₦airaland Forum

@2Ballz, @heavenet, @timid101 my woman, a virgin, is having a hard time with me deflowering her. She anticipates the pain despite a lot of pre-intimacy and lube and this has been an issue for me. I have heard of prescription drugs like Tylenol and Xanax which could make her relaxed before the show but I also learned they could be addictive. From a medical standpoint what would you advice I do. Thanks.

@UyaiIncomparabl

everyone alive will pass through the Great Tribulation...you will have to choose between receiving the mark or dying a martyr!

@bigtimemugu, your moniker alone already shows that you will end up make a very dumb decision...and it may be a reflection of what you think of yourself! Nevertheless I would advice that you do not make a decision based on the sentiment of those who think you don't have guts. If you heed their advice and your expected 150k ceases after the first month, trust me na only you go dey chop the garri ohhh...none of the folks wey advice you go support you financially ohh! You either base your decision on faith or on evidence. If you are the man of facts, then get your facts about the new firm, inquire from other staff of the firm, learn about their business model and project their long term prospects. If the odds look good and you can earn that pay 150k for the next one year steadily then you can resign and move on to the next firm but have solid plans for business. If you are a man of faith, talk to your GOD, depending on who your GOD is, and ask about what the best decision. If you can hear from your GOD, then act on what you heard but if you cannot hear from GOD or your GOD is mute then revert to basing your decision on hard evidence...shikena!

Zeeknow3245:
I don't argue with people like you. If you claim you love the bible and Your LORD. Take this
Ephesians 5:21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Ephesians 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Ephesians 5:26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Ephesians 5:27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.,
Ephesians 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
Ephesians 5:29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
Ephesians 5:30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

If you like call me weak but I ain't no coward. So you are strong? I don't know ooo Men of nowadays ehn always excersising authority.

The bolded is a huge statement. If wives submit to their husbands in everything they will render their duty as a wife irrespective of their mood and this makes marital rape within marriage a faulty concept that cannot exist. The church is subject to Christ and is hence made to please Christ irrespective of the mood of the times. Hence whether in pleasure or in pain, the church must live to please Christ...the same with the wives, who are required to render their duty as a wife irrespective of their mood. Hence marital rape does not exist. However, a loving husband understands that with love comes mercy and with mercy comes empathy and hence would consider it unfair exacting his marital demands of a woman who may at the time lack the capacity to render it - nevertheless by law of the LORD GOD on marriage what is regarded as unfair is perfectly legal. We must also see this on the reverse side. If a man has set aside a specific plan on how to spend his money but his wife using persuasive means finds a way of coercing the man to go back on his plan and spending that money in a manner that pleases her, would we consider that legally wrong? No. It may be deemed unfair but it is not wrong because a man is not for himself but for his wife...marital rape is a non-existent concept!

Marital rape, if deemed an offense, will easily be extended to marital sexual harassment and this will make marriages even more unattractive. As far as I am concerned, if you take rape too seriously you should not be anywhere near a person of the opposite sex let alone being in a marriage. This will give one the freedom to express oneself without entertaining the possibility of getting raped...getting married and reporting your spouse of marital rape reeks of stupidity to me because if the punishment for rape were to be applied to marital rape then every such report would be tantamount to a divorce which could have been secured even before the martial rape happened...so instead of putting yourself at the risk of marital rape due to marriage why not divorce and remain divorced just to avoid the possibility of marital rape?

Antichristus:
From Irenaeus to John Hick and Richard Swinburne and, even of recent, William Lane Craig, all theodicies remained grossly unsuccessful. The question posed by the 3rd century Greek philosopher, Epicurus, culminating in what is known in philosophy as the inconsistent triad remains valid. If God is Omnibenevolent and Omnipotent (2 sides of a triad), why is there evil and suffering (the third side of a triad) in the world? The reality is there is no God. The idea of God is a human invention. The invented was then given attributes which at best are contradictory.

As intellectual as you may seem you did not refute the claims in the post you responded to. You merely stated another topic for debate. You can criticize my words from several angles. You could criticize the veracity of the Biblical claims (and you will have to handle the historians on this), you could attack the deductions I made (though I seem not to see a flaw in my logic) and you could attack the relevance of the answer to the problem at hand...you can do any of these instead of being diversionary.

DIVINEEVIDENCE:
In Genesis 2:24, the word to watch out for is 'wife', not 'cleave'.

For the fact that a man cleaves to 'his wife' and not another, it then goes to show that before cleaving can occur, requisite cultural or traditional requirements must have been fulfilled and the couple are now husband and wife, legally.

Cleaving is permitted only in marriage. Outside it, it's an error. Spiritually and culturally.

What is marriage then? Can you define marriage clearly?

Uyi168:
..
On ur behalf, Shame dey catch me.. Very pathetic sermon..

If every claim, theory and hypothesis were addressed in the manner you just did there won't be a science of anything...

Uyi168:
And God was watching

From the beginning...it was not in the place of GOD to stop evil instead it is in the place of man empowered by GOD to stop evil. Also it is not in the place of satan to unilaterally cause evil, but it is in the place of man to choose to do evil whilst being empowered by demons to do evil...both GOD and satan have one thing in common, which is that they both use the instrumentality of men to carry out their actions on earth. Every punishment of God is preceded by the voices of men calling for justice and vengeance. Sodom and Gomorrah fell because of the cries of humans (Genesis18:20-21). The Chaldeans, unseen dark forces of heaven and Sabeans who attacked the possession of Job did so on the inspiration and drive of satan (Job1:14-17). David incurred the wrath of GOD on the people as motivated by satan (I Chronicles21:1-7)...I can go on and on. Both masters, of light and darkness, have vowed not to interfere directly. GOD has enormous faith in humanity that they are capable of great good, will yield to the light and are worthy of being lifted to heights that angels cannot attain but satan on the other hand believes man is not worthy of the height GOD has elevated him to because mankind is just as vile and evil as satan and his angels are ...this game started from the garden and till today is still being played... Evil happens to innocent not because GOD allows it, but because there is a scarcity of men who are willing to yield to the light to fight the darkness and its many evils

Indeed the law of the LORD stipulates that intercourse must only happen among married couples. The question that needs to be answered is; what is marriage? When GOD brought Eve to Adam, Moses, who saw this revelation, stated the golden dictum that underlies marriage: therefore shall a man leave his mother and father and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh Genesis 2:24. The word to watch out for is cleave. The word has been used in the same context in such verses as: Deuteronomy 10:20, 11:22 and 13:4 and in essence it means to be to cling to, to be joined to and we know that in the case of an intimate relationship between a man and a woman this is reflected in sexual intercourse.

Many believe marriage starts at the point where they are joined by a priest or when a man pays his bride's dowry but this isn't true. These traditions did not happen between Adam and Eve yet their union was the first marriage to have happened. Their marriage was attested to by Adams statement: "this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man" Genesis2:23. Adam recognized the oneness he had with Eve by virtue of been taken out of Adam but in the case of all other men this oneness is reflected in the bond that exists between a man and a woman that brings both of them into a perfect synchronization.

Hence marriage commences when there is a mutual bonding or cleaving of souls between a man and woman in alignment with GOD's will and this bonding or cleaving reflects in the man making a proposal for a lifelong relationship and the woman accepts. At this point, a covenant is reached between the man and the woman. All the other traditions of the payment of a bride price, the blessings of parents, the witness of friends and family and the wedding ceremony and secondary activities built upon the covenant that started the union between the man and the woman.

Given this definition we can conclude that there are many who are wedded but not married and are married but not wedded. There are couples living together as husband and wife but they are just deceiving the world as they are just room mates living together in a single apartment. Also there are couples who have pledged their undying love and loyalty to themselves but are limited by the high cost of weddings!

We must realize that what many refer to as "sex before marriage" is actually "sex before wedding" and sex before wedding is wrong only when it occurs as a means of pleasure and not as a reflection of a bond between two people committed to each other for all times. The Bible itself makes provision for such an act. If a man happens upon a maiden that is not betrothed to any man and sleeps with her and this act is revealed, the man in question is required to pay 50 shekels of silver (the bride price obviously) and is made to be a husband to that lady for all times Exodus22:16; Deuteronomy22:28-29. Given this verdict, men are made to realize that the cost of desiring a woman not betrothed to anyone else woman is the life long commitment of marriage.

The rule hence is quite simple. If a man who has a mutual bond with a woman has intercourse with the same woman she is to be his wife and vice versa.

mrblessed:
This reply of hers must have immensely gladden your heart to warrant a tactless and gratuitous show of appreciation. I surmise you would become unconscious if she sends a pm to you. Una no dey try!

One day you will be six feet beneath the ground and you will know what it means not to be able to get a reply from anyone no matter how eloquent your speech is...

Brightgem:
What you are saying is different from what this post is about. You already approached the post with a wrong mindset, avoid saying what was not said here.

Self love and understanding of self and contentment in self is not selfishness...

Anyways without need for further explanation, neither does this need become a discuss that's an argument. We all judge what we read or how we view life from our own realities or the knowledge and experiences we are exposed to, these are yours, your own realities.

It's a key message for ladies to understand they need to stop running helter skelter in the name of societal standards. And for men to raise their daughters with the right mindset.

Societal standards? Well people like you are already setting societal standards. Your post is loaded with societal standards. Only that your standards seek to usurp the extant societal standards of our time. So logically your point lacks moral grounds. You cannot morally fight societal standards sculpted by the opinion of others by setting another set of societal standards founded on your opinion. If societal standards are the enemy then we should tear down all standards of society and resort to social anarchy! Lol.

Pardon me but I actually grab your point but I feel you should realise that people are at liberty to choose to be a rebel or a slave to the values of our society. For example, isn't it strange that despite all the teachings of clergymen and practitioners of various religions we still have a very corrupt society? We all have the opportunity to choose. Some people go through life without having a family. Saul of Tarsus, Kathryn Kuhlman etc are very good examples but for others it is a source of solace and no matter how you preach they just won't snap out of it.

As for fathers raising daughters...the question is how many fathers do we really have out there? And how many really know what the right mentality is? Who will be the judge of which mentality is right or wrong? There is a way that seems right but the end thereof is destruction. So what really is right? In my own opinion, living a life of faith guided by the ultimate standard of truth, the Spirit of God. This, to me, is what leads to the right mentality. Others may have their own standards but this is mine and I will teach my kids that...

Thanks for your reply!

Biglittlelois:
I do not understand how people will confidently misinterprete the Bible and say it as fact,


1) No where in the Bible does it say marriage is a ticket to heaven, rather, the Bible says that heaven is a personal race and every individual will give account of their deeds on earth, whether married or not married.

2) You must be delusional, the Bible(God) that said "love your neighbour as YOURSELF" didn't know what he is saying right?

3) The fact that you classify all ladies as one when it comes to bad behaviour, thereby ignoring the obvious truth when it comes to the concentration of females on home training, and ignoring men and their high handedness, entitlement mentality, says alot about you as a person.

I did not insult the OP and I wonder why you are insulting me in your reply. You can debunk my views without having to attack my person.

On your first point, I did not claim the bible says marriage is a ticket to heaven. I said as a matter of opinion that marriage could easily be a ticket to heaven and i founded my opinion on scripture. You do not necessarily have to agree with my deduction and you most certainly did not need to insult me to drive home your point.

On your second point, if you read your Bible you will know that the law to love our neighbor as we love ourself is an obsolete law. Jesus gave a new law and He said love your neighbor as I have loved you (John13:34). Loving others based on the parochial yardstick with which we love ourselves is flawed. Many love themselves enough to pierce themselves all over in the name of pop culture and I wonder if any same parent will want that for their kids. Self love is obsolete, outdated and in our modern times quite deadly.

On your third point, my apologies if it seemed I did so but that isn't the crux of the matter. My point centred on parents considering house chores training when modern tech can easily replace those chores. Training goes way beyond chores and I listed some core areas that should be part of the informal curriculum at the home level. I will not dare lump all ladies into the same group because my mom did a good job raising me and my woman is a breath of fresh air all day everyday.

@Biglittlelois I merely expressed my opinion, you don't have to malign me to express yours. Nevertheless I'm happy you found my post worthy of a reply. Thanks.

@Brightgem

On your moral codes depicted in your pictures;

1. Your marriage could easily be a ticket to heaven. The scriptures talk about iron sharpening iron and not being unequally yoked with unbelievers...these verses imply that a fault marriage could lead one to disaster and damnation or the bliss in heaven.

2. I hear love yourself, love yourself. Self-LOVE is just another term of self-ISHNESS. Self love is just the pursuit of your desires. Love is never with regards to oneself because by default we all do what we believe is best for ourselves. Love is always with respect to someone else or something else. This is why we can easily say God is love because He exists in a community of 3 persons. Hence the scriptures "the Father loves the son and hath given all things into his hands". Everytime the word love is used in scripture it is always in reference to someone else or something else. This self-love teaching is just another new age import into Christianity.

3. You claimed curfew is not only for ladies. Which sensible parent leaves any of his kids out in the dark after 6pm? I hear ladies claiming that home training focus mostly on females and by home training we mostly mean house chores, cooking etc...yet these ladies lack decorum, courtesy, discretion, tact and the capacity for critical thinking. The other day a very stup.id girl visited a boys hotel sorrounded by a high fence around 6am alone and with no security in sight. She was stupid.id but she could run, because when the randy boys chased after her her legs could carry her faster than the wind enough to help her escape the maniacs who would have raped her to death!

There are other factors explaining the rush of females for marriage other than the desire to have children before they hit menopause.

Some ladies in the low income strata also realize that marriage is an opportunity for them to be financially stable and lead a comfortable life. Mind you not all such ladies are lazy. Some of them leverage on this advantage to begin big players in other spheres of life depending on how cooperative the husband is.

Some ladies see marriage as a means to escape the ordinary and experience something new.

Some ladies are in a marriage just because they are fed with the notion that marriage must happen to every human.

Some ladies even marry with the hope of humiliating the unfortunate man who dares marry them.

So you see there are several factors driving the demand for marriage, some are significant and some are not but irrespective of the driver of demand there are constraints and one of them is that these ladies realise that with age comes stiffer competition for husbands. Although I am not armed with statistics but I can guess that the older the lady the slimmer are her prospects of landing a husband in her cohort who isn't an acquaintance from teenage.

As a prospective parent I would rather train my child, irrespective of gender, to be a solution and not a problem. Many ladies are not married today because they are an ocean of troubles. A true helper will be highly sought after because there isn't a shortage of men with a lot of troubles and challenges. Hence I can argue that a true wife will be married even before she hits 25 and at that age she need not worry about her biological clock.

You must also realise that ladies face a lot of risks getting pregnant after 35. This is a known fact among medical scientists.

Put these together and you can rationalise the rush for marriage by females but a virtuous woman, who can find, for her worth is far above rubies!

naijacutee:
If you want UK household stock - disinfectant wipes, cleaning supplies, biscuits, wine etc I can help. (Items are on ground in Lagos). Will send a PM.

I got your PM and I replied. I will keep in touch. Having access to goods from the UK is a huge plus. I will most certainly keep in touch. Thanks

Suppliers...wey una ohh

I am in the process of getting a shop in a prime location and I need to stock up. I would like to get:

1. The contact of suppliers of household items, groceries etc
2. Information on the nature of service delivery. Whether it is pay after delivery or pay before delivery.
3. The scope of delivery. Whether within Lagos or major states like Lagos, Abuja, Ibadan or nationwide

This could be of immense help to others who intend to open up super stores.

Where are the feminists? This is a common vice in our society...where older women commercialize the sexual drive of young ladies. Feminists should rise to the occasion and fight this...but where are they?

Jide mumu! Wetin be pride for dis kain time. Banker in Portharcourt, port wey hot pass anything...na to migrate to Lagos ohh! And if he is lucky Anita is a godly woman, wow, the result can hardly be imagined!