₦airaland Forum

Yes we can also confirm that Buhari earned a kindergarten certificate in cattle rearing and theft from state treasuries.

Shite Bokkohari !

sCun:
That animal constitutes a real nuisance.
I lived close to river Niger between Kwara and Niger state during NYSC, I know the kind of problems hippos cause for fishermen and boat transporters, they were responsible for a lot of boat mishaps.
So the reason for killing it might not be for its meat alone.

Were the hippos in Benue state gathered in herds like you see on Discovery Channel, or have they been hunted to near extinction in Nigeria ?

falconey:
give me a good reason to vote for GEJ.....I school in the north can he guarantee my safety??

A one-word response would be "ELECTRICITY". Yes sir, Nigeria HAS electrical power now, but did NOT have it before Jonathan took office.


The Jonathan Goodluck government has overseen DRAMATIC improvements in the generation and nationwide distribution of stable electrical power to Nigeria's population, enabling once-dormant industries to emerge from suspended animation and spring to life, reviving the national economy by increment with each passing quarterly profit sheet that is published in board rooms across the reawakened nation of Nigeria.


Going beyond the citation of "one reason" to re-elect Jonathan Goodluck, may I remind you that the Shagamu to Benin Expressway, along with other federal highways too numerous to mention, has been comprehensively rebuilt from the foundation upwards, creating a pristine asphalt runway surface smooth enough to allow the proverbial watch-maker to ply his trade with ease while seated aboard a vehicle travelling those hundreds of miles of re-born roads crisscrossing the federal republic of Nigeria. Yes sir, this unsung miracle, and many others also now taken for granted, came to pass thanks to the ACTIONS of the current Jonathan Goodluck administration, which in so doing eclipsed the achievements of ALL national governments Nigeria has witnessed ever since her independence from British rule in 1960.

The estimated number of human lives saved, due to reduced traffic accident rates recorded on Nigeria's expanding network of beautifully recreated roads, simply cannot be quantified, thanks in great part to a fearless, innovative, learned and compassionate Izon Egbesu Warrior Chief named Dr. Jonathan Ebele Goodluck, who, in just a few short weeks from this day, will by carried shoulder-high by a grateful and joyous people voting at the polls, signifying that Mr. Jonathan Goodluck will be MANDATED to ride that wild tiger in Abuja once again, until the good year 2019.

This election mega-victory shall be bestowed at the overwhelming insistence of the Nigerian people whose memories serve them well enough that they recognize a progressive and enlightened leader when they see one, regardless of all distractions bound to emanate from the background white-noise that traditionally accompanies national electioneering.

I could go on for a while longer sir, but suffice to say Jonathan Goodluck WILL serve a second term in office as Nigeria's elected president, and Weeping General Buhari, the ever-sore loser, will cry and sob like a baby in public as always, before heading to court even as he gets on the phone to order more suicide bombings on voters, by his personally funded terror gang - Boko Haram.


Thank you and God bless.

Hello Rawdeal, in my haste to describe the process I forgot to mention the important step of pouring the HOT mixture through cloth to filter out the weed for disposal BEFORE setting the mixture aside to cool and separate into the upper oil layer and the lower layer of waste water.

Thanks also for your description of a faster the process using the microwave. I might get up the nerve to try that idea sometime. I agree too that our lungs are designed to process air and not the fumes of anything burnt, and with that in mind, those inclined to ingest their medicine would do well to give coconut oil a try, as it is indeed a very good vehicle of delivery, if not the best.

After generations of being outlawed virtually everywhere, any mention of marijuana's properties, even as a potent pain-reducing skin balm, for example, continues to elicit responses ranging from disapproval to disbelief, which to an extent explains why the PROVEN pain-killing properties achievable with this particular method of THC extraction have until very recently been largely unknown to mainstream medical practice.

With a tidal wave of new legislation decriminalizing medicinal and recreational marijuana use in the USA and Europe, the dark years of weed prohibition, which sent many a peaceful and productive toker to jail for no other reason, are drawing to a merciful close. As Jamaica now stands poised to make legal and profit hugely from Ganja production, one hopes that Africa will follow the tide of common sense and do the right thing - Legaliiiiize it, yeah, so I-and-I will let dem TAAAAX it.

This bud's for you, RealDeal.

Truckpusher:
All this information that you people are sharing......Papi, Na only you waka come?

Ha ha ha All this oil they are sharing ! E get as e be.

In summary, first bake the weed in the oven on a tray at 300 degrees for no more than 30 minutes. Do it late at night because of the smell.

Now add the slightly browned weed to a mixture of coconut oil and water. Cook on VERY LOW heat for several hours, late at night again.

Remove the heat, and pour through a double layer of clean white cloth to remove the weed for disposal.

Allow the hot solution of oil and water to to cool, then place in the fridge to solidify the oil floating on top of the water layer.

Retain the solid oil and pour away the water, which contains nothing of any use, smells terrible and tastes even worse.

Now you have coconut oil that can be used as balm that will stop pain instantly, or that can be used to bake "magic" cookies for restful sleep.

Chai ! ! Diariz God o !

Truckpusher:
Thank you papi

The best part is you throw away the weed once it has been used and extracted in this way, which means NO legal worries over the innocent looking oil stored in solid form in the freezer.

Truckpusher:
Now, that's my lady.

This bud's for you Truckpusher

Substitute coconut oil instead of butter in this procedure for better results
https://www.icmag.com/ic/showthread.php?s=05b6fd8e411c24bc18e12730ae25c01b&t=12895

This one uses coconut oil, and is highly purified to remove ALL scent and taste of weed, yet retain its potency in HIGHLY concentrated form.
https://www.icmag.com/ic/showthread.php?s=05b6fd8e411c24bc18e12730ae25c01b&t=269402&highlight=canna+coconut

The above medical oils can be used to bake cookies that are great for people who have trouble getting to sleep at night.

Half a cookie = Lights out till daybreak.

One cookie = Summon paramedics

TheFreeOne:
Buhari school principal wrote to the military in his letter of recommendation that "BUHARI WILL PASS...
That is self explanatory that GMB never finished secondary education not to talk of having a certificate.

[size=16pt]The truth is that his so called missing certificate only existed in the imagination of his school principal[/size].

Well, an imaginary certificate is still better than NO certificate at all, and certainly a "virtual" credential will be adequate to qualify Buhari for engagement as stray dog catcher in his village out there in the Sahara Desert, just as soon as he adds yet another chapter to his unbroken record of humiliating electoral losses.

Truckpusher:
Calling for the assassination of an Islamic fundamentalist won't solve any problem.

You have point there for sure. There is no point turning that illiterate monkey into a martyr that would then be worshiped by the hungry hordes of beggars in his remote village.

It is far better to ensure that all Buhari's fraudulent claims about being educated are debunked one after the other, so as to assure unbroken continuity for the Weeping General's record of 25 consecutive election defeats, after which the career loser will be free to go back to his village and accept that open offer of a gig as stray dog-catcher for the local government out there in the desert, where he can also be close to his Boko Haram terror gang cowards.

Stoning the Boko Haram terror gang leader will accomplish very little besides humiliate the unrepentant killer for few minutes.

On the other hand, positioning a seasoned sniper a few hundred years off, where there is a clean line of fire to the location where the geriatric massacre instigator sits in his usual stupor WOULD be an enormously beneficial culling project to undertake for any group that is appropriately equipped and determined.

Rawdeal:
find an aboki that sells it and pay him to buy plenty for you. buy fresh coconut oil and watch the extraction process on YouTube. it's not difficult. use a microwave

Could you please enlighten us about the tight and tasty buttocks in your profile picture.

Is it yours by any chance ? Inquiring minds want to know.

Buhari should be proud of having been able to produce evidence that he attended kindergarten at some point, and the fact that he failed woefully in all subjects should not deter he and his family from joyously celebrating his landmark achievement a hundred years ago.

Moving up to the present, obviously an illiterate person is NOT qualified for any sort of elected position in even the most backward country on Earth, BUT, it ought to be possible for a local government chairman, somewhere in the Sharianistan desert republic, to award Buhari an HONORARY village dog-catcher title that he can proudly retain for the rest of his miserable existence over there in the burning sands.

May I suggest this title : Weeping General Buhari D.O.G, C.a.t.c.h

Thank you and God bless.

falconey:
The media, jonathan campaign team and some nairalanders have turn attack on buhari as daily routine.........topics every day on buhari AGE,CERT,ILLITERACY etc even jonathan sometime forget national issues and lambast buhari. Whereas the ruling party brought us to the mess we are today as a nation not GEN BUHARI. Lot of rules have been broken.

Buhari's sneaky sponsorship and public statements of support for the Boko Haram terror group mean that Buhari could be declared at any moment a fugitive from justice eminently qualified to face prosecution on charges of crimes against humanity, by the International Criminal Court who have received multiple petitions appealing for the apprehension and trial of Buhari for his role in the organized slaughter of election officials in the wake of Nigeria's 2011 presidential election in which Buhari suffered total annihilation at the polls.

The fact that Buhari has been exposed as a functional illiterate with NO formal credentials of academic pursuit to his name is yet another nail in the coffin of the born-to-rule ambitions nursed by Buhari ever since his brutal military junta was overthrown and tossed into the septic tank of history back in Africa's very dark 1980's.

A highly educated, articulate and performance-driven opposition presidential candidate, in the caliber of current Lagos State Governor Barrister Raji Fashola, would have given the incumbent President Jonathan a serious run for his money in the upcoming 2015 presidential elections, but rather than field such a gladiator, the Nigerian opposition chose to shuffle forward with a half-dead geriatric numb-skull fundamentalist with copious blood on his bony hands, who can barely stumble his way through a simple sentence in the English language.

A re-election of Jonathan Goodluck has therefore been assured both on the strength of Goodluck's own performance track record in office thus far as President of the Nigerian Federation, but, ironically, in direct consequence assured by the presentation of a certified iimbecile as a presidential candidate, by an evidently disoriented opposition party which clearly would be challenged to locate its own buttocks by groping with both hands.

gulfer:
And to think Muna Obiekwe just died like that without any of these [size=14pt]glorified houkers[/size] making concerted effort to save him like she just did for her dawg.

If that innocent dog should get to hear about what you have written in this forum, the poor thing is bound to get very upset indeed, and might even bite her hairdresser or manicurist when they come calling. By speaking so disrespectfully about the dog in the above picture, you might even cause pain and mental anguish to the dog's owner, which is simply unacceptable.

Please kindly retract all the cruel words you typed above, and promise right now never engage in such speculative rumor mongering again. Your apology will only be accepted if you express genuine repentance and willingness to change your reckless ways.

laffytaffy1:
There should be a law that bans people like the posters above me from eating dog meat. How can you look at that cute face and still have the appetite to eat something so precious.

I eat dog meat because it causes me to bark and chase women both fine and ugly. This is why I eat dog meat, and the cuter looking the dog, the better for taste.

Wow this is odd. A woman who is NOT overweight and yet is allowed find work as an actress in Nigeria. All those elderly heads of cattle will be worried now, since a young and beautiful woman has her foot in the door.

OrlandoOwoh:
You are one of the spawns.

To undo this terrible curse you have placed on me, I now have to bathe with snail slime for seven days without interruption. Diaris God o.

Ha ha ha I wish her best of luck with the pregnancy. It looks like it will be twins.

lumdy:
The 45-year-old actress, who antecedently dated 27-year-old dancer casper smart for over 2 years, thinks the term is sexist and offensive.

She said: "I hate that they have a label for a girl who would date a younger guy. If a younger guy is curious about you, what is the big deal? what is the word for the man who's after younger girls?"

read more here:http://www.lumdys.com/2015/01/jennifer-lopez-hates-being-called-cougar.html

If a cougar is defined as an old woman who likes getting humped by young men, then Jenny from the block is a cougar, and an increasingly desperate one at that.

There is nothing offensive or sexist about growing old, and Mrs. Lopes needs to just accept that her sell-by date has long past, since the public is all about those 20-something women, and not the 40-something matronly types that Mrs Lopez has become.

Ha ha it is only in Nigeria where most women have never heard of physical exercise, that a nasty fat ho', with cottage cheese lard spilling out all over, could dress in ffucking spandex and actually go about showing off that nasty, disgusting toad body as though it is something to celebrate.

I find it so odd that Nigeria, which is home to MILLIONS of nicely toned, BEAUTIFUL and youthful women, would ignore them entirely, and only showcase the oldest and most hideously ugly heads of cattle in existence, as examples of feminine beauty. Anyone who finds that mother-of-six lard-asz in ANY way interesting will almost certainly be the type who gets aroused by sight of wallowing hippos in the Zambezi river mud-flats.

Damn, I shudder with revulsion just thinking about the horrid pictures posted here. The horror. The horror.

As the most visible member of the Boko Haram terror gang, it only makes sense that Weeping General Buhari would try to use fear as a method of control over government officials, in a bid to FORCE them to support his doomed quest to RULE Nigeria by all means possible both fair and foul.

For there to be lasting peace in the West African sub-region, it is essential that the cancerous growth called Buhari is neutralized with extreme prejudice as a matter of great urgency, and sent off to join his genetically defective ancestors languishing in hell.

OrlandoOwoh:
The information reaching us indicates that Buhari never paid the bride price of his first wife whom he married in the 1960's. He produce the certificate of the marriage to prove that his in-laws willingly gave the woman to him. We expect him to give us the number of the certificate, we want to trace it to the Registry of Katsina State. A man without a marriage certificate cannot be our President.

Is it true that several of Weeping General Buhari's spawn were conceived outside of wedlock, meaning they are in essence bastards ?

What the ffuck is all that chit ?

Ha ha ha ha I don't see anything that even remotely resembles a diploma, out of all those pieces of paper offered as even more proof that Buhari would not recognize a diploma even if he was beaten about the head with one ha ha ha.

This dimwit Buhari is far too brain-dead to think of forging a certificate, and far to dull to understand that photocopiers have existed for over 100 years, meaning of course that there can be NO reason under the sun why any person with important educational credentials would not themselves be in possession of either copies or originals of those precious diplomas.

Buhari take your geriatric chit-for-brains attempts to hoodwink the world, and stuff them all up your crusty anus where they belong. It is no longer funny bearing witness to all the frantic dancing about performed by this buffoon Buhari and his cult followers whenever demands for PROOF of education are demanded.

Buhari, there is nothing wrong with your being a stark illiterate, PROVIDED THAT you get it into your thick bony cranium that your being an illiterate automatically DISQUALIFIES you from aspiring to ANY elected office in the Federal Republic of Nigeria, so please, be so kind as to just shut the ffuck up already, and go back where you belong, to your village, you dumb ffuck.

PointB:
Ol boy the thing tire me oo.

I have kept vigil since yesterday hoping to be among the very first to see the elusive certificate of the allegedly unlettered general. Looks like the allegation is true.

Buhari, contrary to his sworn affidavit, does not have a certificate to display! We need volunteers to conduct an Ultimate Search for Buhari certificate.

I wish him Goodluck!

Ha ha ha ha So in short the vigil no produce any result.


Ok, As we don see say to dey conduct LONG vigil alone nogo fit work, na serious fasting, prayer and speaking in tongues system me I go use to FORCE Buharam BACK to kindergarten to go find him certificate NOW-NOW, come show us.

PointB:
Na wa ooo

And the rabbit hole continues to go deeper and deeper! Why is APC this desperate?

Clueless despotic Buhari is an unlettered sickly bigot.


He has to prove that:

1. He's not clueless
2. He's not a despot
3. He's not unlettered (semi-illiterate)
4. He's not ill (or sickly)
5. He's not a bigot

Unfortunately, he's not be able to prove any of these, without using some cheap lies and propaganda, which are continually busted! I only feel pity for those erudite fellows who sheepishly follow the one who attracts almajiris!

Pellow Kwantiri-man. Minini ? Why yan no gree fwa Born to Rule ? Why yan turayi fwa fight am Buhari Boko-soja ?


Looku Mr. Unifasty, make I telli you, Buhari yan no need am fwa ezucation, BECAUSE yan get am felenty sufforter fwa Maiduguri, and felenty Boko Haram soja fwa Zambisa, yowaaa.

Buhari yan go do feresident of Nongeriya by FORCE, gwo fwa Abjua yowaaa, kwallect felenty America dollar money afita crook oil sellam fwa Niger Delta, take am buildi falace fwa Dubai, falace fwa Saudi, falace fwa Buhari village, falace fwa Abuja Walahi Talahi.

HzRF:
11 don reach


Oluwawole cert don pop out ?

As demn just print am finish like dis, na so police come raid Oluwole AGAIN, so, everybody scatter, and we never know for who hand the certificate dey now.

Make we kukuma put the time for 11 O'clock NEXT week, after when we don settle police say make dem no dey come worry us every day.

idumuose:
The promised 9 o'clock press conference by Muhammadu Buhari is being awaited by Nigerians who care about him.

Let us be reminded that Buhari initially sworn a court affidavit and obtained by inec that his certificates are with the secretary to the military board.

Mr integrity later made a u-turn and told bewildered Nigerians that 1983 coup plotters who raided his home stole his certificates.

Buhari will further jeopadize his presidential ambition if he has been advised by Tinubu,himself a chicago certificate forger to forge a wasc certificate at oluwole.

We are waiting.it's just a few minutes to 9 o'clock.

Praise the Lord ! Tinubu the Oluwole Certificate Forgery Arranger must surely rush to help Boko Haram terror gang leader Buhari in this his hour of need, when that bogus sheepskin is needed most of all.

Buhari the Boko Haram the terror gang apologist can sneer for the camera, dress up in tribal regalia and cuddle as many cute babies as he likes, in his comical desperation to show a human side to the sadistic and pathological character he is known to be, since nobody is fooled by that mildly amusing pantomime, as another election defeat looms LARGE for the serial loser.


Rampaging hordes of rented street hoodlums, responding to exhortations from a humiliated and enraged Buhari, chased down and slaughtered election officials when early results indicated yet another well-deserved defeat in the offing for Buhari at the presidential polls of 2011. When the smoke cleared, several dozen election officials lay dead, smoldering and dismembered, in an incident which, among others, has now FINALLY appeared on radar at the International Criminal Court in the Hague, who WILL take appropriate actions in due course.

It is a sad commentary on Nigeria and on Africa in a larger sense, that a stark illiterate individual with solid ties to terror and genocide could thumb his nose at the very notion of justice, and then proceed to embark on a doomed Quixotic voyage to become RULER over the very nation that will, in the fullness of time, facilitate Buhari's arrest and deportation to Holland for trial and incarceration under the jurisdiction of the International Criminal Court.

A likely pass is NOT the same thing as a confirmed and documented pass.

[size=14pt]Buhari is an illiterate, and a simpleton. That is the simple truth.[/size]

There can be NO place for illiterates in any government that hopes to be taken seriously on the world stage.