₦airaland Forum

r231:
Oya come do exam....

How well do your know your EPL team?
The first person to answer all questions correctly goes home with a brand new N10K recharge card of any network. No giraffing please.

Premiership Exams

PREMIERSHIP WAEC EXAMINATION.

DURATION: 2 Hrs

ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS.

SECTION A.

1. Discuss the fall of Chelsea without using the sack of the BINI lady who was the team Doctor as illustration. (15 marks).

2. With the aid of a diagram, prove that Chelsea will go trophyless this season (10 marks).

3. Manchester United sold Di Maria to PSG for £44m when they had signed him for £59.6m. Prepare a profit and loss account (10 marks).

4. Estimate the velocity at which Liverpool is depreciating considering the absence of Suarez and Sterling not minding that they beat Chelsea at home. (10 marks)

5. What is the probability that Chelsea will not discover oil the way they are going down? (5 marks)

SECTION B.

6. Calculate the probability of Chelsea winning a game against Eyinmba of Aba in relation to current performances (10 marks).

7. Without using tables, list out the top clubs that will not qualify for the Champions League next season (10 marks).

8. With the aid of twitter justify the sudden quietness of all Chelsea fans these days on all social networks (15 marks).

10. Complete this...
In Wenger we trust,
In Pellegrini we're happy,
In Mourinho we ____________? (5marks)

11. If the presence of Drogba took away Torres goal scoring ability, will it be correct to say the absence of the Team Doctor took away Mourinho's coaching prowess? Explain (10 marks)

BEST OF LUCK!

Mogbe mogbe mogbe
See queshions, walahi this one hard pass CFA
I no do

Onegai:
Sudocrem is an antiseptic cream, 15% zinc oxide. If she doesn't have a rash or eczema, I don't know if you should be using it. Why not show it to your doctor to see what she prescribes? Or put a picture up here, maybe someone can recognise what's going on or show a dermatologist. Also try coconut oil or shea or cocoa butter on the patches, it may work.

I mix my own diaper rash protective cream from basic ingredients like beeswax, cocoa butter, Shea butter, lanolin, coconut oil. It's safe to use even on faces and hair (I use as my body cream) and keep the zinc oxide creams for when we have a rash (which is rare).

Happy happy birthday mama E!!!

Where is our cake and jorrof rice biko?

God bless you dear

DonTim1:
Wherever 2 women or more are gethered, evil lurks and awaits its unleashing

njokusboy - is this your brother?

Una 2 just dey para today o

njokusboy:
That one dey easy nah....

Nigerian women are about the laziest and the most self entitled women on the planet
Considering the amount of time they spend whining, I am shocked Nigeria does not rank 142 out of 142 on the gender gap index

yeye buoy!!

Bollinger:
Ever wondered how mama sikira's stew on the rice you always buy in the mornings is always so unique and delicious? Why is it that every morriinng you always wanna package one on the go to the office? Abi, is she adding suntin other than condiments into the mix? Never fear, i am going to share the secret, step by step with you today. You'll thank me later. What you need; habanero pepper, one or two green pepper, those long thing red pepper, (i forget what the are called) tomatoes, iru, onions, crayfish, orisirisi meat, palm oil and eggs which are optional. Blend the pepper and tomatoes and then cook it till all the water is drained. If the mixture is right, you'll get a somewhat brownish red look. Boil the meat with as little water as possible till soft. lastly, boil the eggs. When everything is ready, add palm oil into a pot and immediately add diced onions into it. Then add the orisirisi mix into it. Once it is properly fried remove it and immediately add the cooked tomato and pepper, iru, as well as the eggs into the pot which you fried the meat in. After two minutes add the meat and let it cook at medium heat till you see the oil rising to the top. This is when you add your maggi, crayfish and whatever condiments you like. I forgot to add that it is important to roast the long thing red pepper in a skillet or frying pan before blending. It is also important to let the stew burn slightly. It gives it a roasty aroma and taste.

you are welcome.

Waoh! Nice one bollinger

This looks very similar to how ofada/ayamashe stew is made. Just pockets of differences...and the 'burnt' advice is golden. 'Slightly burning' gives it a unique taste of its own weird but true. I learnt it overtime with my ayamashe stews. I can't wait to come to your eatery

@cococandy - you remind me of how I was only able to prepare meals and eat after getting inspiration from this thread. God bless Herzumpther. Those local delicacies of hers helped me a lot during my missionary journey.

Donald3d:
Light my baby,I am overwhelmed with joy at the success and your perseverance so far,including that of your mom,all is well,it is finished Isaiah 45 vs 2 I will go before thee, and make the crooked
places straight: I will break in pieces the gates of
brass, and cut in sunder the bars of iron.That is your portion,it is already a success,I will welcome you and grab you when you arrive,perfectly ok,
As for the escort tomorrow,I will gladly follow you ,i no get motor ooo,but muscle dey there to carry load,english dey my mouth too,and some sense of humor at least put a smile on your faces on the way ,I am quite charming I will talk to those beautiful ladies to respond to my baby quickly,....but seriously what's the plan,where are you moving from,when are you getting to Lagos,where will you be in Lagos,what help do you need,Ask ooo,we are here for you,I don't mind leaving work early because of my baby ,oya talk to me #ForMyBaby ayolight

Hehehehehe you make me laugh...no warry naa, your Range Rover is on the way

You might need to get a bit creative at the airport as there is a lot of restriction now on who can get in. Go in from the banking floor like you wanna go transact a business, once you are in, you can go join Light and co. downstairs. But if you think you can charm your way through the entrance security, then by all means

If the lady is not ready to give up on her marriage, then she somehow needs to find a way of knowing what's going on in the man's mind. What does he think of the whole situation? Is he feeling betrayed, unloved, and maybe even depressed? Has the incident truly in any way unleashed the beast in him? Or was he cheating albeit codedly before now?

I don't support cheating, I don't support abortion but I also don't support betrayal. That was the height of betrayal from the lady.

Two wrongs do not make a right, if they can both not handle the situation, they need to see a marriage or relationship counsellor (whoever that would be) asap.

naijababe:
Gorimapa feeling funky
Kimoni, we really have to prep for that ori-oe for Edwife o. Chelsea ti lana finally

The matter pass be careful pls let's start with 40 days dry fasting so our prayers will go straight to heaven...Edwife mi love, see what sisters are willing to do for for ya just for Chelsea to avoid relegation #chelseamustnotberelegated #chelseamustnoyberelegated

God heal our nation. Awesome act OP. If each one of us will help the man next to us, together, we will make a huge impact.

safe06:
hajia riri...hijab on bumshort?? ...funky hajia leleyi ke.won tun fi tiro si oju..e de ni kpe ko si.... ....may almighty Allah's rahma and nur be upon her,Amin..Hajia riri,salam alaekum...

@bumbex,fearfear mummy... ..u know say u no get power for aluta,u con dey support zaynie mugabe...

@ Kimoni..... ..now I know ya weak point...i wee catch u for front...

@snr elder beedam,hmmm...i like this ya greetings oo,abi time don reach to pay sadaqi... ..

@zaynie Mugabe - falls from iroko tree

sheweezy:
@zaynie, u know I v been onyour side always. So let's see in camera about your princess.

cc: modath
cc: zaynie
cc:ginababy, my latest friend

***faints***

Where are all these angels coming out from today

Kisses

beedam:
Seconded. I believe the probation will work.

Zaynie, the Financial committee of this honorable thread hereby give you 7 days to quench all the hullabaloo from mamas in the house. There has never been a coup in this house and we will not allow one to happen in our very before.

After 7 days, mamas shall confirm whether they are indeed happy with you to continue or not.

Your time starts NOW!






[s]As per your princess and my prince matter, see me after this time, make sure you bring her pics with you and no smiling when talking to me. [/s]

You go fear FP naa She dey drink am ni? Mtcheewwwww

beedam:
Make we no lie,the baby fine no be small.

Beedam, you sef see am, biko how do we resolve this matter naa?

Should we give her one week probation period to placate all mamas? Maybe, all the aluta and coup plotting will stop by then? Abi how you see am Beedam?


@Modath - you sef see say zaynie na Don

safe06:
unties kimoni's hands,safe06 won't permit emotional bribery ..... Aluta continua....

Zaynie must go

Forces bitter leaf juice mixed with aloevera into bumbex mouth,so that belle wee nor sweet....this Aluta must continua

@temmy,chei,see lil chairman saying hello like a boss.... ....God bless him..Amin..

@modath thanks ojere,thought u passed the position to this mugabe senobu,didnt know it was snr elder beedam. *i dey hail ma*

@iyeejire and mitchyy...congratulobia...

@ all mamas,i dey on my water bed dey hail on ooooo....

I am a sucker for babies ni it's like she knows my weak buttons and passed them adequately this morning soootay, me sef post my baby pic something I never dreamt of doing

RashMe:
@4 months

cc: modath

Ahhnn mamas are on fire this morning. God bless our angels..

temmy2103:
Hello bae

Another angel

God bless him

zaynie:
You side with me and she's all yours.
I know how to be grateful

my ribs ooo

Zaynie, how far naa?

modath:
Me I yaff remove my hand for the aluta crew with immediate effect... Dem ginababy, lioha, lovinam, beedam, talltosyne etc are all on their own ooo

Even if your statergy was a lowball, it WERKED For me ooo.. , I'm loving what I'm seeing, LBK should just remove mouth from bosom & get ready to go & pay for form..

Mumfiyin & proudmum38 should just stop eyeing me, me I get eye too!!


Atinuke, ori e a kan oke, you will always be relevant in decision making, you'll never be a backbencher, fforward ever ....

Modath, no vex, it's like I have to sideline you in this matter o. This baby too fine abeg. I think this princess will be good for my son. Zaynie, what sayeth thou?

zaynie:
Oya lemme bribe you small
Look at that innocent face.....
Look at the sweet child.....
Why do you want to overthrow her mother....


Hehehehhheheheh
#evilLaugh

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh
Zaynie is bribing us with this cute angelic baby picture
Someborrri heelllpppppppp
Now my hands are tied. Beedam, come see this angel I am seeing oo

Gboliwe:
Tenkiu very much.

Gboliwe, I will not allow her to teash you again o, kilode gaan sef inscribe it on your palms or thighs if you have to

Funjosh:
I think she also need someone from the Nairaland family that will also be with them at the Airport till they board the flight.

Cc kimoni

Ayolight come and share more light on this please.

I perfectly agree. Traveling with a baby is not easy especially these our "unique" airports. She will definitely need a helping hand.

Ayolight, have you booked a hotel in India? Do they have airport shuttle and if not, have you booked a cab that will come pick you at the airport? Some hotel demand that you inform them ahead if you are coming with a baby and any special needs you might have. Pls, be very generous with your requests while you are there, ask for anything at all that will make you and Light comfortable, let them be the one to say no if they don't have. Eg would you need a cot bed in your room, special baby meals eg mashed potato

Pls have the nos of the cab driver or airport helpdesk handy in case you will need to call them from airport. May God go before you and make every crooked path straight.

While I agree there are not enough equipment and even manpower in our hospitals, the lacadestical attitude of out nurses might be doing much more harm to the patients. We have cases of women giving birth on the roads but because other women with experience would rally round her and offer basic support and assistance, the lives of both mother and baby would be spared.

When you are in pains, there are physical and psychological pains involved. The psychological pains if not managed, can kill faster than the physical pains. What nurses do with their callous and nonchalant attitude is to drain you emotionally, increase the physchological pains you are feeling, thereby making you lose the will and desire to fight for life. And death is only too happy to offer respite to such a person

Nurses, as a first step need to really ask themselves why they are in that line of work at all. If it's for the money, they should just exit the profession cuz that profession ain't about money making. It's a vocation of sacrifice and only those who have in them can do it. It's a calling and it's not for everyone.

However, government also need to provide the enabling atmosphere for nurses to work as there is little that can be done without the right equipment and incentives. Thereafter, anyone found wanting or culpable in his or her line of duty should be not be spared and when live(s) is involved, whoever is found deficient should be treated as what he or she really is - murderer! No sugar coating of what it is and the full weight of the law should apply. #nigerianlivesmatter

Jarus:
Yes to all your questions. My name is Suraj Oyewale.

Nice! It's interesting how I met 3 brothers from the same family at different platforms. Small word they say.

I should be seeing AK later today at a private dinner.

Anyways, nice meeting you. I remain anonymous though cuz of my corporate profile, that much we learnt from ANAP. Hehehehehe

Have a great day!

beedam:
Here I am o. Kikikimoni( I remember you always because there is someone in my office that bears imokimoni) . Zaynie? What's happening? Why all this?

Hmnnnnn, she don land!!!! Ajebidan (somebody help me translate)
You call her once, she answer 5 times. You are the true son of your mother!

Na zaynie matter ooooo.


**who is that that stole half of my name in your office?

pickabeau1:
It has turned upside down inside out left right and turned again..
See the bride.....fierce !!

Halle Bee is just a sympathy garnerer
Shame how one so talented can be so drama laden
Post the link when u get it

Halle is a media darling. She thrives on it, her worth and significance in Hollywood is tied to the love from her fans. She always had to be the good person. Same with Sandra Bullocks. The power of PR, what can we do? But truthfully, I love these two women

What beats me about this guys is how they wanna eat their cake and have it, it will choke them and choke the whole system naa. Just imagine that one up there in a bridal dress? Same people want to adopt kids, what nature does not allow them to both have as a couple, and the system is granting them every request This news can be very nauseating walahi

Sure, I'll post it as soon as I lay my hands on it.

Idowuogbo:
Lol yeye woman. I know it seems as if i keep picking on light's dad but can't he at least do this part? Family members nko? Can't someone in-house follow them to the airport? Haba!

I know but on a second thought, I think he put one gbemu down so he might be excused. I think....

Mamalight, what of the guy that offered to drive you round Lagos. Can he be of help since he has a ride. Pick you up from the bus park maybe....

zaynie:

Isnorfair o

you sef see where your mata don reach? Buhari's ears are full mehnnn

zaynie:
Ahn ahn Snr Kimoni....you too?
Mamas ngbo you ppl are complaining?
You have not been getting alerts keh?

Zaynie, our ears are full. Everywhere I go, na so so "Zaynie is terrorizing us" we dey hear

The elders are meeting tomorrow. I don't see how you will escape this one o. Infact, it will be easier for Saraki to avoid CCT trial than for Zaynie to remain in this position by tomorrow. We have to do the needful before the looming coup mamas are planning happens. O ma se o

talltosyne:
I dey hail ooooooooo all snr mama s in d house. How vigilante?
May God crown all our effort with good reward.

Abeg, I con report Zaynie frm preggy thread, she really dey terrorize us for there and her tenure don expire.

Make una help us ooooo

Thanks in anticipation

Are you kidding me?? zaynie matter don reach new born thread?

Beedam!! Beedam!!!!!! Beedam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pls report for emergency board meeting biko.

Zaynie wants to dabaru this our golden source of income. Her own don pass king pharaoh own sef.
My ears are full. We need to convene urgently on her matter
#zayniemustgo #zayniemustgo

Ponponkon:
Your excellency(future) I wish you the best

don't worry guy, I will remember you in my kingdom. Just show me this post when the time comes