₦airaland Forum

Ishilove:
Misogyny-

dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women.

Say what?

And thus she missed the sarcasm. Insert naughty smirk and wink here.

Ishilove:
That one is normal lecherous hanky panky by an ageing man. The one I find shocking is this booty call arrangement

Mmmm. I think you are shocked because a woman initiated it. Men have been initiating such arrangements since time immemorial, but now a woman tries it... Tsk tsk, Ishi, i never knew you were a sexist and a misogynist.

Ishilove:
I am shocked

No you're not. What of your alhaji back during ajuwaya?

QueenBelle:
I read a lot of sexual texts. You don't need to enter the rain to know that its cold. Not one road leads to the market

Sorry princess but you're wrong. Yes, excessive masturbation does weaken the nerve endings, but it has nothing to do with the penile muscles which control the shape of the male tool when it is fully engorged.

Ishilove:
Oh dear, I have really lived a sheltered life. So these kinds of things happen?

Its a free world - and getting freer by the day. Babe knew exactly what she wanted and wasn't afraid to ask, and if i'm not mistaken she's already gotten her heart's desire. Goodbye stereotypes.

resurgent4oodua:
For starters, you won't get any meaningful advice here but condemnations. Nigerians are very judgmental.


And as for your issue, I know that it is infatuation. Give it some time and you will get over her. I wouldn't say you should quit the brothels outrightly(because it's not easy), but try and find one normal girl to be chatting with. Not that the normal girls are better than the brothel girls, but you can marry them to produce children.

Abi na the Ashewo you wan marry?

The bolded says it all.

hkidola00:
common,common,dis isn't about being childish, I thought Dis move might make me know d kind of girl she is

Seriously bro, what more "kind of girl" is it you want to find out about her?? Thought you said it was no-strings-attached... And tell your friend to learn to chase his own tails; trying to poach one off you is just lame. Of course that's probably cos you dudes never learnt to not kiss and tell.

Smh... Amateurs.

@COdeGenesis

Take it easy, bro... and i'm saying this with as much kindness as I can infuse into this post. Believe me, it is not the end of the world. I've been there, so I understand the anguish your soul feels at this kind of insensitivity - almost pushed me to consider robbing a bank once. I don't talk about it much, but I know in my heart it was something I almost did - I have a cause-and-effect kinda mindset and I never leave things to chance, I probably would have succeeded - but thankfully it was a path I didn't take. Scary how close our stories could have turned out to be something else, right..?

Sadly I honestly don't know who to suggest you contact/tag, what with how things work in Nigeria. What i can advise however is reach out to your closest friend (or family sibling). Trust me, burdens shared always become lighter - even when the person doesn't actually do anything to help, just listening to you can make so much difference.

Don't give up, bro. Stay strong, there's light at the end of that tunnel.

MissRaine69:
The Mursi,Suri,Karo,Humar and Bena tribespeople are not fair or light skinned at all. I have spent a lot of time to this subject matter and there are elements of what you say the nurture component . However I agree the focus on darker skin tone hues ( no one is charcoal in complexion) is almost like a novelty. I attribute some of this to Black Panther the movie when suddenly it become cool to be African.

Colourism exists. I have heard African Americans be very deragotory towards Africans who are significantly darker. Black people are the worst when it comes to decriminating especially amongst our own kind.

The bolded, so sooo true! I tell people, let's just be glad its white people dominating the world; it'd been black folks, slavery would still be in vogue. That's how mean we can be.

Suddenly cool to be African, yeah big ups to Black Panther. My favorite scene in that movie was when Danai Gurira whips off her stewpid ugly wig at the casino and flings it away. My dislike for artificial hair no here o.

No one is charcoal-black? Mmmmmm, there was this guy I used to know back in secondary school....

MissRaine69:
What about parenting and upbringing play what role? If a child is made to feel insecure about their appearance from an early age and goodness knows we as a society are very good at doing that, then the role of the beauty industry is an accessory to how we view each other. There are many African communities were you will not find anyone fair skinned. Ethnic groups from the Sudan? Eastern part of the Sahel?

...Except that the said parenting is being done by parents who also grew up believing (or in most cases, just tacitly accepting) that fairer is more beautiful. And so, because they see anything wrong in it, they fail to pick up on the fact that their own children have begun to form opinions of what is "beautiful" and what isn't, mostly from what they watch on tv and see around them. And yes, I do agree that the role of the beauty industry is secondary; they're just supplying a demand.

@ "...Eastern Sahel", I couldn't really say but following it all the way to coast by the Red Sea you have Eritrea/Ethiopia, and those folks are pretty light skinned.

But hey, all is not doom and gloom... the last decade has seen a rise in the media of the "beautiful black woman", complete with charcoal dark skin, full lips, kinky hair, and big-a$s hips. I believe having more women blazing the "African woman" look as models of beauty will help to change the perception... But that's just my opinion.

Uglymugg:
she's the one trolling me. 22inches? Really? Of course she's a girl so she can do no wrong in your eyes

Plenty girls do plenty wrong in my eyes; I'm just particular to missraine. But i digress...

@MissRaine69,
Yes, skin tone discrimination most certainly exists among blacks - which as you rightly surmised is the driving force behind the bleaching industry. But i personally think it came with the eroding our old values and perceptions of beauty - you grow up watching "white" caucasians on the telly with long wavy hair and all, soon enough you start wanting to look like that. Right from their tender ages, kids watch tv shows, cartoons and movies where practically all the good guys and desirable girls are white/fair skinned, while the bad guy or evil monster is almost always painted in dark colours. Think cinderella, snow white, little mermaid, wonderwoman, they even managed to give the first Disney black princess a fair skin and wavy hair. Simply put: the fairer, the more beautiful.

Uglymugg:
How can something like this fit inside of you? Goddamn.

You've finally gotten the "answer" you want, and now you can troll to your heart's delight.

LivingFree:
FULL STORY

Naughty u.

yeyerolling:
Who goes for a robbery with a pistol Excessive force used here. I smell a rat

I thought I was the only one having doubts on the story...

First they said they had "intelligence reports of a planned robbery"; ok I'm listening. Then they said the vehicle was stopped on the N2 (in case you don't know, thats a 3-lane highway); so a planned robbery on an expressway? Ok o... Then lastly, can someone please explain how the dead suspect on the road got there? I thought they opened fire from the car and the cops returned fire... Abi it was the bullets that flung him out of the car window?? See how conveniently the handgun is lying close to hand, so absolutely "no doubt" that it was the suspects gun!

I could be wrong of course, but it seems more likely to me that that man was trying to run away and they shot him down, then planted the gun next to him. Another question here, why would they cover the body before taking the picture? After all they didn't cover the ones inside the car... My guess is so we won't see where the bullet entry wounds are - if its in the back, then the man was shot while running away.

Smh...

@LivingDead

I'll be blunt with you, bro. I can't remember when last I made a comment on this forum, but I'm posting this because I feel you need to hear some hard truths: I think your biggest problem is lack of belief in yourself. Seems like you have already written yourself off as a failure - you'd rather wallow in self-pity, comparing yourself to others. My brother, that is the biggest waste of time.

I see you ignoring the id1ots and twats making fun of your condition, and it tells me that you've realized that people like that and what they say don't matter - you simply tune them out like a bad radio station. But beyond that, you need to find purpose in yourself - and if you can't find one, then CREATE it. Your condition is truly sad, and I salute your courage in not taking your own life yet - but you need to go a step further. Forget what your mates are doing and achieving - you are a lot stronger than they are! Otherwise make dem come try a few days in your shoes and let's see who's still standing by next week. So stop the comparisons and self-pity... Life has chosen to give you the sourest of lemons, so about we think about making some lemonades?

I read through some of your past posts, and I can see you have a gift for words. How about you make writing your hobby? Dreaming is free, my brother - why not dream and let your imagination run wild - and put it down in words. Even if people don't like it, well fvck them, who cares? As long as YOU like and enjoy writing, that's all that matters. And then think of the flip side - what if people DO like it? Who knows where you may end up...

My point is, don't give up on yourself. It doesn't have to be writing - look deep and find a passion you can still enjoy, and follow it. That is what life is really about - the pursuit of happiness. Choose to find your happiness.

Chidinma's missing period ... sotey dem call Chioma to find out if she's looking for her own too



Lalasticlala, c'mere. I think this story is worth FP.

The B+ one took me a while... especially cos my blood type is B+ too.

bukatyne:
He wants to fully own a house he did not build?

Hmmmm.

You said your husband is a good man; you are the only person with the licence to declare him good so he is.

The next question is 'What did you do to piss off a good husband so much that he wanted you to pack out and when you couldn't, abandoned you in the house?'

Exactly what I'm wondering.

LewsTherin:
Ok, got that.

Now like I said, normally, I am all for playing the fool in a relationship but your husband has set a bad precedent. First, he changed a joint agreement meant for your joint family in favour of his own family. Then he kicked you out of his house (as he thought it was). Then he insists you use your share of a joint decision, a decision that he reneged on, for his own benefit. Insisted on that twice ie before he knew it was in yiur name and after he knew it was in your name.

That is not good. Basically he has shown he is willing to abandon you and your kids if he “feels” like it. Sweetheart, no offense intended, but you don't have a good husband.

My advice to you and those in similar straits is
First, pray for your husband. Pray for God to change his person, to change his ways. If he claims to be a Christian, he sure as heck isn't showing Christ-like characters

Plan for your kids. Not to the exemption of your husband, but until he shows he can be different, plan to be able to live without him for your kids. I didn't say leave him. I said to be able to live without him. Different things.

Like you have been adviced, get an independent third party to mediate and see how that goes. I understand why you don't want to let your family know but it is dicey if they don't especially as he has involved his family from the beginning. I don't agree, but I understand. Maybe a compromise will be to tell your dad. Not your mum, not your sisters. Women by nature are very emotional and they can let their emotions overwhelm them. Tell your dad in confidence and ask him to keep it that way.

Finally, under no circumstances whatsoever should you add his name to that document. In mediations, the best you should do is to place the property in a trust for your children. Children! Not you, not him, not Mr and Mrs. Put it in the names of ALL your kids with a caveat that it cannot be sold by any one until all kids are above 18 years old.

Most of all, seek mediation and pray a lot for him.

My own advice.

OP, i haven't read to the very end of the thread (in case you've posted updates), but I think this is sound advice.

However... However, there are ALWAYS two sides to a story. For your husband whom you have built a home, a business, and a house with, to just demand you pack out - and then find out it's not even his house AND THEN PACK OUT HIMSELF.... Mmmm, nawa o, forgive me if I seem to be playing the devil's advocate but this is waaay more than just "a major misunderstanding"; I strongly feel there's more to this than you said. That's all I'm saying. But of course it's your life... please keep private whatever you feel should be kept so.

Mister Ayo-mide, biko ana m ayo gi ayo...

MissRaine69:
My dearly departed ancestors what are you on about now? ....

I like the way you call on your ancestors




By the way I think Dalby simply misunderstood you...

ubunja:
martin0 transfer your dick to xhosanostra she'll be a far better man in 1 month than you have ever been all your life...

I concur!!

surgical:
He is a casivist, insincere,his loyalty is to his sponsors not Nigerians,he has bad judgement which is essential for good leadership, his vigorous campaign for buhari ,exposed him including the half truth and slander his media organization publishes against perceived enemies of his paymaster,an attack dog cannot assumed the leadership position of this country but he can contest it is right

I am not aware that Somore/SaharaReporters had a paymaster/sponsor(s)... May i ask who he/she/they are?

"Bad judgement" is actually subjective. Did Obama have good judgement? Does Trump have bad judgement? Putin? May?

My personal concern is that almost all other presidential alternatives are worse (in my opinion, anyway).

obonujoker:
The only way I will believe you is if you don't share money when campaigning, and you make bold your claims at every campaign ground....

I concur on the bolded.

I have personally given up on the dream of a better Nigeria. The comparison Nigeria to the fictional Wakanda [url="https://www.nairaland.com/4375724/nigeria-wakanda-could-been"]on this thread[/url] just feels me with so much sadness.

I will watch Somore. Truth cannot hide. If Mr. Somore holds true till election day, I will cast my vote for him.

Newboss:
All these brainless people on Nairaland sef

You don't beat my friend, whether side chick or side kid, and expect me to be looking at you like mumu. I weee pounce on your destiny like a mighty man!

Thunder fall on the wife wey no get sense!

Face your fvcking husband, asshole!

I tell them that marriage is a scam to massage the male ego, they will be quoting Bible where most of the characters were polygamists!

Thank u jaré.

I don't do side-chics. But ever there comes a day i do so, then wifey had better have the good sense to keep her fury focused on me.

einsteine:
Good for the wife. Your husband, knowing he is married, cheats. You catch him and decide to slap the other woman. Is it the other woman you have business with? Confront your husband, not the third party. Of course she slapped the girl because in Nigeria everyone preys on who they feel is weaker than them. This is exactly what the woman has done and that is what her husband has also done.

Anyone who marries should take whatever comes with it, after all they are all rushing into it.

Spot on!

I can't believe it took 3 whole pages to find someone who actually understood why this ugly drama played out.

carinmom:
You guys are damn funny, what concerns a non Muslim with a Muslim thread, is the thread not meant for Muslims, why are you pained?

It was on the front page; is that not an invitation for all to comment?

But to borrow your choice of words, i am "pained" because there is no such threat on ANY christian topic. It might interest you to know that i sincerely don't really care whether allah or jesus christ or hari krishna gets the finger - they are free to come down from heaven or wherever and smother me in divine fury if they feel offended). But i strongly dislike double-standards, especially from persons in authority. If there must be an islamic declaration before one comments on a muslim thread, then other religion's should have their own declarations too before one can comment. What's fair is fair, innit??

So I checked up on my profile and true to the "declaration's" threat, there's a big banner of "There's no god but allah" on it now.

Well, luckily nobody has a monopoly on defacing private property, so I have made my own modifications. Oya come and flog me. And please feel free to ban the ID for the next 5 millenia, mtschewww. Yeye dey smell.

Fegelfire:
Good god you imbeciles are brainwashed from head to toe. Since when is Islam concerned about what women put up on their facebook pages? Why the hell do you care? Why would an all powerful superbeing like "Allah" frankly give a damn? This reads worse than some social policing I've heard about in Nazi Germany!

I just taya.

Meanwhile the pic below is a "declaration" you have to accept before you can comment on Islam-related threads. Talk about islamization, bigotry and double-standards. Shame on you, Seun.

Front page please.

cc lalasticlala, Seun, mynd44