I said so. Humans are full of shit, we all make mistakes. If she is remorseful, forgive her, unless the other guy has has confused her.

Well the one you have in your village is your lot on the earth. This is just like my Dad, built 15 bedroom mansion in the village with several sitting rooms, and the funny thing is that we are only 2 males almost all my Sisters are Married, and My Brother lives oversea. I only enjoy the place during 2 weeks Xmas holidays.

Toks2008:
Igbos and yorubas are much more closer than Igbos to Igbos. ..don't know why but this is very true...

I have more igbo friends than yoruba friends.

Ya there is much truth in what you say. In most of my business dealings before, I always have this special relationship with Yoruba folks. In fact the present project I am handling now my partners are still Yorubas.
Irrespective of what we see on nairaland(mind you most of those comments are from very young folks that have not yet understood life) the yorubas and Igbos get along very well, never been any fracas BTW the two tribes before, there are so many intermarriage now BTW them. That is why we must put away all these tribal hatred and have much brotherly love.

The Governor has spoken well. I still stand for peace. War has never been a good thing. They must find the best strategy to curb this issue

princeeze1:
I am forced to respond to this thread, I work in a private firm, got married 2 yes ago on a 120k per month sal. Company restructured and slashed sal to 65k for me, mind you, those considered expendable lost their jobs. My wife, a student I am training, currently have a 1,year old son. Believe me we are not hungry.

How do we cope: a careful breakdown.
FOOD... We buy what we can consume every month end on this basis.
Rice-2 painter=#3600
Beans-1 painter=#1800
Garri-2panter=#1600
Yams. =#2000
Egg crate=#800
Red oil, big eva can =#900
G oil, same size. =#800
Ingredients, maggi, pepper, salt, onions etc=#1000
Total=#12500. Gas #2000 actually #1800 for 5kg bringing total to #14500

My son now eats adult food along golden morn
Golden morn 2 big pack=#1500
Milk...123 peak for kids 2=#1800
Usual drugs for children, bonabebe, paracetamol, cold drugs etc =#1500
Total=#4800

Actual cooking
We cook once in a month and stock in d freezer, all we need do everyday is boil rice and make EBA. Or rather cook yam porridge or yam n egg.
To cook soup, egusi and ogbon, Egusi 12cups is #1200, my wife also buys ogbono 1500,, tomato fruit and canned and fresh pepper for stew #1500.
Meat to cook all 3=#6000, other things she may buy like vegetables n kpomo etc#1000, total =#11200

Other bills
CTL cable TV #3200
Light =#1000
Waste mgt=500
Fuel for gen, 1k per WK=4000
My recharge n data=3000
Wify recharge n data=2000, I call more lol
Her hair and cream, I don't know her she partitions it is #4000
Total=#17700

Grand total is #48200, So I simply give her 50k monthly to pay for everything at the end of every month. And yes unless you are blind, you can see we are well covered, mind you she and not me drew up our new spending pattern, what a good wife should be able to do.

I save a mandatory 15000k every month, which is #180k per annum, I live in a 2 bedroom flat of 150k, with finance falling down, I simply rented out d guest room for 70k, call me greedy, mind you my guest room has no access to my living room and master room, I only share kitchen, now I only have to pay 80k per annum.
.I still have change.

I make bold to say we live very comfortably. Am I making plans to up my finances again YES. I only made this break down in support of op, from his breakdown, he may not live to even my now manageable standard, but he can, because he has focus.

Lastly we have a good ride, but mostly used socially and for church, I don't fuel or maintain my car from salary, occasional once in a while free cash maybe from office runs does that, everyone who works must have that loose free office change from one or two racket.

Moral.....
LIFE IS ABOUT VISION, WHOEVER CANNOT MAKE ANYTHING OUT OF 35K WILL MAKE NOTHING OUT OF 200K, BECAUSE THE HIGHER YOU GO, THE BIGGER YOUR TASTE. I CUT DOWN MY TASTE, WE HAD A PAID HOUSE MAID AND A LAUNDRY GUY TOO, COMBINE SALARY OF 25K, MY WIFE DOES THAT NOW, WE USED TO PUT ON GEN EVERY NIGHT THERE IS NO LIGHT, NOW UNLESS, THERE IS CONSECUTIVE OUTAGE, DUE TO FOOD IN D FRIDGE, NO NEED AND YES WE DO HAVE NEPA LIGHT AT LEAST 10 HOURS EVERYDAY, I USED TO DRIVE TO GO AND BUY ORDINARY AKARA, NO MORE, I USED TO BE AN OMELORA, NO MORE NOW.

IF YOU LACK FOCUS, YOUR EARNING POWER WILL STILL BE MEANINGLESS.

Nice one!! You know over time I have learnt a lot in this life, I have lost millions, lost almost everything I had and started life afresh. But when I had those millions, my God I was so wasteful with money. What I earn now monthly is very very small, but the funny thing is I am achieving more with the meagre money I make now than when I had my millions.

I began educating myself on financial management. Many in this nation have very poor financial management knowledge.

Sheikh Mohamed ruler of dubai made one statement in his book 'my vision' : it is not the amount you make, but how you use the one you make.

Also I recommend this two books by Dr Stanley Millionaires next door and Millionaire Mind. The book was a study done on millionaires in America. two things I got from that book is that most millionaires in America live a very frugal lifestyle, they accumulated wealth over time, they watched their expenses, they never lived above their means, and over decades they have accumulated fortunes. Another important finding from that book was that choice of spouse was very important to the wealth they accumulated.

The days we are in many no longer subscribe to marriage because the creator and originator of marriage was God. But many when going into marriage neglect God who created the institution and as not surprising many marriages hit the rocks.

To succeed in marriage seek God, get to know God. Until God opens your eyes and gives you revelation of what marriage is meant to be, you will never know.

Intact living/cohabiting with your fellow human being can be a horrible affair, but because marriage transcends that, it teaches you patience, not being selfish, caring and genuinely showing concern towards your partner. Marriage is not a child's play, but if you truly understand its meaning and do it rightly, you will definitely reap the rewards and benefits. It will be very enjoyable for you.

There are those who are having wonderful marriages despite all the terrible things we are hearing today, because they worked on themselves and were better partners to their spouses thereby yielding good fruit.

A lovely picture of a very wonderful, beautiful family and you people has turned it into a thread of hate.

Those saying the woman is not beautiful are either young and also very foolish. Most of you young people think you will remain young forever, not knowing one day you will get very old.

That lovely woman has carried two babies and the third one is on the way, and you are here talking trash. Moreover they look a very happy and peaceful family, lovely beautiful children what else can a man ask for from God. Having a happy and peaceful home is the greatest blessing God can give a man. There are many rich, good looking husbands and wives but with no happiness, very miserable.

BedLam:
A subsidiary in South Africa doesnt mean it's a Suth African bank. Did you even read what you posted ? The parent company ( the owners of the subsidiary ? Is English. Now you should ask yourself if you are okay.

You too shallow now to read my last line. Did I tell you South Africa began with Mandela? Go and read!

Stop spreading ignorance here. Standard Bank, Stanbic bank are South African Banks. Standard Bank is the biggest Bank in African continent. It is an African Bank totally.

Your claiming that it was the UK that started it, yes UK might have but over time it has become fully owned by the country of residence. There are companies like that around the world started by UK during colonial times, especially in British colonies. Like in Australia there were a lot of companies started by UK but today are today completely Australian Companies, like Rio Tinto, Bhp, then another example I know a very big conglomerate in Malaysia started by the British called Sime Darby, today it is a total Malaysian Company. Then in Nigeria Royal Niger Company started by the UK later named UAC when Nigeria took it over or Barclays Bank started by UK which today is First Bank.

achi4u:
Election will hold but how many people are willing to come out and vote?

Ipob may declare that day another 'sit at home' just to bring in more confusion to the uninformed people.

#just thinking...

Election will hold. Do you know the calibre of people coming out for Governor: Andy Uba APC, Ifeanyi Uba PDP, Osita Chidoka UPP, Willie APGA. I have been around elections before in my state, these men I mentioned are crowd pullers. They have their henchmen, they are very daring.

Even if many sit at home, then it will be even a walkover for them, that is what they are praying for. There is this adage na obo adiro nma bu uru ndi nze meaning when there is chaos in the land, the titled men will take advantage of it.

papaejima1:
And Aguleri forms what percentage of anambra population again?

That is where you failed. They have the highest voting population. That was the maths Peter Obi used to install Willie as Governor. During that election, I am from Idemilli axis(Ngiges side). I thought that
Our area coupled with Nnewi, Ezinifte/ Aguata axis had the highest voting population. But it was discovered that Willies zone has the highest voting population in Anambra, an the highest land mass in Anambara.

MXrap:
Do they even know that the greatest Igbo warriors are the Aguleri warriors. They think Aguleri warriors are not preparing for them. They should stay away from Anambra.

Don't mind them. They should not dare Aguleri people oo, upon say as we other Anambarians strong reach, never you dare Aguleri Men. I remember Aguleri/Umuleri war of the 90s.

I want my state Anambara to move forward. I support peace for my state. #Proudly nwafor Idemilli, Abatete/Alor/Uke/Nnobi

fineboynl:
.. modern development and civic civilization is not a black culture and not part of blacks. until blacks admit this and tell themselves the truth. black all over the world lack everything it takes to build a develop nation. it's not part of them. a nation is not rich by mare natural resources but artificial resources and intelligence.


Black's can't developed their country not because they don't like to but because they don't have what it takes in their brain. its just God that made it so. the white shouldn't have bothered themselves with black people. they should have been left alone in the dark. i don't hate blacks but i love you guys not to tell you the Truth. you guys should have been left alone with your culture and heritage not forcing colonialism on your throat which your forefathers rejected but were defeated.

I don't believe that. It is just that our society allows the worst of us to be in charge, while the best live in obscurity and penury.

Moreover after the rise of China, the next big thing to happen in this our modern world will be the industrialisation of Africa. Mark it somewhere. Industrialisation of Africa will create a continent with wealth in Tens of Trillions of Dollars.

Afam4eva:
Evil people can live long while the good ones don't last as much. Who says evil doesn't pay.

That is why we deceive ourself. There is no one good not even one. The only one good is God. So let's cut that crap. What we all need is God's mercy and grace simple.

addictiv:
Firstly you have to understand that happiness comes from within, despite your predicament you have to find things to be thankful and grateful for...All is not lost.
I can understand your need for attention, but I will only give you to focus on what you can control and ignore what u can't control. You can't control his actions or decisions, but you have absolute control over your actions, decisions and attitude. I think u should focus on becoming your best self. Not just because you want him to retrace his steps but because u owe it to you. Maybe he comes back , maybe he doesn't, it doesn't mean you should stagnate your life and potentials waiting for attention and validation. You have to find a way to thrive ..

True Bro. The mistake many people make is that they look on somebody else to make them happy. But the truth is that nobody but you can make you happy but you.

And also many people get into marriage with this fairytale mentality, marriage is serious hard work and challenges just like life is not easy. With the right mindset, one can handle anything that comes their way.

Brokenangel2:
Do I make our home uncomfortable for him? No!!! How do I know? He kept telling me of how lucky he was to have a wife like me. He says I give him peace that most married men don't have. He sometimes tell me how his friends are amazed when they complain about their wives but he only has positive things to say about me. Can't you people just see? I don't know if there's anything I've done. I don't know where I've gone wrong!!! I'm dying!!! He is all I have. I made him believe he is all to me. Is he taking advantage of my fragile nature? Is he taking advantage of my kind nature? I don't know but God knows

My dear don't give up on prayer and trusting God. Your man has been corrupted by evil company. This is a big trial for you because you were prepared for marriage, you are an upright person and had principle so the negative forces in control of this our world has marked you out for attack and trial, but be strong this too will pass over.

Another thing is this, learn and develop a personal relationship with God. Husbands, wives can fail us, the only best friend you will have is God.

What you are going through is close to what happened in my life. One of the things I have realised about life is that when you are principled ,life sometimes comes against you with great storm, but you will see those unprincipled, life rearly never comes to them, but the only difference with those unprincipled ones there storms when it comes on them, they lose everything maybe even their life.

So my dear be strong, look deep within you, and you will find tremendous strength. Then I used to ask why me, I was sad, sorrowful, but God strengthened me.

And another thing many people need to begin to realise that marriage is not fairytale, marriage comes with so much challenges. People need to have that at the back of their minds. People that were very loving can just change at the snap of finger, nothing is guaranteed, that is the journey of life on the earth.

Sometimes I even begin to question this thing called love, but like on of the comments said we are humans and not perfect, therefore some love can go wrong.

But sometimes I feel one of the reason couples fall out of love is 'see finish', nothing interesting again. People need to work on themselves, to keep on stretching themselves and not being complacent. That way, the marriage will go from phase to phase. And honestly it takes a lot of work to make a marriage work out

marticeus:
It is really sad to be a Nigerian, this man Ben is 100 percent right, it is only a fool and a buffon will see the truth and ignore it. I hope and I have prayed not to see the calamity that is waiting for us if we failed to re structure. I see it repeating coming again the same calamity as it happened in the days of Noah and Sodom and Gommorah repeating itselves in Nigeria.

Honestly you are the only one that has made a sound comment. The man was saying the correct thing and pointing the way forward, instead most of the comments here are busy insulting him.

The man is very correct. If Nigeria doesn't get her act, I am very sorry for what will befall this nation.

Anyway for me I am not even waiting for any government, I am going on with my own diversification strategy. Planning ahead for the future of my business and Companies. Because based on what is on the ground, serious danger is ahead.

MissRaine69:
This where things go wrong for us. I have read and know of many a story of how a man has hustled a lot to help his woman/wife through school when things are said and done the couple have settled and have not looked back. Matters can't be forced of course but what off loyalty?

I recall a link that was sent to me about a 11 year old who was a very promising student but was married off due to poverty. Her mother in law & husband who were both illiterate trades and hustled to send her to school , she completed her medical training and once working she helped & supported her husband to go to school. He works in a bank she is a doctor.

Where would she be without him? You can't be ashamed of where you came from but we are notorious for doing this . If it's such a big thing for her its simple she shows her gratitude by returning all he spent on her. She was an investment it paid off so she can repay the loan. He moves on and so does she.

My dear we humans are the reason why our world is so messed up. Selfishness, selfish interest every where. I will keep on saying this, Love is the greatest thing on this earth. As far as I am concerned, 1 Corinthians 13 starting from verse 4 is one of the greatest truth out there. Love is patient, kind, not boastful, proud, not rude nor selfish........etc. Honestly if we humans begin to judge and way our actions with the qualities shown in this chapter w will have good relationships, good marriages, good homes, good children and good humans. But look around and see the reverse is the case, and that is why the world and humanity is so messed up.

IFNOTGOD:
if u know wat it means n d deception she may have used to collect d cash den u wudnt say so, in as much as i support u in saying d man shud move on but d word pay him back is fees is a no no for me, i did same for a girl, she wud say she wud marry me, from delta i came to lag on transfer n still helped her true sch, finally she graduated last yr n i sent her to learn a trade i borrowed d cash to do dat n on feb 2017 she ran away wit a guy she felt he had more cash n had to lie to friends about me so dey wudnt blame her n by March 2017 dey broke up, her friend called to say she was suffering n i sent her some money n she said she has repented n ready to go learn d work which she stopped half way, she begged to come visit n i allowed her n den i realised she fooled me again i got angry n beat her cos for d two yrs n 6 months i dated her i have always been abused by her, checked her fone saw d oda guy n oda guys pics n cudnt find mine n d pain was just too much i beat her n in july on my birthday seh refused to post my pics wit d excuse dat we are many she cant post only my own on her dp, n den revelations started coming out how she slept wit a guy she told me was just a friend, i forgave her n a week later she started again with d insult but den wat pained me most was dat she goes about telling d new toasters how am older dan her, where as i told her my age n asked her if she was ok
she said yes, now tell me fortune how much can she pay me back, d only thing u can tell me is work away.but its not easy cos two yrs n 6 months is not a joke not to talk of 12yrs

you know the reality is that life as we see it has ordained and brought you as a good gift to that your ex in form of true love but she by her actions rejected this wonderful offer that life brought her. Years to come she will look back with regret for all her misdeeds if she doesn't change.

And you will definitely get a woman 100times better than her, for sure and with all sincerity mark it somewhere.

It is very painful, but if I was the guy, I will just dust myself, pick myself up and move on. One big truth people don't realise about life, which I have come to realise is that whatever you sow you will reap. This is the truth and nothing but the truth, but many people out of ignorance overlook this fact, then when they begin to reap all the seeds they sowed, they will start running helter-skelter.

When you sow good things into people's life like in relationships and you get rewarded with evil, never be troubled because you will get the reward back. And most times the reward comes from a better mate than the one that did you bad. I am talking from experience. People may call you mumu or stupid, because most human beings are very selfish, let it never stop you from still sowing good things into people's life when next you have the opportunity.

That guy should move on, it will be painful, but he should never be discouraged because as long as there is day and night, he will get a very better Reward, far better than that lady.

Men you guys are making me to salivate. Honestly we get plenty types of soup in nija!! Wow!!

Sarah20A:
2 things involve, either the pregnancy does not belong to the man or the wife is barren

Not really the man may have a low sperm count but the lady is a younger woman meaning she is very fertile so the low sperm can easily impregnate her.

Because most times women that are beautiful don't come with much to the union except there beauty. And these silicon billionaires understand life very well, therefore going for values like good character and a cool headed woman which will ensure a stable marriage.

Those that saying all this....there is a tendency for cheating embedded in almost all men, the difference being ability to control themselves.

also a lot of men have no self control therefore cheat, but some hide it to their woman while some do it openly without remorse.

Self control for a man can be well improved in a man when there is deep understanding between the couples. But most importantly a man that had self control as a bachelor can never cheat on his wife because he has trained his body that way,except his wife gives him trouble thereby driving him into the arms of another woman but a man that never had self control as a bachelor with multiple sex partner has a very high probability of cheating when he is married. Moreover human beings are very deceptive so they can really hide a lot of stuffs and it is a very evil world we are living in.

Well my own addition:

If you are fortunate to have a good woman in your life value her, likewise if you are fortunate to have a good man value him. Why? Because there are just very few good women and men out there, so if you are fortunate to ha one in value them. Many are seeking and hunger for such people. So if you have one it is a rare privilege value and appreciate it well.