₦airaland Forum

In this modern age


Honour killing indeed!!!

jidegirl12: @ what are you saying now? Being jobless when they met and after married doesn't give her excuse to folds hands and slave somebody else's son now ?

OP I don't advocate divorce unless its life threatening situation, however there's a divorce on irreconcilable differences grounds ( any reasonable reason) but I don't know if that exist in Nigeria.

Honestly some people are just naturally lazy bums, hunting for handouts in disguise hence 'Marriage' .

Sitting home and waiting is not an option.

lol, my sister, you should have known me better now, im never and can never be in support of an idle wife, expecting another human being like herself to work himself to death because of her own financial needs, especially, when she knows quite well that the man isnt a Dangote or an Adenuga, isnt that wickedness and laziness on the part of the woman
However, im also an advocate of "never marry a person with the aim of changing the person later" . Im very sure the op, must have seen that laziness trait in that woman, but he was believing that, he could change her after they get married, alas!, the woman refused to be changed, so, in my opinion, i cant advise him to divorce her, all i can say is that, he should continue to educate her on why she just have to start doing something that will bring in additional income to the family.
May God help them o. Amin.

SAM1979: 4 years in marriage wt a kid while expectn another baby in 2 mths tym. My wife has bluntly refused to set up business and has neva earned a kobo in 4 yrs of marriage. Efforts to implore her to start up small-scale business has earned me insults & abuse. The Mother has alwaz encouraged her evil deeds. i dnt go visitn her parents afta d abuse on my 1st visit . Am into small scale private business to support d family. Lately, am seriously considering divorce & to take custody of my daughter. Is divorce on grounds of idleness, abuse and insult permissible in court. Wht might be required of me as obligation thereafter? This lady caused several problems which led to loss of my banking job and a small protocol contract i wz doin later?

eeeya, sorry about your ordeal but didnt you know she wasnt working when you married her didnt you discuss about this, before tying the knot
Why did her mother insult you when you first paid them visit and what was her reactin then
Does she have a certificate with which she can apply for job
I dont think divorce is the solution to this problem, i think you can restart the whole thing right again, all you need is mutual understanding of each other, call her at her best time and discuss with her, let her know the implication of being the only one to run around for the whole financial needs/wants of the family, let her know that you love her, but you will appreciate her more if she can complement you financially, beg her, if need be, and be on the look out for the business or job she can do after delivery.
Believe me, bro, its not an easy task for a person to be a "Mr all in all" financially in the house, its depressing, its frustrating, infact, it can be deadly, especially, in our present economic situation of our country, but, you can overcome by being more open and approachable, so that, all may end well.
I sincerely wish you goodluck, in your quest for her cooperation.

aadetoyin: Nat-Geo Wild is my hubby's favorite station. chei! If u see the snakes they show ehn!
Those Oyinbo sef. Some of the snakes are fine sha but I can't imagine them close to me in real life.
Lailai

my sister, are yu sure you are not me , because, we seems to have many things in common, that Nat-Geo wild and animal planet stations are my hubby's favorite stations, and becos of snake, me, i no dey watch, i just pick up my lappy and start nairalanding............

Pls, let the woman be, she might be a timid type, and besides, we are differently created, and raised in different background, with different values and perceptions.
As time goes on, she will change and if she doesnt, at least, what she doing is not crime oriented.
Its the man that will have to accept her the way she is, and if necessary, correct her in and with love.
We are not and can never be wired the same.
May God help us all.

Age is no barrier, my brother, sebi, you are even some months older than her, i have seen those whom their wives are older than, and they got married, enjoying their marriages to the fullest, carry on, since you have seen what you want in her, you love her and she does too, and even ready to settle down with you, what else are you looking for.
Wishing you goodluck, bro.

Sorry for your ordeal, and thank God it all ended well, im happy for you.
Kids can truly be naughty, sometimes, one has to be really patient with them.
Meanwhile, whenever any of your kids annoys you, its better to punish them and let them be.
May God help us all.

Hhhhhhhmmmmm.......jemgbetiele funra e.
He was my most preferred entertainer them, missed him a great deal.
May he continue to RIP.

Oluneutral..................because, i dont judge, when there is disagreement between two parties, im always on the fence, no sentiments or preferables, all im used to is to beg the parties involed, i dont blame, neither do i praise any party, and since my name starts with "olu", people just added neutral to it, hence my nickname, even till today, some still call me the nickname.
May God help us all

Make google your friend.


Sorry for your loss and may he rest in perfect peace.

My biggest fear...........missing heaven, i just dont want to and i will not, by His grace.
Then,
Fear of losing any of my loved ones, like hubby or any of my children, oh! God forbid.
And finally,
the sight of snake, oh no! I hate and fear these creatures, maybe, because of the curse God put between us and them. Nat-Geo wild station is my most hated station, because of the sight of snakes, which they cant do without.
May God help us all.

ujutonia: Hi everyone, This question has been bothering me, i want to knw whn kids about 4 and 3yrs of age always hug nd says I love u mum,or u re d best mum. is it really from their heart or they learnt it from somewhere maybe cartoo. My kids always does that each time i get something for them or after eating.

yes, its real. Its from their hearts.

Personally, i dont and cant condone infidelity and at the same time, i cant allow anyone to drag me into it, because, i know the stand of God against it, and also because, two wrongs can never make a right.
God forbid, if it happens to me, and kids are involved, just like this story, i may not divorce him, but i will rather separate and be praying for him to have a change of heart, and at the same time, consider myself as a temporary single mother and work hard to take care of my children, till he comes back to his senses and repent.

Infidelity, in its entirety is bad, apart from the fact that it is against God's will/commandment, it is as well detrimental to our health.

And for those who repay cheating for cheating, i want them to remember that.................two wrongs can never make a right.
May God help us all.

Simply ask your parent a very simple question, that, what would be their wish for you, if you are the one that is physically handicapped, im sure this type of question will melt their hearts and have a change of heart towards him.

What is happening on this thread?......

Scarpon: all this?? my granny didn't do this stuff but he died 112

not how far, but how well.

Another points.............
purge your thought, because, as a man/woman thinks, so is he/she.
Choose your friends wisely, bad company corrupts good manners.
Believe in yourself, if you think you can, then, you will.
Do unto others what you want them do unto you.

May God help us all.

Congratulations!!!
May the arrival of this beautiful angel bring forth good fortunes to you and your family.

Welcome, baby girl.

Now, for those who care to know, i have gotten the full gist today..............


What really happened is that, truly, the girl who is 4years old and in K.G 2(also known as prenursery class) actually cried after her friend's mum, when she came to pick her child, and since the little girl refused to be pet, the woman suggested that the girl be released to her, that she would go with the two of them to wait for her daughter's friend in the administrative officer's office, so, one of the teachers in the class took them there and they were in the A.O's office waiting for the other mum, so, by the time the other mum was around, she just went into her girl's class directly, and she didnt see her daughter among her classmates, all effort to explain what happened to her fell into her deaf ears, she was just screaming, and that was the time i got there to pick my own children, so, all i was just hearing is "why will you allow my kid to leave the class".
Not until when the girl, her friend and the friend's mum came with the school's A.O that the case was settled, but i had left before then, so that was why i thought they allowed the girl to follow her friend and her friend's mum.
I think the mistake the teacher made was to have waited for the girl's mum at the gate and took her to the A.O office straightaway, instead of allowing the poor woman to come to her daughter's class, only for her not to meet her in the class with her classmates.
And, i cant blame the woman. If its me too, i will react, abi, what do you think.


Now, i only used the scenario as an example, what about out older kids, pre-teens, teens and older kids, how well do you know them?i will appreciate if this is discussed, instead of the school/the teacher that made mistake.
Thanks and may God help us all.

nikkykay: i dont think anybody has given d op what he really needs or why he is scared!

and what do you think he need/want

[quote author=rol/ed]Am a Lady
Continue to sleep on NL nah what's my bizness.Time u would use in thinking of better ideas to make more money you are here.Help your self so that your kids don't have fly bikes to school anymore.Help your self so that you and your hubby won't be sharing that 1999 corolla.for your mind u don insult me abi .how long do u intend to live in that rented cheap 3bedroom of yours.imagine the area sef Iju ishaga. .serious work resumes tomorrow.Tk[/quote]hehehehhehhe...........
Lobatan.......
Yaba left escapee.....
Effect of not completing one's dosage, you see now, you shouldnt have ran away from yaba left, where you are supposed to be, eeeya, pele o, may God heal you and may He help your jealousy too.

acidtalk: Hello my fellow Nigerian / African brothers. There's something I will like us to discuss but in other not to waste too much of your time let me just ask the question straight away :

Which of the following Items to you consider as a LUXURY to provide for your wife to help out in the chores in the house?

House Help
Washing Machine
Vacuum Cleaner
Yam Pounder
Dish Washer

Let's be very honest. I will share the reason why I asked this question in a short while.

as for me, i wil appreciate......
-washing machine.
-vacuum cleaner.
-dish washer.
I dont need yam pounder, poundo yam is there, neither do i need a househelp, all the above items will go a long way to reduce my house chores, and besides, househelp can be somehow sometimes, (hope you understand what i mean).
Meanwhile, im not a guy, but i believe i have spoken the mind of most men here.

dominique: Never thought I'd see the day

haba! Im human now, im aint an angel.


Okay, my sincere apology to all those i have disappointed, pls, forgive me, im on my knees, but pls, always remember that im a human being, and thats my signature, remember, human beings will always be human beings.
May God help us all.

My mum used to tell us that,"the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom, she would even say, if we do something bad to other person, God will not waste time in dealing with us, then, we used to think...."ti iya yi ti poju jare", but as we grow into adulthood, we understand that, the best way to enjoy life is to do unto others what you want them do unto you, and it has really helped me im all my relationships, hardly, infact, i have never initiated fight with anyone in my life, i get along with people easily, and people always want me around them, because that fear of God is there and i dont think i can ever do anything without first thinking about God's presence and the outcome.
Thank You my mama for instilling such attitude in me.......love you unconditionally, maami.

byvan: My first time of reading her angry post..

dont mind me jare, my sister, you know, im human, and sometimes, one just have to react that way, im aint perfect, you have just seen my imperfect part, but sincerely, i have the right to, imagine that imbeccile typing that rubbish, when has posting threads on NL equal to joblessness, so, i just have to put him in his place....lol

vikeb: Thanks nd Thanks @ Greatgod12!Gods blessings and continuous favour!

thanks and for your prayers, i say amen and i wish you the same.

eni orisha: @greatgod2012.Are u an anglican? 'cos i like ur swift answer.meanwhile,why will d atheists & d like stop pointing 'fingers' to d christians in d name of justifying what u believe in; just hold on to ur belief & we christian to ours! Peace!

proudly anglican!!!

ileobatojo: I have to say, I love it when catches fire!!

dont mind that eeediot jare, even, if im a full house wife, i dont know how that got to affect him, even if i open a thread on how i ate this morning, how is that his problem, well, it seems hes has just taken what he has been warned not to take(o ti je eewo) and its getting on his brain.

debrief08: Much as I agree that parents should know their kids, friends etc but no school especially in the present security challenges should release a child to anyone else apart from parent or designated ward.
Schools should haave I.D cards which only a parent or person sent by parent should have before a child is released. If you let my child follow anyone else without my permission una go reach court oh.

yes, that is how its supposed to be, and they are really trying in that school, even though, the parents are yet to be issued an identity card, but i've never heard such case with them, all the pupils are usually in their classes with their teachers with them even after closing time, until the parents/guardians come to pick their children/wards, but on this fateful day, i didnt really get the gist before i left, but, you know, the friend's parent is also a parent, somthing must have transpired between the teacher and the friend's parent, well, hopefully, tomorrow, i will get the full gist.

engrtee: Kids change, you cant know them hundred percent.

thanks and may God help us all.

ileobatojo: You have said it o. The school is responsible for this MAJOR goof up!

, your questions apply more to teens and maybe pre-teens. With respect to this age group, yes you should be involved in their lives as lovingly but as firmly as possible. Their Facebook and phones should be supervised and controlled. If there are friends that they spend a lot of time with, then you certainly should know where they live and it's a good idea to know their parents.

Ultimately, guidance starts from an early age where you instill good values in them. Teach them kindness, how to choose good friends, how to make healthy food choices and how to be self reliant/self confident and responsible, how to be trustworthy. Then you don't have to monitor every little move they make when they are supposed to have some degree of freedom.

thank you and God bless you.

[quote author=rol/ed]What kind of cheap,insecured, atakara sch does ur kids attend.No sch I'd?So anyone can just walk up to pick any child?
Besides the kind of thread you open sef.I can see you work in a govt parastatal that's why you ve time for such[/quote]excuse me, what is your problem with my handle
What has the type of job i do got to do with you or my threads, are you high on something or what
Do i know you or have we met before
Are you sure you are mentally alright
Pls, i beg you in the name of God, ignore this handle next time you see it, if it gives you headache or it arouses your madness.