₦airaland Forum

Anyone that needs the help i could afford to render and that im in position to offer.
May God help me.

amdman: Thank you for your many suggestions.

I believe in the efficacy of science also and we are currently working on a step by step process as advised by our Gynaecologist. We are yet to explore adoption options (mainly because we are both under 35 and still have some time to wait). But its a good one nonetheless.

you are welcome.
There is time for everything and this is your time.
God will answer your prayers speedily IJN and we are all going to rejoice with you by His grace.
It is well.

Wow!!! This is really touchy, sincerely, tears were rolling down as i was scrolling down to read, what an emotional outpouring and expectation!!!

Well, the God who answered all those who were looking up to Him for the fruits of the womb will definately answer your prayers very soonest.
I want you to always remember that those children who came later are usually covenant children, they stayed longer in order to take along with them everything that will make their lives and their parent's lives better. They stayed longer to take along their good health, fame, success and parental joy over them along with them. Therefore, i join my faith with your faith and i declare that, every good things they are staying to take along, they have already taken them and they are coming to you very soonest IJN.
However, God gave us the gift of science, ensure to explore all the necessary medical and scientific explorables, in order to fasten the process. It is not lack of faith, it is putting our faith to work.
I will also like to suggest(its a suggestion, and you will have to carry mummy along )if you people can adopt a little kid, to make you have the feeling that you have a baby, while also waiting for yours, and even, when you adopt legally, the kid is yours, and that does not mean you will not have your own biological children. I know a couple who was advised to adopt a little child in order to fill that necessary gap in the family, and to the glory of God, it was the 3rd month after they adopted that the woman became pregnant, today, thay have their 2 biological children and with the adopted child, they have 3 kids now. Remember, all things work together for good to them that love God.
I pray that, by next year's children day, you will have your kids to pamper the way you wish.
My regard to mummy and always stand by her, to encourage, to exhort, to uplift, to admire and to always make her happy.
It is well.

albridge: When a mans trust in his wife is betrayed by her having affairs with other men and he caught her red handed with a man on top of her should he still stay married to her or divorce her? Is there a place for christian forgiveness in such a case?

no one here knows your mind, you are the only one who knows what suits you in this kind of situation, but these questions can help you to take the right decision........
-will your wife forgive you if its you that was caught red-handed like that?
-how will you like to be treated after the act if you are the one that was caught like that?
May God help you.

Happy children to all the kids.
Always be obedient to your parents and teachers and every older people you come across, but weigh and pay attention to the right advice.
Always do unto others what you want them do unto you.
Do not lie against another person.
Do not take what do not belong to you, its called stealing.
Always remember that you are the future leader, and plan to make us proud.
Be diligent in your studies, so that you can come out in flying colours and make your parents proud.
May God help you and make all circumstances favorable to you.
May God keep you, guide you and make his face to always shine over you.
Happy children day to you all!!!

jeffizy: Children , don't ask mummy to keep the money Uncle gave to you.
She will tell you she used it to buy you candy last year!
.

which kain advice be this najeff. Abeg take time o, sometimes, when im broke, i tactfully spend my kids money

The fact is that, a single lady who agrees or accepts to date a married man knows shes causing distraction in someone else's marriage, and whatever one sows is what the person reaps, even in multiples, so, when the lady finally settles down, somehow, sometimes and anyhow, someone will also cause distraction in her marriage too. Its not a curse, its called "karma" and this karma is immortal, always alive, active and agile to repay everyone accordingly.

Not until we treat others the way we want them to treat us, things cant be normal and we cant get there.
May God help us all.

In my own opinion, i think your mum knows what shes doing, i think(i may be wrong anyway) shes trying to secure your future. When all of you turn out good in the nearest future and your step siblings are not, they start coming to you for assistance of various forms, and by then, it may be like they are disturbing you, so, your mum is trying to nurture (train)them in order not to be dependent on you people in the future. So, for this reason, i think you need to let her be.
May God help her and all of us.

ileobatojo: By the way, the time and energy spent reporting him to his wife could have been spent asking him for your money.

ifyalways: I didn't read yhe whole thread hence I'm commenting based on OP's opening post.

1) Why did u guys go to the wife? Why inform the wife when you've not yet confronted/reminded the man?
2) You and ur hubby decided to forfeit the loan so why the noise? Why raise a storm first?

Long story short : This is not worth the noise, anger. There is no lesson to teach anyone here. Women should learn to know when to jump into "men affair", you never might just know what other non-financial favor that man might be extending to ur husband.

we didnt really called the wife to report her hubby to her, she also came for financial assistance, and we had to tell her what transpired btwn us and her hubby to her, in order to let her know why we felt somehow relunctannt to help out, we actually gave (dash)her some amount we could afford, and we let her know that it was a gift, but, it wont be okay, if we just gave her a token and do not let her know why we were reluctant to give or borrow her the amount she requested.


However, i thank everyone who has come in, in one way or the other to advise, we are learning everyday, and i must confess that my heart is already melt, considering all what i have read here. I thought we are been taken as fools, not knowing that, some other people can be doing such.

Actually, we dont give out what we couldnt afford to lose, but in this case, how can one believe a grwn-up man can lie against ATM and bank, we thought he was sincere and that is way we gave the exact amount he requested for. Well, we have learnt our lesson.


For the upteenth time, let me say it again, im aint annoyed because of the non-repayment of the loan, im a giver, i know and im a living testimony of "givers never lack", but what annoys me is the game he played to get the money and the game hes playing till now. May God help him.

Im not bitter against him, i dont keep malice with him as someone thought here, we crack jokes, we relate well, but i always think we are fools when i see or play with him.

Once again, thank you all, its bygone already, the responses here have already melted my heart and i have decided to let go.

For those saying i want to disobey my hubby, no! Im not and i will never, but no one can always be right everytime, sometimes, as human being, we just want confirmation from maybe 2-3 people to ascertain whether one is right or not, no one is an island of knowledge, sometimes, someone who is most times right may be atimes wrong, if the majority posts here support my confrontation, then, it means, hubby isnt right this time, then, its time to talk it through with hubby since hes not an angel, he can also make mistake in decision making, so count that out, that im disobeying hubby, im only sampling opinions, which is one of the ways one can be wiser.
May God help us all.

Its myth joor!
I for one have never caught one in my life and the lady that caught mine over 8 years ago is still very single till now.
I believe its mere coincidence if a lady get married almost immediately after catching boquets.

Haba! People with jungle justice sha!!!
The man could be using the condom with his wife as a form of family planning/child spacing now.
May God help him o

Thanks to everyone who has taken out time to advise me, i really appreciate every posts/posters here, may God bless you all.



I think i need to clarify some issues on this matter.
Firstly, the money given to him wasnt hubby's money alone, it was our money, when hubby couldnt get all the amount the man requested for, he asked me to add more to make up to what the man requested for, afterall, we thought the money will be refunded after 3 days.
We were together when hubby handed the money to him.
That man claimed that ATMmachine swallwoed his card, so we thought he would actually refund the money after sorting it out with his bank on the said monday. Imagine the gravity of lie he told us in order to pity and assist him.
@vikin, he never forget about the money, hes only trying to be smart and ungrateful, so said his wife, even, the wife claims we aint the only people he has done that to, he is even doing it to his wife sef, so said the wife. She even said the same thing her hubby did at where they were living before.


Now, what im furious about is not really the non-repayment of the money, but the way he behaves/relates with us as if all is fine is what im angry about. He greets, plays and even ask for some things from us as if nothing is between us. For example, we just bought a car recently, and the man instited that we must "wash" the car for him separately, i was just wondering the kind of shameless man he is.
The most annoying thing, according to the wife is that, she doesnt even know what her hubby is using all the borrowed money for, as shes the one who carry bulk of the family's financial responsibilities.
I tire o.

Once again, thank you all for your responses.

I think this man is taking us as fools, and im getting furious towards the man.
Last year April, one of our neighbours came to hubby for financial assistance, he said, he went to the bank to withdraw some amount at the bank with his ATM card, and he claimed that the machine swallowed his card, it was on a Friday, and he came to hubby and asked hubby to borrow him the cash till Monday, when he would have sorted out his ATMcard issue with the bank. Hubby gave him the money,(with my knowledge, of course) and since then, the man has refused to pay the money back. Now, what is making me furious is that, the man never talked about the money, he has been relating with us as if nothing is between us, he has never talked about the money, not to talk of how he is going to pay the money. I asked hubby to ask him the money, hubby said, there is no need, all he know is that, the man can never come to us for financial assistance again. We reported him to his wife, his wife said a lot of bad things about him, how she has been managing/coping with his uncomely attitude. The wife even promised to pay the money back, but hubby asked her not to worry, because, the woman do not have much with her(shes a private school teacher). Now, im feeling like confroting him, not in order to collect the money, but to just let him know that we aint fools, and to also let him know that its not good to behave like that, to let him know that he isnt smarter than us, but hubby wont allow me.
Now, please, advise me, should i confront him or i should just leave him alone. Each time i see him, i feel like hes just taking us as fools, what do i do?
Thanks.

Yeah, the joy of new born baby is worth celebrating, infact to any length, but, we as a family, dont really lay it upon urselves to MUST do it the way the society or some other people are doing it, our key to the celebration is AFFORDABILITY. Each time we have a new-born, we are very happy, but we celebrate and conduct the naming ceremony with what we could afford, we invite pastors to help us conduct the naming, use prayers to usher in the new born into the world and entertain the guests with what we could afford to do, it isnt a must for us to kill neither a ram or goat or a cow, if its fish or meat we can afford at the point in time, we offer it. We believe that the most important aspect of the naming ceremony is the christening time, i mean, the time the name (s)of the baby is announced to the public.........., every other aspect is mere ceremonial feferity.
What happens to the baby in terms of caring and nurturing after the naming ceremony is what is really relevant to us as a family.
However, im not trying to condemn those who spend billions of dollars on naming ceremonies, if one can afford it, there is nothing wrong with however one desire to conduct naming cermony, children are precious gifts and they worth any amount spent on them or on their behalf, but AFFORDABILITY is my own concern here.
May God help us all.

jidegirl12: Kids are different and grow with diverse milestones range, I can't even begin to tell you what I'm still doing for mine

don't worry when time comes you'll - hear I can do myself ! with a frown

yes o, with a frown indeed, i remember when i wanted to clean for my 7yrs old boy and he looked at me with a frown and asked..."my mum, when will you allow me to do some things on my own, i think im getting bigger now".....immediately, i asked, do you want to clean for yourself? He said....."yes now, i should be able to, stop embarrasing me" wow!, i left him immediately, and when i got back to the living room, guess what........i was made jest of by hubby.....he said...."lobatan, since you refuse to let the kids grow, they have started demanding for their freedom by themselves,.....i like that"

so, @op, when the time comes, they will demand to be left to do some things on their own. Relax!
May God help us all.

Yes, its possible.
Remember Jacob and Esau, weren't they twins

Congratulations!, and welcome on board!
As you have started the 9-months journey, may you get to your preferred destination with joy and fulfilment.

Human differs, pregnancy differs. Sme have high risk pregnancy and some do not. Some women are so lucky that they dont have any problem at all throughout the pregnancy period, while some women encounter several problems, some problems are even life-threatening, well, it all depends on individuals metabolism, no one is a "guru" when it comes to pregnancy issue. No matter the category you fall into, your destination, i mean success or otherwise depends on your approach to life, whatever one believes he can achieve, definately, he can.
Now, first of all, get registered for ante-natal, its never too early to get registered and ensure you get tested for all necessary tests you may be required to do, never joke with rhesus factor.
On each and every antenatal visit, never feel shy to ask any question bothering you, that is why you are there, no question is too ridiculous to ask abeg.
Next, take all your drugs as at when instructed.
Exercise, not very rigorous one o, but ensure you walk for at least 10 minutes daily.
Take a lot of fruits, its good for you and for the baby.
Drink a lot of water, it helps to regulate the water in which the baby lives(amnioatic sac/water), and also good for bowels emptying.
Try as much as possible to live in peace with everyone, happiness and laughter plays some roles too in easing childbirth.
You may strangely crave for some things, its normal, its caused by pregnancy hormnes, but do it maturely.
Avoid negative thought, remember, as a man thinks, so is he.
Avoid to much stress and ensure you have adequate rest.
If possible, avoid soft drinks and beverages, like milo,or bournvita, i heard they have tendency of making babies bigger, which may make delivery more difficult.
Do not because of pregnancy, run away from your hubby, invite him and enjoy yourselves on bed and as time goes on, you will know when to change you sexual positions.
If possible, get a copy of a book known as "everywoman", it addresses most of your fears.
One more thing, save towards the d-day, you may be needing some extra money, so save and always ensure you encourage your hubby to save.
Pray always, especially for yourself, ensure you always lay your hands on your tummy and declare what you want concerning the preggy.
Now, i wish you safe pregnancy and joyful delivery, but if probably your doctor advise you to go through CS, please, do not argue, accept, they know better than we do, many have killed themselves, due to this ignorance and unnecessary fear they impose on themselves.
May God see all if us through o.

@op, firstof all, the husband is either a boy, and not a man or has been remote-controlled by his folks(i hate to say this, but how can a man threaten divorce just because of hearsays), so, in either of the case, prayer and patience are what the wife needs.

Secondly, advise the wife to start doing something that will make her financially less-dependent on the woman, it helps to increase and improve one's self-esteem. If the wife is independent, she will attract respect from both the hubby and the in-laws.

Thirdly, the wife should learn to deal more wisely with her in-laws, especially when they are around, now that she already know that they dont really like her in that family, when they are around, she needs to reduce the number of calls she make/receive when they are around, (if that is what is giving them headaches), this is just in order to give peace a place.
May God help them and all of us.

missojugo: My Sister pls pls and pls you are not paranoid. You don't need Holy Spirit to slap you first before you send her packing! Please give her a full months pay and send her back to her parents tomorrow!!! Take your baby to a good Creche when you resume work I beg you. A word is enough for the wise. How can ask someone whose own kids died mysteriously to help you take care of your child?? Its. Good to help others so give her a full months salary and pray for her. That's all

this poster have said it all........pls, adhere, children are precious than being gambled with.
May God help you.

Thank God your kid is fine, healthy, strong and intelligent. Its only those kids with the above gifts/qualities that can do all you said hes doing. However, be more watchful and observant.
Weldone, our effort on them shall not be in vain.
May God help all parents.

Abegi, that woman has the right to vent, abeg, 17 years with the man and 4 kids to crown the union/relationship, no be beans/joke, infact, she has the right to show op's coz madness.

Who knows what she(the wife) had gone through with the man, we are all human beings, we have to learn to do unto others what we want them do unto us.
@op, if it was your coz that this happened to, how will she feel or handled the situation. The fact is that, that man is a pathological liar, he only said those things he said about his wife to your coz, in ordet to win her soul, tell your coz that she is worth more than that man, because, that man may later treat your coz the way he treated the first woman. Abeg, truth is bitter, but, say it, it might save her life and restore her sanity.
May God help them all.

I never knew somen women could take this sh..it, but going through this thread, its an eye-opener, but the question is, can men take this type of shi t from their wives, all in the name of greener pasture...........that is food for thought for you men.

Is the sibling involved sick or amputated if not, why cant he/she wash his/her cloth himself/herself
I have never done it and i dont think i can ever do it, except for health related reasons.
May God help me.

[quote author=samm_miey]Not every1 dat drives is insane.[/quote]but how do you know the sane ones on the highway

As far as im concerned o, long journey driving no be for me o, call me a coward, na you sabi, life no get duplicate.........may God continue to protect us all.

See an optician, you may think the itching/pain is as a result of slicing onions and it may not be, the itching or pain may be a symptom of an underlying eye problem, so, it'll be wise for you to see a eye doctor, hes the one in the right position to tell you what actually is wrong with your eyes.

Pls, desist from self medication or "trial and error" about your eyes, see an optician.
Wishing you goodluck.

Reliability or trustworthiness do not have gender, it depends on the upbringing, personality and belief of the individuals involved.

May God help us to build good character.

So also me, it depends on whoever im angry with, if its someone older than me, and whom i respect so much, e.g mum, elder sibling..........i keep quite, any attempt to talk may brin our tears from my eyes.

If hubby, i keep quite a while, then either write or text or mail him later to express my feelings.
If friends, i just ignore, sometimes, i hiss and walk away.

May God help us all o........anger can make one look mad, if not properlly and maturely handled.

Hes an intimate predator, because of the vulnerability of the lady/s in question, and also any other names you may call him(as i dont gbo oyinbo ), the fact is that, the man is a cheat, an unfaithful and a complete useless man. Can he be happy if someone is helping out his own daughters in such way.


If he really want to reach out to the less privilege, isnt other better way he can go about it.

#confused fellow

idprincess: I am interested in buying.

why dont you buy a new @one my sister, you can buy the one that has no spin fr now, as its less espensive than the one with spin, its around 20k-23k. Even, if its less than 7kg, you can get or student WM, you can get it below 20k.

I pray to God to bless you and meet you at the point of your need........ Amen.

SPEECHLESS

Seems you are confused, if you truly love your present partner, why dont you tell the other woman directly not to call you again, as your partner wont like such thing, or betterstill, when else she calls, tell her you are busy with your partner. 2-3 times of that will tell her what you mean.
I see no reason why you are panic concerning your forthcoming wedding, except if you have cockroach in your cupboard.
May God help you