₦airaland Forum

If the marriage is between a 28 year old and a 46 year old not 18 and 36 years,i'd be more comfortable as the level of maturity would be vastly different.
I definitely would not advise any 18 year old to run and marry especially with such an age gap.What does she know?The man is in a completely different level from her and i'm generally very skeptical of this sort of arrangement.Is it that he did not see anyone closer to his age or is he hunting for a naive person he can control and impose his ideas on?
If she insists,you wish her good luck..She may be happy,,she may gnash her teeth bin pain either ways she will carry her cross.
Anything above 10 years to me cries of looking for father figure..Is she from a loving home? Is she close to her dad? Is she missing the love of a father and trying to replace with the man?
She should focus on her education please and start forging a life for herself before taking this kind of decision.
Just my opinion,i could be wrong.
Good luck.

Why should they not flee? Why should they sacrifice their lives like that to please the same people who would turn on them at the drop of a hat if they asked for better pay and better working conditions?
In a sane clime,the hospital should have a unit specially dedicated to patients who might come in with the illness,plus proper protective clothing for the health workers and also training done for the medical staff on the protocol to follow when handling such a scenario.

So let's say they die after rushing to the patient and being selfless,is there any insurance cover for them,will any one care for their families?If they do a funding drive to help the family will you donate??

If it's me I will FLEE and not go near unless i have the complete protective gear.

Why people pounced on the Op is cos he sounded like his wife wanted to rip him off.Maybe he's a tight wad.
If you can afford only 10k on your baby,spend it happily and don't act like you are doing anyone a favour.It's your kid!!
There's space for all levels on income in this world to care for their babies and spend whatever they want.
If you cannot afford much,buy quality stuff to the BEST of your ability,then pick up the rest small small.Quality over quantity any time so you don't have to keep buying over and over and end up spending more.
Babies no matter what come with their own expenses,the sooner you start warming up and accepting your fate,the better.Yeah while at it,use a condom so you don't have a heart attack induced by another pregnancy.

Good luck to you and wifey.

^^
Welcome to nairaland.
If you are not planning poverty stricken wedding,poverty stricken budget for your home,poverty stricken stuff for your new born baby,you get slated.People tend to forget that it's a wide demographic,different people,different backgrounds.
Your 900k will be a budget wedding for some people,however you can also indulge some others and also cater to 5k wedding.Nothing wrong with that in itself.Just stick to what's available to you and leave those that want to spend 20 million alone.Not a crime.
Soon someone wil jump in and say he planned wedding for 200 people with 1k.

@Op,if you insist you want to work what will she do?You cannot just be there watching unfortunately.You may have to talk to her reasonably and say you know it's been difficult for her to help with the fees and you appreciate it but that you are a man and want to work to sort your fees out then take it from there.That you will still help out where you can but finishing your education is important to you.
Pele oo.

@ amunkita
think you are stuck with the name,you can't change it.

@blessedtwins
How are things with you now? Have you escaped? I normally just silently read your comments and say a prayer for you that you get out of that situation.This is 2016 abeg,time to be free.I wish you all the best.

Plenty of your mates have forgiven and will keep.forgiving cheating wives.
Go and work on your marriage o jare,at least you are lucky that the bulala was a 'holy' one.

She did what she had to do..that's life.

Nice username@ amunkita.
How pesin go name himself that kain name? Nawa oga,I bow oo!!

They will grow orange trees on their heads.
Wtf? Will sperm climb to breast milk? Abi now she had a baby it will be leaking from her ears?
Nawa o. You should be using a con dom as extra protection just incase.Even though breast feeding acts as a form.of contraception you cannot be sure.

Nothing to complain about,do me I do you.Daz all

Buhahahahahahahaa
Nice to see man vs man for a change.
If it was the wife now we for no hear word.

Op funny enough you are in the same boat as your inlaw(unemployed), you'd better reduce your scorn before you end up suffering the same fate.

The man is probably not happy to have a witness to his domestication..as per his cooking and cleaning of the home while your sister brings home.the bacon and ontop.of it they are TTC. He shouldn't be ashamed o jare,its called stay at home.husband and he's obviously keeping up his end of the bargain by tending to the home.

Don't go and destroy happy/semi happy home my friend.I see his unbelieving corrupt music listening personality is giving you sleepless nights..Pele o.
As long as you are there,you have to pitch in or get out.2 of you should ensure your sister comes back to a house that is clean and welcoming, all.this power tussle won't be helping her state of mind at all.

Please, respect yourself and wash the plates.

Different strokes, different folks.Depends on where you are from.and who you roll with.
This 900k wedding may not be up to standard for.some and it may also appear astronomical for another set as evidenced by the comments here.

Everyone cut your coat to your size.If you want luxury wedding,this 900k one isn't appealing,if you are in the middle,this option may seem okay to you.If you earn 10k per month,its obviously not for you.

Small beginning (20,000 naira wedding),big beginning (10,000,000 naira wedding )isn't recipe for success of a marrriage. Simple.Just mind your own corner and be happy,just match up with someone who shares your taste and is of the same class with you.Poverty or riches isn't the definer of whether your marriage will succeed or not.I.know where I'd choose though if it were me.

Always Nigerians living in England..I think London area popular for this sort of dirt slinging.
I'm sure if you check d background before coming to the UK,same ol gutter behaviour from Naija and no wanting to improve.

Avoid at all costs..don't mix with such people cos they'll drag you down to the same level.

Tueh.

Unfortunately Op,you seem to be unable to absorb what everyone here is telling you.Maybe because you are upset.
You seem to believe she's not paying the fees on purpose and she's holding you back,using you as a houseboy.Seems all the help you were rendering at home was just because she was paying your fees and now she's unable to keep up,she's now a demon.

I don't think you know.it,but you are coming across as an entitled ingrate and you are only going to wind up on a slippery slope going further down if you continue with this attitude. Don't use your hand to block yourself.

Isn't this the woman you were praising a while back? What if she's in difficulty? If you know you could sort yourself out why didn't you do it since instead of saddling her with your fees?? Many relatives would do much less for you.Have you asked her if shed facing difficulties? Have you appealed to her sense of mercy and fairness? With the way you are coming across I see why anyone would be reluctant to even help. Let me just believe it's your way of writing.

The fact that your father trained her is meaningless or was he training her to prepare her to train you too??I'm sure she remembered how your dad helped her and that's why she of her own accord took you in and all you can spew now is bad stuff.

Advice yourself my dear and tell all those putting bad thoughts into your head to get behind you.

If she's no longer able to keep up.with the fees something must have changed and that's what should be of concern to you..alleviating her stress and also helping her to see helping you as a priority.

Good luck,you'd best listen to what people who have been in your situation and even worse have been telling you up on this thread.

@yebo36

E be like say fear don enter your body

What is the real definition of marriage?It is whatever you want your marriage to be,what your vision is.Only you can decide that and make it what you want it to be.Remember what works for A may not work for B so looking at other people may send you to an early grave.Its better you and your spouse do whats best for both of you and forget conforming to what society has said marriage must be.

That is why I presented an alternative for you,if you are both willing to open your minds and forget set roles.Your husband has refused to work,if you like fast and pray,if you like nag till your eyes fall out,he will only do what he wants.Youve even tried starvation,where has it led you?

See eh,why will you allow anyone to give you premature high bp or cause you to grow grey hair for no just cause.The fact is you are giving yourself excess stress with all the nagging and anger while he's balancing and enjoying the good life.Very soon you will start looking like his mother while he's fresh like tomato.

This whole energy you are expending trying to deal with him is better spent on updating your skills,starting a biz for yourself and trying to build a safety net for you and the kids.

Since he's happy being at home,he should be doing chores and taking care of the kids without complaining while you are hustling.If he doesn't like that style,he should get a job.My point is give him something to do - tending to the home is not easy,with all the cleaning cooking and washing to do.There's no point in him being at home totally useless and jobless ontop..Let him do the homefront to keep busy. Ofcourse you will be giving him pocket money for all his efforts OR at the end of the month you both balance the family books and then you each get at least 500 naira for beer and nkwobi.

You may make peace with this sort of lifestyle if you are open to it.Some modern marriages run this way without wahala.If you look around you,you will see many people in the same situation and a lot of times,these men never get jobs.I think you should make the best of it in the mean time instead of living in constant misery.Yes,you can be sending out his cv & stuff and encouraging him to find something to do but my own is what happens now now? Let him be the home manager.He may love it,you never know.

Just wear him down with so much s ex that he cant move,then tell him there has to be a balance between 'you and him' time & 'friends time.
Maybe find stuff that you both can do together even if its weekends away in a hotel..Best to do it now before babies land.
Hopefully he will come around.If he doesn't, start a book club or something to keep your mind occupied otherwise you will find yourself steaming with anger daily.

Good Luck.

@OP,
Unfortunately,chances that your husband will ever get off his butt and get hustling is 2/10. If he were enterprising,you wouldn't be this aggrieved because youd see he's making an effort.Many go out there and get their hands dirty even if it brings in 10k. The fact that he's not making an effort should give you a clue.Many people in your situation,10 years,20 years no change.

Just get used to the idea that you will most likely be the breadwinner forever.If possible update your skills and get a better job.I say this for the sake of your kids cos as they get older,the cost of caring for them will increase.

This may sound crazy to you but maybe he has to take on the role of househusband if you are open to it.He can clean the house,cook,care for the kids,prepare them for school etc while you go out to hustle just same as a stay at home mom..This may work better for you both cos at least you will be getting all the help you need with the home and maybe it will alleviate some of the stress and anger you feel.You should discuss it with him and find out what he thinks about it.Many families do this especially when the woman is a higher earner and the childcare costs are too high meaning that one partner has to stay and man the home front.

Good Luck!

@lexicot,

You sound like a fantastic human being
I hope you won't let this illness stop you from living your life to the fullest.So glad your medication is working...Please help educate others!!!
All the best sir!

Fantastic thread OP,

Having seizures or being diagnosed with epilepsy is nothing to be ashamed of.It is an illness,most times lifelong but it is not a thing of shame.
The general public have to be sensitized to understand that it is not infectious,so there's no need to run,there's no need to shove spoons and stuff into their mouths,just put them in that position the Op has shown and make sure the area is free from dangerous objects.When the fit passes,proceed to the hospital.

A. The first step is to consult with a Neurologist so they can determine the kind of seizure you are suffering from.There are many different types even those brought about by spikes in temperature mostly seen in children.Once seen,the consultant can them place you on medication,70% of people can be seizure free while on medication,there's no point running from pillar to post seeking solution without first trying the medical route.
Different meds will be tried in diff doses till the right one is found.

B. It is also important to keep a seizure diary as this helps you to know what and what occurred before you had the seizure.This could aid in identifying your triggers.If you record each thing that happened lets say if you fit like 3/4 times you may begin to see a pattern.

1.it could be flashing light of tv, 2. some long time spent in front of laptop,3.some disco lights, 4.alcohol too which can lead to dehydration 5. Low blood sugar(not eating properly) 5. Stress etc
Knowing what causes you to have a seizure goes a long way to help so that you can at least avoid those things.

C.You need to inform people-This is crucial so that they lookout for you and know exactly what to do incase you start fitting.You can teach them what to do for you.If you want to fly,inform the airline.If you are going swimming,inform the life guards and always use a life jacket.There is no shame,if people know what to do,your life could be saved.

D. At home,you are advised to avoid bathing in a bath tub filled with water just to avoid drowning its better to use a shower.Leave the door open when bathing just incase. Avoid open fires and generally leave sharp objects in safe places.

E.If you can,always wear a bracelet identifying your condition.eg Epilieptic,-check my bag for what to do or who to contact.

F. In some places,dogs are trained to detect seizures and are able to nudge their owner to a place of safety and a comfortable position till the fit passes.

E One final thing i have to add is that when children have a fever,please don't sponge them with cold water it could have a reverse effect because the blood vessels under the skin tighten up and traps the heat which will lead to a further spike.Best to sponge with tepid/lukewarm water then give paracetamol to bring the temperature down.Avoid fanning too and covering the child with excess clothing.

Sorry,if i've forgotten anything...My best wishes to the lovely men and women suffering this.I strongly believe that there will be a cure one day.Until then, STAY SAFE

As i said before,alot of people do believe ra pe is ra pe only when it sounds like a violent act has taken place with the victim screaming like a banshee.Then ofcourse she must be dressed like a nun and be a virgin as well.The perpetrator must also be a stranger because if she went visiting a guy,what was she expecting?Maybe she smiled somehow and turned him on.
Unfortunately,ra pe doesn't follow a set pattern and the people who inflict this damage are normally known to the victim.RA PE can occur over and over again if the victim has somehow become psychologically entwined with the perpetrator.The link below defines exactly what i'm trying to say.

http://www.pcar.org/blog/common-victim-behaviors-survivors-sexual-abuse

@ Onegai,
at the shooting range,good luck with that.I would start with self defense classes when baby E grows up.

Another thing is sex ual education should be properly introduced in schools and a clear outline of what ra pe is.Some people do not understand that NO is NO.Some do not know that an inebriated person doesn't have the capacity to consent.A person who is mentally ill also is classed as vulnerable and therefore cannot give consent(even if their mouth is saying yes). Minors sending nudes of themselves to fellow minors is a crime and the person will be tagged a se x offender(where i am).Adult + consenting minor =Statutory ra pe.Forcing yourself on someone you are in a relationship with when they've said No is ra pe.

The funniest part of this thing is that the same people screeching would bust an artery if they find out that their 17 year old sister is sleeping with the maths teacher.Why will the normal reaction be to do damage to the teacher? why not say it's my sisters fault??Maybe her school uniform showed her brastrap.If a teenager is acting sex ually suggestive,is that normal behaviour?A wellbred adult would RUN for the hills instead of making excuses saying the girl don begin de knack since 15,her eye tear pass old woman own.When you see girls like this,there is ALWAYS a problem with upbringing,a big gap somewhere.Why would someone choose to have se x with such a person? Why not go for someone your age?
The law is the law no matter how hard we try to twist it.Maybe we should lower the age to 3 or 4 because in some peoples minds,a 10 year old is mature.Where then will we draw the line and know that a MINOR is a MINOR because they are not yet mentally mature even though sometimes they feel they know everything?


Ra pe has to be defined to avoid excuses.

@cococandy
It's not that she's popular..I found her blog when she started and it just was morbid and realish..
Always talking about Bakura.I was always wondering how a person could be so miserable.People always tried to encourage her but she just could never got better..From one dark story to another,sometimes just one line.I had to stop reading cos of the gloom and so much mental suffering she wrote about.
But she's so talented and her stories about her illustrations so beautiful.
I'm now more determined to raise my children up to be healthy emotionally..I'd rather my child is over confident than suffering low self esteem abeg.

Meanwhile on stelladimokokorkus blog some people have said he was 28 in 2007 not 25 as previously thought

I wish you all the best missymassy..hope you get all your heart desires!!

Reading her story has made me shake..The amount of depravity in Nigeria is sickening & the funniest part is that we cloak it well well with spirituality,sounding off about morals.

The simple fact is that MANY nigerian males do not know what statutory ra pe is.They do not understand what ra pe is.If a lady is not screaming and fighting then they will never accept it's ra pe.If you wear short clothes - you are begging for it.If you walk alone at night,you will be blamed.If you have had se x before,you cannot be raped.It's amazing really!!

If people google stockholm syndrome- (A condition where a victim identifies with the perpetrator even to the extent of defending them),they will understand why she kept on going back.
This girl had no father figure and an absentee mother,it's not surprising that at 17 she would fall into the hands of a predator.At 17,she'd be in ss3 or a fresher in Uni.No guidance at all while a 25 year old grandpa preyed on her emotions,groomed her well well and introduced her to the world of perversion.In this kind of situation,being in love with such a man and suffering from low self esteem added to a dysfunctional home is a lethal combination.She'd be willing to do ANYTHING he asked for as long as he kept on assuring her of his love twisted as that sounds this sort of thing happens.People do not understand he psychological hold an abuser holds over their victim.

On the issue of morals i see the holy brigade rounded on her calling her a slut.Forgetting the useless man who was definitely looking to chop a fresh girl.A well brought up man would run away from a minor without looking back or at most advice her on her behaviour.In sane climes,a MINOR cannot give consent to s ex.The man would land in jail!!
What exaclty is it that makes her a slut? The fact that she had s ex and had the guts to talk about it to her supposed boyfy and send him nudes?
People who believe themselves to be in love do such things on the regular especially olodo females who don't know they should also be collecting the nudes of the guy as well complete with his face..
The people calling her slut are usually the most depraved oo,probably rubbing off to po rn,and visiting brothels but na them de shout pass.

Sacrilege if a woman enjoys se x.. Little wonder Naija females resort to saying they were ra ped as an excuse for not being virgins.SE x is enjoyable and no female should be ashamed of it.The sooner these loons realise it,the beter off we will all be.After all,is it goats and cows they are banging?

Not to even talk of the females who would rather die than speak up for a victim in such a situation but would rather throw stones on her and say she enjoyed being passed round like a rag.

Since 2007 this girls blog has been dark,talking about suicide,her experience with this guy,depression,hardly any form of happiness.I used to wonder how she was able to function with her psyche so damaged.I don't know if she can ever ive a normal life even after years and years of therapy.

I'm sure she feels like she's being ra ped again with all the vitriol being thrown her way.I hope she stays strong.The impunity with which people in power act is beyond belief and they will look you in the face and say you cannot do anything.Anyway,we have pedophiles& domestic abusers as senators and governors..What's left to say

Is it not this same Naija that mentally deranged women who roam around the streets get pregnant?Who is impregnating them?I laugh in Swahili!!

Hi Missymassy,
Sorry im just seeing this,been a bit busy and will disappear for a bit again(crazy busy)
I do understand where you are coming from and honestly speaking,it's not easy....
The GS things is no joke,you may do once and hit jackpot..you may have to do multiple times.The problem is the funds needed.
Your hubby has to be fully on board with the whole thing and you will need support as it most likely will be emotionally draining. It's just so dicey.
About my parents,they are there oo,normal naija marriage.Nothing special..I know the scars from all the wahala from hunting for boy are still there.Honestly i don't think my mother can ever fully recover from the trauma and i don't believe my father will ever stop being disappointed that he doesn't have a son from his own loins. They are coexisting,not like they've ever been madly in love anyways.I forgot to add that my father also wanted 2 kids .We are pushing 10.It's just sooo funny now that i'm writing it.

All girls family needs a special kind of father and mother..liberal minded & focused to get the best out of the kids.


You need to look deep down inside and be totally honest with yourself as to why you are so anxious..Is the anxiety coming from your parents experience?Are you foisting it onto your marriage? Would Dh be satisfied with status quo? Are you scared of what he might do? Do you think he may turn into boy hunter? You should have an idea of the kind of man you are married to then advise yourself accordingly. How many kids do you want?Is DH willing to shift on number of kids he wants despite the se x? You both will have to talk earnestly and see if it's worth the hassle,and if you decide not to go that way what next?Keep trying for the boy and then where will you stop?(5 or 6 kids down the line?)
Is the money you will spend on GS going to be worth it for you in the end?If having a boy will give you that ecstatic elusive happiness,you may have to go for it but i doubt it would solve anything though..

Believe me when i say this- Everything you are looking for is in your two girls..every little thing.

It is weeellll

Don't know if this thread has been abandoned but i grew up in a house of over 6 girls no brother and parents who though tried to pretend but experienced severe gender depression.Always arguing about it,threats counter threats and insults from some relatives.My mother kept trying well into her 40s and still no success.In the end she adopted a boy in her 50s.

I think parents need to be careful about the kind of message they are passing across subconsciously.My mothers endless boy hunt made me feel like maybe we were not enough?I asked her why she was risking her life (about 3 miscarriages) and she kept on citing culture,and trying to protect us from 'wicked' uncles etc. One thing i know for sure is that adopting the boy still has come with it's own complications,apathy from us and wondering how he will be raised as my mother is a career woman who has no time.So its not like shes going to pour all her love into him or anything,he's just there to fulfill her boy hunger.I told her that adopting a child just for the sake of his gender is unacceptable and selfish but dem no dey hear so .I'm too far away and sooo much older so im not growing with him,my other sisters hardly know him as well because they are busy with work/uni. You need to know my mother is not just anyone o,has reached the peak of her career etc so it's not a local woman i'm talking about here.Meanwhile it's not like she and my dad are drunk in love sef after the son.

That said,no matter how much you try to mask your' depression',truth is that you will never be satisfied till you get that boy. That's just how it is unfortunately.My advise is this..if you want to do anything,do it now!! Don't wait till you have 5 girls.If you have money go for gender selection and spare yourself the lifelong misery.One thing i know though is the more desperate you are,the further away what you want gets away from you,i don't know why but it's the irony of life.This whole gender thing made me search for a spouse who was indifferent to se x of a child,and one of the factors that made me get out of naija..I dont know your home situation(as per fear of what DH may do in future in the hunt for boy),don't know how you grew up as that may be contributing to your anxiety but I will say better select and rest since you are unhappy.
Having boys will not make a marriage happier or more fulfilling neither will it stop any spouse from misbehaving if they choose to.

It takes a special man&woman to raise a one se x family,especially an all girls one..some people are naturally contented and more accepting of whatever life has handed them and will make the best of it.It is not easy as the parent will have to constantly revalidate the girls,assure them of their love,spur them on to greater heights,expect nothing less than excellence from them.Show them they can be better than the boys,change tyres,wash cars,fuel and power the gen without batting an eye.I have a friend who goes out for beers with her father in the evenings,they are 4 girls and all worth 100 boys(their father sings this to them whenever they come with questions).


I didn't do gender selection,in fact i was battling ttc so just wanted anyone and didn't care.I have one of each.Life happens but please while you are seeking the boy be careful around the girls because you may be passing a message to them without even speaking a word.I know i have both but I had to write this to speak up for that girl child because I was in that shoe and this is how it appeared in my eyes no matter how they tried to pretend infront of us(arguing behind closed doors,family meetings etc).Children naturally pick up when parents are unhappy and soon they grow up and understand.

In the meantime,ginger yourself and start seeing your girls as special,determine in your heart that they will be raised without any bias and will be excellent to the best of your ability.My sisters also very anxious like you,even the unmarried ones.I hope you get all your heart desires.


Good Luck ma!

Its a shame really..
Babe3,you are such a young girl and have just ruined your life by associating with the wrong type.
Everything shown up there kind of portrays you as an accomplice unfortunately whether you were willing or not.From the little i've seen,what differentiates a baby scammer from a baba scammer is the collation of information.A baba scammer will start from day one to save all the conversation you've had with him,add nu de pics to it and have documented discussions with you that will implicate you in his crime.This is the leverage they always have for back up incase of threats because they know if they go down they'll take you down with them so most times,victims keep quiet.

I understand you are hurt and basically have nothing to lose anymore.Your na ked pics -done,your credit score-tanked,mountain of debt.The implication is enormous for your future so I guess you are willing to go down guns blazing as long as he's also punished.Please lawyer up and don't waste your time online,there's a lot of work to be done to avoid jail time.

I really hope you have learnt your lesson though i'm not so convinced about you being so naive as to the crime he was roping you into.I believe you will start having better taste in men.It's better to be with a broke hardworking decent man than a rich fraudster who will always bring pain upon pain to you.When something is too good to be true,danger looms.

Normally,i'd have said maybe this is a one off, request for full payment and move on because of the risk of you being implicated and the damage it could do to you as per future employment but it seems there are more victims.Do whatever your lawyer advises you to.There is no man on this planet worth destroying your life for.You are young and you can build back again.Best to fight your battle offline and stop exposing your ammunition here.

Whether babe3 is scorned or not,when a woman has reached the end of the rope and reacts,there will be hell to pay.The accused is not helping by mouthing off online.If you understand women,the more you run them down and play hard man,the blood thirstier /vengeful they become even to their own detriment.As it is,she's at the point of not caring about entering jail and that means there's fire on the mountain.
Ladies watch and learn..Never love foolishly.


Good luck!

Reyginus:
What do you mean by the Wunmi Allen Way?

A scam thread that rocked nairaland waaay back.The Wunmi scammed aieromon,then when people came to accuse her or expose her she started threatening to post emails where they were asking her for se xual favours etc.This in effect silenced many of them cos they were married men.
The thread got derailed by all the allegations and the main issue was almost abandoned cos of the distraction tactics. In the end the victim still didn't get anything resolved.

NL is filled with fraudsters and criminals.Seems they are getting more sophisticated as time goes by.

As I said before,this thread is going the Wunmi Allen way...

Anyone with a dot of common sense has deciphered what is really going on here.

This should teach people hot lessons,NEVER EVER have dealings with people on NL,ladies beware!!

This is specially for females..Never ever give any man ammunition to use against you.If he asks for nu de pics,make sure u have several full length ones of him first with his face clearly showing.If you must send,crop your head out.Don't be a fool in the name of love.

I hope the accused comes up with pure facts instead of the tired 'scorned woman' gist.He is known to be very caustic tongued and argumentative in the family section.I'm surprised he hasn't beaten down these accusations with clean and concise facts.

Miss Babe3, you and the accused used to bully/ gang up against people who had opposing opinions as you.I'd have preferred for you to keep your private life private, then seek legal redress first before coming on NL for expose but im just a faceless poster,what do I know.
I say this because as a female,even if you have been scammed,you will be labelled bitter,scorned,angry,trying to get back at the guy because you were dumped etc.. Its the normal way these things happen.If your aim is to warn off other ladies,you write your story and back up with evidence then go radio silent.
However,if this is your way to get closure,fine.No one has a right to tell you when and how to heal.

This whole thing reminds me of wunmi allen /aieromon case.The males who tried to expose her,she threatened with exposure cos she had dossiers on them asking for se xual favors including the married ones.

NL family section is diseased and filled with bullies.A lot of inappropriate conversations between the married and unmarried.Now there's talk of se x amongst them too.No wonder a particular set keep on threatening some with exposure..24/7 i will expose you etc. Tuehhhh

Abeg my rules on NL, 1. Post my opinions and gerrout. 2.Never reply PM in this life. 3.No need for useless over friendly banter or taking chat from NL to yahoo .4.Avoid useless arguments. 5. If you wan chop blokos why chop from dead ones on NL when fresh ones plenty in real life?Chop clean your mouth then continue forming saint okoro on NL.

Good luck madam and sir. Im sure this will lead nowhere as per usual on NL.

He should carry his cross and shattap.
Next time invest in a condom,spend less time having se x and more time speaking and investigating the person you plan to marry,also checking out the family she's from.
She cant have changed overnight,he just was blinded by se x.Then married her out of obligation due to pregnancy,i bet eerything she does wrong will be exaggerated in his eyes.
Too late to do anything.
He should get on his knees and pray for change.

Good on the ladies abeg.Body no be firewood.Chop clean mouth,repent and sin no more.
Then repeat the cycle when necessary.Everyone stays happy