₦airaland Forum

location? how much? and please dont expect me to pay a dime without seeing the item

legendaryprime:
I have these smart watches for contact me via what's app on 07054029716

From another angle.
Respect

lenghtinny:
You are offended by Dice using her picture but una still dey call her "Sarah Baartman", a name which I'm 100% sure was given to her by the same white men that derided her....

Her story was tragic but I don't see Dice using her picture is a disrespect to her... She's indeed a symbol of an African woman figure, so Dice using that might be in order... Besides if Dice no use her picture now, many for no know her story this afternoon....

But seriously, Africans need to quit this victim mentality.... White peeps na racist goats, but we Africans should stop crying like babies and turn around and embrace whatever other races sees as flaws because no race is flawless...

Everybody get hin own for body....

Bro my own love for yansh is outta this world.

ProfessorBerlin:
Where the devil cannot go, he send a woman with big nyash.
I like nyash Sha. I fit die for nyash.
if u know u love girls with nice nyash hit LIKE

Let me leave you with a secret
Life in banks' headoffices is not hellish like in the branches.

Ciao!!

DNSPro:
I will rather be jobless than take a bank job.

Exactly what my nigga used to say before he heard my testimonies. I know he's silently praying he gets one now.
It all depends on your department and the kinda boss you have.

DNSPro:
I will rather be jobless than take a bank job.

LOL come see hundreds of the holes adjacent eric moore road leading to Nigerian breweries.
Fear grip me when dem commot two covers for eko bridge, leaving the large pits bare and uncovered, one could see the aggressive river torrents by peeping through those holes and they were on the highway.

5
sense don kee u finally

utimichael:
Top 10 jokes
1. Dating A Slim Guy is very
Sexy and Romantic, until Breeze
blows him away from the
Relationship

2. I hate people who don't
forget the past. Especially this
woman am owing
money

3. Yoruba boys be like "Aunty,
give me 'Empty Hen' Biko its
MTN, don't let me faint the
second time oh

4. Since I borrowed N200 from
MTN last month, they keep
sending me message that
“Recharge with N200 to win 7
houses at Lekki” They think I
don’t have sense

5. I fooled a keke man today I
paid him and ran away without
entering his keke; Sense no go
kee me

6. Some naija guyz sha, If U
don't have anything to say, just end the Chat with her already .
Which one is "What is Ur
favorite age?"

7. Those guys that use 5 secs to
UnCloth a girl in the dark and
can't open psalm 23 in broad day light, come and enter
Heaven lemme see you

8. The way I’m broke these days
sef, it’s like I’ll sell my neighour’s
dog and do the barking at night

9. don’t trust girls that visit with large hand bags. I have lost
my phone, charger and Tv
remote. Please if you know any
girl called stella tell her to
bring back my ceiling fan blades.
The room is hot

10. Which number make you laugh the most

I no even why I come choose today of all days for fasting....

So because I decided to help your gf and her momma cos they both have big a$$ and I hate to choose(I always take them all), you decided to bite the hands relieving you of intense financial duties by broadcasting me on social media. No Wahala! my God is bigger than you. PM me your aza with your side chic's full picture(showing explicitly her ass-ological framework)

lol...don't be scared! Not all lunatics bite u know?

RedCreme21:
Why you disturbing me? I've typed down the moniker. Check him out.
((He's taken though))

Share your unclad pics here and we'll take you seriously.

If this man could get himself a hot chic, I have hope

Every moniker above me is useless...See them stampeding for FTC

Use kick and start, early in the morning before food, viagra in the night before bed.

You are welcome

GREATZEAL:
Thanks for your kind reply.. I will do just that..

Firstly, this thread is as old as your left balls, ain't nobody sleeping on a random thread, are you high or something?

Secondly, you need to read through an old thread to see the back and forth between commentators before you crawl outta your hole and jump on it like a hor.ny frog.

Thirdly, the op is not happy about it, so why did he tolerate what was gonna put him in a dicey situation in the first place?

AND lastly who da fuq are you? some simp?

degamemaster:
You said little or nothing except blaming the guy and speaking jargons. The guy is in a mess emotionally, the girl is not contented but in all these, the ex might be innocent of any negative intention. Go straight to the point and stop blabbing. I am saying this because I'm in same situation but as the ex. Be nice and simple,people are going through different issues.

LOL...Nothing is wrong with you, Your dick is exhausted from the hectic working conditions that your chic must have put it under. I put it to you today, that your sexual drive is a bit low! While you up your feeding game, go buy 'kick and start' (#250) from local jedi vendors, then a card of viagra (#200) from any pharmacy store and your problem is history.

Signed.
Daddy G.O
Monkey-Tail Better Life Ministries

Never use Nipost unless you have about 2 months ahead deadlines

demigod9:
Has anyone sent documents from Abuja to Germany through Nipost recently? What's the estimated charge because I was shocked today. I read somewhere on this thread that Nipost to Germany for document will cost about 1k or less.

But I went to send two set of documents today, one to Uni-assit and the other to Uni Augsburg, I was given the price as #4150 and #3750 respectively that's #7900 total for slow mail, while fast mail will be around #12450 and 13k each.

I didn't go with enough money and them no use Pos, I just have forget about sending for today.

Back in primary school, Modinat would always come to our house with the excuse of coming to copy my notes in the evening, I'd tell her to come indoors but would insist she preferred us to stay outdoors, specifically inside my dad's space bus that looked like the interior of an old plane, she'd wear clothes revealing her pimples-like brezz with her legs widely opened in a bid to showcase what was in the skirt while she did justice to her notes. My innocence never for once made me think she was up to something until she seduced me when we were adults, then all the childhood drama started to make sense.

Another new classmate back in primary one would force me to dip my fingers into her private parts, enveloped with a threat that her dad would bring the police to our house to arrest my dad and I if her request wasn't met. The whole session was a depressing one as I was totally living in her bondage, I could have sworn the only thing she left out was hanging a leash on my neck with shackles round my ankles, having to finger a hot tight kitten anytime the class teacher stepped out plus letting her copy everything I wrote in tests and exams for us to score the same marks.....If she ever scored lower, my fingers sufferred for it. I was scared to tell anyone cos I couldn't imagine sirens blowing up at our luxury flat back then. It went on and on until her dad wasn't able to meet up with her school bills the next session.

Our housemaid would punish my bro and I using the push-up techniques, she would make us pump series of distorted push-ups, then call us in one by one into my mom's room to practise the same push-up we just did on her, She would moan softly while she fondled her breast as my pointing dick woud brush against her pelvic region, I later learnt about the clitoral stimulations when I grew all up.

I have more stories but I'm tired of typing, I don't trust kids.......My childhood has inspired my scepticism about kids' innocence.....
WATCH YOUR KIDS!!! THEY KNOW MORE THAN YOU THINK.

Okro soup in the white land is a foreign delicacy and hence, it may be pocket-tearing!! Just like a bowl of Asian noodles at 'China Garden' , Adeniran Ogunsanya, Surulere attracts nothing lesser than 15k from your wallet.
''A prophet is never honoured in his homeland''

what part of lagos?

Zillion2019:
Hotel Deal in Lagos,
Who needs a hotel in lagos, nice serene area, perfect place to chill out with friends, outside the city, get a deal , pay for 3 days, at 11k instead of 18k.
Terms and conditions apply. Send me a pm. Complimentary drinks also come with the offer. Only three rooms left

(true story)

MrCork:
...ok although am from london, am a playA.. Technicaly, this mean my job is to chase married women, single women, lightskin women & most importantly...HALF women.

Next week I shall be teaching technicks of how to kiss them.... THANK ME LATER!!!!

Now this is the most embarassing of all I have seen today

Kelvin30286063:
I never thought I'll never share my own cuz I don't want to remember it but I will. Maybe sharing it will help me heal from that painful embarrassment.
We were suppose to have this group presentation at 300L and as always I was group leader. Naturally group leaders will present the topic to the class and the lecturers and the lecturer in charge of the course will award mark to everyone in the group based on the group's performance in the presentation and individual contribution to the assignment.
I don't have problem presenting, Infact I've done that all my school years. I was always group leader so I always present except if the lecturer opted otherwise but that particular course was not my favorite and I don't know nada in it. Infact I hated it so much that I only pick the note whenever I'm trying to sleep and it's not coming. I'll start reading it then sleep go catch me.

Knowing fully well that I was going to present the topic, I decided to cheat. What I did was simple (or so I thought until everything scattered) I recorded all the presentation paper on my phone, bought an earphone and thought to myself that I'll just play it and listen to it while I repeat after it.
To be fair, I practiced it at home several times that I had even memorized all the words and I should have just used that but I was bent on doing what I planned.
D-day came, class was full cuz presentation is always like a test. The marks are awarded and they represent your test.
I got to the stage and played the recording (did as if I wanted to adjust my phone)
Na so wahala start oo. Lecturer was like... What's the topic of your group... (recording don dey play oo)
I said it, I listen, record don go pass introduction, na so I start to dey stammer.
I should have just removed the earpiece from my ears and see if I'll remember some of the words I memorized when I was practicing my scam but I was bent on catching up with this God forsaken recording that was playing so fast.
At a point, I thought of reaching out to my pocket and pausing it a little so I can catch my breath but already everybody was looking at me with shock written all over their faces and taking out my phone was a bad idea.
Everything just scatter. Luckily, one of the group members noticed that I wasn't myself, he quickly took it from me and started explaining the topic. He should have been made the group leader sef since that was he favourite course but na so dem think say na Kelvin fit do am...

Last last, after presentation, the lecturer looked at me and was like, what is wrong with you?
I said nothing sir. He said then that nothing almost cost your group 30 marks. Everybody in class bursted into laughter.
Funny enough, the recording was still playing, how it manage to still be playing when presentation has ended is what baffled me. I must have recorded it really slowly that even if I was repeating after it, I would have sounded like a big fool.

Hey mate!
Never ever blame your parents the way they live their lives even if you are affected, what matters the most is the way you live yours.
Let nobody decide your fate.....Take charge NOW!!!!

ChildOfDoom:
struggling in vain because they couldn't pave the way for me

I was in my finals!
It had been almost a year that I dumped my ex and few other side chics, so I was single and celibate to the letter at the moment cos I already had a new found love 'liquor. Ice!! Ice!! Oye woke me from my nap, I just finished a series of tedious lecture sessions as it was the beginning of the session, when students would pretend to be serious before laziness and social activities on campus would snatch their lion shares of the session. 'How far naa!!' I mumbled from my slumber, 'I don get babe for you, make you nor go turn gay for room, I dey fear for my yansh', Oye announced as he was the kinda real nigga that always got a hommie's back any day at any time, he was quite aware that I hadn't smashed any coochie for donkey years, so he had a spot on moment with a new babe (alledgedly most beautiful) in the faculty and thought he could give me heads up as he already knew my typpa spec.

Furthermore, local man had no choice than to oblige since niggas around were already doubting my current sexuality as at that moment, so i gave Biodun(faculty gen sec) a call to inquire about the babe and as a 'woman wrapper' that he always had been, he had her contact, which he didnt hesitate to share with me with a warning that time must not be wasted on the babe as she's got a long queue of potential suitors in and out of campus, like he was her coochie manager or something. Without further ado, I placed a confident call and fronted the conversation with my bullish voice, Hey! I am Ice-money,..........
To be continued later, wanna clear a few request on my table.

Abraka ogberagas....Minguwo oooo

Have you done your home econs assignment?

Ipob pigs

I was faced with the same problem when I started working!
Here are some tips that helped me out (I'm still struggling though, but much better than before)

For Subhi
I assume you wake early, perform ablution after having your early morning bath while you are still in the bathroom.
Dedicate a minute or two to perform the subhi rakats immediately after you are dressed.

For Zhuri
I assume you work, locate a praying ground close to where you have your lunch, so you pray on your way to get some lunch. (Use the lunch as the reward for solat)

For Asri
Take a stroll to the mosque/praying ground to while away time as work closing hour is approaching.

For Mahgrib and Ishaa
These are the hardest cos you may be on your way home and return tired!!
If you are the cooking type pray while dinner is on fire, to give the food some time to get done, otherwise, pray after your shower just before bedtime, it gives you a sense of relief and peace of mind of a spiritually accomplished day.
I hope my assertions help
Barakallahu Fih!!

Lol My deen is not that strong ooo, I'm still struggling to balance my worldly with spritual life!!

rashrockalabx:
I find it somehow difficult to pray 5times daily..which have been trying to fight against..cuz it's not my wish...I feel like shaitan is taking over my mind...pls Muslim brothers and sisters.....need ur prayers ND advice

Nah I ceased doing that a long time ago

RedCreme21:
stop watching that comedy series

You dey write letter to yourself....You even put 'hello ma'
And you day wait make i click....................