₦airaland Forum

honey86: well those that have tips on how to cope when children come should kindly share.Thanks

its all about upbringing, planning and cooperation from your partner.

Im a working class mother of kids, first and foremst, i plan how and when to do my chores, and then, my hubby assists me.

For example, someone who was taken care till when going to higher institution by househelps, can hardly cope without househelps, because, that is what they are made to believe.



Proper preparation, prevents poor perfomance and its also about maintaing a home.
May God help us all.

My ifanu........last born mi........ His name is Emmanuel

God bless all our children. All these kids are so lovely, so adorable, so blessed. I declare God'sprotection on them all. Spirit of excellence on them as well.

@all parents, well done and thanks for your care on these kids. Your efforts shall not be in vain on them.

Those babies in the picture do not look like new-born babies, however, i pity the parents and i also think they were been too careless, atleast, the pregnancy took them solid 9 months or even more, before delivery, how come they have not made adequate health and delivery preparation for the delivery, even, if it will have to be at a maternity centre, atleast, it would have been better than the risy they took.
"oyun osu mesan ko ye ko bani lojiji"
May God console them....... Amen.

ileobatojo: Not a 'pregnant baby'. The baby was a twin. The other twin died in the womb and got embedded into the living twin's belly. Later caused problems by likely blocking the bowels and that's when the baby got sick.

even with this your explination/enlightment, i still think its somehow, well, thank God the baby made it, but............some words are better left unspoken.
May God help us all.

All of you making use of my slogan, prepare to start paying o, each time i see my slogan, it means you must have paid in the account i just opened for that purpose, anyone who uses it without first paying will be e-dealt with.
The account number will soon be posted, get ready.......


@pataki/uju, pls, i take God beg both of you, let sanity return, let go and let be plssssssssss.

I doubt if this can happen again in their lifetime.

It depends on the way its being chewed.

preetydiva: Fellow Nairalanders,

pls ur sincere contributions to this thread will be very much appreciated. Because it'll give me an insight on why most of our nigerian men take their hardworking wives for granted...They stop complimenting her looks,or cooking,simply because they're not 'toasting' her anymore. I feel gestures like compliments,gratitude and the likes of it shouldnt be seasonal. Especially in marriage! It shld be for always.FYI,depriving her of all these things (which by the way are free)might lead to Depression,Comfort-Eating habits,Adultery,hatred, etc


(Pls ladies in the house,feel free to join in.)

@op, you may think like that, but its not always like that, men, too are emotional beings, and if their women dont appreciate them, they also have the tendency of doing the same, so, if you feel deprived of appreciation, not complimented, not flattered, why dont you try and give them first.
There is a popular saying that says......."do unto others what you want them do unto you". Also, Gods words says, "give and it shall be given unto you", therefore, i will advise you to give the compliments first and you will definately get them back.
May God help us all.

Under normal circumstances.......NO!!!


But in an abnormal situation(s) like....
-old age
-one or both is physically sick.
-one or both is infected with STI, and they have jointly agreed to abstain from each other.
-when the man suddenly become impotent
-when there is irreconciliable differences, but both still share the same apartment, and inevitably going to divorce.e.t.c.
Then............YES!!!
MAY God help us all.

@op,Probably, your hubby-to-be has been hearing a lot of sad marriage stories, and the thing is scaring hell out of him.

If he has refused to talk to/with you and psting crazy messages, you can send message or e-mail to him to express your feelings, and if he doesnt change, you too can start posting crazy messages and facebook posts on your facebook wall, maybe, that will push him into asking questions, which will also serve as an opportunity to voice out your mind to him.
I wish you goodluck.

@op, sometimes, it happens like that, i think your hubby is frustrated, because of his inability to secure his dream job, just be patient with him, take care of yourself and prepare for your maternity, hopefully, the arrival of your LO will be blessed and fulfilled.
Meanwhile, use the little amount you can afford to get the very essential few baby things you can get, and be prayerful, i believe that, with time, things will come around.
However, you can as well talk to him about your feelings, in an encouraging manner.

Wisdom is the princial thing, something of this nature requires wisdom, and i will suggest you pay her a visit at her place when both her and hubby will be around, and ask wisely in the presence of both of them when you can call her, but before you can do this, ensure her hubby know you as a real friend and not otherwise, and also ensure that the hubby is comfortable with both your calls and your visits and also ensure that, you are ready to become the family's friend.
May God help you.

If im the mother of this lovely girl, i would have arrested whoever is/are involved in this wickedness.

profjustine: I love my husband, but he shares clothes even boxers with his siblins and he knows i hate that. Am just tired of buying new wears because of this. He happened to be a graduate and should know the health implications. Pls advice me on what to do. Thank you

profjustine: Boxers is a personal wear n can cause itchin n discomfort wen 2 pple shares it n for d fact dat he slips wit me n does his siblins also slip wit women makes it more disgusting

are you a lady Or you are just standin in for someone

Well, our children know both of our ages, i really dont know a genuine reason for parents not revealing their ages to their children.

This is too much, cant they negotiate with him, instead of belittling him to this level, haba! Oriade a gbe wa o!

Locust beans(iru).
Yeast.
Instead of vegetable oil, be using palm oil.
Carrots.
Crab.
All thase are very rich in Vitamin A, which is essential for good sight.

@op, there is nothing to be scared of, recently, my friend's sister was diagonised of the same thing and shes done with her surgery, and she hasnt got baby yet too, sometimes, it happens like that, the Lord will be with you, the earlier you get the fibroid removed, the better for you, dont panic, the Lord is in control. It is well.

Wrong make-up, i guess.

EmmyDe25: PATIENCE JONATHAN great woman?? Pls what is her antecedent in the league of those women u mentioned?

if she doesnt make sense to you, im sure she will make sense to some pple.
Sorry, i quite understand that everyone cant like her. Pele.

Do unto you partner what you will want him/her do unto you.

Two things could be responsible here.......
1. Check her company, some of her friends might have been teaching her, calling her names, pushing her to demand.
OR
2. She might want to end the relationship very soon with you, hence, the attitude of "i must collect things from him b4 i leave him"............check her and yourself well, are you sure you have not offended her.
May God help you both.

The person who gives ultimatum in relationships is looking for an excuse from the other partner to break/cut the relationship. Shikena.

Lilimax: In the company where I work, we have more married women then unmarried ones. Although, most of us were employed as single ladies before getting married. We were not sacked after getting married. Our marital status does not affect our productivity at work. The management ended up building a creche for the staffs who may wish to bring their little ones to the office.

and this is what should be done in every organisation to encourage married women, but unfortunately, its not so, so, what most of these married women do is to set up business and manage it, since they wont want to be a full time housewife, in order not to be relevant in the family and society at large..
Well, may God help us as a country,

If it happens to me, i will just explain my part and ignore them after wards. With time, the truth will prevail.

NewJ: Since your man will only pay attention to Bible things and not much of your emotional needs

Seduce him with THE SONGS OF SOLOMOM

Chapter 1:4"He shall lie all night betwixt my breasts.
:22"Open to me, my sister, my love, my dove, my undefiled.
:25"I opened to my beloved; but my beloved had withdrawn himself.
:28"The joints of thy thighs are like jewels"
:30"Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins."

:20 "Come ... blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his
garden,and eat his pleasant fruits."

Stop reading Lamentations sister, Songs of Solomon will bring out the best in your husband.

thank you jare, in asmuch as it is within marriage, seduction is allowed, afterall, they are husband and wife, why will the man sef deny his wife because of fasting and prayer, isnt time for everything........time to be intimate and time to pray, none should interfere with each other.

May God help them o..

Opera Mini: Haba madam, seducing person wey just finish fasting, aren't you sending him back to fast again for forgiveness of sin?

is she not his wife
what is sin there

Amelian: I can marry from a poor background, as long as he loves me sincerely and he has prospects, he is hardworking, he has a job and a heart, why not? ... .

this is exactly what we are saying.

@op, have you educated the man properly
Has that man ever heard about the great women we have, are they not making their families proud, women like Michelle Obama, Hillary Clinton, Queen Elizabeth, Patience Jonathan, Dora Akuyili, Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, and even GreatGod2012, we all make our families happy, its not only the males that make families happy. The man need proper orientation.
May God help him.

MRbrownJAY: @OP
i fully understand why your partner wants to try his hands at something else, since he is miserable in his place of work...... but i suggest you sit him down and ask very important questions such as:
- is the problem your job OR being in 9ja?!
- tell me more about what you expect us to do there OR how you expect us to live there.
- do you know how difficult it is to get a job abroad (especially in these difficult economic times)?
- what job do you expect to get there that will be better (emotionally) than what you got today?
- if the US was so great, why didnt you stay there the first time around?
- should we get married BEFORE or AFTER moving there?

i think you should open your mind about Nigerians living abroad........but one thing is certain, there is no way you can raise a happy family in the condition you guys are in at the moment

thanks MBJ, you've just help them to analyze their problems and profer solution, if they can understand your post.

Better thank your star that hes not an ungdly man, if not so, the marriage would have become hell for you, all you just have to do is to cooperate with him during the fasting, and after breaking, seduce him, hes your husband, you should be able to know what he can easily fall for, abeg, enjoy your godly marriage jare.