₦airaland Forum

abasifo:
Ladies Are Apples.

Green or the RED ones??

The Sly:
Nahhhhhhhhhhhh!. . . . .Why not using an Ipod screen for your TV then?
As for me. . . .I love me the big TV oooo. . . . .Why would i Wanna buy the small ones just because they both display the same?
Its like saying A PC is a PC. . . . . Be it pentium 1 with 2mb hard drive.
Unless of course, thats what you truly prefer and not just because of some unnecessary absurd reasons. . . . . .Life too sweet pass than one abeg!

I agree with u Nigga SLY . . . .

Life is too short to deny one's self the luxuries of life.
Spend but do it wisely.
I try to enjoy maself. . . . .There's no guarantee there would be a 2nd life after this one.

RedHotChic:
Whatever!! whether it's pounds, yen, dollar or naira, it's the quantity that matters and not the quality.

Exactly ma point!!!
The pounds have more quality. . . . . .with a ratio 2 to 1 . . . . . .U have got no chance!!!

Queenisha:
hannibal again eh?
what's wrong with this boy?
any thread he comes to,he just scattters the whole thing.
They'll soon lock this thread.
Hanni abeg na!

Abeg what??
I am sure u weren't suffering from conjuctivitis when Hotfunmi used me honourable name for her silly analogies.
If the thread gets locked. . . . it ain't because of me. . . . .the original poster is the culprit.

RedHotChic:
I'm safer from you that way because you can't afford me.

Me and you?? Are u out of your freaking mind??
The residue i give out to various charity organisations is enough to keep u off the poverty bracket for life.
You won't have to milk cows ever again. . . . .  . . .Comparing the ALMIGHTY POUND to the weak dollar. . . . You must be spastic!!!

RedHotChic:
This boy [/b]just came back from the brothel with Klimepet and is his mother is not home so he comes to nairaland to discuss with [b]men.

Who are the men?  Youse??
Buncha clueless cretinous cold-blooded vermins.

I have always known u were a dyke though.
When a babe milks cows in Nebraska, drives humungous trucks and carry a piece. . . . her status becomes SHIM.

RedHotChic:
Scene 1:

Funmi: Hey sweetheart, I really think you should change this 1998 jetta for something better, may be a 2007 quatrro.

Hannibal: ohh no, I'm good. I prefer to put my money in stocks and bonds to wasting it on trivial things like car besides, this car still runs good .

Funmi: But your professional colleagues roll in something better and more classy besides it's important for business.

Hannibal: Don't worry; I believe in saving and investing my money.

OR

Scene II

Hannibal: Where do you want to go eat?

Funmi: Oyster parlour

Hannibal: haba, do you want me to sell my balls for a plate of food? what happened to mcdonalds or Popeyes?

Funmi: Forget it, can we go shopping now?

Hannibal: Can't we find another form of recreation besides shopping? Sweetheart, let's save and save and save in case of tomorrow.

Scene III(Cheap women)

Hannibal: sweetheart I think we need to go on vacation, maybe somewhere in thailand.

funmi: Nooo honey, I really want us to buy as many units as possible in the dangote flour shares besides, why can't we travel to ogbomosho or calabar  for vacation instead of wasting our money travelling to thailand?

hannibal: If you say so, what about buying you a car.

Funmi: naaaa, am good. Our office bus comes often besides I can carpool with my coworkers. Buying another car now will entail higher insurance, more gas allowance, parking fees etc. Lets save honey.

I may have to get a restraining order to keep your ugly ass at a distance.
Whatz all these analogies. . . . . . . .  .
U couldn't pick any of your 600 vagrant boy/fs. . . . . .Why Hannibal??

@Dr. Kitaun,

Rooney is the best English player.
That dude can play football when he wants to. . . . . . . . . .
Opponents would rather have Wazza in their team than against him.
His energy, verve, awareness, vision, aggression, and the hunger to succeed surpasses any English player i know.

Pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase, Gerrard doesn't even come close.

@ Debosky,

Don't make me dent ur nose with a sledge-hammer.
Anderson pay ma school fees??
Try Alex Song paying yours.

doyin13:
I still don't understand why people often overlook Ruud's holdup play.

Drogba is often held up as a shining light when it comes to playing the lone man upfront,
but that's because Ruud isn't in the League anymore.

Ruud was a strong boy and he could hold the ball up like no tomorrow.

Invaluable for a team which plays the lone man upfront.

He learnt the hold-up play at Real Madrid, not Man Utd.
When he was here, he relied so much on Giggs, Beckham, Silvestre and Neville pulling out good crosses.
That was how he scored most goals added to beating offside traps and nicking rebounds.
His positional sense is the best in the whole wide world though. . . . .He is the best at reading the flight of the ball.
He is always at the right place at the right time.

doyin13:
Well Ronaldo's goal tally was also padded with his penalty count. . . .so all join.

He only scored 6 penalties in his 42 goals last season. . . . .That leaves anutha 36 odd goals.

Lampard isn't really my cup of tea, style wise, but there is nothing that causes more
headache for a defence than a player coming from deep, to advance beyond the strikers.
Lampard is very good at that. . . . . .So I think he deserves his props.

Lampard is just lucky to be an Englishman. . . . .
If he was from Mali, he wouldn't even play football.
Michael Schumacher(F1 driver) is more technically gifted than Fat Frank.

Gerrard and Lampard don't work I think, because of a debilitating over respect for each other.
Neither one is preapared to take charge.
A better player than Gerrard. . . .Err Rooney perhaps

Rooney is the best English player out there.
Gerrard?? Not when Anderson is on the pitch, abeg!!!

doyin13:
Hmmm. . . .Well, I will take your word for it.

I have always felt, you can only gauge the mettle of a striker, with how well he can create
space for himself and his team, and not necessarily by his goal tally at the end of the season.

Etoo and Torres have the speed and strength to hold the fort on their own.

I have only seen little of Alves and he doesn't seem to have much of either.

And I do agree, 30 milla for Berbatov is crazy talk. Even at 20 mil, I am hesitant.

What does Ruud create on the pitch??
Outside the danger area, Ruud is as useless as anyone. . . . . .He can't tackle, track back or even dribble.
However, once Ruud gets into the 18-yard box, his mystic powers quadruples and he tucks the ball into the net.
Afonso Alves in Man Utd would score 20 league goals if he gets to start 30-35 games.

Abrahamovic will cover up for any negative deficit!!

The Russian Billionaire wants the HOLY GRAIL and he thinks money can buy it.
He keeps plugging finished players anywhere he can find em and fixing em into the well-laid foundation.
When they fail, he removes em and look for better products. . . . . . Whether this would work in the long run remain to be seen.

The wage structure is so delicate that should Roman walk away from Chelsea or dies accidentally, Chelsea would collapse within months.
Besides that, they need a bigger stadium to up the inome generated every matchday.
While Arsenal n Man Utd make 90-93 milla in a season. . . . . . .Chelsea is way way low on the scheme of things.
The ratio of income generated to the revenue raked on matchdays would eventually kill Chelsea if something is not done ASAP.

@ Doyin13,

Lampard is a waste pipe but he is lucky with goal scoring
Fat Frankie shoots and the ball is going wide but someway somehow. . . .a leprotic defender gets in the way and deflects it into the net.
Besides, he takes Chelsea's penalties which also makes him look good!!!!!
Frank scored 10 league goals for Chelsea last season and he still finished as their highest goal scorer.

@ Doyin13,

Afonso Alves is good. . . . . . .He is top draw.
Draft that kinda player to United with Tevez and Rooney in the attack and with slide rule passes from Carrick/Anderson then u would marvel.
He's got the deft touch but when u play amongst retards . . . . . . . . The potency gets diminished.

Torres wasn't exactly a ball of fire in Athletico Madrid. . . . .Etoo was half potent at Mallorca but he loved scoring against Madrid!!!
Team quality is the determinant here. . . . .The kinda passes n space Man Utd players would create is the KEY.
I'd rather have Alves at 15 million than Berba @ 30 milla.

Fish head?? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
I can't stand any head. . . . be it fish, goat or lion.

debosky:
Alves? What is his pedigree in England? little or nothing

What was Van Nistelrooy's pedigree in the EPL? U can add Torres and Zarate to that group too.

Everyone is raving over Santa Cruz now, but the man has probably had his first injury free season of his life; I can wager he will get crocked as he used to at Bayern from this new season, you would simply be adding another Saha to your team.

I have known Santa Cruz since Nigeria 99. . . . . . . .He is a very good player.

Berba simply needs an iron hand to motivate him properly. I trust Fergie to get that nonsense out of his head and make him work hard. He is your man.

Fergie is now old. . . . .The hairdryer treatment is getting ineffective.
CQ is now off so Fergie won't have all the time n space to do the job of a SHRINK while monitoring Nani/Anderson's whores in Cheshire.

What do you mean he doesn't play quick counter attacking footie?? Did you watch the CC semifinal against Arsenal?? Berba, Lennon and Keane tore Arsenal apart with speed, quick thinking and sharp shooting - it all depends on the coach. The slow and languid Berba is of the Jol era, the Ramos model is much better.

Arsenal is not a quality team anyways. . . . . . .That same team was beaten by the BIG 3 in the season.
Liverpool(UCL), Man Utd(EPL and FA) and Chelsea(EPL).
Don't use Berba's performance against the Gaynners to prove his worth . . . . .what was his performance against United??

@ Debosky,

What benefits have the youth policy reaped Arsene Wenger since he started flogging off the old guards/veterans??

The problem i have with Wenger is not the trophyless season but the donkey stubborn attitude of sticking to the same plan!!!
Now. . . . .Arsenal's gonna start the season with light-weights and pasta-boned players that can easily be bullied off.
Bolton, Blackburn and Chelsea would be licking their mouths to chew and mash Fab4 and that foetus(Ramsey) u signed.
Flamini is now gone so whatz left in Arsenal?? Gallas??

Yet anutha TROPHYLESS season beckons.

[quote author=HR.hotness link=topic=151495.msg2512014#msg2512014 date=1216168827]Actually referring to them as "birds" in d first place says alot about u
Honey, suicide really doesnt solve anything, but if u must, u must. . . I'm sure u will be missed [/quote]You don't get the message. . . . . .
I would never think of suicide as the last resort so the message is telling u it's 100% impossible for u to measure up with Hanni!!!!
The kind of chics i date are the ones u look up to in em gossip magazines.

Birds, dames, wenches, gurlz, mooses . . . . . .whatz the difference??

debosky:
It was 2 million pounds

Thats what you cats don't get, AW wasn't after the money on this deal, he wanted Bertie to be happy and get good wages for the rest of his career, so he decided not to ask for an inflated transfer fee so the club can afford his wages of 3m pounds a year.

This deal was NOT about cash, it was simply a way for Bertie to get what he wanted.

Ohhhhh Myyyyy Dayze. . . . . . .You should be named Debosky Wenger.
I am yet to see a Pro-Wenger dude like u. . . . . .even if Arsene shytes, u would say its chocolatez!!!
Are u insane?? How can Bertie be happy playing for Panathanaikos??
A player wants 2 or more years on his deal to be in London with family and u sent him to Greece where he cannot even enjoy UCL??
Debo, u are a sadist!!!

Tottenham is asking for 35 million now.
I would personally have Fergie's head on ma cross-wire if he pays such ridiculous amount for Berbatov!!!
Whatz so special about Berbatov. . . . . .I'd rather we sign Alves of Middlesboro or Roque Santa Cruz.

Berbatov is the laziest player i know.
Imagine Tevez and Wazza working their socks off to nick the ball with Berbatov just strolling back from the offside position.
He just doesn't fit United's kinda play of quick counter-attack and he does not offer much aerially!!!

@ Debosky,

But for 1 million pounds Thatz HARSH.
Why not keep him as a veteran like Scholesy or Giggsy.
How does a million quid help Arsenal's financial situation??

RedHotChic:
On a more serious not, you guys can thrash talk Funmi but don't thrash talk my royal family because you and I know too well that what Hannibal said is a big lie. The problem is that somebody may see it now and think it's true. [b]There are no gays/lesbians from Osun and I can swear to that on my ancestors grave because we are spiritual people and things like that desecrates our land. [/b]You can go to Ondo, Ekiti, Oyo or Ogun if you want a thing like that but not in Osun, I swear and swear again on my grand fathers grave. Case closed.

RHC, don't take shit personal!!!!
U might shorten your life span with this tantrum-throwing.
Chill, relax and start breathing.

[quote author=HR.hotness link=topic=151495.msg2511863#msg2511863 date=1216165430]@ Hannibal
You r only bitter because i look better than your girl

Dont worry, no hard feelings [/quote]If u look better than any gurl i have been with consciously or subconsciously, i would KILL maself.
HR Hotness to the birds i roll with?? ?? Are u shitting me?
Try compare a donkey and a Bugatti Veyron on a race track.

@ Dr Kitaun,

Henrik Larsson was a loan deal. . . . . . .We didn't pay 28 million odd pounds to sign him.
Tevez's deal is yet to be tied. . . . .huge debt is hanging which United must manage well or we face a huge crisis.
The effect of this senseless transfer deal tells us on fans. . . . . .I must renew ma membership again next month(it has been increased).
Matchday programmes. . . . . . . matchday tickets(2-3 matches) i watch every season too plus football shirts/merchandise.

The increment is beginning to take it's toll on me. . . . . .Fergie must buy Huntelaar instead.
It makes more economic sense than old and lazy Berbatov.

ndumart:
Obviously SAF is less concerned with when Berba's productivity declines. The gaffer wants immediate results and since Berba can guarantee him at least 20goals in a season then he is ok.

SAF may quit OT in about two or three years time and whatever happens to berbatov becomes less of his concern.

FAUX!!!!!!

First all, Fergie loves United with all his heart. . . . . . . .
There's no guarantee SAF would leave OT in the next 2-3 years. . . . .This is not the 1st time he would announce his retirement.
With CQ gone now. . . . .that might extend Fergie's stay by anutha 4-5 years to allow 2nd in command to bed in.

Unfortunately, the guy i would have loved to take over from Fergie. . . Vicente Del Bosque has just been appointed as Spain's national manager.
Marcello Lippi, anyone??

doyin13:
@Hanniball

Oh yeah I forgotBarry is above Carrick in the Three Lions pecking order.

Must explain his value. How much did you lot pay for Carrick again.

23, 24 million?

Shut ur traps, Bozo.
3 LIONS me ass. . . . . . .and that was why they failed to qualify for Euros.
Playing Gerrard n Lampard together has not worked for England. . . . . .The strength of England's midfield is on the bench.
Hargo n Carrick are the key. . . . . .hopefully either Lampz or Stevie G would wilt away by World Cup 2010.

Yes, we paid 18 million for Carrick and he's won 2 EPL titles and one UCL in 2 seasons.
How many other English midfielders can boast of that??

Arsenal can have Gareth Barry. . . . .who cares?
The best English midfielders are in Man Utd. . . .Scholes, Carrick and Hargreaves.
Michael Carrick is the most improved English player in the Premiership. . . . .
His vision, interceptions, subliminal passes and awareness makes the United team tick. . . .
The only holding midfielder that does not tackle and cop needless yellows like Makalele, Flamini, Mascherano and Mikel.

Geezers, Fellas, Dudes, Players. . . . . .Take it easy on Funmi.
At this rate, y'all might carry her casket on y'all conscience!!!!
She is not to be despised, she should be pitied.

RedHotChic:
It's only you that's heard this rumor and it's not true else post the link to the story. What did my royalty do to you? Ilesha people savoured your father's integrity because he couldn't get a woman to love him by giving out your mom to him, isn't that enough to be grateful to my people?

CLASSIC!!!!

Anyways, lemme school ur nappyhead!!!
Incident happened some years back!!!
I was lucky to be kooling off in Nigeria then so i heard about the story in it's pure, unadulterated form.
Was ur King caught humping anutha man or not?? Heard em OPC thugs/Bakassi goons thrashed ur King's ass like a common pick-pocket.

RedHotChic:
Please stop spread lies about my kingdom before someone here takes it serious. Do you have any link to substantiate this story?

PataGay, Gaynnibal, Gayldee and Gay Sly all went out drinking and Patagay fell over gay Sly and the kiss was warm and cormforting,

Gaynnibal challenged Gayldee to do the same but his halitosis is so discomforting that Gaynnibal is considering becoming monosexual.

Now u are ranting like a juvenile. . . . .Act your age for once. . . . .
The last time i checked, u were closer to 40 than 35 so grow up!!!!

Tell us the reason the palace got torched some several years back.
I have the dossier with me and if i see any spurious report, i shall hang u for the vultures to feed on ur nether region.

doyin13:
Ojigbijigbi. . . . . . . .It's a wrap

As my first customeryou get it for free.

And you will not be disappointed. . . . . .Even if I say so myself

U may have to tread carefully there.
HR Hotness is the identical twin sister of Azeezat in Lagos.
She is so ugly her siblings don't take her to church on sundays.

RedHotChic:
You are so busted, Thank God for HR.Hotness.

I think your name should be [size=14pt]GAYNNIBAL[/size].

Only Ijesha men are that inclined.
Did Guardian Nigeria not report your Oba humping one of the palace guards??
Was that not the reason your village palace was burnt down several years ago??
Don't make me spill the beans so shushhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Heifer, Brighton is a tourist centre with one of the few beaches in England.
Every tom, manliness and harry goes there to have some fun so bugger off.
Flaming illiterate!!!

[quote author=HR.hotness link=topic=151495.msg2511477#msg2511477 date=1216157341]And u know this because. . . . ? [/quote]Shut up there. . . . . .Who doesn't know Brighton is a gay town!!!
Why ain't i surprised, u stay in em dinghy part of the country. . . . .How's Isle Of Wight??

doyin13:
You should be less obvious with your comments jo. . . .you this IRON MAIDEN

Don't be angry, Senor. . . . . . . .
I was only trying to get a brother back on track.

RedHotChic:
HE's SO GAY!!!!!!!!

U are such a wrinkled Arrow.

doyin13:
E mi. . . .work for bank. Tufiakwa

Banks are nothing but moral cesspits, where souls are sold for money.

I would rather sell my body than work with earth scums like bankers.

Any takers, . . . . .  

There's a gay bar in Brighton called "golden ballz"
Your services would be highly needed there.

Cristalz:
@Hannibal/ RHC
I'm speaking from a Nigerian perspective on Nigerian happenings. What's my biz with American banks? If they've burnt y'all,my shoulder's not available to cry on. Obama's very much available

Is this ur escape??  
Banker's wife!!!!