₦airaland Forum

^Tere muh vich lan

Nasri----->Panchod

~vicky~:
thanks@ all





lol i cant do dat

Yea dear, don't mind the dork Mogul.OModulo. His visit to yaba left is long over due.

'I'm the Number 1 NL Joke Critic,Haterz come kiss inbetween my two thighs.'

Tautology

you need to take sticks for that

New Bin -->evict

*gives Vicky a hug & peck*

Your best jokes ever, looking forward to more of this.

SMH! Joblessness. Bin, pls stop associating me with Projan trojan & BH. Am a holy man & upright. Pls be a good citizen. Ok?

@OP, my simple advice to you is "go to some other section, this section has got more than enough of your type. You're neither funny or know how to make one even smile"
https://serve.mysmiley.net/sign/sign0003.gif

Question Tag

Teacher: Our topic for today is question tag..
Example 1- You have a bag, haven't you?

Example 2- He can't come, can he?

Now Who can make a sentence using question tag?
Johnson: we will chop yam today chopn't we?

Teacher: what?? This is terrible! Who can correct that sentence??

Mark: ma'am pls don't the yamhead!

The correct sentence is "we shall chop yam today, yamn't it?

Teacher:

EFULEFU1: mois that kind bobo wey get hairs for him chest, pointed nose, chocolate in colour, very short and yam-legged.
make i hia una o.

What is mois?

Are you sure you'd like a "very short and yam-legged" guy. By the way could you briefly explain in detail about this 'yam-legged' stuff, I wish to know.

DONkollione: Withh kpomo too! Lol ̶̲̥̅̊

Sure bro-->all you desire.

^^what's he speaking? https://serve.mysmiley.net/sign/sign0003.gif

DONkollione: Stop fronting mr royal! Its don the kollione speaking!

Nyc joke

gracias! Don, may there always be meat in your soup.

^^Thanks bin (hugs him and gives him a very good handshake) I can proudly say you're a good boy, your medication is working and that's because you're following the physicians instruction.

However, I am not gonna join Projan, I left NJPC not because Projan was better. But I needed to enjoy myself within my orbit and stay away from phucktArDs. Besides, if I consider joining Projan you'll lose your job as the president.

Last word: Look elsewhere, am gainfully employed and enjoy my job. https://serve.mysmiley.net/sign/sign0013.gif

Finally we mad it --->phew! Now we can look up to next season with confidence, am sure all the directors & managers @ Emirates have learned there lessons and must do the needful before the beginning of next season.

Anyways "VICTORIA CONCORDIA CRESCIT"

Thanks everyone who appreciated my joke, was away treating myself after that Gunners victory.

Anyways, that reminds me bIn pls go have your medications for Saturday throw Monday 'cos am sure you've not been taking those drugs. I can't continue wasting money on those drugs when you're don't want to be fine, or do you want to go back to the psychiatric hospital? It's only a call away.

@ATMC bIn's sick pls ignore him for now. Thank you.

mandsignal: www.nairaland.com/937012/baddest-joke-9ja-police#10817333

Poor boy, looking for customers? The next time you advertise your xeroxed joke in my thread again, I'd bandeal with you.

I obviously see this game as one for which we would make amends. I always had doubts of our ability to beat Norwich even though at home but today am optimistic we shall win in style. All the way to UCL next season Gunners!!

A minister concluded that his church was getting into serious financial troubles. Coincidentally, by chance, while checking the church storeroom, he discovered
several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed. So at the end of his sermon the following Sunday, he asked for three volunteers from the
congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church. DOn, BUnmi and bIn all raised their hands to volunteer for the task. The reverend knew that DOn and BUnmi earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some bibles but he had serious doubts about bIn. bIn was just a little local farmer, who had always tended to keep to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor little
bIn stuttered very badly. But, not wanting to discourage poor bIn, the reverend decided to let him try anyway. He sent the three of them away with the
back seat of their bicycles stacked with bibles and asked them to meet with him and report the results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.

Eager to find out how successful they were, the reverend immediately asked DOn, "Well, DOn, how did you make out selling our bibles last week?"

Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, DOn replied,
"Father, using my sales prowess, I was able to sell
20 bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf of
the church."

"Fine job, Don!" The reverend said, vigorously shaking
his hand. "You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church
is indebted to you."

Turning to BUnmi, he asked ! "And BUnmi, how many bibles did you manage to sell for the church last week?"

BUnmi, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently
replied, "Reverend, I am a professional salesman and was
happy to give the church the benefit of my sales expertise.
Last week I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the church, and
here's $280 I collected."

The reverend responded, "That's absolutely splendid, BUnmi.
You are truly a professional salesman and the church is also
indebted to you."

Apprehensively, the reverend turned to sluggish bIn gBagbo and said, "And bIn, did you manage to sell any bibles last week?"

bIn silently offered the reverend a large envelope. The reverend opened it
and counted the contents. "What is this?"
the reverend exclaimed. "bIn, there's $3200 in here! Are
you suggesting that you sold 320 bibles for the church, door
to door, in just one week? bIn just nodded.

That's impossible!" both DOn and BUnmi said in unison. "We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many bibles as we could."

"Yes, this does seem unlikely," the reverend agreed. "I think
you'd better explain how you managed to accomplish this, bIn."

bIn shrugged. "I-I-I- re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know
f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure," he stammered. Impatiently, DOn
interrupted. "For crying out loud, bIn, just tell us what
you said to them when they answered the door!"

"A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was," bIn replied,
"W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy
th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible f-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks
---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me
t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read! it t-to
y-y-you?"


<<All the best this Sunday fellas, always watch out for #Super Sunday -only one SUnday in a mOntH knows iT>>

~vicky~:
lalalala ve jus added you


so where is d gift

Linux OS-->>You didn't see nobody

booqee: ^^ Hey! I dint see u on fb. Otokoto wey i see na group no be person. Shey u dey use us play ni?? shey u too dey use person dey play ni?? I no see anything like comdt eke royal on fb!

Am there & am gonna add you but let's enter a deal. Just that I can only add but can't be added.

Ajibel: Who next

Comdt Eke Royal

Catch me if u can.

ANybody WhO cAn locate me on fB gEts a gIfT!!

^^Sorry to hear, but no probs just send it across to me, I'd appreciate your kind gesture.

The Birth of Bin Gbagbo

Bin's father said to his wife after Bin was born "I dont mean to be rude but he doesnt look anything like me"
Mrs. Gbagbo lifted her skirt and said..."I don't mean to be rude either but this is a pu**y not a f*****g photocopier! "

Moral: The Viagramania is an age long tradition of Gbagbo's family. The madness Bin display in NL is only an application of it.

Two young men in UK saw a heavily pregnant woman enter and took a seat in a train. Suddenly the young men started laughing, the woman noticing she was the target simply switched to another seat but the laugh increased. Notwithstanding she moved again to another seat, then the laugh was unbearable. The woman called the Police and ensured the young men were arrested for abuse of her rights.

Now they were taken to the Police station and quizzed. They said "The first place she sat had a banner over her head "Heavy duty on board", the second place had a banner "The William's stick did the trick", the the last seat was having the banner "The Twin blades coming soon!".

At that the Police burst into laughter and let them go.

(DISC 10...THIS $HIT'S TOO BIG FOR ME )

ondo_boi: @ruqaya : o je fi @OP si le, omo a je okuta ma mu omi lasan ni.

@OP more pix, not funny dou

Ok, egboo mi. More pix 4 sure!

swtchicgurl: hahahahahahahaha

Switch! What's funny?

Ajibel: @ekeroyal,maybe I shuld borrow u my g/mama glasses...the title of dis section reads jokes and riddles,o can't find 'encyclopedia' in it
@swtchicgurl...kai dis ya laffter funny pass the joke,sorry d encyclopedia

Ok Ajibel, that'll be really nice of you. But what will she support herself with when am using the glasses?

^I know you're not abusing me, I got a few words but not the exact thing. So am ot uncomfortable at all.

Ruqaya: u're getting nervous?
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

Nervous? How? Pls briefly explain in detail. Thanks

@Ajibel, sorry I forgot to tell you thanks.

Ajibel: I thought I was going to find something creative but as always you've disappointed me @op like oda jokers
I dunno,this is neither a joke nor a riddle....arghhhhh...smh

You're very correct bro., it's actually an encyclopaedia -NL version. So if you don't find anything funny, try the other threads with jokes in them.

okie dokie, so how far have we gone? Huh? No fb ids posted yet? Urrrrgh!

Ok, even if I post mine nobody can find me. So somebody should post theirs & I'll retaliate accordingly.

^^ Hi Ajibel, that's true. You've been doing some undercover things I assume
Welcome to the normal life and hope you won't disappear again.

@Boo, write yours first, pls. Charity begins with a girl(they say)