₦airaland Forum

H-e-e-y  K-a-n-d-y, ^{still angry with me}?    How are you?

Donlittle:
A MAN GATS TO DO WATS HE HAS TO DO TO SURVIVE
HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE

HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE(DRUGS) + PRISON or (even death) = Foolishness
And your friends out there are slowly making a living, putting pennies and cents together and breathing the sweet air of freedom. I'd rather be alive struggling than ( be rich and dead or waste away in prison) that way I can still get rich or die wisely trying.

Did I hear somebody mention "ladies sitting on t*ilet seats"? Who still sits on t*ilet seats meant for the public, be it at work, offices, malls or other places? I don't ever sit on such, I almost stand (bend a little  ) to do my thing. How can you sit on a place others splash pee on and sit on, that may even contain millions of germs? I saw a woman sit on that to pee at my place of work and I was horrified, it is true that t*ilet seats are meant for the comfort of sitting while doing "nature's call" yet I don't think it is a good idea for person after person after person to be sitting and messing an[/color]d twinkling pee on it, me ain't sitting on no t*ilet seat meant for all and sundry! Ouch!    You are better off seated comfortably on your own clean t*ilet seats than on public ones.

@Poster
You said that the lady has been going for the treatment and operations for an ectopic pregnancy. Is she still pregnant now? Why is that lady playing with her life? Ectopic pregnancies are delicate-o-o! [color=#000099]I know a lady that died while being operated on her ectopic pregnancy. Please persuade her to go to the right places for her ailments even if you are done with her okay, you can still support her while she is going through all that. Don't just dump her and run away from her. I mean don't get intimate with her for now unless she gets treated, heals properly and you still want to go along with the marriage. All in all still be there for her to give her moral support.

190:
Whoops posted the wrong post on the wrong thread, editing right now----------

I beat you to that boy!
See I am done editing--------

190:
[size=20pt]AMEN!!

UNA DON HEAR AMEN!![/size]

Bless you 190! Glory to God Alleluiah! It looks like I am in the spirit right now.    Senteribobo Nebosk and even speaking in tongue. Alleluiah! 

It's high time the youths of Nigeria know that swallowing drugs and cocaine in the desperation to be rich and (adored by some "money-worshipping" Nigerians) kills. I know a certain Naija man that died last month from drugs he swallowed, it affected his organs and had him vomitting blood through his mouth and nose before he finally died. This able- bodied young man that was full of life the other day was cargoed back to Nigeria in an air plane the very way they cargo goods. He was buried in the uncompleted house he was building in the village, okay now house is still standing there to be occupied by others while he is buried underneath. It makes no sense dearies!

My fellow young men and women work your hard, remove desperation and competition from your life and there won't be need to go to extremes to make money. Just do your thing, work hard and God will bless the works of your hand. Alleluiah, Amen Somebody! 

@Poster
Concentrate on treating your self right now okay. Is there a way you can make that lady stop being ignorant in patronizing the white garments church when she should be receiving treatment from a gynaecologist/doctor, I am not saying that you continue getting intimate with her as you guys need serious treatment right now.
It is true she wronged you but for friendship sake help her get the help she needs. Untreated STDs are dangerous, she needs to rid her body of that disease. This is proof that it is very wise for couples to go for test and treat any of such diseases (if any) before marrying, now what should have been done at first (going for test) is being done last. I wish you quick recovery, Ojare.

[quote author=Shy-One link=topic=706682.msg8663522#msg8663522 date=1309967385]@ Ivynwa - ok - i will - later today - is that alright? If you are in Lagos - you are 5 hours difference from me

@ Chief - thank you - i really hope you are right[/quote]Aight

@Shy-one
Nne sorry to hear about the death of your first husband. It must be hurting bad. Accept my sympathy.

andromida:
The heart of man is desperately wicked. Could the guy be insane? do good husbands just turn bad or good boyfriends become killer husbands for financial reasons? i still cant believe its just because he was jobless and frustrated.

It sounds more like frustration from the unemployment and cashlessness mixed with plenty jealousy for only a feeling that negative can move him to that point. If he had a clear mind devoid of any bad feeling frustration alone will not have moved him to that point.
A woman sacrifices that much to make him happy and he is just not happy that she has to give unlike him. Complicated insecurites and complex here. Now that she is dead, is he happy? Vanities and the people that kill themselves over the passing things of this world. He even forgot that someday he too will die. He only hastened the woman's death at his own detriment because someday we all will pass away.

Great job from Mr. Loma and his Dayokanu, (Agaba and TinTin  group of friends - guess Agaba and Tintin are happy now  ). It's nice that you guys have the good heart to think of bringing development/enlightenment to the doorstep of other Africans on benefitting from the technologies and good life in your country of residence. Bravo!
Is the voting as mentioned in the other post still on so that we can support you guys or has it closed/have you guys won already?

Ranoscky:
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If you know u cannot bear such, the BEST solution for u is to divorce your wife and move on with your life. DONT KILL !!!

Hey , I had exactly that statement in my last post but deleted it because I didn't want to be the one telling a man to divorce his wife. I decided to give Dude a little compassion as that seems to be what he needs from us. I hope he gets through this.

Alright Islamy, sorry about that okay. It's nice you accepted that the username needs changing. If we all go about screaming "paganismrules ", "christianityrules" our world will become a religious mad house as some people already wrongly have as a concept with our innocent sisters and brothers being maimed ad killed as a result of that concept that is just all I have against that. We should be tolerant of one another's religious belief not breathing down on others that ours must dominate all others.

If you read my comment concerning your post what I was indirectly telling you is that you steer away from such people that are messing around and not go down to their levels much more allow them tempt you into committing a sin that may boomerang on you later on. Simply cut connections from that lady and it won't hurt you who she chooses to be sleeping around with, that way your life is clean and free from diseases that she may give you.

@Enkidu
You really sound very deeply affected by this and seriously contemplating to kill, the many posters that have told you not to kill gave you good advice. Take that advice okay, find a way to get that dangerous feeling out of your heart even if it means taking a break or a holiday away somewhere with your family. How about also distancing yourself miles away from that man so that you won't have to see him again, flee from temptation please.

Find it in you to close that chapter and forgive her so you won't have to hurt anymore okay Baby. What are the things you like most that makes your heart happy, do them. Make yourself happy, vindictiveness and feelings of hatred are not good for you. Save yourself from that animalistic side of man that is trying to ride above your reasonings, you are an evolved human being, ain't you?
I want to send you this songs to listen to, they are songs have cooling effects on the heart and seeks strength from God. You seem to be a moslem, I would have sent you a good islamic song if I know any but I don't. Don't get offended that I sent you a christian song and don't take on the song if you don't want to, just allow it douse your heart while lying down, it can give you a little comfort.

[flash=425,344]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVVW5EakyEc?version=3&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="480" height="385"[/flash]


[flash=425,344]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjBBzQBK7po?version=3&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="480" height="385"[/flash]

@Poster
What you are telling us without knowing it is that you came across a certain gutter persons wallowing in the gutter and asking us for the permission to join them in the gutter medley. If wallowing in gutter and stinking miry clay pleases you wallow along but please leave your innocent neighbour's daughter out of it, failure to do so may result in a stink that may swallow you up along with your gutter friends. Ouch!

By the way has anybody told you that a person with that username of yours has a wack mentality? The type of mentality that is brewing all the troubles in our world today, how about saving us the disgrace of that username of yours and also saving your fellow moslems the embarrassment that their brother is filled with such hatred and vindictiveness as you are expressing here. I am wondering who you think you are intimidating here with that username? Excuse us! Mtcheeeeew!

This thread seems to be the same with this (https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=589982.msg8626708#msg8626708) as the spouses in both are worried about communication between their spouse and their exes. It is also an example of my stance that good exes can still be good friends that can innocently help each other in times of need. Do one really need to cut all relationship with people they have been with in the past because one got married? It doesn't even sound good coming from the poster that she threatened the husband to stop communicating with the ex, that may have the man feeling like he just got locked up behind the four walls of his home. It's just like telling a man "Now that you are married to me, I don't want you talking to Miss A or Miss B" That doesn't sound nice.

This ex of your husband can still be any other married lady out there seeking advice on her marriage from your husband. In as much as I agree that a woman should have her eyes open lest another woman uses pity to cunningly draw her husband away, it doesn't make sense to cut communication with exes (you still relate with on a platonic level after the end of the relationship not exes that want you back and are making moves on you that are not healthy to your marraige) or mandate your spouse/be mandated by your spouse to do so. It is the taking away of the freedom to relate from others.

It is not worth it to have the death of another on your conscience forever, you may even end up languishing in prisons for years so why throw your life away?

Wait, did you say you were abroad for some years? Next time you have to be away for that length of time plan to be with your family, its not good for families to be apart for years. In some cases like that the spouses lose themselves to other people and the marriage gets broken. I have seen a husband that went abroad for years and left wify home only for him to make off with another woman and send message home for wify to find her levels and look for another husband, it sounds funny but it's not.

You guys are still lucky to have each other back after such long separation. Find it in you to forgive your wife, the hurts are still lurking in your heart. Discuss it out with your wife perhaps that may lighten your heart and make you feel better, you guys should work at renewing the love in your marriage. Pains like that may be hard to fade away but if old things are allowed to pass away for all things to become new, it may hurt less.

Omo see tummy-o-o!
The tummy is looking like it reached its elastic limit , isn't God wonderful? Her babies are cute, abeg what are they talking about? They should extend the stay for that lady so that those babies can blossom out a bit, its delicate to fly with the bunch of them. I hope one or two companies or philanthropists can bless her and her babies with some goodies that can ease things for her. It's a thing of joy that they are hale and hearty.

Topic: Would He Marry Me If I  Hav An Abortion For Him?

Jenonye:
Can a guy who I hav had an abortion for want to marry me in the future?he says he loves me but is scared of gettin married to me, he can't say y

@Jenonye
Nne, your topic is asking a different question from the question in the body of your post. Check the two out and put them in order so that people can understand and advise you well, you seem to be a young lady that needs to be directed aright.
In the the topic you asked whether your guy will marry you if you have an abortion for him (this is what confused people and had them wondering whether you are pregnant and planning to abort for him), in your main post you asked whether a guy you have already had an abortion for will want to marry you. The two questions are not the same thing, I hope you understand?

Your main post seem to suggest more that you have already had the abortion in the past and now he is saying that he is scared of marrying you. If that is so, seriously have a discussion with him and tell him that you need to know what his fears about marrying you are and if he refuses to tell you, you don't need anybody to tell you to stop wasting your time with him.

Note that having abortion is not the best thing for you, you can develop problems that may prevent you from having kids and problems that may even lead to your death above all abortion is the killing of another human being not even another person but your own child.You need to take control of your body, an unmarried person has all the ability and will to stay away from sex if she/he decides to do that so it is not impossible to abstain. If you decide not to abstain you have to be using birth control if you don't want to be getting impregnated and aborting and risking your health and life. If you don't know about birth controls, see a doctor/nurse or mature adult that is versed in that so that they can explain it well to you. If the abortion is the cause of his fear over marrying you, run miles away from him and stop taking those dangerous risks, this experience should wisen you up a bit. Ask yourself whether aborting is worth it if the man that impregnanted you can turn around and detest you for it?

What are you doing with a man that is scared of marrying you? Please find out what is going in his mind and the moment you do, respect yourself and leave. Don't stick to the guy and be waiting for him to change his mind or even go crying that you can't live without him. You don't have to grovel to a person that does not appreciate you, you can meet another person that appreciates you much tomorrow so don't waste your time waiting for a man that is scared of marrying you and isn't saying what is scaring him.

Genius100:
With the kind of nonsense you've been yanning here, no wonder you have a second husband already. I bet he is one of those mugu guys who takes all the rubbish from his wife and suffers in silence. Very soon, he will reach his limit. Then you can go look for your third husband.

There is nothing as ugly and timid as nairalanders using delicate and close hearted stuffs people shared in the forum to hurl insult at them at will , these are the same multifaceted people that must have given their "I-am-wiser-and more-fulfilled-than-all" advice to the same persons when they were sharing their thoughts in the past.
I am wondering the kind of a man that can say such gutter dirt above to a woman? If that woman you are talking down on was beaten to death by her first husband and a thread was opened on that like this one (https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-701925.0.html that is currently making waves here), people can only say RIP.
This woman you are degrading like this still gathered her self esteem to make a new life for herself and she is being given bitter/foul-hearted mouth. The unfeeling people of this world!  Huh
Some people come to nairaland to spit venoms and acid on others without knowing that all they are revealing are the biles/bitterness/complexes and fears that are lurking in their hearts and seeking to escape, little wonder they vent it on others.  I admire brave women that walked out of abusive marriages to start better lives for themselves, they are great inspirations to the millions of invincible women being slowly beaten to death by their partners in every nooks and crannies of our world especially those in countries like ours (that look down on divorced women) that can't find the courage to leave because of what people will say. It's high time people learn to treasure the quality/health/safety of their lives above bitter talks of bitter-hearted people.

I was holding my breath for the people standing by that road side until the end of the video, it was when I heaved a huge sigh and heaved down that I understood how much the video has affected me.
Somehow I knew that they are going to get crushed and it happened, how in the world can a sane person stand on that road with that unorganized mad people car race going on there. Racing can be sweet when organized and planned, Oh my God anybody that watches "Amazing videos" should know that you are not even safe trekking along the road side cos anything can happen.

@Poster
Sweetie pull yourself together because your baby needs you now, your husband equally needs you too. Perhaps he is yet to adjust to the arrival of a baby in your union and may be detesting that you devote a greater part of your time with the baby and none with him. He is being a bit selfish though wanting to still be rolling as normal when you guys should have your hands full with trying to look after the baby so that it can grow out of its fragile state. Draw him close to you again, call him home and communicate to him, explain to him that he needs to start adjusting to the baby and that the baby needs you guys to help him/her blossom out a bit before you can start leaving it alone (with another suitable person) to go out with him.

Find a way to meet him half way okay, you can recreate the "hanging out" scene in your home, say by having a barbeque evening or a "bar scene" in the open air with him once in a while in your back yard/garden or garage with music. Just find a way to make him feel at least a bit like he use to feel when it was just the two of you, the sudden change must have hit him hard. It seems you have two babies on your hand now. Lol  

@Poster
Am I missing something here? I mean I have been searching and searching to see the unfaithfulness/deceit/cheating committed by the posters wife and couldn't find any. I can only hear talks of deceits and cheating and DNA test and sleeping with members of her family to get back at her(old boy take am easy-o-o wetin?) just because a woman saved her ex's number on her phone with another ID perhaps to avoid making her husband (who she knows better than us posters  ) jealous. ^{I mean the fierceness of the temper being displayed here is enough attestation to how afraid of you she must be.} Chineke Umunwanyi mere anyi ebere (the God of women have mercy on us women!)

This woman did not do anything wrong mister, yes she hid it from you but that is not enough to say that she is being unfaithful. You should have  played smart like Miss Pslm mentioned she did or find another way to get an evidence of unfaithfulness before breathing down on her as you have done.
There are people out there having great innocent family friendly relationship with their spouse's ex, living life and being happy(I mean ex-es that are good and are not unhealthy to the union or still eyeing one of the spouse and wanting to get back) .
One can still have a good friendship devoid of physical contact with ones's ex. We all are the world and the children of the world. You never know what great problem an ex you are in good terms with can help you and your husband or wife sort (I'm not referring to financial related problems). If everybody cuts off communication with exes the world may become one hell of a malicious place, huh!   

smootheb:
You are right, it's definitely putting too much of the control over what happens in his hands. Never tried birth control because I have heard that it causes side effects, weight gain, etc. But probably the pill is the way to go though I think he'll be against it because he swears he knows what he is doing, [[size=20pt]but I need to be in control of what happens to my body.

[/size]

Smart girl there! I think you just said it all "you really need to be in control of what happens to your body". Most women have changed the course of their lives by giving out such control in mistakes and such always have one unhappy story or the other to go with it. Your side of the story is not enough for one to conclude that he is merely trying to validate your fertility before marrying you as some men seem to believe in. ^{(Now I don't want to agitate my naija brothers, abeg free me-o-o, I no put Naija-men for that statement)}
It could be that he is having baby blues, I have seen men that have baby blues like us women and yearn to have kids either from their heart or through pressures from his people. All in all the most important thing here is for you to get to know yourselves and your compatibility levels and if the two of you really want to marry, you can wed and have children if you both want that too.