₦airaland Forum

I think not wearing is not an issue but the fact remains every principal must be fit and dress ok to make a rescue effort easy(for the bodyguard) if the situation/official engagement turns negative. Afterall in engineering irrespective of your culture you dnt want to go close to a machinery with flying cloth

Do you have to tell ur uncle or anyone you want to use to replace him as investor why you want him replaced?
if the business is worth it,ur relation would gladly invest or you combine with such relative and buy over his share.
You dnt have any right going to talk to him about ur lady,if for the confession you feel you have the solution,apply it which includes getting an investor and above all get from her in clear terms what steps she hopes to take to avoid such bcz they didnt also plan the first time it happened.
Whatever u decide,ur solution is not the answers we give u here but that fear u have about the future,cure it through the effort of hers you can see not her promises,u can have her even if she turns bad(God forbid),but are u sure u wouldnt later,one of this days u might be weak and want a leverage for what u know abt ur partner.
To me its better not to start living a life than start and it turns you to someone else due to choices you have to make or live with later

I think in all fairness why we cannot advice here is we do not know much about this relationship,I for one am always of the opinion that each needs much communication and flexibility.
The preparation can start now and the date fixed for month of the pop bcz what if she has an uncle who secures her a job in Abuja right after service,will she not also have reasons?
I just dnt get why people do not make it in long distance relationship when ladies leave anambra and most eastern states to delta and ph every week for "runs" as well as come from Enugu and Kano to Abuja and still graduate for the undergrads.
Lets say with my level of exposure I expect life to be about living and not fighting,if she doesnt want it now,relax though her reason is no reason(a friend was transfered same day of his white to northen Nigeria) and see her through by providing the fund or encourage her develop through personal trainings while on service. If for any reason ur not ok with her reasons,move on but it shows for one,you both are actualy not in a relationship as you cannot workout anything without involving people

Really funny how Nigerian politicians play on the minds of average Nigerians
The proper thing is if there are agencies that are stationed at some places and government doesnt want them there,they write through the office of the President to the head of such and its an internal affair,thereby criminals do not capitalize on it in any way;but regular users of such points get informed during the various process they go through.
EFCC and ICPC are not at these points,they are only invited in or come in when there is a bad stuff going on,like the case that made Ya'ardua stop the concession and after that assignment,they were gone,by their establishment,they supervise every other enforcement activities(read EFCC act).
for NIA,not even the President can stop them at the ports,they are there for intelligence,same time work in other agencies and are in foreign affairs and all our embassies abroad,they do bodyguard duties together with sss and in most cases like at airports,in guards of the MD are NIA and sss but lead by NIA.

agencies at the ports are there for their job and if their approach is wrong,head of such are advised to revisit and made to make it alot more easy,not telling Nigerians

same government official that goes on air to say the President has lost powers to grant approvals on an issue,that people who have been going to see  him at night will now stop, wow

Nigerians dnt know 40% of what is happening in govt,they have the desire,

In the judicial process, there are always casualties,some on the alter of the system not wanting to look weak,some on hate and other reasons; and some on lack of defense. I think this case was one that was based on the last, when there are instances of no proof,it lies on the suspect to show beyond all reasonable doubt that he is innocent by every help he can get mostly guided by his attorney, in this case it didnt, all the drama was based on was on racism.
We killed Troy,Georgia didnt, if the petition was able to gather that number of signatures,means if someone had thought it wise that it was funding that was needed to hire private hands to prove him innocent,then people would have made donations no matter how little.
You do not win a case by claiming bais or racism,you create holes in the prosecutor's case and either have ur sentence minimized or case thrown out.
I watch the drama in courts and its pathetic how lives are toyed with by the hands of those we hand them over to.
The defense didnt do enough!

1.do you experience same with another usb device like mouse,if yes,download your driver from your brands site (eg hp.com) and re-install
2.also confirm if you have a pc suite installed,uninstall
3. open ur browser and remove any proxy
, if you try the above and do not have it fixed, get back to us with what you have,someone might have an answer for you

@Poster
You are sick!
Sentiment apart, you have your life to live, if you choose to screw him anytime even when you are married,its your life and as an idealist, I would be last to ask you to reconsider, because its what gives you joy you are doing, its called having control over some things in your life, though the society calls some a vice, as long as there is no physical punishment by law, you live your life as you choose, get drunk at home, cheat, anything you want; but blogging about it on forums that are not meant specifically to receive such, u need help,bt nt 4rm us

@nanidee (f) & All sending all sorts of replies here:
when next you have a post as this, do state ur sexual orientation : bi,les or straight, would assist us comment on ur opinion.
in as much I do get ur message,bt I think u are either bi or a les,either way, no problem with one as I have friends who are,but the difference between my friends and you is, they share their dislikes and know they approve/disapprove of it and its fun, but when a gay friend tells me about the dirty panties of a gurl in a train, I understand, you just did.

My point : I understand both gender have their flaw at clubs,events and public places, but I think our views depend on several factors,not just as you see them. very many threads on NL are based on clear jobleznez

what I'll say here might not be ok to many,but you have to read on and try if u think its ok and ur doctor gives u a yes:
1. relax and be a man while being with ur queen(here ur wife/gf I guez)
2. u need to drop ur fear for pregnancy,get educated on birth control if u are not
3. spend good time on fo-replay
4. minutes b4 pen,try to cu-m,either b4 fo-replay,alone or with her assistance,since she's ur gf,she already knows u are 2min man,so let her help u cu-m during fo-replay and subsequent rounds u would be surprised how long u can go
5. its caused by ur inability to control ur urge to pe-e,am sure ur did wet the bed when u were young,try to get arous-d,get an ice,place it on ur manliness(with d ice alone u should come up),try keeping it for sometime, do it constantly till there is improvement in how long u last (rotate the ice over urself and make every part of u get used to withstanding such feeling).
6.avoid watching porn b4 meeting, it creates high expectation in u,and ur gf might be less than d ladies u find there,so u compare and think on bed.
7. stop fantasying about how ur gf is not flexible in bed and also stop imagining another lady while meeting ur gf

, the worst feeling is feeling,u are not up to,u can overcome this, its one life u have here, live it under ur control as much as u can

I am not a doctor but married;have these advice for u:
a.visit a gynecologist,test and treat for infection,(you both should test,have u been having slight itching or she creamy discharge anytime u get 2 know:bacteria/fungi,even though u use products like K-Y lubricant,dnt confuse it with d creamy discharge if its not her ovula-tion time )
b. stop getting her feel horn-y one week to her time if u alone cu-ms and abandoning her to hang,u must make sure she glady gets up like u.
c.Do not get meet with her a day to her time,if u are observant by now,u should be able to tell to control ur feelings,it gives her heavy flow the second day of it.
d.deworm regularly and treat for malaria,but after a test and on prescription.
e. do some exercises, register her in a gym if she has the time and walkout together once in a while
f. undertake body massage once in a while,learn to do minor ones without hurting urselves as u dnt need to go always 2 d profnals,but visit one if u can afford it, u need it too, 4 the daily stress n pressure at the office,driving in the traffic and being a male in this world.

, hope this helps

@poster: 6 things might happen :
1.u'll forgive him and go back,get married and live everyday of your life living like you are tolerating him(in real case get old feeling u deserved better)
2.u'll leave him,go on with your life,live with fear your new man wud do same and never trust a "male" xcept your son (but would never show him love like u'll to your daughter as he is a male (every male on earth faces same isolation).
3. u'll leave him, get married to someone who wud know abt your past and live his life pitying u,trying to pls u and take away d pain till his death(but never getting to freely love u as he expected to grow up and have a woman in his life without painful past and u end up crashing it n he cant leave like u,bcz he professed his luv n promised 2 be by u).
4.u'll leave him and wouldnt find another man who is as gud as u think,or believe lucky ones got them all
5. u'll start prayer n fasting believing God wud giv u another,but at the end of the day believing the only gud male is the pastor on the alter hence always going for family counseling with your pastor
6.u'll work on your temper,jealous self,accept him or someone else,but from the start be dedicated in your relationship(dedication I mean nt in making meals or doing dishes,but by defining the type of man u want and if u feel the one u have can be mended by u to fit into your ideal man,u do that,that is 1 of d essence of dates & courtship,have common grand for communication, satisfy him and make him focused at satisfying u too, let him understand he’snt if u think he’s not, after all that is one way to tell him he’s bothered at a point in life if he has started loosing touch).

In all, modify all the opinion u have gotten and make the best…u didn’t have the ability to deal with it nicely, we cant give u 100% of all u need from us…it’ll still need u to make d decision

@all: all the poster needed was HELP, not you all coming on here, trade to show your skill on how u despise males/females….you can never know what it means to be a female even if you have one as a wife for 200yrs same way no female knows what it means to be a male…I bet you…u DO NOT…just like being a ga-y,les-b or bi-se*.This competition b/w both se*/x abt who is worse,am I the only one seeing its not helping?, everyday I see an old man/woman…I could read b/w their stare …”I wish I had another/better life”…comments here are too baised,we must make every effort to stick to that n saying things dat are dirty at the other bcz he/she does nt believe in your opinion…how does it serve a GOOD purpose?

My opinion in all these is : let us each face his/her own marriage, am sure there are always disagreements(little) and we take care of them together as a family
All I see here is everyone having this vision about other marriages, white husbands being better, Nigerian men having ego, Nigerian women being ungrateful, but my brothers and sisters, all you hear is what you are told, you can never know what happens in my home, not even 75% of what happened between your parents, you only heard and assumed some.
There are couples here who keep it the way they were in Nig and are happy but not that the woman has better rights here that is why but because even back in Nigeria, they both understand their success is theirs not measured by their measured contribution, there is no timetable of who picks kids,but as long as we gave birth to them,we owe them to take care of them and even go together to bring them back once in a while.They pay for cleaning services when one party is busy and the other doing most house duties,
Most people avoid looking at the equation of respect which runs the home after a while backed by love, believe me its not about Nigerian men or women, humans are just arrogant by nature and all we can do to survive if both parties are committed to it is to work towards it not looking at every woman from Nigeria coming to become arrogant or the man playing God, but to know our equation in our marriage is only ours and we alone can work out the unknown to eliminate them, dnt you see something is wrong in communication for the arguement to have gotten to "I have repayed you all the money you spent", how the hell did both allow their communication to break down to that?, how come he confids in you and got you to feel him and cannot use the same method to talk to her and convince her to see what he thinks and get her to talk and him listen to understand what she feels, thereby reaching a conclusion?
While we feel the whites are still enslaving us and detest us, we the blacks out here are actually the ones killing ourselves from so much unresolved issues back home, which naturaly two 8 year old friends resolve at school without the teacher noticing
the grace of God to make our homes excellent is just here, in us wasting

guess that is why we bear diff names, difference in opinion
but at the end, we both lookout for each other, that is the blood we have in our vain, that is brotherhood in diversity
nice talking with u all
nice we could hold diff opinion but never rude, I appreciate it

@Justwise:
I wouldn't admire anybody who got no respect for secret info that could endanger lives, whatever decison govt takes as a result of this will affect ordinary pple, if govt mis-manage, we the ordinary pple suffers it. As wikileak supporter attack Paypal and master card, everybody that uses those companies will suffer too. So lets wait and see how it turns out.

that's cool but from where I come from and belong,we prefer to tell your wife,how ur sergent under whom you are serving who is a gay,ordered you tired,slept with u and shot you dead, he was court marshaled n ur body flown home only to be told ur family that the Moslem Iraqis killed u on a patrol.

We love to see your wife and kid look at you as a hero you are to them not think you joined the force against their advice,

there maybe loses in our actions but its for the better good, and better than not done, the mastercard incident, who has lost money, name a client, since they do not want to host a good cause, why be online

everyday nations spy on u n ur country and you respect them, have no regard for u n ur secrets and u feel angry at the bad ones they have that some1 says, hey, look at what they've got, not fair
If you do not like us for what we do,live with it, the people that are affected do pray for us

@BIDEMI12: My guy spilling secrets is a dangerous game. How would you like it if someone broke into NL’s database and revealed your true identity for all to see. I bet you would not like it and probably be talking about suing the owner of NL Right?,  . . . . There is a reason these are called secret you know. . . . . . .
,
I do not say anything for anyone to believe or support me.
its my opinion Dear. if anyone breaks into NL and gets my identity, I'll not sue as there is a disclaimer by NL, that is a countermeasure , let the people affected show us what they have in place for such
there are no secrets my friend, someone knows, may be quiet or scared, but Assange is not that type n I admire him for that, someone will take his place anyday he leaves the scene, just like a leader, someone must wear that crown, live with it
the beauty of it is, while u are angry, nations are angry and making amends on policies based on the decision they took in respect of their people, the problem we both have is, being busy about if it was wrong or right, at the end, our comment ends in NL,

1. If he's charged with Espionage, it means the cables are real
2. He's not insane and knew what he was getting himself into before doing that
3. Kill a fighter and you will only end up raising 10 of him who believe in his cause (even with those that have better/worse ideal and method than his)
4. It's not a fight of making the world worse than they were after his release,but the world being reminded by that leak, that we call animals animals because we think they are animals but in real sense we are worse as in all the world gatherings and dealings there is no sincerity, now France can look at USA and defend why their fathers never wanted dealings with them and pulled out of NATO.Now Iran will realize its not about religion anymore but a sense of existence if the King of Saudi can advice the head of the serpent be cut off.
5.We in Nigeria now confirm those walls called embassies actually know more than an average Nigerian knows about his country where he is a citizen.

Let us not let anger make us loose the big picture, according to Assange, (implied), its better I let u know as u are better of than die not knowing what is wrong, at least that is what the doctor does diagnosing , he tells us how it is, shows u the scans and you accept to be treated,
the world should be looking at a way forward with such much facts on those cables instead of blaming the young man, he's one of my best friends and I love to say it, bcz

I Love to see a dying man know why he is dying than feeling lost on the way out,

You are intimidating him. I also think you only assumed to know him before ur marriage you did not really know him but its not late.(You started hating him after ur giving birth)
I'll try to be very objective as I do not see any reason why you are asking for an advice when you know your problem.
Fine he might he has lost his mind, he has lost track about life, but please tell us is that baby his?Don't U think he discovered something about you that made him loose the expectation he had from you infact he now sl**ps with U forcefuly like he is in a revenge mission, don't you see its like one night stand has taken hold of him.
You are successful but why not allow him be the man of the house since he wants to(and he is), minimize bringing business and career talk to the bed for now until he finds it interesting, go back to the way you both were before and few months into your marriage when you worshiped him and allowed him buy you most of the things you needed even though you had the money.
Did you make jest of his background joking? Did you joke about his pe**is to be small to his face? Did you tell him / anyone that he doesn’t satisfy U?
Did you tell him about ur past affair which involved ur corporate life? Do you have one? No reasonable man tells a half lie to the wife to her face like urs is doing, allowing you see the name saved and still telling U the text is a mistake. You are a female you could have gotten bacteria infection from any toilet
Find about his work problems without telling anyone there U are having issues and discus it with him(not letting him know U know).He might be a subordinate at the office and U are making him one at home by the way U treat him for some time now.
Did you refuse breast feeding ur baby when she was young and if U did how long, were you selfish at any instance? From all I can tell of him he is a sentimental type (this is not wrong because this is your marriage, if he does not have right to criticize you in whose marriage does he have right to?)
I think you fight more with him than talk, you tell him what you want to do than ask for permission to(why not lock up that supermarket and bring the key to him in the bedroom, ask him for permission to open a joint a/c for your children, talk about joint investment when U see his finance can carry it not when you want it.
Open up to him on ur finance(maybe you listen much to ladies who advice against, he is him not any other man and you have to understand what he appreciates same way you expect him to appreciate you and do what you like and do that)
This is ur marriage Honey and the right to win or lose is in ur hands, anyone here might advice otherwise but its ur home not mine, we all have challenges but we handle them that is why we still have a home(a lovely one),
Submit to him and bring him home(when a man/woman misses his/her way out there, we go back to the last known point, that’s what we teach our kids, and if they aren’t there, U wait there if they know the drill, if U feel they don’t U keep a notice there and go all the way searching.
If U do not take care of this ur way reasonably, (if U move out) give it 40yrs and come back to see that it was not about sex, U both lost it some place and needed to find each other.
You will forever be a failure if you think you are rite but cannot solve the problem, and if ur being right isn’t solving it, put urself in his shoes, you will know what to do.
We are Africans, solve ur problem, those countries with marriage councilors all other have highest no of divorce cases.He has not beaten U (that means he adores U)& if He has he regrets every minute of it…would cry apologizing the day U find him as a lovely wife would
Find ur man Dear