₦airaland Forum

You are not a wasted being. Good a thing you have realised the adverse effect and the glaring consequences of gambling.

There's a satanic spirit behind gambling. Accept Jesus today and give your life to him and let Him give your life a new meaning. Thereafter pray God to disconnect you from every spirit of gambling. Ask God to terminate that habit and every other odd habit in your life.

merit1988:
ur right

Oya share your answers with us.

So OP, how did you meet him? What attracted you to him? What made you fall in love with him? If you can answer these questions then you closer to your answer.

Nice post. Very true for a naturally cultured lady.

DOMINGOPAPI:
I am well educated and a professional but i have been stagnant for years. I am homeless and my hope is dampened as the future is bleak. I have tried everything including being STRONG but not anymore. I have also become antisocial and I have since lost my ego. I am not proud of how far I have come over the years...

Indicating your specific professional trade or specialty would readers to advise and guide you. Subject experts would be able to tell you what you need to do to improve the status quo.

The story of David in 1 Samuel 30 should encourage you. Here David came back from a battle and arrived home to see that the enemy has come to take away his wives and children, plus that of his solders and all their property. And he cried and was distressed. Even his solders turned against him. But the Bible said David encouraged himself in the Lord. Then and there he asked God what to do. He asked God if he should pursue the enemy....... God said go ahead.
We were not told that David who was already drained from a battle, now distressed, went to eat to gain strength to pursue the enemy oh. Immediately God said go ahead, he right away went after the enemy. Question is where did David get that strength from?
So that is why you need to put up a positive attitude when faced with challenges, whilst trusting God. Infact I learnt a new definition of patience early this year. The person said it is the ability to put up a positive attitude in midst of challenges while waiting for a promise.
That said, you need to put yourself together. It is bad enough that our educational system does not teach us entrepreneurship or how to discover ourselves. That is largely responsible for the chaos we have at the moment. We “cram and pour it down to make 2.1 or 1st class” to get a job, but can’t think through to create value that can sell to generate wealth. Most of us are trapped in that web.
So OP, you must be willing to throw away pride, look inwardly, what you can do to solve a problem – washing cars for people in your neighborhood, collecting and disposing refuse, visiting construction sites to work etc Someone will be willing to give you money if you offer to solve a problem. With the little money you are able to get, start and develop your line of interest. Trust God, be diligent and dedicated, you will pull through. I will call you later.

OP, I have read the comments. See there's no point talking back at your mum or your husband. Since you're already doing a teaching job that fetches little, I suggest you continue with it, while you try applying to dinner either schools that pay higher.

I read where you said you have no skills. Look everyone of us have a skill that God has deposited inside of you and me. You need to sit down, pray and ask God to reveal to you. If you ask Him, He will reveal it to you. Usually it's something you can do effortlessly. It is only when you need to further polish it, you might need to go for training and even acquire certifications.

Yes, you may have read accounting, but that may not be your interest. That is why you need to discover your passion. It's the passion you grow up to create value, value that solves a problem. It's when that value solves a problem that people pays for it. For example, you love braids; how it makes a woman beautiful and you create variety of designs effortlessly, doing each sessions quickly. You can start from your house within your neighborhood and before you know it you're literally booked all through the week.

It could be accounting, then you can save. Yes save from a side hustle (skill). It may take time, maybe years but if you follow your passion, you will get there.

Whether your husband gives to you or not shouldn't even bother you. Still pray for him. Thank God he takes care of the home and your daughter. Continue to love him and respect him. Keep your home very clean, neat and orderly. Cut off from your friends that are mocking you. Like someone wrote, buy materials and see them beautifully. You can make simple but beautiful dresses for little money. It's for you to look simple, very neat and presentable.

If you do the above and with God in your side, you will surprise one day, just one day, your husband will ask, how he can assist you or ask what you need, without you asking.

Your matter dey simple. Give your husband the benefit of doubt, think inwardly for that talent in you, be a good wife and home maker, pray for your husband and commit your home and marriage to God in prayers always. Proverbs 14:1 says "Every wise woman buildeth her house; but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." So my dear be wise.

Interesting comments. IMO it's good you stay for about one year. This will enable both of you to enjoy yourselves, adjust to the reality of being married - living together and plan. Yes plan!

For those that want the babies sharp! sharp!! Remember that once the wife takes in, the man has just 9 months to plan for the baby: this includes saving for; antenatal expenses, baby items, baby delivery (including contingency for CS if it goes that way. Well a good hospital can give likely indications) etc.

So you see that if you do not plan very well and be prepared emotionally and mentally, you may be in for a bumpy ride and you will think it is village people when the expenses start pouring in torrents.

Many thanks OP for this piece. It has help sharpen my understanding of the behind the scene for the 1985 celebration when IBB arrived in a naval uniform. I see that you did not say if the celebration held in 1984, by which time Buhari was in power with Idiagbon a Brigadier as chief of staff supreme headquarters (the vice), IBB a maj.gen the chief of army staff and i think Mutala Nyako the naval chief. Note that Idiagbon as chief of staff supreme Hqs was a defacto number 2 with powers over the service chiefs a tradition that was in existence from previous military govts.

However, IBB changed all that when he appointed Ukiwe (a one star general) as chief of general staff as his vice but with no powers over the service chiefs. I guess he was afraid if his vice have such vast powers, he could be toppled.

Very shocked and heartbroken to hear of the passing away of Pastor Daramola. I used to enjoy how him and the wife took the Open Heavens Daily Devotional on RTM. I always looked forward to watching either him or the wife every morning by 5am. I think that was two years ago and they did pretty well while out there in Southern Africa.

May his soul rest in peace. I pray God to console and comfort the wife and rest of the family.

Laugh wan kill me with the kind of comments wey i dey read.

@marvelous000 your tuition no loss.

Sometime last year or so, a colleague who just resumed after wedding on stepping into our office was hailed by another colleague, extending his hand to shake him, saying "welcome to prison"! Everyone busted into laughter for a long time. Continuing, his colleague added "yes, na prison you just enter so" and the laugh continued. Months after when that occasion, I will just be laughing when I remember what the guy said. Maybe due to his own sad experience since he was married for just under 4 years before being separated from his wife.

The point I am trying to make is that marriage is a serious business. From the man's perspective, it's not what he would just jump into. At 26, I don't think he wants to go into marriage, notwithstanding whether he has a very good job or not. Guy man want to still enjoy himself (not necessarily frolicking with other girls). He will need to prepare himself emotionally and psychologically.

Again that both of you are into something does not mean he should be displaying your 'pinture' like signboard 'everywhere he goes'. Infact one the contrary some guys would prefer to keep such ladies in one reserved corner. I don't know why sha. No be say dem no love u oh or say dem dey ashame of u oh, ehen.

A lady at 24, already out of school with even a masters is ready to take the important step in her life which is marriage whereas a guy man like I stated above is not ready. Very few guys will want to. I for one would have love to get married at 26, but at that time I was way far from it and my fiancee who was 24 was ready emotionally and psychologically. For my side bread-wise (financially). Due to strike and extra year I was just preparing to go for youth service. My brethren, that time during service our telephone calls that time (Nitel era) dey give me pains. She always pop up the question "when are we getting married" and I go just weak. I did not find it funny at all. Finally we got married 3 years after my service at the age of 30 and she, 28. In total we were in the relationship for about 9 years. It was a long one really and long distant for a period of 6-7years of the entire 9 years.

Op remember your question was if he really loves you, but along along the line marriage things come enter. My advice is just keep an open mind, get yourself busy, thank God you said you have a business you want to run. You did not state if both of you have talked marriage. If not, both of you need to define your relationship and where both of you want it to lead to. If yes, please give him some space and pray for him and for yourself. If he is not coming out straight, please move on, no hard feelings.

Johnwick64:
pls can I study petroleum engineering in UI with a fail in further maths..mind u I passed biology and geography

Basically, the O level requirement is credits in 5 subjects including English language and mathematics. So the three other subjects must naturally be subjects very relevant and related to the course of study. Therefore the three other subjects should be physics, chemistry and biology.

So even with a fail in Further Mathematics but with passes in the 5 subjects listed above, you can study petroleum engineering.

Just login to https://www.jamb.org.ng/ExamSlipPrinting3/CheckUTMEResults

input your registration number and your result will be displayed. Check bottom of the result page to see where to click and print out the slip.

Sister, the guy don get wetin he dey look for. So just move on. Life goes on. That is why our girls must be very careful. Besides if you didn't feel bad about the sex and you gave him willingly and was consensual, so wetin be the problem. Just carry on. Next time learn to define your relationships and know what you want in a relationship. The choices are entirely yours.

My sister up there PrimadonnaO spoke my mind. My summary first is (1) don't lose her (2) you can get married within the shortest possible time, it doesn't cost much eh! yes!

Bros let's ask ourselves, why do we marry? Jamb question......For companionship, For procreation, To fulfil/our sexual needs, Because God made it, To have children etc add your own...................Now I deliberately put children last because of you.

So you can enjoy all the above and decide to delay having children for some time (I know say your mama or hers no go let you rest sha no problem).

If she loves you like you stated, na she sef go cut down the wedding cost to a level you sef go say e don do. If family wants to assist, it won't be because you guys were stranded but because you both think you have a lot ahead of you guys and so want to do it according to the size of your cloth.

From what you described of yourself, you want to hustle, good. I'm sure too that she is the industrious type. With the right synergy and God on side, you both can move mountains. The Bible says one shall chase a thousand and two shall chase ten thousand. The power of two.

Like someone said up there, make use of the opportunity that you have. Let me even ask, how much wey you wan make and how long you go take get am?

I've been married for close to 20 years and still have some few close friends nearing 50 who are still searching. The problem for most of them is the feeling of regrets of not having to tie the knot with some persons that came their way 20 or 25 years ago. Meanwhile, the money dem still never make am finish. They are still hustling, imagine. So I know what I'm saying.

The above doesn't remove the fact that marriage is a serious 'business', with it's own challenges. Again like I would tell most young folks, you can't know your partner 100% before marriage. Maybe 30% or 40%, with indications to guide. The rest you will know when you enter - 6months or 5 years or 10years......down the line. Which tells you that it needs both of you to work.

I must not fail to say that it's best to marry your friend. The choice at the end is up to you. My the Good Lord guide you, Amen.

Hardebaryor:
Sep 6th and 7th.

Not official yet but that's when it's coming up

Okay. Many thanks.

Good evening all. Please has the university (UI) a fix date for the post utme?

Anonymus010:
Thank you so much. I will implement your advice. God bless you

I'm really impressed with the way Formidable1 analysed the OP's matter objectively, unlike the people up there wey their blood dey hot. I'm glad the op said her will implement. I pray God to heal your union. Formidable1 has painstakingly analyse the matter from your school days to after marriage and I go with his points. If you use the punch lists highlighted, you will be convinced that you have failed at some times and responsible for your wife's reactions and actions. Na so women dey reason and act.

I've been married for some time now. Marriage is plenty of work. 100% commitment from both parties. A woman may be feeding and clothing you when you're still in school, because your papa no get and she loves you gan no wahala. However, the moment the two of you are married, don't expect that to continue oh. She go change am for you. In fact you go see anoda side of her and like Formidable1 said, she will feel used.

Bible says men should love their wives, women should submit. You see as simple as you read it, it is so plenty of determination to achieve it. Once you show a woman love like you use to show her then in school, wey make she go out of her way to support you, by providing for the home, giving her attention (this one na 99 unit course for women) and showing you care (anoda 99 unit course), she will submit to her husband easily. Anything short of the equation, day marriage go experience serious turbulence.

Lemme hold break here. May the Lord heal your home OP in Jesus name, Amen!

What is the essence of doing this, for someone who has seen his/her utme and waec results and has uploaded same into candidate choice of university's post utme website for registration.

Funmmyastic:
18-24 years when a lady suppose to build her career is not when she should be chasing guys up and down.

All join my sister. She should be praying for the man she will get married to from that age bracket. Sort of filling her 'prayer bank' with her request, asking God for a leading. Not when she is approaching 30 and beyond.

Don't worry please. It means it has not been released. Bottomline, it would be released though not immediately.

In the first place, your mum knows why she did that. Only she knows your dad's weakness around women.

It shows a level of bonding and affection when kids sit on their parents laps. There are many adults today that their daddy especially never carried them on their laps.

However, as a girl grows up into puberty, the sitting on the laps is done with some decency. For example in this your case, if you had just greeted him as you came and sat on his laps briefly, that would be viewed as decent and morally appreciate. But if is not brief and longer than necessary it is wrong. A morally sound dad would even jokely tell you 'its okay, don't come and break my thighs, abi u want your mum to be jealous, abeg get up and get me a glass of water' . The daughter will smartly decode and understand. It is only an irresponsible dad that would allow grown up girl to sit on his laps and be gisting and watching TV.

There are not fast rules though.

I don't agree that they are stubborn. The foundation work start with the parents. That is bringing them up, nurturing them in an atmosphere of discipline and love. Tough! Yes discipline and love. With the parents setting good examples and being good role models for them.

You may have done excellently well on the above and it's time for them to go to secondary School. Here the parents must take their time to choose and decide the kind and type of school for their children. If you don't choose a school that build up on your foundation, the child could turn bad.

It's not necessarily whether you're paying millions as school fees. There are moderately priced schools that still give quality and quantitave education , that school churn out decent and well bred students at the end of 6 years in secondary School.

Can I get the one for UI - medical sciences.

tayo60:
The lady is suffering from hormonal imbalance. Any lady that has such will be secreting milk from her breast even when not pregnant. And this issue usually causes delay in getting pregnant in such ladies. Medical treatment is the solution.

You're absolutely correct. It even happens to women who have given birth, have stopped breastfeeding and not pregnant. A family friend once had that problem and what the doctor told her was hormonal imbalance.

I am a Nokia fan and have been since the days of 3310. I recently lost my Lumia 630. I do just emails, other simple tasks - calls, whatsapp. Not into gaming. Pictures? well just for project reporting basically. So now I want to replace and I am really torn on which to pick. My budget is not more than N32k. The issue is I want a phone that is not large like 6" screen, that does not lag, that does not heat up on use (very important- I no want pressing iron cheesy), decent speed with multitasking, has a compass (I like this feature alot cheesy), that runs apps like whatsapp, gmails, yahoo mails, other basic simple apps smoothly, good call clarity and overall phone with good classic looks. Hope I have not ask for too much. So please which Nokia phone is my best bet?

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I am a Nokia fan and have been since the days of 3310. I recently lost my Lumia 630. I do just emails, other simple tasks - calls, whatsapp. Not into gaming. Pictures? well just for project reporting basically. So now I want to replace and I am really torn on which to pick. My budget is not more than N32k. The issue is I want a phone that is not large like 6" screen, that does not lag, that does not heat up on use (very important- I no want pressing iron ), decent speed with multitasking, has a compass (I like this feature alot ), that runs apps like whatsapp, gmails, yahoo mails, other basic simple apps smoothly, good call clarity and overall phone with good classic looks. Hope I have not ask for too much. So please which Nokia phone is my best bet?

I've taking time to read through the op post and his other clarifications or comments. In my personal opinion the op doesn't have any problem. In fact like @cococandy said, the op is looking for trouble out of nothing. And just as someone mentioned, he's.....arrogant, noise maker and a social media freak. Must his wife celebrate him on social media? He should just learn to make the best of his marriage without SM. I don't subscribe to him giving her space or acting up to stire jealousy in her, as the results would be counterproductive. We humans are so complex. Since op said she's okay in all other depts except the SM stuff, I repeat make he let matter rest and stop acting like a baby.

This is not funny at all. Vigilante rescuing policeman! Did anyone see how the vigilantes kit up with their pump actions abi semi-automatic rifles looking like SARS? Something is definitely wrong with Nigeria. Thank God the policeman came out alive.