₦airaland Forum

This pictures are live from the camera men and journalists who where live at the 2010 world cup in South Africa. All the action took place in the match against Greece.

bunmioguns:

Those lines sounds familiar to you, no doubt.

anonymus11: People crack up whenever i write or speak so I have decided to try this here as i cant practice comedy as a profession. So how do you roll on this section? i have been on romance section for 3 months or there about it has been a pleasant experience. i hope i am welcome here and show me the ropes

You have to paste at least one joke in here daily for 21 days. And let none of the jokes be recycled, I mean NO COPY & PASTE, we've got enough xerox machines here already. After which the elders of this section will decide if you're qualified to be here or not.

SO you have to start or go back to romance section if that is where you belong.

Poor mentality, she must be going for a clown party hosted by NYSC.




@OP what is "Jejovah?"

Johnny: Nice jokes....keep them coming,pls dnt mind the haters!
That joke abt d blacksmith is a bomb....so d apprentice hit his boss‘ head with the harmmer?Oh my GOD!!

Thanks bro, I appreciate. May your days be elongated.

MIDGETS NIGHT OUT
Two midgets won the lottery, and decided to treat two prostitutes to a fancy dinner, and then take them back to a posh hotel for the night. The midgets got rooms next to each other, and got down to business. One of the midgets soon realised that whatever he did, he couldn't get aroused. The prostitute tried pre-intimacy, role playing, but nothing seemed to get him sexually excited. Meanwhile, in the next room, the sound "One... Two... There... AAAAHHHH!" could be heard repeatedly, all through the night.

The following morning, the midgets came downstairs for breakfast, and one said to the other, "My night was horrible! No matter what she did, I just couldn't get aroused. But by the sounds of it, you had a great night."
The other midget replied, "Are you joking? Mine was worse than yours. I couldn't even get on the bed!"

ok, then. I'll draw the map and get all the points on.

sutoboy: but how am i going to tell her....





re u happy about this?

oya help me

Ok brother, I can help you. But I want to know if you're about short term or long term biz. Then we'll move from there.

^it's ok brother, but what?

You can only grab the foundation of CORE Java programming in this period if you're good enough and have the time and circumstances to do so. But you may need at least a year to fully grasp core java, except you already have knowledge of C, C++. Even at that Advanced Java is way out of reach. I just hope you've not been getting marketing pulls from training centers like NIIT & APTECH. Seriously, they're the worst places you can go to if you really want to program except you have prior knowledge of this $hits.

However, all the best in your endeavour.

STILL ON FAMILY

A man goes on a 2-months business trip to Europe and leaves his cat with his brother. Three days before his return he calls his brother.
Man: So how is my cat doing?
Brother: He's Dead
Man: He's Dead! What do you mean He's Dead! I loved that cat. Couldn't you think of a nicer way to tell me! I'm leaving in 3 days. You could have thought of a nicer way to break the news me. You could have told me today that she got out of the house or something. Then when I call before I leave you could have told me, 'Well, we found her but she is up on the roof and we're having trouble getting her down'. Then when I call you from the airport you could have told me, 'The Fire Department was there and scared her off the roof and the cat died when it hit the ground.'
Brother: I'm sorry, you're right, that was insensitive I won't let it happen again.
Man: Alright, alright, forget about it. Anyway, how is Mom doing?
Brother: She's up on the roof and we're having trouble getting her down.

sutoboy: i love you die

could this crush be for real?

mcnepow: bunmioguns, tanxs for the write up but. . .

u could have sent it to general section

Bunmi pls learn from this comment. In fact religion / religious section is there as well, so? You give people room to make fun with what's not fun whenever you post this kinda thing here.

booqee: Ekeroyal i've noticed dat you like forming......

I don't understand the forming here. Why are you attacking me? What have I done to you? Or are am not giving in you the attention you deserve? Pls don't let me change my notion about you. Was just about saying sth really sweet about you before I saw this mess.

MOGUL.O:
I wonder ooooo... Help me ask ekerubber oo!

gentle man on the street, go get a life.

If it's not a joke why post it here?

coogar: theo walcott is a disgrace!]
what a dive.....

Are you listening to a radio or via the phone?

why was Theo not awarded a freekick??

Why are we always robbed?

the OX is finally in. Here we go!

Kay-Dee:
Gervinho, big-head, i hope you're here to score

I hope so too. I need the Ox in there. Let Rambo be taken out, his missles function once in a while. And today ain't his day at all.

Kay-Dee:
Wenger's love for Rambo is like an incurable disease.

You're so on point bro.

Kay-Dee:
there is no technical mistake, unless u want to mention the inclusion of Djourou which is understandable.

Goal 1 was due to Arteta's injury and possibly the second too if you trace it back well.

You're a true gunner. I would have opted for The 'OX' on the wing & Ben to a central role since Arteta couldn't continue. As regards Djourou, he's our best bet for now in that position. Song, Bac, Walcot have been messy in this first period. They need to step up.

no tension fellas, we're Arsenal. We've got the boys to turn things around.

But it's a shock to be down under 8 mins.

Suto's a good boy!

Pls prove me otherwise

GUNNERS FOREVER, EVEN THE ANGELS IN HEAVEN AND SATAN KNOWS THAT THE GUNNERS ARE THE BEST, unlike Barca whose other name is cheat. We produce world class players from scrap and sell them at world class prices to the less privileged, play world class football, are robbed in virtually all games and still never give-up, never relegated, never bankrupt, having the best fans world over. ALWAYS DOING OUR THING.

Deal with Wigan today and ambush the drunks.

GUNNERS ALL THE WAY!!

WAX JOB

(A bit lengthy, but try going through, you'd like it)
An American Navy serviceman is looking around Bangkok when he comes across a $ex shop that looks really inviting. On the board outside on special offer it reads "Wax Job - $10". His curiosity takes him into the shop and there stood in front of him is the most beautiful Thai lady he has ever seen. She beckons him forward "How I help you?"

"Im here for the Wax Job" He replied.
"Ok, come in, strip off naked and lay on this bed." He does as he is told, hands over his $10 and in the half light, he lays on the towel. In walks the girl and she then puts a towel over his head. "You lay down Mr Navy man, enjoy wax job." With that she picks up a piece of wood, about three inches wide, incredibly smooth and 12 inches long and places it under his joystick. Immediately, he is aroused and hard as a rock. His body arches a little as the Thai girl sings away in her own language. "You lay down Mr Navy man, enjoy wax job."

She then takes another piece of wood exactly the same size and shape and places it on top of his erect joystick. He moans in excitement.. "You lay down Mr Navy man, enjoy wax job. Lots of Americans pay top dollar for this - very very good."

She then takes a thin piece of silk and lifts up his joystick between the smooth wood and starts to wrap this around and around the wood before tying it in a single knot. By now the serviceman is harder than hard and ready to explode and his nails are digging into the bed. "You lay down Mr Navy man, enjoy wax job. Very very good."
Another length of silk follows and his joystick is now clasped gently between the two pieces of wood and he's moaning in excitement and can barely contain himself and his balls are tighter than coiled springs. "Why you call this a wax job?", he moans. "You lay down Mr Navy man, enjoy wax job. You find out soon".

She then takes a warm bottle of beautiful smelling oil and pours this onto the wood and his throbbing joystick in between this secured by the silk ties. The oil permeates all the areas he did not believe it could and the warm fluid slides between the wood and onto his joystick. "Now Mr Navy man, I let you know why we call this wax job" and she lays the wood down on his stomach as he moans under the towel. She then reaches under the bed and gets a huge baseball bat. She looks at Mr Navy man and with that, brings the bat down hard and incredibly fast right onto the top length of wood.
And with that, the wax shot out of his ears!!!!!!!!!!!!

"There you are" she says. "Get up and go home."

sutoboy: Here is the thread for us to define some names on nairalander according to their behavior on here........i will be the one to start and then you can add yours!!!

BIN.Gbagbo.......Particles used in making Coffin!!!

Vivly.....Beauty!

Add yours!

Sounds true from evidences on ground, what a pity!