bullabong:
What will your so called saviour Christ expect the pastor to do? Persecute or bless? You lot are the confused ones who preach one thing and do another. Hypocrites describes you all.

My 'so called' Saviour would want me to lawfully seek justice in the interest of the gospel which has come under attack from agents of the devil such as yourself & your dearest Kemi.

Remember, "the Kingdom of Heaven suffereth violence & the violent taketh it by FORCE".

bullabong:
Do you still believe those scary bible stories you were told in Kindergarten? Man, you really need to grow up by applying wisdom to you thinking.

Wow, why don't you go ahead and bail out your dearest mommy Kemi if you do really care about her as you would want us all to believe, rather than displaying your disgusting obsession with a religion you clearly do not like

And since you did ask, YES! I do believe in the Holy Bible 100% and would continue to do so till I finally depart this world by His grace. I just hope your pathetic obsession with my religion won't cause you heart attack sha; lol.

For your own good, you better learn to stop drinking panadol for our headache Mr. Atheist wannabe. We the Christians are not complaining & we enjoy the said 'exploitation' so well, OK?

davtosh:


Nairaland is a very good place to see display of ignorance by ppl who went to school to waste their parents hard earned money.

This guy can do the needful . File another case on behalf of Kemi for her release.

Ppl that wont take nonsense when ppl blackmail them suddenly will turn to angels preaching Mercy overnight on NL

Don't mind those confused atheists wannabes.

I wonder why they haven't proceeded to perfect the woman's bail bond or even use all lawful means to compel the authorities to release her, if really they care so much.

Someone that even her own family have deserted because of her overwhelming stubbornness & irresponsibility.

bennyann:


The bolded is a very good point to be noted. But remember you used the word 'unintentionally'. Don't you think once the good girl feels connected to someone, and that someone genuinely loves her, he will stay and help her through the way she thinks?

There should be someone to help her out of what she's been fed with which won't help her eventually. At least in the whole wide world, there must be someone to stand by her and show her the way when others are running away from her.

And don't forget you've also judged her because you think or feel she's judged you.

And are you trying to say most good girls have serious issues compared to the other?

And I love your last statement. I concor with it

I understand your point and I'm not trying to dismiss the fact that a lot of sisters since time immemorial have been opportuned to have godly men take them to the alter in holy matrimony.

I however believe the problem often lies in the character of the individual; and not one's religious zeal. I have seen instances where some sisters in the Lord refuse to relate cordially with men they consider not too religious for their taste. Whereas these men are believers who uphold the faith with seriousness. But maybe because the men do not attend most weekdays' church programmes as they should, or they are not active members of any church group, e.t.c, the ladies will not even consider relating freely with them, even as just platonic friends.

Nevertheless, I'm still of the opinion that godly ladies have an even better opportunity of successfully getting married than the unbelieving ones.

bullabong:
how many accusers did Jesus report to the scribes for slandering him? Instead Jesus kept praying for his accusers and wishing them well. Pls follow fake pastors/ motivational speakers with some sense.

Jesus Christ did not report the accusers so as to fulfil the prophecy of his death to save mankind. Thus, comparing the Pastor's case with that of Jesus Christ is pointless.

The fact is the Holy Bible affirms the importance of the the law/authority in matters involving unbelievers (of which undoubtedly atheists like Kemi and yourself are).

I'll leave you with this Bible scripture:
Romans 13:1-6

1 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
3 For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended.
4 For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.
5 Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience.
6 This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God’s servants, who give their full time to governing.

Also, to seek justice lawfully is an action that is rightly permitted by God.
Isaiah 1:17

Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow.

Therefore, in order to avoid a lawless society, seeking justice the right way is very necessary; and same is fully supported by the Holy Scripture.

analice107:

That is it my dear. But, we humans want to become what others have become without finding out if can withstand the pressure that comes with their assignment.

Our pastors are mostly to blame for this. Oh well, most of them have no idea of what we are saying here.

Success is not acquiring all the wealth in the world. Success is discovering your purpose on earth, pursuing it, and accomplishing it. This is what the Bible calls, ENTERING YOUR REST.

As long as we are wrongly positioned, we can never walk out of struggles. It's like a Seed planted in a wrong soil and in a wrong climate.

This is the reason many resort to seeking the aid of the supernatural, hence, inviting demons to help them out.

Anyone who remains in God's rest will not lack anything. His/her basic needs will be provided. All we need is daily bread anyways.

True.
Success is not all about material wealth, but primarily having a fulfilled life that glorifies God and is also beneficial to oneself, as well as at least, someone out there.

bullabong:
He is not the Nigerian constitution but who fueled the process of implementing the constitution?
Please you people should stop worshiping glorified mortal men like yourselves who can't even practice what they preach, its just so disgusting.

So? Do you expect him to ''force' the Police to let her go or what
By the way he is not the only person that reported her to the Police; so he cannot withdraw a case that has been filed by other individual(s) against her.

I don't know why you all keep bothering the Pastor to release her as if he is the authority that is detaining her in the first place. Clearly y'all don't know how criminal cases work.

I just want to add a bit to what @analice107 et al have rightly stated.

It is true God plans/sets/determines our destinies & purpose in life. It is also true that God's plan for every individual is for good, and not evil. And as mortal men carrying the sin of flesh which originates from our foremost ancestor Adam, we all have individual weaknesses. Also, the destinies of every person may differ from that of others; i.e our respective destiny & purpose in life must not be the same.

Thus, in the case of Esau & Jacob, the destinies of these two (2) brothers as ordained by God differed. That does not mean Esau automatically had a doomed life; no.

Note that God may decide to destine Bro. A to become the President of Nigeria, while that of Bro. B is to become a Sch. Teacher. Would you then say Bro. B automatically has a doomed destiny & God was being partial in favour of Mr. A?
Of course not.
Both individuals have equal opportunity of being successful in their respective life pursuits, unless any one of them decides to abandon the way of the Lord. Only then will such destiny becomes doomed.

kingralph:
The question is what makes one a good girl or bad girl? Who is a good girl and who is a bad girl?

Good questions bro.
The irony of it all is a lot of the supposedly 'good/godly' girls tend to have certain attitudes that often prevent good guys from approaching them for relationship.

For instance, some tend to be so judgemental, unfriendly, and extremely reserved; thereby unintentionally sending away prospective suitors who did mean well.

Thus, being a godly lady doesn't just mean being religious, but it also means relating well with every person one comes across with utmost humility, kindness & respect.

what a clown! lol

nsesam:
There is every possibility that the pregnancy is 60% urs, if she could keep her virginity till last year and allow you disvirgin her even with all her clubbing why would she open her legs now After engagement.
Don't forget there are Women that keep guys without sex , sometimes out of love and fear of losing the man the love can lie silly lies. If you truly love her go on your kneels and pray for God to show u sign if she's urs. You can't concluded because she went to club or deny who called her pls.

My question to @op is if she is as wayward as he 'assumes' (since he still has no valid proof that she cheated); how come he met her a virgin & was even the one that deflowered her

That is why I always advise young girls never to lose their virginity to any man that ain't the husband; be it boyfriend, fiancé, or whatever silly name.

Clearly, you have used her already and now feel it is time to dump her for maybe another innocent 'virgin' out there. Well, just know that karma is real.

nsesam:
There is every possibility that the pregnancy is 60% urs, if she could keep her virginity till last year and allow you disvirgin her even with all her clubbing why would she open her legs now After engagement.
Don't forget there are Women that keep guys without sex , sometimes out of love and fear of losing the man the love can lie silly lies. If you truly love her go on your kneels and pray for God to show u sign if she's urs. You can't concluded because she went to club or deny who called her pls.

My question to @op is if she is as loose as he 'assumes' (since he still has no valid proof that she cheated); how come he met her a virgin & was even the one that deflowered her

That is why I always advise young girls never to lose their virginity to any man that ain't the husband; be it boyfriend, fiancé, or whatever silly name.

Clearly, you have used her already and now feel it is time to dump her for maybe another innocent 'virgin' out there. Well, just know that karma is real.

SWORD419:
fear south

You are right. Fear South!

neocortex:


Well, she is wrong in making up unfounded statistics to back up her point but some
set of men who accuses women of bringing nothing to the table will still be the one
to cry foul if the wife becomes wealthier.




Here you commit the same offence as the lady you quoted, how many Nigerian men do you know
to make such a baseless generalisation.



This trait is primarily a male one as you hardly find women who whine about not being in charge of
their home.



Please speak for yourself as you are not a standard of behaviour for all men.


You are right insecure and possessive men are found everywhere in the world.



You should have included the full reference here so that others can check. Mind you when a large segment
of women are working(60% are part of the workforce in the US), is it any surprise that those who are not
are less happier ?
It is called peer pressure and has nothing to do with gender but humans in general.



Since women wants control over everything as you claimed don't you think they should be ecstatic
that they make more money ?



It is normal for men who feel they are losing control of their home to feel unhappy.



Again context matters, please provide the full reference. But will you be surprised
that a full time housewife care more for her surroundings ?



Of course it is not, but that doesn't make it right either.



Of course her stat has no factual basis.



Sorry to burst your bubble you just picked out a statement that support your
position and excluding the context, here is a part of the forbes article I presume you
referenced:

So, if career women are bad marriage bets, so are career men.

And let me leave you with this rebuttal to your reference here:



At the bold, speak for yourself.



Again, you paint a picture of all richer women based on a subjective observation.

When wealth disparity is obvious, this behaviour may be exhibited by the family whether in a man or woman
as people generally tend to marry within their social group and those who don't may be resisted by their in-laws.
Then I ask if someone isn't welcome in a family , why try to prove himself when he can just walk away ?



The last time I checked women gets tagged as gold-diggers more often than men for obvious reasons.



An easy way to solve this problem is to marry an housewife and maybe get a written agreement
that she will never go into business so that your ego won't be bruised.



This is a false statement, control and dominance is the perogative of males,
some men can go to the extreme to exert control over their wife.
Are you aware that a third of women murders in the US is caused by their male partners ?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/09/men-killing-women-domesti_n_5927140.html
And it is primarily for ego, ownership and control reasons. So women naturally wants control theory
does not hold water.



Again, you break your own rule can you point to any survey you did that confirm your position.
You should never have responded if you also believe in making wild assumptions about people
you know little about.



This is a choice any woman can make.


It is as if you know her personally, but if you don't this is a misplaced advice as it
adds nothing to the discussion except to make your opponent look bad.





Because broke ladies got divorced doesn't mean a woman can't be sent parking because she is richer than her husband.
There are no rules on reason why divorce should occur. Someone could be divorced because of cheating while another
due to "lack of respect"or both, they are not always mutually exclusive.

So men should marry women that fits their description of a wife so as not
to end up as frustrated whiners who complain bitterly about how bad women are.

I really didn't want to comment on this thread, but I felt the need to appreciate you for this great reply to that guy you quoted.

Truly speaking & without being guilty of the fallacy of generalisation, we (Nigerian men) are the major problem of Nigeria as a country. The day we collectively change our selfish mindset always packaged as 'ego', that is the day this country will begin to experience unhindered progress.

Irrespective of gender, wealth often brings a kind of superiority complex in any Individual. That is still no justification for a spouse to loathe his/her better-half's progress.

**********double post************

cheyi:
I'm just curious..Statistics showed that some rich men die early compared to the poor men..Even with all the money they have,don't understand what seems to be the problem. .

Get rich and die young,remain poor and live long..which is better?

Baseless & false assertion.
The mortality rate among the poor is higher than that of the rich. That is the fact!

Police Officers should always act professionally in the discharge of their duty, while the citizens should endeavour to always obey simple orders & directives. Shikenan!

Psychos everywhere. Rest In Peace Pa Godwin.

Disgusting losers, smh.

Hmm, so adorable. May God sustain the babies & grant the parents the funds to properly cater for them; amen.

GeneralOjukwu:
Mr Man...be a man & have some balls. Your family &your wife have marked you a weakling to toss around.

Most of the comments here are on the side of the wife. That's amusing.

There's a proverb - "What elders can see from afar, a youngster can't" WHY DO THEY UNANIMOUSLY DISLIKE HER? They might see something that you can't see due to Kama Sutra.

Whomever you decide to side, make a stance now. Just remember you would be a fool to abandon your blood. You would regret it



You can find another wife tomorrow...Can you find other parents? Vagina can be magnetic, walahi

Remember she is now his wife and not his girlfriend. So he should abandon his wife, the mother of his child, because of his relatives

Would he have been happy with his dad if same was done to his mom? The adage about what an elder sees blablabla is not always correct because no mortal human is above making wrong decisions/mistakes in life, & this includes our elders.

The Holy Bible I believe in says "What God has joined together (in marriage), let NO MAN put asunder".

My advise is he should restrict his relatives' incessant interference in his marriage, & endeavour to make them see reason why their hateful attitude towards his spouse has been causing him great pain, unless the want him to die of high b.p.

cc, deleSayo

[quote author=legalwealth post=36410533]

Ok but note that PayPal only allow one personal and one premier/business account per individual.

Kindly request for the guide from info@ijamsolution.com[/quo

frubben:
the op is not the problem here, he just told u guys that they have being together for 2years before marrige. Meaning the girl knows about his anger issues so that's not a problem for her because she went ahead to marry him. Now the problem I why the girl dey vex yyamayama vex now after she Don marry. Dis somebody that u tay with for 2years with the anger issues and even born for am now she want to dey say she cannot cope. Another guyy Don enter matter lock up.m

It's true they are suppose to have fully familiarize themselves & adapted to each other's personal traits at this point.

However, there's still nothing bad in requesting a partner to do away with a bad trait.

They both have every right to be angry with each other's behaviour as a couple. But they need to learn how to always reach a compromise after any disagreement between them. These issues do happen in marriage a lot. What matters is how the spouses handle their misunderstandings with love & wisdom.

So @Op needs to work things out with his wife please.

My sincere advice is that you work on your temper @OP. From your story, it is obvious you are quick to anger, which is capable of destroying any marriage.

The first problem you raised was entirely the fault of your wife's family. So I wonder why you acted harshly towards your wife.

And with respect to the second issue, the manner in which you confront your spouse determines how she reacts or responds to you. You need to learn how to talk to her calmly with love; not harshly with so much bitterness or venom.

Once again, don't give up on your marriage please. Every marriage has its ups & downs. And no human is perfect. We only strive to be perfect. Peace!

Fountaincrest:
Restrain your abuses till you hear the mans side of the story o. The woman is doing innocent face if you hear how far she has gone you will understand why the man did. That.

That would not still change the fact that he acted foolishly by chaining a human being like a lower animal, while his wife showcased wisdom by reporting him to the appropriate authority.

At the end of it all, he still remains the foolish one between them.

kayyat:
Gay marriage in Zaria

Yes. Particularly in Sabon-gari and tudun wada areas of Zaria.

Protagonist:


I have tried severally to end the relationship, but she won't stop coming. Before you know it, we are on again. Last night's trouble left me with terrible injuries that I couldn't go to work today.
She has left, but I'm sure she will be here tomorrow, when she feels things have settled. And beg

If all you said is true, for how long do you intend to continue enduring such abuse Is this the kind of life you wish to live in marriage? My advise is that you end that abusive relationship as soon as possible, because you also deserve to be happy.

RicoBee:
This question has been on my mind for sometime. I've been a member of this forum for close to a decade. I remember in those days, I mean those halcyon days, Nairaland used to be a haven of comfort where members who were disconsolate found solace.

I remember an instance where a lady asked where Viagra could be bought where she resided. For her to come out with such, she probably wanted to rescue her marriage. The replies she got were heart lifting. People asked her who needed it. She replied that it's someone close to her. No one laughed at her or denigrated her. People came to her aid and offered assistance. Both doctors and those from other professions. She left a happier woman.

That was some years ago. Fast forward to 2017, if such a woman had come to Nairalanders for help, I mean that kind of help, you would hear derogatory words like olosho, ashewo, runs girl, etc.

We must all fight this nasty attitude of these kind of people. That is a major way, Nairaland as a forum can regain its glory.

One Last Shot: For those of you, who may want to attack me with invective, bring it on. You will definitely not be dignified with my response, for they are golden.

Peace!
RicoBee.

cc. Lalasticlala

I totally agree with you on this. The mods really need to do something to curb such ill mannered posts by the increasing irresponsible nairalanders of today.

Their waywardness on this forum is really getting too much gaskiya.

Firstcitizen:
Ademola2017,

Going by the comments, I hope you have learnt your lesson for bringing your relationship issues to Nairaland. You have been hurt and in pain but coming here will lead you to depression with such brutal comments from imbec.iles and minors who hover round this thread like bees.

You have done nothing wrong by falling in love and following your heart. Even those that use their heads rather than hearts miscalculate a lot hence the marital social media drama we witness from our role models daily.

You are bold for following your heart. You are a man. The man. A strong man and you will handle this like.....a real man.

We all had past relationships and some are friendly with their exes even overly friendly. Some people tolerate it some don't. It does not mean something is going on but it can hurt a man's pride which is the case here. First thing is to take advantage of the present situation and put a total end to that.

Now the issue of past cheating before marriage and discovered after signing the dotted lines have been a controversial issue with divergent views from even relationship experts. I will break it down to the Nigerian context. Even the holier than thou in Nigeria does so especially among the ladies who are competitive with peers when it comes to getting the 'perfect' suitor. I will try not to be politically correct. The average Nigerian lady has one or two backup relationships in case things go pear shaped. It's now our way of life and somehow become acceptable. Marriage is the start of a new type of relationship and not a continuation of the other. That is why you are asked to forsake others when making your vows.

Do you forgive such?. Yes absolutely. As young adults we all follow the trend, want what is acceptable to others who sniff us and wish us to fail and want to show off. We make mistakes in the process but there is always time for redemption. This is it. Forgive this and move on.

Now the most tricky part which is her attitude towards you. You both share the blame. The greatest love is the one that is learnt. Her attitude does not mean she does not love you. It's just a bad habit you guys allowed to fester. Having 2 relationships means one treats you good and the other is a bad boy. All women are drawn to the one with a little bit of danger. So she gives all the bu.llsh.it she gets to the good guy to ease up her strain or to keep the relationship at a level it does not get too serious and spoil both. It's a hard job and some play it well while others mess it up. When you got married you should have helped her correct her habits She acquired to manage both relationships but you ignored it. Now She chose to marry you. Forget all what your mind tells you about being second choice. If she did not love you she will keep hoping for another Mr perfect. Respect that and move on.

Your wife made mistakes like we all do. This is an opportunity to correct all the faults in your marriage and enjoy it. Punish her a little, read out loud that riot act but still pamper her with moderation and forgive her. I think you just got presented with all the opportunity in world to have a blissful marriage.

Caveat: Take relationship advice on the internet at your own risk

The ONLY sensible post in the thread. @Ademola2017, take note.

Rest In Peace to our martyred Christian brethren in Egypt. No matter how the demons of islam strive to bring the Church down, they will never succeed because even their paedophile prophet tried same and failed woefully.

It's a pity. The evil that men do; Smh.
R.I.P to the deceased woman.

Flaghouse1:


If not for the fact that defamation can lead to death with people who are not emotion ally strong .ir is supposed to be regarded as a civil case, so what I am saying in rsdencr is that tweaking our laws as far as this discourse is concerned may not be feasible

Yep.
The chances of amending the law is very slim I must say.