₦airaland Forum

advanceDNA:
Whats good for the goose has never been good for the gander in reality ......... u are just trying to establish equality where it doesnt exist and will never exist......
nature is not even fair for fvck sake.....one gender has a womb and gets pregnant and go through all the pain....the other gender just get up after orgasm and walk away and never worry about losing period, abortion risk, carrying the baby risk and so on...

....u can take it or live it....when it comes to sex and relationship.....the desires of both genders and the societal expectation from both genders are also not the same.......

Established equality where thr is none? Oga, when last men Married virgin last?
Out of 100 guys that Married, how many marry virgin?

That's pure equality wen it comes to sexual escapades. When u reckless girls you end of up with reckless lady

InfinityFabric:
I don't think u've ever gave this 1/10 of a thought. Men will always prefer VIRGINS, women will always prefer RICH or RESOURCEFUL.
If you like call men whatever, if u like call women gold-digger. Na so God create am, even Biology no deny am.

Now, in all of these instances, I don't see anywhere the ladies were forced. They willingly became WHORES.
Guy detest WHORES the same GIRLS detest POOR or BROKE.

Oga what good for goose also good for gander,......u want guys to have recklessly life and ladies not to have. Why? And the same time, you want man to do away with ladies who have past...... who will marry ladies you have recklessed in the past with?

u want guys to have reckless past and still continuing enjoy future, why ladies with reckless past to remain unmarried in future

What a selfish way of reasoning.

What stop both to have reckless now and still married in future or both to leave clean life now and enjoy clean partner in future

If men were God.


IF GUYS CONTINUING HAVING RECKLESS NOW, ITS SURE THEY WILL END UP WITH WHORES IN FUTURE, EXCEPT GUYS ARE RECKLESS WITH GUYS LIKE THEM NOW.

emekajacobogbon:
My love calm down and reason with me.
From your caption, "AS A CHRISTIAN" Means you are a core believer.
This is really a challenging time.
You didn't mention anything else besides gambling and it's effects in his life and how it's destroying things in the family.
What you need to know and do as someone who has tried all possible means to redeem him without success is this;
1) separation whether temporal or permanent will give room for the devil to gain access and have the floor to do more harms which is against your christian faith.
2) you have to know that Time is the greatest determinant, you have to know that the time to go and start life afresh and reach the stage you are now is the same time it will take him to come back to his senses. Love you more and cherish you more.
3) Instead of hearkening to the loudest voice talking to you now and whispering divorce, my reject the voice and tell the voice that what you need is MONEY.
4)MY dear channel all your strength, soul, body, spirit and mind towards making money.
IF YOU HAVE MONEY, YOU WON'T BE HERE EXPLAINING TO ANYONE.
5) YOU HAVE TO DECIDE WITHIN YOU THAT YOUR HUSBAND IS LATE AND YOU CHOSE NOT TO REMARRY.
6) I MEAN TOTALLY IGNORE HIM AND EVEN HIS SHADOW AND SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN
7) FOR YOUR INFO, 95% OF MEN ARE INTO THIS MESS. EVEN PASTORS....

I WISH I CAN TALK TO YOU ONE ON ONE

95% of men are making little money and the little they make, they waste it without taking it home? According to ur post.

Did you think Op can split everything happens to her here?

If husband dies, she will know that two loads have become one, but seeing someone who supposed to be the head and provider wasting little resources he earns on gambling everyday is tantamount of leaving in hell or bondage.


If this woman seperates temporarily, ....don't you think the husband may fasten his bet since the provider is no more at home?

If this woman continuous staying and enduring husband that deliberately squander little resources, did u think the woman can attain her goals?

What about if being with him now results to depression and ultimately death?

NB, if husband died or having challenges that are not deliberately caused by him, I would have supported ur advise 101% or, if husband taking care of house but indulged in fornication, gambling, alcoholism, we can still advise to still endure, but for this,.......

AlaafinOfOyo:
OP. This is another satanic advice. Note all the advice encouraging you to divorce your husband are from the pit of hell. Do Not heed them.

When she dies of depression, "devil in suit" like you would also go to her grave yard and preach that her family should take heart, that she is going to paradise.

The kids she would leave, fool like you won't make any provision for them to become somebody in future


Oga Deputy Jesus, bible is our constitution, read 1 cor 7: 14-15 and interpret it for us

Gadafii:
you probably have issues with comprehension, a man’s future matters to a woman if he’s going to be a provider and capable to protect her or not, while her future matters if she had been reckless

Women boldly say broke men don’t deserve them, so why can’t made men say women of dirty past don’t deserve them too

U re daft and i pity whoever around a stupid, myopic and egocentric animal.

.... because you want to be provider, you will do anyhow with ladies now, the lady ur buffon useless today, I think it's ur generation would marry them in future.

If u don't have issue with comprehension, you guys won't be doing one night stand with teenage girls of today and still be expecting to marry clean women tomorrow.

Dracula123:
The only condition for divorce according to the bible is adultery

Gambling is a very serious addiction and needs a drastic action before it can be stopped, grace of God is also required.

I stopped gambling about 3 months ago and every month, my fiancee request for my bank statement not only for the gambling but also as a check to my spending

I can tell you that the urge to play is still there but I have a lot of people to prove wrong and that's my motivation.

There are ways to help him you know

I recently also helped a close friend from it, though he hasn't stopped but it has reduced by over 70%

You people should stop all these rhetoric about immorality alone is the only reason for divorce. What about abuses and abandonment of Faith...... Read 1cor7:14-15 among others to update urself.

Prettycute90:
Since we got married, everything about the upkeep, rents, bills, feeding, general upkeep. I mean everything is on me and he has refused to provide for us as he always claimed he doesn't have. I have always be an understanding person who believe, I should be doing while I can, pending when things gets better for him.
I never knew he was getting little little, but was gambling away with it.

We really do not date for a long time before we got married. Because I knew him back then in school from a far distance. And we liked each other but didn't date. So, meeting again after graduation and in a different environment, made me believe I already knew and the fact that we already liked each other.

He was struggling with a little job when we got married. My foresight then was to grow with him. I supported him in all ways. Infact, during our wedding, most support came from friends and relatives.
Because I'm not the type of a wife that pressurized, It took me a very long time to know the nature of habit he had that has kept him low even before I married him.

He is a chronic gambler.
No money stays with him. He wouldn't even care about himself so long as he can afford little money to gamble.
Now, I don't have a job and too much burden has crippled my business.

To be honest, I'm losing myself. Sometimes I feel I need a therapy myself.
My husband has refused to change or make effort to make this marriage work.
Before I had my second child, he was pretending as if he has changed. But immediately I took in, he continues this lifestyle. I almost died due to emotional breakdown and responsibilities shouldered by myself.

I have done everything, (both family members have adviced him severally, I have prayed, fasted, cried, shouted, talked with a calm voice, all my efforts. but non is working.


Presently, since two weeks ago now, I don't cook for him. I source for food for just myself and my children. We barely have decent conversation in this house. I can't even remember the last time we had intimacy.
I always avoid him, each time he tries to get close. Because of the situation of things in this house.
We had two children and I don't intend having any other.
The cost of taking care of myself and the children all by myself is emotional hurting me so much.
School has resume and I can't even afford all the expenses of taking my first son to start a new school and I know, he would watch our son stay back at home. He wouldn't care.

We're in the house, but he's only concern is how to get little money to gambles.

Are these not enough reasons to divorce him?
During one qurrel we had recently, I told him I want us to separate for now, so we can work on ourselves, and he said he will be with our children not me.
I see that as way to make my children suffers.

What can you advise please?

I just want peace of mind.

I don't want to waste my youthful life in a loveless marriage. Where myself and my husband can not support each other to grow in Love. Rather, stressing me.

First of first ,seperate from and see if things would change for better, if he doesn't change and you dnt have interes in marriage going forward, I will advice you to divorce him.

Abifarin16:
People dey do things sha.
If I will date you we go discuss your past ooo. I no want here story.
If you have slept with at least 5 guys, done a groupie or switched with you bestie, me and you cannot be compatible.

I have a very creative and strong memory Biko.

And you dnt think those stories up there are not fantasies of jokes on social media!

Go back and read Gbemisola story, think of it's possibility in real sense.

Gadafii:
Yes
Especially that one that got pounded by Francis overnight, and later got 3k in the morning with even threat self

Person go still pay bride price for that one later

As long as men will always be the one to pay for bride price, women have no choice than to be chaste, if she decides to be otherwise, I pity the men that will pay for her damaged goods

Was lady that pounded her? The person that pounded her, don't he has a reckless past as well?
Is it only girls you talk about her reckless past wen it were girl and boy involved in one night stand?

Still not understand psyche of some guys,.....you want to eat ur cake and as well have it!

You want to enjoy recklessly and unlimited pussy at teenager year and at same time , dnt want to hear reckless lifestyle of ladies in the past,......how is it going to possible?

I will suggest you guys u start gayism , so that u will meet clean girls in future.

Gadafii:
This is how they leave reckless and ask you to forget about their pasts, clowns 🤡

Your future as a man matter to women, her past matters to you, no loose guard

If she’s for the street, leave her there, don’t bring her home

The stories you read up, is it only ladies that were reckless?

YxCEc2kUDRp2RWy:
Younger men only date older women because they're naive and don't know the headaches that come with being with an older woman
Plus she's 45 (no kids for you and no, adoption is not on the table), a larger body count, more baggage from past relationships, jaded attitude and a condescending attitude (why would she submit to a man she's older than by 2x?)

The older men know all of this and stays far far away

WHat u said about ladies,can also be applicable too, to a man of 60 that marries 23 years old girl

purples25:
Women don't see it as disrespectful, it is men that will make their existence miserable whenever they try it.

What about hypergamy nature of women!

purples25:
If it's the guy that's older, no one has a problem with it.

....but women see it as disrespectful to their gender, they hardly do it except if they have a lot to gain from it or they have pushed to the wall.

AndrewTate:
he used money and power to get more power stop saying bullshit Tinubu has been a very powerful man before presidency or you want to say Atiku can't afford that kind of money??
Reason properly before you talk.

If u reason properly you will know u re talking like foolish teenager

where did he get power as opposition leader? Is it not because of enomours money in his disposal? You guys just too myopic in reasoning, when u focus in one way, it takes grace for u to think in other perspective.



Did u think Tinubu started fighting people in power from 1999 (democracy)?

Where did Tinubu got power to fight Abacha? Had he become governor then?

Perhaps ur age doesn't make you aware that Tinubu fought Abacha and almost brought him to his knee.

TheGrandMaster:
Correct observer, Power guarantees money except he/she isn't motivated by money but money does not always guarantee power.

Except if he too doesn't want to use money to guarantee power, Tinubu as an opposition leader used enomours money to GUARANTEE POWER, that he used to fight people in power and defeated them, even when his party is in power.

chibestjerry:
Think of Tinubu (Power) vs Dangote (Money)
Think of Joe Biden (Power) vs (Elon Musk)

Which of the individual wields more authority and influence

Is then Tinubu (money) not used money to push out Jonathan (power)?

Meanwhile,Elon musk (richest man) and Tichiani (Niger president) which one wield more influence and authority?

Ladies and Gents can you accept/ endure this, going into marriage?

If you finally settled down with him or her will u be happy in the marriage till end?

Will you be completely faithful with him/her till end?

ebijimi7:
Good morning landers, its a beautiful thursday morning here in lagos,
Ok so straight down to the business without much hassle.

It goes like this, ok I have this girl I'm dating she has been a lovable soul a friend,partner,lover and mother.

She is caring also I have never met a girl like that in my life since I became an adult the only person that I know has those quality she possessed was my mum which is late now.

she is from kwale I think a town In delta state and I am from ondo so we have been together for couple of years now.

We had a heart to heart conversation she told me about her past and I also told her about mine.

[b]Though I've dated some substantial amount of ladies sha, I [/b]don't want to mention before una call me (Ashewo or brostitute ,

So in the long run while explaining she told me what transpired between she and some of her exes the ones that kept deceiving her and collecting money from her she mentioned about 10 of them which she actually supported to to travel out of the country but they neglected and dumped her after they got over sea, more of like she fell into the hand of bad guys.

What kept ringing in my head and making me scared was the fact she made out with some of them and I still get angry knowing that fact sometimes she would be crying that I'm using her past against her just because she was inlove and it didn't work out within she and any of her ex .

I love her but her past kept dragging me back and making me scared of taking the next step.

Not to mention all of what she has done for me but when I lost my mum she stood by me all through the difficult times she prays for me she was with me at the hospital for days until my mum passed out.

Looking at these are qualities I get confused the more because I dint know if I'm making the right decision by letting her go she rarely ask for anything

Please your candid advice I'd needed

But u too have dated ..... substantial amount numbers of ladies sha, what is different between you and her? Abi u dnt know the meaning of SUBSTANTIAL ?

Not until you guys accept equality in going to marriage, you won't have peace.

Infact, if she has alternative, I would advice her not to have anything to do with you, because u are not worth to be a good husband.

IF YOU ARE RATIONAL THINKER, YOU WOULD KNOW THAT, MAJORITY OF THOSE EXES TOOK ADVANTAGE OF HER, JUST BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO SETTLE DOWN. SHE DID WELL AS A CULTURED AND MANNERED GIRL, WHO WANTED PROSPERITY FOR HER HUSBAND TO BE, BUT INSTEAD, SUCH EVIL GUYS PAID HER BACK WITH EVIL. INSTEAD FOR YOU TO BLAME EVIL GUYS (YOUR GENDER), YOU ARE SHIFTING BLAME ON HER AGAIN.


If she is a type that doesn't use to support her guy with her hard earned money, you will also rush to nairaland to wail as usual.

The APC man only playing to the gallery , even though, the second man, went too far. If they insult judges, it's not the work of APC man to defend them, (not even when Abati has cautioned him), to the extent of attacking personality of the man that insulted judges on TV . Afterall, several judgements in Nigeria are enough for people to call out judges.


Though, several APC members already angry with Rufai, the way he has turned himself to Obidients spokeman.


I will advise Rufai to not only learn how to be neutral anchor man, but also how to control his temperament when interviewing visitors, the guests that your own Television station where you work invited.

Still surprising that people compare Seun with Rufai .

obembet:
20 years...how many years ur goat reign?

No wonder he quickly released statement ,that rivalry gone.

silvoclaira:




Humble yourself !!!!


From dust to dust. It all ends here.


All the gragra, from eighteen to eighty

From morning to night

Sunday to Monday

January to December

**
In a hundred years from now, all you reading this and all those in the Tribunal hearing will all be dead! **

And u? You will remain teenager til thy kingdom come.

tivta:
The truth is, girls will always be the major causality cause of gullibility, greed, thirst for material things or just natural body weakness.

Yes, I biliv you also know that several guys too, have eaten their destinies out, in the name of drinking and clubbing with diabolical friends?

The way girls need to be warned, is the the way glutonious guys in name of drinking beer should also be warned.

The person might not die physically but become living corpse.

Everyone (not only girl) should learn how not to trust anybody absolutely in Nigeria of today, even ur own brother, parents, or children. The way people looking for ritual money is worrisome and in dangerous trend.

In 90's when people hear certain person his into ritual money, neighbors did scare of him and kept him at bay, but now, they worshipping him and swarming around him.

May her killer not knowing peace till death.

moneyissweet:
When I looked at this Yul edochie I began to wonder if his father Pete really worth to be celebrating

Not until u realize that winning election must go beyond region.

And that you must respect personal opinion of people.

greenandy:
Propaganda unending. When nincompoops see the presidential election of 2023 as battle between Yoruba and Igbo, not battle to select a better president for Nigeria. In no country of the world except Nigeria will voters side-line a Peter Obi and go for a Bola Tinubu for president.

Going by track records , I dnt think Obi himself will make the list of a messiah.

They are birds of a feather.

Highlife217:
I hope and pray this country gets worse, it doesn’t deserve prosperity

Bragging as if ur elu p , will bring prosperity. oga, stop deceiving urself by having false hope. All of them are same, they only hungry for power but pretending to like messiah to come.

Several of tinubu fans are regretting today, if it's to be Obi or Atiku, the same scenario will play out

fatherjesse:
Be not deceived, they know what they are doing, trying to make it look they truly want to do the right thing.

Oga, as at now, the judgments are pure correct and unbiased........but u can never see anything good in it unless they push number 3 to number 1.

The same judgement acadabra you urself had condermed in ur locality in Imo.

Ndigbo not only at war without, but also within. Indeed, this is trying time for ndigbo within and outside Nigeria.

If you want to make any ndigbo goes toxic, just go against "Saint Obi the perfect man" in his/her present, the rest won't be palatable that day.

mbahdi:
They are all useless
Already bought judges

Oga, if u re a judge, what will be ur judgement on the matter?

Therock5555:
Madam you were not there so don't assume what you don't know. Ask yourself this question, if they had remained in Nigeria, would all this have happened?


No wonder some women are called snakes cause they could remain loyal to you for awhile, then go haywire when given the chance.


Make una dey change una mentality oh

Only insignificant of women that really loved their husbands fully, many love their husbands only because of financial security and to help them shapen the destiny of seeds that came out from them.

To buttress my submission, 8/10 of wives would poison minds of their children against their fathers, if the husbands having unresolved issues with them .

Kobojunkie:
Lol... so let me ask you thiz then. Was Osinachi's crime that she went gaga after gaining success? Was that why her husband killed her? Is that the same tale as far as other female breadwinner wives in Nigeria who met a similar end?

Hope u know Osinachi died of abuse and not direct gunshots? Besides, I bolded the word might in my post, I biliv u know the meaning of might